posted April 17, 2013 03:36 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Moonfish:
Wow, Idk if someone already pointed this out but...
Sun conjunct Venus and Jupiter
Eros trine Psyche
Amor trine Valentine
Karma and Destinn opposite Vertex

are definite indicators that you guys are soulmates. Just wanna say I've never seen a composite chart this compatible, Congrats!

---

Oh, wow. Someone's actually pointing out the stuff which REALLY boggled my own mind! I feel less crazy. Thank you, Moonfish! I really appreciate that.

I'm not sure where to go beyond that, though. It's most definitely a soul connection; there's tonnes of karma, and it FELT like something we were coming together to do - until it all just unravelled.

I've certainly never felt like anyone the way I have with him. I think that's why I begun wondering ... could it be possible - that the reason for ALL of this reality-bending phenomena, the coincidence of creating a story which heavily features the dynamics of twin souls from a particular soul group having to undergo all the crazy trials of balancing their own and collective karma - could it actually be possible that he's a big part of that - outside of being the one who helped me create it - without whom it wouldn't be in existence, I mean.

That somehow, underneath it all, it's less of just a story, and a weird blueprint of our own past? Our future?

Thing is ... it's easier when you're writing it. You're in control there. Here? No. Not so much.

So I just don't know what to believe. But our composite really does floor me. I thought it was just me! I'm relieved to see it's not.

-A.

posted April 17, 2013 04:21 AM            

Whatever this is, it is deep transformative stuff.

posted April 17, 2013 11:07 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ceridwen:
Your composite also has conjunction of 7th house and 8th house ruler. In 1st house. From Scorpio to Sag. Also being parallel each other.

Whatever this is, it is deep transformative stuff.

(I am big on connections of 7th to 1st or 8th; and of 8th to 2nd or 7th)

---

Now THAT I didn't see. And, oh, God, does that make sense. He'd changed my concept of reality. That's not easy! Prior to him, I'd been a spectator of things 'paranormal'. I'd never REALLY had them happen to me - in ways I simply could not explain. Like the temporal paradox. I'm STILL trying to wrap my brain around that one.

I wonder if I hadn't noticed this because the corrected composite (for his correct birth time) is still new to me. In either case, wow. I'll say when his ASC became 00º Aquarius, and RIGHT on my VX, (with my VX being a few degrees off of his) and my Venus went into his 7H, and my Sun into his 8H ... yeah. It was an 'a-ha!' experience.

There are times he'd compared us to a couple of characters from the Battlestar Galactica remake - Gaius Baltar and 'Head Six' as she was called. Namely, she's always the voice in his head - or literally appearing to him, usually telling him everything he's doing wrong. Needless to say, they had a contentious, volatile, yet deeply loving relationship. Two of my favourite characters, brilliantly played by James Callis and Tricia Helfer. I digress.

Naturally, she goes away at some point - sick of being made to feel like all she is is an annoyance. (SO been there.) And, for the moment, he's relieved. Does stupid things. Pretends not to care. Does. And, things turn out right again.

If only writers really had this much control over reality. (She said, ironically to herself, upon beginning her quantum physics homework.)

posted April 18, 2013 12:55 AM            

Are you able to locate it? I apologise that it's just the chart. I can grab the degrees down to the minute.

posted April 19, 2013 01:59 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by dyedye08:
@ Ras him and I are both rabbits

---

posted April 19, 2013 02:23 PM            

I wonder if sometimes things happen as well, especially internally, if something triggers the degrees of about 29 Cap to 9 Aquarius and Leo. Or if you maybe have natal planets there.

The 5 degree Aquarius might be extra significant with your composite Sun being there, and I kind of think the Sabian is fitting:

A Masked Figure Performs Ritualistic Acts In A Mystery Play

Especially knowing you are writers!

The Sabian of the antiscion of the pluto-is interesting as well (and with Pluto ruler of the whole chart, and both being in the 12th house...)

Pluto:
Petrified Tree Trunks Lie Broken On Desert Sand
(it always evokes the feeling of a VERY ancient connection to me. Yes they are broken in the desert, but they are still there, the sands of time did not erase them, but conserved them)

Lachesis is on the antiscion of 15 Leo:
The Storm Ended, All Nature Rejoices In Brilliant Sunshine

Mercury is very important here, as it is the ruler of the 8th house (no other house spells soulmates as clearly as this one; being a water house it is symbolic of the soul or emotions; being in the relationship quadrant, it is about relating; and being the fixed house, it is indicative of longterm consequences).

The sabian of Mercury`s degree is:
Retired Army Veterans Gather To Reawaken Old Memories

The antiscion degree though has a pretty powerful sabian
A Secret Meeting Of Men Responsible For Executive Decisions In World Affairs

Seeing it is also ruler of the 10th house, this might be part of you "mission".
And you do it through Mercury, writing perhaps.

Also the Saturn-Pluto-conjunction falls onto the contrascion of your Midheaven! Wow!
Whatever you have to process with him, whatever karmic business you are to finish, it is definitely impacting the overall worldly purpose of your relationship and what becomes public.

The sabian for 1 Virgo

A Large White Cross Dominates The Landscape

and the corresponding one 28 Aries:
The Music Of The Spheres

and of course 28 Libra
Mankind's Vast And Enduring Effort To Reach For Knowledge Transferable From Generation To Generation

posted April 19, 2013 02:49 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
How're you faring, RAS? I know things were rough a few days ago. I hope they're smoothing out.

---

posted April 19, 2013 02:52 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
BTW, you're a Monkey, DD.

---

posted April 19, 2013 09:12 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ceridwen:

Also, did you see how many parallels there are? Actually these are occultations or planetary ecclipses, since the planets are also conjunct. I believe the reason a wide aspect might sometimes be felt probably is caused by the declinational aspect happening at the same time.
Though the strongest would be if both were in tight orb.

---

Ohhh, yes. And I agree with you entirely. My choices of which aspects are truly active / valid may often seem arbitrary, but that's because if it's wide and they're PLL, I count it. (Especially if there's a DW going on.)

quote:

---

I wonder if sometimes things happen as well, especially internally, if something triggers the degrees of about 29 Cap to 9 Aquarius and Leo. Or if you maybe have natal planets there.

---

I'm definitely going to investigate that. It DOES seem the more volatile periods are during January and before Valentine's Day. Things have been known to get intense in late summer. Last year, it was most of the latter half of July, so that would actually correspond. Are you getting this from the ant / con points? (And, I just checked: the roughest day thus far, 16-17 Jan, the Sun was at 27º Cap. Admittedly, the next 10 days were HELL. HE-E-E-E-ELL.)

quote:

---

The 5 degree Aquarius might be extra significant with your composite Sun being there, and I kind of think the Sabian is fitting:

A Masked Figure Performs Ritualistic Acts In A Mystery Play

Especially knowing you are writers!

---

Oh, absolutely. No to mention the whole first 6 years of the relationship. All that Psyche/Eros interplay. Amazing how that becomes so literal in the Internet Age. 'Make him tell you who he is!' 'I can't! I - I'll lose him!' 'What? Why?' 'I don't know! Trust me. I will. I can't!' And on and on it went.

quote:

---

The Sabian of the antiscion of the pluto-is interesting as well (and with Pluto ruler of the whole chart, and both being in the 12th house...)

Pluto:
Petrified Tree Trunks Lie Broken On Desert Sand
(it always evokes the feeling of a VERY ancient connection to me. Yes they are broken in the desert, but they are still there, the sands of time did not erase them, but conserved them)

---

Wow. 3º PI is my Telephus=Eros/Psyche. No joke!

That certainly does hit home. I've taken so many hits for sticking through this with him, (once, he'd actually thanked me for it). It'd be wonderful to know we're just 'weathered' and 'stronger'.

quote:

---

Lachesis is on the antiscion of 15 Leo:
The Storm Ended, All Nature Rejoices In Brilliant Sunshine

---

I'm all for that!

quote:

---

Mercury is very important here, as it is the ruler of the 8th house (no other house spells soulmates as clearly as this one; being a water house it is symbolic of the soul or emotions; being in the relationship quadrant, it is about relating; and being the fixed house, it is indicative of longterm consequences).

---

I was JUST thinking of that this morning! I hadn't even thought of it as being the 8R, and then, bam - it hit me.

quote:

---

The sabian of Mercury`s degree is:
Retired Army Veterans Gather To Reawaken Old Memories

The antiscion degree though has a pretty powerful sabian
A Secret Meeting Of Men Responsible For Executive Decisions In World Affairs

Seeing it is also ruler of the 10th house, this might be part of you "mission".
And you do it through Mercury, writing perhaps.

---

Wow, now THAT is spooky - considering the story - the dream it came from, and the fact that SO much of it HAS been revealed to be all over our astrology.

quote:

---

Also the Saturn-Pluto-conjunction falls onto the contrascion of your Midheaven! Wow!
Whatever you have to process with him, whatever karmic business you are to finish, it is definitely impacting the overall worldly purpose of your relationship and what becomes public.

---

Holy - that just knocked me out of my chair AND made my day. That's why it's been so infuriating ... this feeling that we DO need to get this story out there; that it impacts so many, who are especially unaware. To demystify it, treat it with all deserving respect, and, of course, tell a damned good, entertaining story that really makes you think. AND feel. I've been so lucky to come into the talent I have - and he's definitely included. It felt very much like LACHESIS is a strange culmination of my karmic past, which came into being with him. (It's no surprise the asteroid is all over our charts.)

quote:

---

The sabian for 1 Virgo

A Large White Cross Dominates The Landscape

and the corresponding one 28 Aries:
The Music Of The Spheres

and of course 28 Libra
Mankind's Vast And Enduring Effort To Reach For Knowledge Transferable From Generation To Generation

---

Yes, yes, YES! Man, Ceri. You're helping me feel sane again!

Incidentally, he called yesterday. I was nursing an absolutely horrendous migraine, so I didn't answer - not in THAT circumstance. He's been ill (just a cold) and working a lot and yadda-yadda, and 'that's why he's been out of touch'. Uhh huuuuuh.

I decided I'll wait until he calls me back ... (I'm sure now that he will) and in the meantime, send him the most updated outline ... asking how his show went yesterday. Or ... maybe just saying that I hope his show went well. (I'd already wished him good luck. In text. Good enough.) We'll see how brave I am then. Not like I haven't been busy, too! Getting enlightened, apparently.

posted April 19, 2013 09:14 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by RunAroundScreaming:
Lol so what are the real chinese signs. Hadnt DD put another birth year for the TF, too?

---

Nah, he's still '63. I ... think.

Damn, I swear, if he's not, I'm gonna cry 'Uncle!' on this one. That was already a lot of work for a non-relevant chart.

posted April 20, 2013 01:21 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by dyedye08:
@ Indigio his birth year is 63. Today was not a good day, thought about him a lot today he just kept creeping up into my thoughts. How long did you and your soulmate go without talking?

---

I'm sorry, DD. And, regarding mine, it's more like how long did we actually spend talking. In the beginning, when he was hiding so much from me, (like, uh, his identity - not kidding) there would be periods of days where we wouldn't be in contact. It gradually lessened.

When I moved, I actually feel really, really horrible. Looking back, I treated him so badly. I did. I was so angry at our not meeting, on his continuing to lie, so determined to let go and move on ... I did a good job of it. For awhile. He was getting a solid taste of his own medicine, too. He'd even said, 'It's like you're coming through satellite. Everything you say is on a five-minute delay,' and then, 'Now I know what it must feel like to talk to me all the time.' It would be another few months before he'd suddenly tell me he loved me. And, of course, now denies it entirely. Of course. Convenient, his 'memory lapses'.

Things really didn't change until January 2012, and boy, did they change. It happened suddenly, too. (Ah, Uranus.) We were snarking at each other in text, as per usual, (it's like breathing to us, even still) and he made the excuse that I was 'hinting for him to call'. (I wasn't.) This was ... maybe a few days after we'd seen each other / 'met' for the first time in full honesty. I missed that one, but grabbed the next. Then we'd get into this routine of my missing his calls, he'd leave me the most hilarious voicemails, (I mean, he's a professional comic - who, incidentally, has been so ... unfunny lately, and, oh, man, does that drag on him - anyway) and I'd answer the next one. I think I probably called him a total of 7 times. He called me ... about a hundred? I think?

Our phone calls ... were something else. As I've said before, we'd average 3.5 hours a night. Straight. It was impossible to run out of things to say, because we were either RIGHT there with each other mentally (if that makes sense) and we could talk about anything. Anything. That's what had been so bizarre about our relationship. For all its deception, it was the most honest one I think I'd ever had. He was trying so hard to be truly transparent with me - making up for the past. (He'd even said so.) AUGH. Damn it. Now you're going to make me ... sad ... again. Nostalgic. Argh, too late. Anyway.

It was incredible. We got so much work done; it was the highlight of my day. I was honestly so stupidly and deliriously happy that I quashed it out of guilt. And now I don't know if I'll ever get it back. Or ... if it was worth it. Thinking back now, remembering the good times I swear I'd forgotten ... I don't think I acted in my best interest at all. Others, maybe. Mine? No.

After November, our communication died. It's never been the same, really, since July, but it'd have fits and starts. I guess, when we were on, we were en fuego. When we're off ... it's dead. Desolate. Or there are just bits.

Anyone know 'The Newsroom' on HBO? McAvoy and McHale? That's us. That's so us it's SCARY. (And my character is British, heh.) Anyhow.

He's always taking potshots. He'll actually construct scenarios to incite my jealousy. Never real ones. He never actually dates. Hell if I know the occasional hookup was even real - or just to stick it to me. February, he actually admitted it. I was so stunned, I asked him if he honestly thought that was normal. (And he calls me the crazy one.) He laughed, thought about it, and said, 'No ... but it worked.' Augh! I said, 'That's beside the point and you know it. Do you think you're owed this, or something? Do you think I OWE you that you can DO this to me?' He said, 'No ... not exactly.' When I pressed, as usual, he said that he had to go, and he'd call me back.

He knows I don't deserve it, but I swear, he doesn't know how to stop, either. His pain is SO strong, his depression SO intense, his belief that I've betrayed him so badly that ... I swear, he just can't let it go.

Sigh.

Welcome to Pluto. (Having an almost-all-Scorpio composite counts as a LOT of it.) Plus, we have a LOT of Pluto aspects. Mutual ones, too. Yeesh.

So, in true Plutonian form, it's heaven or hell. He's either lashing out at me or pretending as if he's too busy to bother with me - and in the same breath, accuse me of the same disregard.

Does that ... help? Heh.

This last bout was 8 days. Long for us, actually, to go without a word in ANY form - ANY communication. We'd text, if we weren't talking. This time it was just ... nothing. (He now claims it was his being ill (we frequently get sick almost at the same time, too; it's pretty spooky) and working the 45+ hours at his new job; of course, he was apologetic, sincerely, only to add that he wasn't really all that apologetic ... considering I never bothered to answer the phone. (Oh, boy.)

I realise all the pain he's suffering on so many levels; I also FEEL it myself. And I miss the good times.

It's just ... hard. But I'm going to keep trying. Slowly, and the right way.

posted April 20, 2013 11:36 AM            

"My choices of which aspects are truly active / valid may often seem arbitrary, but that's because if it's wide and they're PLL, I count it. (Especially if there's a DW going on.)"
Well, I am still hesitant with TOO generous orbs, but I think it is important to see the pattern behind it.
However, there will be exact aspects with people who vry strongly push our buttons; just it maybe do not have to be longitudinal aspects alone. Could be a parallel, or antiscion as well.

" Are you getting this from the ant / con points?"
Yes.

" (And, I just checked: the roughest day thus far, 16-17 Jan, the Sun was at 27º Cap. Admittedly, the next 10 days were HELL. HE-E-E-E-ELL.)"

this relates to 3 Sag and Gemini as antiscion-axis. (and moving backwards from there). For example the tr Sun at 2 Aquarius would relate to 28 Scorpio as antiscion. As you can see the Tr Sun was casting its shadow / antiscion on all your SCorpio planets in composite and thus pulling the rug away under your feet to bring up what had been placed underneath there!
The intensity is sometimes too much to bear for mere mortals.

I was for the first time having a look at our antiscion composite, and I was gobsmacked how much it relates to my natal chart.

For example composite MOon is exactly on the antiscion of my natal ASC, and 2 degrees off the antiscion of Mars and Neptune.
Does that mean the emotional aspect of this connection digs up the internal workings of Mars-Neptune-ASC for me?
At the time we met Tr Jupiter was on the exact same degree as composite Moon and my antiscion ASC.
22 Capricorn.

Funnily though, the other way round it was even more intense. Meaning how the transits were lighting up the links of my natal to the composite antiscion chart.
of course the links between composite and natal stay the same, just that they are taking place on different degrees, thus the transits are interacting with them differently.

I mean this.
my antiscion ASC is 22 Cap; the place of the normal composite Moon.

now my normal ASC is 7 Sag, which is the antiscion Moon of the composite. You see what I mean?
In this case does that mean that below the surface there is a 7 degree Sag Moon? Coming under the guise of Cap Moon?
And what does it mean that my straight Sag ASC is pulling at the deeper soul reflection of the composite MOon`?

I am asking htis cause at the time of first meeting Tr ASC was 9 Sag. of course it was also conjunct my usual Nptune-NN, and tha does make sense, but did the antiscion composite Moon also start to hum with that frequency? Like an overtone or something like that?

the transiting MOon and Pluto was also on the antiscion of composite Sun and consequently his antiscion Sun-Moon-conjunction (on my Vesta btw).

what sleeping dogs did I unknowingly rouse?
(actually that is probably a pretty fitting imagery of antiscion: sleeping dogs. Anything you have stuffed away in the dark dusty corners in your subconsciousness and soul, that you don´t really dare to look at. Probably that which maks us feel the thrill of watching ahorror movie, a tremendum fascinans).

"Wow. 3º PI is my Telephus=Eros/Psyche. No joke!"
That is huge!

"
I was JUST thinking of that this morning! I hadn't even thought of it as being the 8R, and then, bam - it hit me."
No kidding.

I`ve been sneaking around that thought now and then, but it was only last week that it hit me with total clarity.
And the synastries I checked showed that over and over again, the connection of 8th house to especially 1st and 2nd house, but also 7th house.

§
Holy - that just knocked me out of my chair AND made my day. That's why it's been so infuriating ... this feeling that we DO need to get this story out there; that it impacts so many, who are especially unaware. To demystify it, treat it with all deserving respect, and, of course, tell a damned good, entertaining story that really makes you think. AND feel."
Yes, thatw as the impression I got from that.

"Yes, yes, YES! Man, Ceri. You're helping me feel sane again!"

"Incidentally, he called yesterday"
I am not surprised actually.

"I was nursing an absolutely horrendous migraine, so I didn't answer - not in THAT circumstance. He's been ill "
Yes. Not surprised either.
This seems to happen. a lot.

I hope you can return to an open communication basis.

posted April 20, 2013 11:55 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:

I'm glad that you're talking again! He actually called me yesterday, too. Something in the air, huh?

---

posted April 20, 2013 12:03 PM            

"When the earth was still flat,
And the clouds made of fire,
And mountains stretched up to the sky,
Sometimes higher,
Folks roamed the earth
Like big rolling kegs.
They had two sets of arms.
They had two sets of legs.
They had two faces peering
Out of one giant head
So they could watch all around them
As they talked; while they read.
And they never knew nothing of love.
It was before the origin of love.

The origin of love

And there were three sexes then,
One that looked like two men
Glued up back to back,
Called the children of the sun.
And similar in shape and girth
Were the children of the earth.
They looked like two girls
Rolled up in one.
And the children of the moon
Were like a fork shoved on a spoon.
They were part sun, part earth
Part daughter, part son.

The origin of love

Now the gods grew quite scared
Of our strength and defiance
And Thor said,
"I'm gonna kill them all
With my hammer,
Like I killed the giants."
And Zeus said, "No,
You better let me
Use my lightening, like scissors,
Like I cut the legs off the whales
And dinosaurs into lizards."
Then he grabbed up some bolts
And he let out a laugh,
Said, "I'll split them right down the middle.
Gonna cut them right up in half."
And then storm clouds gathered above
Into great balls of fire

And then fire shot down
From the sky in bolts
Like shining blades
Of a knife.
And it ripped
Right through the flesh
Of the children of the sun
And the moon
And the earth.
And some Indian god
Sewed the wound up into a hole,
Pulled it round to our belly
To remind us of the price we pay.
And Osiris and the gods of the Nile
Gathered up a big storm
To blow a hurricane,
To scatter us away,
In a flood of wind and rain,
And a sea of tidal waves,
To wash us all away,
And if we don't behave
They'll cut us down again
And we'll be hopping round on one foot
And looking through one eye.

Last time I saw you
We had just split in two.
You were looking at me.
I was looking at you.
You had a way so familiar,
But I could not recognize,
Cause you had blood on your face;
I had blood in my eyes.
But I could swear by your expression
That the pain down in your soul
Was the same as the one down in mine.
That's the pain,
Cuts a straight line
Down through the heart;
We called it love.
So we wrapped our arms around each other,
Trying to shove ourselves back together.
We were making love,
Making love.
It was a cold dark evening,
Such a long time ago,
When by the mighty hand of Jove,
It was the sad story
How we became
Lonely two-legged creatures,
It's the story of
The origin of love.
That's the origin of love."
http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/hedwigandtheangryinch/originoflove.htm