quote:
Originally posted by amelia28:
Your moon conjuncts mercury opposing uranus in the 3rd and both squaring saturn, neptune rules your IC and inconjuncts VENUS:I would say your Mom wants to shape you to be and think a certain way which is at odds with the direction you feel driven to philosophically and how you want to approach different areas of your life. You want to please her but you want to follow your instincts and own path that is different from what she wants. This makes you feel torn and leads to you not feeling sure about what your values are and even what girls to date as she wants you to date a certain type of girl but you are looking for something different so again you feel this conflict between going after what you want or pleasing her. You two argue a lot. Perhaps your mom wants you date a girl from your hometown but you want something more exotic. There will be conflict with your roots and desire to travel or your roots and your love life in some way. You will feel pulled one way by your mother/home/roots and the other by SO/partner. You will try to please both but it will feel uncomfortable or you will have to sacrifice something and you will end up sacrificing roots as your partner will help you reach your hopes and dreams, gets along with your friends and will give you children. You will start a new life with this partner and learn enough about psychology to heal your wounds created by your mother/parents/childhood to not repeat with the same mistakes with your partner. It will be a fresh start with her but you will need to let go of your roots, perhaps relocate and start fresh.
I feel you did not have a dad growing up,perhaps he died when you were very young or left and your mom raised you by herself and did her best but she is very free spirited herself and perhaps put fun first before you, none the less she is the closest family you have. If you have any siblings I dont think you have a great relationship with them either. I get the sense that you are going to break away from your roots, maybe move away to be with a girl and start fresh; you will keep in touch with family/moon/siblings and visit sometimes but you want stay in your hometown..you need this move to heal, rebuilt yourself and start fresh with new patterns.
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What do you think?
Most of what you said for me is very true..
'I would say your Mom wants to shape you to be and think a certain way which is at odds with the direction you feel driven to philosophically and how you want to approach different areas of your life.'
This is particularly true, my mom and I do often argue but it is never usually related to things like girls although when the topic does arise, I disagree with her entirely.
My mom got together with my dad when she was in her 20s and she's been with him ever since (both have Venus conjunct Saturn in natal and in synastry)
I do feel rather detatched from my family and I feel we don't have a rather deep connection with one another. I feel like my parents don't know enough about me as a person and they'll fail to accept how I want to live my life and how I'll move forward. My parents are both very conservative people and although I love them both, I am closer with my mother more so than with my father.
In regards to the relationship with my father, it's been weird. We disagree on ALOT (and I mean alot) of things and I think there's so many things that I didn't get to learn or experience with him. My relationships with my parents specifically deteriorated a few years ago because I just felt things weren't going right at home (transiting Uranus exactly over my IC)
Things have improved but I don't think the relationship will be as strong as I want it to be. I think it's just too difficult for all of us. I think it'd be difficult for me because although I love them to bits, it'll be too hard for me to fully open up and some doors would always remain closed..
My mother herself is very free spirited deep down I'd say, particularly at her home. Whenever we go back to home abroad, she seems so much more at peace with herself, much more free-spirited, alive and I see a side to her I wouldn't see when she is here. She moved to the UK when she had me when she was young and she has never really coped with it. I can't imagine all the pain and hurt she must have been through in her experience of coming to the UK. She's always been so afraid of everything and she often is compulsive over really little things. She hasn't worked in her life ever and I think because her environment is so different and she believes it to be so cruel, she avoids it and I think this is attributed to the fact that her Pluto is at SUCH a critical degree and also because her Moon is square Pluto. (29 degrees and 50 minutes and 30 seconds Pluto in Virgo; so close to being in Libra)
I hope one day my mom would return to her home abroad because she seems much happier there and I think it'd be much easier for her to live her life with all her family and friends
However, I am different. I want to move abroad when I'm older and live elsewhere because I think where I've grown up has really limited me in expanding myself and really finding out what life has to offer. I've always been restless and I'll admit I was a really rebellious child, never listened to my parents and I think that might be attributed to that Moon opposite Uranus.
My dad I feel like I've always been somewhat detached from as well and I've never really had a strong fatherly bond to him at all. My mom told me once how I used to cry so loudly as a baby when my dad went to work. I've always wondered why. I've never understood what it is my dad wants from me.
My brother, I also love but at the same time, I don't feel as close to him. I think with my whole family I am rather aloof and the whole atmosphere for me is sort of cold.
My dream is to move away when I'm older but something inside me has that real fear of worry and discontent. I fear that I'll miss my home too much even
though it's the place where I've felt the most hurt. I'm afraid that even if I settle down with someone, it just won't be safe for me and I'll miss my family too much. It's sort of an internal conflict but I think I'll be able to overcome it and learn more about myself.
Thanks for your interpretation. It is much appreciated and has allowed me to really think about these aspects specifically and given me a deeper insight into my own chart. I think when I found astrology, it was a way of getting to know myself better and it really has been helpful in beginning to expand my knowledge of myself
and others. Once again thanks