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Topic: Long Distance relationship - Do they work?
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Hey unregistered
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posted May 13, 2008 09:18 PM
Without the touch, no relationship can make it. Unless you're not physical........IP: Logged |
alvarella777 unregistered
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posted May 13, 2008 09:41 PM
Gosh – I just went through such a long distance thing – it took almost a year – and ended in a bad, and totally unclear way.I totally agree with monmonitaa : If you get the chance to know someone and spend time with him/her BEFORE that long distance comes into play ... then there’s a good chance that the relationship will survive. (I’ve experienced that with another serious and long lasting relationship once: We had been together for 1.5 years before we had to go on “long distance” for two years, due to professional reasons – but that was no problem, because before that we had gotten close enough, so that no one and nothing could have come between us.) But if you meet someone from a far way place and the relationship BEGINS with that long distance ... which means that... you can only see each other sporadically... it is VERY hard, in my experience. I am still SO disappointed that my long distance love just failed – we’ve split/gone apart for just 3 weeks now, after almost a year, commuting between two countries. I was oh so serious and sincere about all of it. (I am more the WATER-type, Cancer-Sun, Scorpio-ASC, Sagittarius-Moon, Virgo-Venus). But he .. acted more and more insecure and manipulative and jealous/hysterical some day ... and ice cold on the other (via phone, for instance). Communication via phone or e-mail got more and more messed up, although we managed to meet every other two or three weeks, so: Never very long time-gaps in between. I have the feeling that it was just too much for him – and that we both had a certain obsession for each other (Venus-cj-Pluto in Synastry) and that we haven’t been able to “live” that obsession by just being around each other, talking, having sex etc. It all got spoilt, because the obsession soon turned into suspicion, distrust, frustration and misunderstandings galore!!! I’d clearly say that it was more “his fault” than mine, I guess I was more eager to solve these problems, while he built up more and more facades and more aggressiveness to protect his turf, emotionally. (He is more a FIRE-person, Leo-Sun, Virgo-ASC, Aries-Moon, Libra-Mars) freebird - did we meet THE SAME GUY??? I do know so well what you described here: quote: Imagine guy telling about his ex girlfriend and how they are still togather and consider her to be his sister and then **** her.This all while he tells you that you are his girlfriend.Atlast after all this you come to know he never had ex gf.Insane ! What a liar ? Why all this still no clue ? Probably to get attention.
The same with my Ex-BF from a long distance: Right from the beginning he was building up some „mysteries“ about his life .. which I only discovered later. Most of that was a bit ridiculous, he contradicted himself so often and it was plain to see, quite quickly, that he was just doing this to get attention, to present himself not as a needy/jealous but as an “important”/”dangerous” person ... a typical LEO-vanity-thing, I guess. Struggling for my attention, and he was suspicious that I'd betray him with other guys all the time - although we seldom would have admitted that. At some point it started to hurt me. The fact that he always applied these little “white lies” to get attention, it started to undermine everything and it turned into some weird “Psycho”-competition ... it destroyed everything – even though, in the beginning, I thought I could handle it. After a while I got the feeling that there are at least three different guys I am coping with – one, when we’re physically/geographically together, another one via e-mail and telephone ... and a completely different one, when he is alone. NOT GOOD! I guess I won't enter a long distance-thing again, at least not so quickly and light heartedly as I did.
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comica23 Knowflake Posts: 1212 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 13, 2008 10:17 PM
quote: Do you think it's possible? OR Is it some kind of option and still would be looking for somebody else?
I guess that it depends on the relationship itself. We can react in different ways depending on who/how the other person is. And it also depends on the nature of the relationship. But I think that without some real contact first, it's hard to really know how the other person truly is. For example, you might get an idea about how someone is, but in the real life this person can differ a bit from what you have thought. In the worst case, you might start to idealize about each other just to realize later that it's only illusions. But well, personally I'd prefer someone who can be physically close, as I want to feel that I can always be embraced by the one I love. ^_^ I'd like to hold his hands, caress his face, hug him all the time, and know how he feels by looking into his eyes.
quote: What about the temptation one faces all the time? Can you trust your partner when he is far from you?
There are times that two lovers who are already deeply in love have to separate from each other for some time. I believe that this kind of relationship can still survive, coz when you fall in love with someone deeply and shared so much together, this person would become really unique that you would only want this person. But sometimes this love can become vulnerable as both might feel start to lonely or start to change and have different directions.. If I'd ever have to separate from my bf for some (long?) time, I'd still trust him, since I know how strong his feelings are for me, and I also know that he is a person that would never betray others or cheat on someone he loves (he's serious about his feelings). But what I'd worry is that he might feel lonely or come to meet someone that he's compatible with, and due to the loneliness, he might start to love someone else. IP: Logged |
Lara Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Dec 2011
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posted May 14, 2008 02:16 AM
If it's true love and the people involved are adult and wise, any situation will work. If you truly want to be together, you will find a way.I am in a LDR and it's true love. It's magic when l leave UK to fly to US to visit him. We get so excited and the whole flight i'm dying to see him. We spend a few days ever month together and it's not enough but i'm just so blessed and grateful that even if we only had 1 hour a year together - it's better than having never met. One day we will be together IP: Logged |
Diandra23 unregistered
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posted May 14, 2008 08:01 AM
Lara What a beautiful post!... im in a long-distance too. we live 2hour and a half away from each other and have been together for about 2 Years. It´s not easy.And it´s not for everyone.But possible yes it is. TRUST is a key word - if you dont have it in you neither in your partner,then it´s not worth it. I f you are really In Love with the person - Temptation doesnt exist. What might come between you starts to be the frustraion that sometimes hits you by not being able to be close whenever you need - that´s one of the sacricifes it envolves. IF you have lot of Uranus energies in your charts,makes it easier to cope with distance. It´s true about Cancer - he is a Cancer ASC,and committment is ALL to them.He´s Libra Sun and Aqua Moon. Im Virgo Sun,Taurus Moon,Libra ASC I understand what Monmonitaa said:gets easier if the 2 had some basis together at 1st,but with us it was long-distance already in the beggining.Can exist misunderstandings now and then,but if the two have SURE about their future together and feels "IT MEANT TO BE" , then,the togetherness can happen really quick. With us it was like if we already knew each other since Ancient Times,which makes the expectations higher also. Time passes and the 2 have to think more pratically.But never forcing or pressuring each other to act when one is not ready. Inner Depths you are lucky nly 1 hour away its not that long-distance!I see my John only at weekends,and not always the week after the other.. Battle of Evermore, we kind of share the placements. Sometimes we just see ourselves changing what we thought was our Truth when Loves enters our doors,isnt it? I think there are things we just dont need to fight against:we just live it cause it´s our only Path possible and we do not regret it. Just Yesterday,after days of sad and hungry moods,me and my bf talked and after we conclude that for now we will be keeping the same situation,he said: "i wont give up.I wont unless you say you dont love me anymore,or that you dont want me in your Life". Alvarella, im so sorry for your situation. But dont give up on love.If it´s the right person,then,it´s possible.
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evander Knowflake Posts: 171 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 14, 2008 09:47 AM
i know a scorpio [ac cancer] and a cancer [ac leo] who r in a nice long distance relationship around 14 yrs. so i gues it's possible. they've had breaks though never real break ups. one has venus pluto in leo the other has neptun venus in scorpio. one is the idealist and the other is just obsessed i personally refused to indulge in it[sag sun ac aries] . relationships are hard enough without testing the faith and trust . there's the physical aspect to consider also. IP: Logged |
Lara Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Dec 2011
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posted May 14, 2008 11:29 AM
Thank you Diandra,It's just how l feel. This is the guy that l have all those wondrous aspects with in Draco and Valentine that you, me and DD are so obsessed with lol!!! Uranus - yeah, l have uranus in my 1st house and Aquarius on my 7th cusp. He has uranus conjunct venus so l guess we both are ok with the distance but you are right, when you want to be together and can't it's very very hard. IP: Logged |
Diandra23 unregistered
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posted May 14, 2008 01:52 PM
Lara,i would never guess that the guy with whom you share those amazing aspects were that far away But then again...that proofs that Astrology is like that:shocking and marvellous. Just the Valentine connections you both share would completely swept you away from your feet when you are together. It´s funny - i also started to be interested in astrology when i met my Jonnhy - it was a complete surprise for me to conect instantaneously with someone i didnt knew.. IP: Logged |
Lara Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Dec 2011
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posted May 14, 2008 01:57 PM
Just the Valentine connections you both share would completely swept you away from your feet when you are together.Diandra, Yes, given half a chance they would When l move then we shall see the full impact of our synastry lol!!! We will probably fall deeply in love and never been heard of, nor seen again Your aspects are wonderful too. So happy for you IP: Logged |
Diandra23 unregistered
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posted May 14, 2008 02:08 PM
im a hopeless romantic and to me if a Love Story dont have a little bit of drama or sth different that makes a relationship special,then it has not the same "spice" - must be my Venus and Mars in Leo.."We will probably fall deeply in love and never been heard of, nor seen again" You are already deeply in Love,but yes,in a day to day basis i think the sinastry works stronger and the composite too IP: Logged |
Diandra23 unregistered
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posted May 14, 2008 02:48 PM
eVANDER,14 years in a long distance????Gosh - that must be a REAL LOVE btw...i dont know how they handle that for such a long time It´s nice to know though - makes me feel very happy how much two persons fight for a love like that IP: Logged |
Leo-Cancer98 Knowflake Posts: 1967 From: Toronto,Ontario,Canada Registered: Nov 2014
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posted March 12, 2019 08:58 PM
quote: Originally posted by Sweet Utopia: I won't be able to. I need someone there to cuddle with, talk to, go out with, and kiss and cuddle with some more.
Same. Cancer Rising problems, lol IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 193956 From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted March 13, 2019 10:33 AM
I've never seen one work.IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 193956 From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted March 14, 2019 04:53 PM
I speak from experience.IP: Logged |
kani Knowflake Posts: 1294 From: Registered: Oct 2018
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posted April 13, 2019 10:08 AM
dbIP: Logged |
kani Knowflake Posts: 1294 From: Registered: Oct 2018
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posted April 13, 2019 04:31 PM
quote: Originally posted by Leo-Cancer98: Same. Cancer Rising problems, lol
I'm a Cancer ascendant and I've been in a long distance rl for over 4 years. It works really well for me. A friend of mine has been in one since 2006 and they are still going strong. IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 193956 From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 30, 2019 08:04 AM
quote: Originally posted by kani: I'm a Cancer ascendant and I've been in a long distance rl for over 4 years. It works really well for me. A friend of mine has been in one since 2006 and they are still going strong.
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Randall Webmaster Posts: 193956 From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 15, 2019 11:46 AM
Bump!IP: Logged |
diamondbaby Knowflake Posts: 1009 From: Registered: Jul 2012
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posted May 31, 2019 12:17 PM
I met my husband online (we lived 5200 miles away from each other), we were in a long distance relationship for 1 year, got engaged, then moved together and now we have been happily married for almost 5 years. 😍So yes, long distance relationships can work (I'm not saying that all of them do). IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 193956 From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted June 01, 2019 12:37 PM
quote: Originally posted by diamondbaby: I met my husband online (we lived 5200 miles away from each other), we were in a long distance relationship for 1 year, got engaged, then moved together and now we have been happily married for almost 5 years. 😍So yes, long distance relationships can work (I'm not saying that all of them do).
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ParallelToucan unregistered
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posted June 04, 2019 10:46 PM
Not counting mine out yet, and even if she does, she's full of **** ! haha..... IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 193956 From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted June 15, 2019 06:53 PM
Bump!IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 193956 From: I hold a Juris Doctorate (J.D.) and a Legum Magister (LL.M.)! Registered: Apr 2009
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posted June 20, 2019 08:26 PM
This thread lost posts with the transfer to the new server, so if anyone was affected (i.e., posted after 7:00 p.m. EST yesterday, feel free to re-post).IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 10936 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted June 21, 2019 11:32 AM
Do you guys who have long distance relationships haveMoon/Venus in aspect to Jupiter Moon/Venus in aspect to Neptune Moon/Venus in aspect to Uranus Moon/Venus in 12th Moon/Venus in 9th Moon/Venus in 11th Moon in Sag Moon in Pisces Moon in Aquarius? I am just trying to make a connection here(if any).
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Hydrogenatom Newflake Posts: 21 From: Registered: Feb 2019
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posted July 14, 2019 02:58 PM
Not in my experience. Besides, imo there's something unromantic about meeting someone online (assuming one meets online and not face to face first before doing long distance). It's not a story I'd want to tell my grandkids at any rate.IP: Logged |