Posts: 1440
From: England
Registered: Dec 2004

posted February 14, 2006 06:37 PM         

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Alright, well, I know myself, personally to be a girl with a fondness for utter gits as I am finding out. Despite however attractive I might find a good guy, I REALLY fall for people who are the sort of guys who aren't exactly right for me in ways, who will be able to hurt me without thinking about it. Not neccesarily nasty, but bad, as in, (me and my friends were discussing this) is he a b*stard or a blanket? Everyone has their bad points, but when you come down to it, in a trivial way, would that man be a b*stard (bad boy) or a blanket (good guy)? We haven't thought of anyone we know yet who we can't put in either of these catergories (occasionally both ). But of course, you might know someone who's neither.
Anyway, who do you personally tend to go for? This can be transcribed onto women too of course, bad girls/ good gals... same principle.
Bad guys- Sexy, obviously, hard to get, dynamic, flirty, will take advantage, selfish, good actors (some might seem good!) and mainly, they excite you.
Good guys- Nice , considerate, have self-control and respect, endearing, you love them.... occasionally more like a brother.. ouch.

Ok, that's just my take, but who do you go for?
Ahh, I wish I could like nice guys more. They're so lovely.... but not .... well, they're just not bad. I don't know!

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Posts: 11236
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005

posted February 15, 2006 12:44 AM         

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Oh, that's pretty easy. I like someone who knows when it's appropriate to be bad, and appropriate to be good. I'd cite astrological signs, but that might not be deemed as fair.

You know, thinking about it I'm both myself. I've been seen as either separately as well. It's the good Cap sun with the mischieviously bad Gemini Ascendant.

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Posts: 1440
From: England
Registered: Dec 2004

posted February 15, 2006 08:24 AM         

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Funny you should bring that up AG!

I think the same thing, people are viewed different ways by different people. Who I know and think is a bad guy might actually be seen as good by someone else. I think it rests on who has the control in the relationship... who has more testosterone!

What's everyone think?

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Posts: 2242
From:
Registered: Feb 2003

posted February 15, 2006 10:08 AM         

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I agree with AG. The only thing that can be confusing is just because I don't/do think it's an appropriate time... the other person may not agree.

I like a nice mix of both... not extreme on either side.

The bad guy: Yeah, he's fun to look at... fun to hang out with... but I get bored easy with it all. There isn't much conversation unless it's about him.

The good guy: Will make me melt. If a guy is overly nice (that sounded strange) they do tend to cause me to second guess myself a lot. Which "can" be good. They do tend to worry that they aren't exciting enough sometimes.

I would say for me:

Bad guys: nothing serious... just fun

Good guys: growth... I may not like all of the second guessing, but at times it is healthy.

However, I really have a distaste for someone that takes advantage of others.

I guess now that I think about it... it doesn't matter as long as they have good intentions and their heart is in the right place.
_______________________________________
Scorpio sun, venus, mars, mercury, and uranus
Libra moon, pluto, and asc.

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posted February 15, 2006 10:47 AM           

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If I have to choose and don't take in to account personal nuance?

Good guys, no question.

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Posts: 1158
From:
Registered: Aug 2005

posted February 15, 2006 10:51 AM         

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Posts: 472
From: Leesville, Louisiana
Registered: Sep 2005

posted February 15, 2006 06:48 PM         

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I like bad guys but they have to have some emotions. I don't want an arien ever again. I don't mind if my feelings are hurt some just as long as I know I could hurt his back just as easily. Yet I still don't want him to show his hurt feelings, I just have to know they're there.

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Posts: 2583
From:
Registered: Dec 2004

posted February 16, 2006 08:09 AM         

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good gals , i would say !
i tend to agree with ag to an extent ,though .

goodgals , may be bcos i am more of a personality person rather than being a big one for the beauty .
other important thing, being a cnacer - i have always found it hard to run after gals which is badly required to woo the bad gals type .
i dont like actors , i prefer hundred percent empathetic honesty from the day one from any relation .
last important thing , i have a thing for strong women and i dont think badgals or bad boys have a genuine strength in them .

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Posts: 5158
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted February 16, 2006 10:29 AM         

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Give me a good man any day who can be sweet and generous and responsible.
But let him know how to be a bad boy where it counts. Let him whisper naughty things in my ear in an inappropriate setting.
Make me be naughty after being innocent.
Nothing better than 'the edge' in the eye of a good guy.. it makes it naughtier somehow..... all the components covered.
Like.. 'He said that!?' tingles. Yum.

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Posts: 1108
From: Columbus OH USA
Registered: Aug 2005

posted February 16, 2006 10:58 AM         

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pixel...that would be the guy for me too! Well said!!! They gotta have some spice to em'.. kick it up a notch!

It's kinda the reverse of what they truly want and have a hard time reconciling...
June Cleaver by day... tramp in bed!

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Posts: 1158
From:
Registered: Aug 2005

posted February 16, 2006 04:47 PM         

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Posts: 1226
From: the other side
Registered: Aug 2004

posted February 16, 2006 10:23 PM         

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oh YES, Pix, I totally know what you mean.
And I agree with the various gals who mentioned the best combo being somebody "good" where it counts and "bad" where it's fun.
I sort of have this things for reformed bad boys too.. guys who messed around when they were younger and then straightened out. I don't know- it makes them more multi-dimensional, I like people who have lived a little, messed up, then figured out the way they really want to live. It makes me trust their "goodness" more if they're explored the dark side.

I have this funny thing going on with men- they always seem to see qualities in me that are not there at all- that I tease them, that I'm a heartbreaker, a "badass" so to speak..
it's funny because I'm probably one of the biggest dorks on the planet and all I want is one beautiful sexy and cozy love with one stellar boy- and yet they all thing I'm a femme fatale. I think it's the male imagination making them hope/fantasize that I am like this more so than them actually believing it..*sigh*
boys..

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Posts: 308
From: Canada
Registered: Oct 2005

posted February 16, 2006 11:30 PM         

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If everything is good above the neck, and everything is good below the neck, if she's nice but at the same time has a strong backbone and is fun enough to be with, its a ok with me. Quiet girls = a dead weight. Overly extroverted girls = walking on thin ice.

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Posts: 4496
From: Generic New England City
Registered: May 2003

posted February 17, 2006 12:30 AM         

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Men always settle with good girls, they are friends with bad girls.

Why don't women ever just be friends with the bad boys? If your are living or even married to a good guy, bad ones will always still flirt with you and never go away.

If I chase a guy and he goes away he was good! So I don't chase and that's why bad boys don't like me, no fun.

It's so much better to have a real guy to cuddle than a bad one who runs around!

And in the end bad boys are selfish kissers/huggers.

I dont' date

bad boys, and don't chase tough cookies who can break a little heart like the one in me.

Natasha

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Posts: 1440
From: England
Registered: Dec 2004

posted February 17, 2006 11:16 AM         

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Interesting how many people want the best of both worlds! I personally haven't met a guy who's both yet. Unless he appears nice but you discover he's actually a bit of a git...

Lauren- Heya... I know what you mean, except I attract gits cos I like them! Either way it's probably not good. They don't have to be macho to be bad guys, just not the reliable sweet as sugar type. Dynamic mainly. A scorpio ascendant! haha
But anyway, I'm not a good girl. Not exactly bad but not good... out of the loop maybe, needy even?

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Posts: 351
From: Studio City, CA
Registered: Aug 2005

posted February 17, 2006 12:28 PM         

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Good guys all the way! I'm too empathic to date a bad boy - his character would be too apparent to me, and I'd never be able to trust him. I've had incredibly luck in dating because for me feeling "safe" and being able to trust my partner are so important. As such, I've never even dated a bad boy because I can smell them coming from a mile off. I’ve also found that MOST good boys have a naughty side, especially in the bed room. I’ve only dated one “good guy” (a Sag) that didn’t seem to have an “edge” as Pixie mentioned. All the rest were secretly a bit wicked behind closed doors (or sometimes in public when they think no one is looking : ). Then again I've only dated water and earth signs for the most part so maybe that has something to do with it.

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Posts: 11236
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005

posted February 17, 2006 03:01 PM         

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Posts: 8591
From: former land of the leprechaun
Registered: Sep 2004

posted February 17, 2006 03:20 PM         

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Well in my fantasy.......BOTH !!!

Would always be married to a good bloke,,,no doubts about that, but then I would like to slope off now and then and have wild abandoned sex with a very bad guy......the badder the better....

In my dreams of course....!!!!

HAHA !!!

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Posts: 2583
From:
Registered: Dec 2004

posted February 18, 2006 11:28 AM         

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quote:

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I’ve only dated one “good guy” (a Sag) that didn’t seem to have an “edge” as Pixie mentioned. All the rest were secretly a bit wicked behind closed doors (or sometimes in public when they think no one is looking : ). Then again I've only dated water and earth signs for the most part so maybe that has something to do with it.

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agree!

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Posts: 4975
From:
Registered: Feb 2002

posted February 18, 2006 01:02 PM         

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Anyway, who do you personally tend to go for?

I have Venus in Pisces. Even though I am turning 27 in a couple of months, I relate more to being in the advanced discovery state about who I tend to go for. This is because in the past, men would consciously give an impression of who they think they are. It was hard for me to delineate between that and figuring out what pieces really went where. I've had to develop better ways to pick up clues to find out who the man really was. Lately, I am starting to realize the I probably put more thought into this than most other people in understanding in their dates and why they attract certain vibes.

I think Good and Bad are entirely subjective.

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Posts: 942
From: Antioch, Tennessee, USA
Registered: Jun 2005

posted February 20, 2006 12:04 AM         

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To be totally honest, I don't find people attractive based on their personality "type" (i.e. good boy/girl, bad boy/girl), but rather how they look.

And also...to be totally honest, I'd perpetually try to "fix" a "bad boy" type. So...stay away. Stay far away.

There's this one guy I've liked for a long time. He seems like such a good boy. I found out he smokes pot with this guy who used to be friends with my best friend's ex-boyfriend.

I...don't really talk to him anymore. I know that to date a druggie is to always be second best to the drug. I hate that. I won't do it. Hell, to be friends with a druggie is to be second best to the drug. My best friend used to be addicted to cocaine. I always came AFTER the cocaine.

I kind of feel bad. He looks so sad when I won't talk to him. But, I guess that's just the thing about a Pisces Descendant. The people you're attracted to are never quite how they seem. Or maybe a Pisces Venus? Haha, I don't know.

Being disillusioned sucks.

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Posts: 692
From:
Registered: Mar 2005

posted February 20, 2006 10:00 AM         

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You know, I've found that I could care less if a guy is all good or all bad. I like wacky and crazy guys. (my mars is square uranus)A guy who can make me laugh is in.

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Posts: 160
From: Fort Worth, TX. US
Registered: Mar 2005

posted February 20, 2006 04:48 PM         

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Every good guy has some bad in him, and every bad guy has some good in him.. and a lot of it comes down to what you consider "good" or "bad".

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Posts: 1440
From: England
Registered: Dec 2004

posted February 20, 2006 05:10 PM         

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"There's this one guy I've liked for a long time."

umm..... excuse me for enquiring nove, but I didn't think you were gay.... is this a slip or have I just missed something cos I'm really blunt? Sorry if I'm just being a moron and you've said this countless times... and sorry if I'm being too nosey.

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Posts: 11236
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005

posted February 20, 2006 05:43 PM         

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Yeah, he's gay. He's said it before.

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