posted January 07, 2005 11:56 PM            

BTW, what are your other aspects? Where in your chart does Venus lie? Just out of curiosity...

Good for you if you are a bit more grounded than the rest of us.. I know I wish I could be more 'earthy' at times.

posted January 08, 2005 03:48 AM            

I think Tauruses drive me nuts with the control thing. I tend to not try to get too invested in them or confide in them to much because they eventually show their condescension towards my ecentricities.

There are some guys that I have gotten involved with or interested in who eventually lecture me on my emotions. The lecture that I should not have them or that I'm dependent. It's that I have worked hard to keep the relationship going or I have extended my kindness soo much that I have become drained.

Aquarius Broken
When the cup pours out it's over
See everything else fall down.
When the cup pours out it's over
See everything else falls down.
Here's to you..
Here's to you..
and a little something for my homies
Here's to you..
Here's to you..
Now you're drenched and I have nothing left
but a nakedness, look up my dress.
When it pours
Nothing is left.
When she pours.
There's nothing left..
Let it rain instead.

I read in "The Only Astrology Book You'll Ever Need" that Aquarian women tend to attract men who like to stir their emotions. In reality, I have to admit to myself, I really do want a man who I can express my emotions to freely. One who I feel safe with and understood. But in the meanwhile, I don't know any guy who I am safe with. I fall for guys that are deep, spiritual and intellectual, who I think could handle me, but I don't get the right responses. Meanwhile, I get guys who follow me around, thinking I'm just a cute, sweet girl to bring home to mom, not knowing I'm crazy.

As for Aqua guys, my first boyfriend was an Aqua. I felt neglected. We started off really talkative and affectionate, especially since it was right around Valentines. Slowly, we talked less and less, getting in our own worlds. We were together for a year and he never told me he loved me. He always had excuses why he wasn't around. I still don't know what the hell he was up to. A year after I dumped him, he tried to contact me to see if we could be friends. I just didn't feel like spending anymore time on him.

As of right now, I have a friend that I've known for a month or so. His birthday is only a few weeks after mine. We have every aspect in common except ascendant, moon and venus. We're also raven totems. We think the same, we feel the same. It is so bizarre. I can tell him anything and it's as if it's already in his head. At the same time, we can go hours without speaking to each other, and that's ok. I don't think I would personally date an Aquarian guy. They're not bad guys but I think I need to go for a Leo or an Aries. Someone who's different than me and fiery. More air just puts me in orbit with no way to land.

Oh, as for the space. I'm big on hugs, but kisses and everything beyond kind of gets to me after a while. I don't need a reason for a hug. Sometimes I'll hang out with friends and just hug them. With some alcohol in me, I'll just randomly start hugging everybody. LOL. I remember last time I was with my ex, he walked up to me and in my head I was like, "Oh no, here he comes with that tongue.."

posted January 08, 2005 05:41 AM              

My Aqua(sun) friend conceals her emotions successfully from others.To those who watch from outside,it may look horrible to see how quickly she ignored her dear friend just because her friend got possessive.But she was equally hurt which she hided in playfulness.

I am quite emotional despite my aqua moon(Its true that most of people wont know it).At times i can b detached with my own emotions..!Quite a contradiction
My sis is also aqua moon.She doesnt show much emotion.But she's very emotional deep inside.

posted January 08, 2005 10:06 AM              

So I have no problem with giving space, after all I have all this Aries in my chart, but I do not like it when the space is controlled, or when its' only when someone else needs comfort or support. The Aquas I know also control that space, say when, how long, where which is very controlling and domineering towards the other person. I think its' funny how one person can so want space and freedom and inflict their standards and reality on another person because it's easy.

I do stand up for myself, but if I didn't I know several Aquas who would be happy to let me be the doormat, without any guilt. To me it's a dangerous position to be in, as my knowlege is power because of my very strong Sun.

Strong suns think knowlege is power, and protecting fragility is a must. To give out that power to someone else who will use it and then on top of that hurt me and not respect me because of where it came from, is not friendly, it's more backstabbing. I have to say I have been backstabbed in business more by Aquas than Geminis, but in the end I have great respect for their intelligence and power, more than Gemini.

At not time though, does a relationship ever pan out for me because of the fragility I have to protect and my secrets which are not for everyone. There is no way to be a comforter, and receive no comfort back.

Aquas do value emotions, they do not value uncontrolled emotion, or comfort, that does not equate to love. But love is uncontrolled emotion, and it's not conditional, for some reason Aquas can be very jealous to see two people madly in love, but it's because it's uncontrolled.

I judge that attitude because hurting others to get love, is not very trustworthy. And we are loved by how many people trust us and love us, and someone will always hurt you, if you hurt someone else first by being jealous or envious or insecure. That is the worst sort of criticism.

I have been very judgemental of Aquas who swear they are open minded and then I watch him or her tear someone down because that person is emotional, in love and kissing someone else in the street, that's not "normal" right?

Aquarius goes back and forth between causing disruptions, and then fixing them so everything is back to normal. But I know many are obsessed with perfection and normality in the end, and that is the opposite of love for people, eventually that has to drop but it takes many years and many people under the thumb who left before an Aqua or Venus in Aqua gets that. By that time he/she is paralyzed and dependent on one person who doesn't love or care, and I have to listen to the complaints! Again confession time.

Better to find someone to be safe with to confess, and to comfort and be comfortered. But you have to pay to play, like the slogan says!

In the end I love Aquas, but not the controlling nature, that's the Taurus being stubborn. With that said I am deeply in love with an Aqua man now, but I don't mind because he and I have other interests, and because he is very non judgemental towards his own needs and others, due to some very hard knocks in life.

Again, air signs have that horrible way of loving the guilt complex around a person, rather than having a direct actual emotion. Sometimes an air sign will think he or she is in love and actually build an entire lie around that person, when that person either does not exist, or never liked him/her in the first place. It's very much so more guilt can be created, more disruption, and more people feel there is an actual emotion happening.

But I can see underneath people, and I know when I am hearing a lie and a fantasy. I refuse to listen to someone tell me in great detail an entire lie made to make him/herself feel better when that person does not know he/she is being used in that way. I know I am being played on to see a real emotion and then that real emotion is used and faked again and again with someone else.

Aquas do like to get people riled up to see what he/she will do, but it's not out of concern for that person's welfare, its' to gather information on how to get someone else to love him/her when that's so sad. No one wants a fake second hand emotion, it has to be personal. Aquas have even asked me what to say to get someone else to like him or her. I can only listen to the guilt, but if the confessions have no solution attached, then am I expected to make things right?

We all have guilt complexes, but I don't like seeing one person play on another person's guilt just get something for a few minutes fun, I won't be confessional unless I get paid.

My Aqua friends do have Taurus therapists, Moms, people like that, but not close friends. Taurus and Aqua have a tough time being close, there are only certain conditions, such as both have other stable romantic relationships, and or if the relationship is sexual, than it's strictly based on comfort and it's not deep. The Aqua eventually starts to talk too much, and the Taurus starts to get too emotional and irritable.

posted January 08, 2005 11:11 AM            

OMG!! Yup... I feel the same way, totally... they just don't get that I'm nuts...

posted January 08, 2005 07:28 PM              

"To give out that power to someone else who will use it and then on top of that hurt me and not respect me because of where it came from, is not friendly, it's more backstabbing."

I feel this is exactly what my taurus guy did to me. But i had a lot of fault in how our situation turned out and your post made me see this. I am so sad.

posted January 08, 2005 08:11 PM              

I think this topic is great.

I'm starting to wonder if I've got a different birthday than what I've always known because this is so me. I haven't been around in a long time, so it's good to be back at LL and seeing you all again. I'm a Sun Scorp, Leo Rising, Cancer Moon. I have Venus and Mars in Virgo.

I so fit the bill though. All emotions except for joy and anger either don't exist for me or they must never be shown. Some situations are okay to express emotions, but it really depends on the situation. I think that it may be my Cancer moon though, since I met a guy with the same cancer moon and he's got Venus in Virgo also, with mars in scorp. Anyway, he has to put on this grumpy old man front but then he does the sweetest things for people so you know it's all crap.

The guy that I'm really smitten about is an Aqua with a Libra Rising, Moon in Aries, Venus in Aqua, and Mars in Pisces. I'm starting to get really frustrated. I'm so detached also and refuse to accept anything except total persuit by the other person that things with us are moving so slowly that a snail would wonder what is taking so long. I do everything. I call him occasionally and have emailed him a couple times but he never responds. When we have talked a few times (I moved across the state from him so that's why that's all the contact we have right now) it was so great, and he told me several times he was glad that I called and that I should call him again. I was thinking, what the hell? You need to call me dude. So anyway, we talk like once a month. He knows that I did like him, and why would I keep in touch then if I didn't still, but I'm wondering if he just wants to be friends because the way that he acts. I hadn't heard from him almost two months, so I emailed him a very short, casual, non-commital email and then ended it with, "If I don't hear from you then I'll assume you're dead." with a smiley face so he knew I was teasing. He wrote me back and it was all formal and a good length. I was shocked! He also wrote, I'm sorry, I did not mean for you to think that i had died." He's so smart and funny, but I had to wonder why he took that comment seriously. Maybe he was playing it safe because if I hadn't been joking then it would have been really rude of him to play it off, but really, who says that when they aren't kidding?

Anyway, so far I've done all the calling and writing. He called me last, but I don't know if it really counts because the day before we had talked and he was drunk and didn't even remember until his roommate told him about it the next morning (whom I've never even met) and he called to have a sober conversation with me. Anyway, I've about had it, but he's really hooked me so I don't know what to do. I'm sending him a card for his birthday and calling him again, and if that doesn't do anything then I'm going to just call him and end it forever because i can't handle these mixed messages, plus my Leo rising hates to be ignored so it kills me that he doesn't give me any attention without me having to fish for it by calling him.

This relationship is just so crappy because we're BOTH remaining detached and playing it safe so it's just not moving anywhere fast.

Well, this thread has really helped me and encouraged me though, because now I know how they really work, as this was my first encounter with a water bearer (and it's fast becoming my favorite sign).

An Aqua woman told me recently that the women and men are very different. The women will move on quickly when a relationship ends, whereas the men will beg. They all hate to be ignored, and they all want their space and freedom but need lots of attention at the same time. They also take forever to lick their wounds and the reason that they take so long to reenter the dating scene is because they are scared of getting hurt again. That feeds my patience a little bit, but it won't last long. Anyone agree or argue this? From what I've read, it sounds like it's pretty much the general agreement.

Take care, hope you're having a 2005 so far!

posted January 08, 2005 08:53 PM              

Define "quickly" lol

posted January 09, 2005 05:50 AM              

Really insightful, thank you - rephrases a lot of the stuff I have felt, deep down, but either couldn't put my finger on, or put into words.

LOL

posted January 09, 2005 01:48 PM              

I did this exact same thing 2 years ago to my best girlfriend (she's aquarian with pisces acendant) but i didn't realize i was doing it until much after. It came up in conversation that she had a really hard time with a breakup (i knew her ex)and i remember she had been trying to get a hold of me. She never said in the messages what it was about, just "call me back". I knew subconsciously what it was about but something held me back from calling her. I always had the feeling that if i don't call back people or show up at things i have been invited to, that i wouldnt be much missed anyways. I HAVE ISSUES!! lol.

I'm working on it. I am not like this anymore or at least not as bad.

posted January 09, 2005 02:30 PM              

I have had very strange, transformational, experiences with Aquarians, men and women that I have posted before, but to sum it up, Aquarians need to be reminded that we are all truly equal in the eyes of God and man, there is no need to prove anything. The order of things is random, that is not determined by individual standards and laws. Logic is murky for that reason and being a superior human is.....being good to other humans...

I have known a few Aquas who get caught up in their own head, and end up needing some kind of medication, or treatment for their anger which gets held inside for so long. Mind games will make you sicker faster than a physical one. That is why I insist all boyfriends from here on in, are happy to get outdoors and DO things, not just talk. I really need that physical competition in a natural way. Chess doesn't count, I'll try and be patient..

This sounds strange but the happiest Aquas I know are confined in someway physically, they prefer to be surrounded by others rather than going out. Even if it means staying home with a drink, there are puzzles and games, and cards. It's good to KNOW this, because for years, I wasted time trying to drag Aquas outdoors, if they do it's because it's to get someplace, not the same thing. Aquas like to play indoors.

So grab your books, cards, and puzzles.

Natasha
Sag Mars conjunct Ascendant
Venus Aries/4th house

posted January 09, 2005 02:43 PM              

Was "Human is" made into a movie? I somehow remember a scene with that kind of dialogue from some film or maybe i have just made this scene up in my mind at this moment. haha

posted January 09, 2005 02:59 PM              

Human Is, that is a short story about a woman who is married to a man who turns out to be an alien.but he is much nicer than her real husband was. When told he's an alien, she says, NO, he's my husband. Human is..being nice to other humans..right?

I don't think they made it into a movie because there's not much action, but that would be great.

Yes Phillip Dick is a master, I have many of his stories. He does write about transformation many times, people who die and come back as apple trees, things like that. Very ahead of his time spiritually.

I am afraid of people never knowing the real me either, but never showing the real you is worse. Pisces people are sometimes afraid no one will ever see the identity, either, but they give up and move on to someone or something else more quickly, or they show off their insecurities to the world.

I think this comes from Capricorn, fear of judgement, separation of self, Aquarius separation of self, and fear of being alone, then Pisces, wanting to merge with others, fear of the merging never happening,

posted January 09, 2005 04:30 PM            

I think that I tend to give advice and comfort, but in the time that I think it will have the most effect and when my head is more clear. So yeah, I often need space but it's not that I don't care. I'm just not mentally there at the moment. Or, I'm completely bummed out and introspective and the particular topic is making it worse. For instance, I've had a crush on a guy for a long time and it's been particularly draining for me. Now that I'm stuggling to move on, my Capricorn friend has just started to get a crush on a guy and I'm seeing a lot of the same worries I had(and still have) coming from her. I'm trying to distract myself and it sure does not help. LOL. But, after taking a break for a day or two, I was ready to talk about everything. My brain is not a fun place that way.

Space? Yup, need space. The only person I really get uppity about space is my mother though. Because I will quietly read a book or do something that I consider important and I feel like she disturbs the force. I'd say basically, my areas of "space" are the computer area and my room. If that's not enough for me, I'll take a walk.

I don't know why anyone would want you to be a doormat, sthenri. I dunno, maybe it's because I've been physically, emotionally and verbally abused most of my life, I really don't think about treating my friends like crap. I really don't like it when people do things for me and I can't return the favor in some way. I like things to be balanced and equal. I guess my Libra aspects have something to do with that, perhaps. I do not know why an Aquarian would backstab you, when we're considered an honest, honorable sign. Maybe a Gemini aspect?

"Strong suns think knowlege is power, and protecting fragility is a must. To give out that power to someone else who will use it and then on top of that hurt me and not respect me because of where it came from, is not friendly, it's more backstabbing. "

I think knowledge is power too, but I also hold myself responsible to use that power wisely. That is also why the only two things that will really make me throw a friendship away is betrayal and manipulation.

Aquarius and jealousy, does not equate. If i ever get jealous for a moment in my life, I realize it and then laugh my butt off.

Nope, dont like public kissing one bit.. I can barely even stand it in movies. That whole, "Let's just slobber all over each other like the mating of the Changelings" thing just makes me gag. I understand what it's like to want to live in the moment. I mean, I was with a Gemini who was even more adverse to PDAs than I was. I'm sure if I could see myself kissing, I'd be disgusted too. I'm sorry, it's enjoyable but it's just not pretty.

Nah, not obsessed with perfection and normality. I rather hate it. I hate having to live up to some expectation that I can't possibly meet. And "normal", mainstream people generally don't spend enough time talking to me for me to really peak an interest, really. I would like to be a bit more grounded, but I find that most people who desire to ground me, desire to change the most essential parts of my personality and character. My hobbies, my religion, my hair. No, no, no.

I don't intentionally cause disruptions, but i cause disruptions nonetheless. It drives me crazy and so I try to fix it. I do know with some of the Aries I know, I find myself unconciously saying something to shock them, then coming back with a clarification because I don't want to scare them off. They have that Mercury in Pisces that makes it so that I'm never really sure what they're thinking because I don't get much feedback. Drives me nutters. I have Mercury in Aqua, in the 1st house. I say what I mean, agressively, but in a weird way.

"Better to find someone to be safe with to confess, and to comfort and be comfortered. But you have to pay to play, like the slogan says!"
I play a lot in the beginning, until I get the strange feeling that the other person is running up a case study. I find I'm better at paying with distraction.

I don't use people, period.

Basically, my problem with Taurus is a basic trend I see. I meet them, I mention something occult and they go, "I don't think you should do that." or something along those lines. I meet a lot of xenophobic Tauruses. So then, that's done with. Or i meet some Tauruses who actually think I'm pretty cool, then they start trying to one up me in every way, going even as far as to tell people they're taller than me when they're two inches shorter. When I do something awesome, they take the credit. When something wrong happens with them, it's always my fault. So in the end, it's as if I'm their mother and they have an electra complex. Take all that I am, assimilate it into themselves and then try to assasinate me in some way. So for me, I try to make it brief. To make matters worse, my sister's a Virgo sun/Taurus moon and I find myself constantly switching hobbies, just to try and keep some part of myself mine. We do have some aspects that help us get along though.

I will agree on the indoors stuff. That's very true. It's especially true in the winter. My birthday's coming up and I can't think of anything I'd want to do outdoors. I still go for walks because it helps me clear my head. Mostly I just go out to see indie bands play. Last birthday, I went to the IMAX to see Matrix Revolutions with my best friend. This time we're thinking about strippers. I'm really not in the mood to see nakie men dancing, but I think at least the shock value would be good for something.

I thnk as an Aquarian, I like to be shocked, even moreso as I get older. I find myself very jaded, so I appreciate it when friends can take it a higher level.