These are not meant to be accurate, it's for entertainment value. If they are accurate, kudos! Enjoy Aries: "Hey, you wanna be friends? Okay, we can be friends, just DON'T MAKE ME ANGRY. I will SHOOT YOU DOWN, YOU HEAR ME?!"
Taurus: "Everybody thinks that I just have so much money and am just so rich, but I don't even have enough to feed my family." *is seen wearing $500 jacket*
Gemini: "Hey random person! Do you want to know about my life, okay so I just went to the store today and I was just looking at some new jeans and I was like, 'omg, these don't fit me at all!' they were like huge and bulbous and, oh did you hear about the new movie coming out?! It is so..."
Cancer: "My mommy won't pick me up from school! I love her so much and she told me that I deal with it. That's so cruel!!" *continues crying endlessly*
Leo: "I just walk into the area and EVERYBODY knows me! I'm just so fabulous; if there's someone not looking at me, I will RIP their head off and hold it so that they are forced to look at me!! So, how was your day? Were you thinking about me?"
Virgo: "Everybody is so disgusting! They never brush their teeth, they've got stains all over their shirts, they don't even see these things! How could they be so oblivious, I mean anybody with common sense should see it!"
Libra: "Oh wow, you're so beautiful and so cool! I just love the way you do things...let's be BESTIES!!!!"
*never answers your calls, never texts you, never asks you to do anything with them* *you meet up again*
"Oh hey! We should totally hang out!"
Scorpio: "I hate you all! All you want to do is get into my privacy! You don't even know how stupid you are; I'm not going to waste my time explaining this to you because you're too stupid to see it. I know you better than you know yourself!!"
Sagittarius: *Is literally so happy you think they are extremely shallow and superficial* "So, I don't want to go to calculus. Let's talk about Jesus! We can do this when we're heading to Greece! I've your tacky tourist outfit already ready!"
Capricorn: "You're just a bunch of whiners. Why don't you just do the work; you'll be done with it anyways. The only reason I have no friends is because everybody thinks I'm a living robot; I mean, I don't understand."
Aquarius: "Hey, come hang out with me and do these things nobody else is interested in! I'm at every group meetup and everybody knows who I am. Look at my alien-like face!"
Pisces: "Who am I? What am I? Where am I? What is this place? Who are you? What are you doing? Oh, is that what you're doing? I think I forgot. Oops, what are we supposed to do? Oh yeah, I remember. I'm you, with all the flaws removed."
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Scorpio Ascendant
Aquarius Sun in 4th
Gemini Moon in 8th
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