posted September 03, 2014 01:07 PM            

We have all had that guy we were sprung on that didn't give us the time of day! Maybe you were 14, maybe you were 52 but it happens. You get caught up in the fantasy and wham! Game over, lights out go put your heart in a blender run it on the highest level.

When I was 13 I cried because Orlando Bloom wasn't in love with me...hell, I'd probably cry now if I really gave a lot of thought to how JJ Watt isn't my husband...

posted September 03, 2014 01:21 PM            

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Originally posted by happyaskings:
Some of ya'll need to ease up on being a Judgy Judy!

We have all had that guy we were sprung on that didn't give us the time of day! Maybe you were 14, maybe you were 52 but it happens. You get caught up in the fantasy and wham! Game over, lights out go put your heart in a blender run it on the highest level.

When I was 13 I cried because Orlando Bloom wasn't in love with me...hell, I'd probably cry now if I really gave a lot of thought to how JJ Watt isn't my husband...

Fairy, you go out and get you some TLC! Pamper yourself! Get a rebound, have fun!

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I wasn't trying to be a Judge Judy. I'm just telling it like it is.

posted September 03, 2014 01:31 PM            

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Originally posted by MineAgain:
I wasn't trying to be a Judge Judy. I'm just telling it like it is.

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posted September 03, 2014 02:35 PM            

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Originally posted by happyaskings:
I understand, and I do agree with you on the God doing you a favor. I liked the what you said "A man's rejection is God's protection" thats gonna stick with me.
Still, it can be very easy for some people to emotionally attach particularly when they feel alone. There were some comments made that seemed like people were invalidating her feelings and that just makes the situation worse. She needs support right now, tough love can wait a week.

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posted September 03, 2014 03:20 PM            

@happy - I agree about the call for support. For me, tough love is something that has NEVER worked. We're all different, and are motivated differently - so while it may work wonders for some of us, for others it can have quite the opposite effect.

When it comes down to it, I think all of us post our experiences, advice and comments with good intentions. This forum has helped me loads and I truly do care to hear updates about how everyone is doing. I certainly wouldn't want anyone to feel nervous or apprehensive about posting (whether that be about getting another reading or about a personal issue). Within this space we have so many different backgrounds, ages, experiences and perspectives that hearing the differing opinions is like a valuable resource - at least that's how I look at it.

posted September 03, 2014 04:45 PM            

both of you ladies are correct in your evaluation.

it's important to get the tough love advice that mineagain gave and equally important to know what happyaskings was saying, that many people have been there getting hopelessly attached to someone. There's no need to beat yourself up over it.

I've been on both sides of the coin. I've gotten attached to people, wasn't able to let go, and felt like a real piece of **** when I was rejected (very harshly at times). I beat myself up over it and probably made myself feel worse than the guy did.

I've also done some rejecting, in some instances it was almost a game to me, but I didn't want the other person to feel bad about themself. Well, that was true in one case.

posted September 03, 2014 05:02 PM            

In my opinion, people would do themselves a huge favor if they were to stop throwing themselves pity parties. I was the queen of pity parties a couple of months ago but one day I woke up and told myself: "No one can have the power to hurt me. Who are they to hurt me?".

At some point, you have to understand that sometimes, your own thinking make the situation far worse than it actually is. Throwing yourself pity parties just keeps dragging the issue. It's not helping. I'm all for being sensitive but sometimes, you have to be harsh. Life is tough, people are selfish, emotions are rarely taken into consideration. You gotta toughen up, especially if you want to try online dating. As a matter of fact, we could all use some work to get a thicker skin. We're all a work in progress.

I'm sorry, but telling FairyDust "I'm so sorry, he's a jerk yaddi yadda" works at first but there's a point in life when you can't keep holding on to something that vanished a while back. Only tough love can open your eyes when you can't seem to wake up.

I've learned from my mistakes and I am therefore not trying to be harsh on anyone. I'm not playing mean girl or Judge Judy. I'm being realistic. You have to understand that you can't hold on to someone who clearly does not want you to be a part of their life! You gotta pick yourself up and have a "screw it" attitude. That's life.

When you give so much power to a stranger, of course you're only going to hurt. You shouldn't give the power to anyone to hurt you. Build a shield and believe that no one has this power over you. You're the one holding all the power here. You have the power to make yourself feel vulnerable or act like a "victim" or empower yourself and let it go because it's not worth it. You're only a victim if you want to (not in all instances of course, in cases like this, you clearly are triggering your own "victimization").

I was rejected terribly by some man and that's why I want to us tough love! You hold all the power, not him girly. If you give such power to people, then you're always going to hurt. It's not how it's supposed to be. You dictate the rules and you can't let some random hurt you like that. They're no one.

Lord, if someone had written something like this while I was hurting, I would have told me "Screw you, you insensitive pratt". But in hindsight, it's the advice I would have given to myself when I got rejected multiple times by the same guy like I was some kind of piece of disgusting meat. You're hurting while the other person doesn't even remember who the hell you are. Do you think they'd care? No, hun. Why do you care so much about someone who obviously doesn't care about you?

posted September 03, 2014 05:05 PM            

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Originally posted by FairyDust75:
Hey LL Friends, just came on to say I'm doing ok. It is even more safe to say it's most likely done with A. He denied my friend request on FB. I was just on and I noticed it says on his page "send friend request" instead of "friend request sent." So right there it's confirmation that he truly doesn't want me in his life. I'm taking my cue from that and bowing out. I won't ever try and text him again nor would I send another friend request. That would just be stupid. But it is safe for me to say all of those readers who predicted him coming back and me having some sort of relationship with him were completely wrong. It's just not going to happen at this point. But I'm ok. I'll bounce back completely and move on. Someone on here said something about how ridiculous it was to get attached to someone you don't know or met on line and only knew for a short time. I guess it happens to me because I truly am lonely when it comes to love. I guess I've been waiting for that one person to come along for so long that I tend to fall too quickly. But I at least have my answer to the question of will he or won't he. He cut the tie and is obviously done. I wish him well and I will move on from this.

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I'm sorry to hear that Fairy . I was in your shoes many years ago..mine took many years to fully get over with though. Not sure why I let my imagination wander/soar so much with that person, but I'm so happy I am over it. But it took almost over 9 years - yep, almost the same length of time I was involved with the father of my kids - to fully get over that person. So I def. hope you DON'T get caught up like I did. We met online, but had common friends offline. We went to the same middle school, and my best friend in elementary school had a crush on him (she didn't want to fully admit it, but I could feel it at the time, but she had a bf - and the feeling was mutual from his part. May she RIP). But yes we liked each other, but I "ran away" from him - he made me feel like no other person and it was just very scary for me to deal with that intensity at the time (I guess I like calling it "love/crush at first sight")

We first got to talk online even though we have seen each other in real life, and she kept telling me he liked me or something - but I didn't really like him at the time. When we first started talking online I felt instantly attracted to him..I never felt like that before. It was very intense and just weird for me..I felt very, very scared and I couldn't handle it, so I just acted nonchalant with him. OMg it's just a very long, drastic "sad" "tragic" story that takes too long to explain..but fast forward today and here I am reading cards. So I took my personal experience and turned it from a negative to a positive. But all I am saying is cheer up..he may simply just not be "THE ONE" and you have someone much better waiting for you in your future =)

I do have Venus in Libra in 8th house sextile Uranus in sagittarius 10th house..I guess that's what makes me act "Crazy in love" with certain men.

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“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets."

Tarot Readings by Me

Facebook - ReadingsbyAzul

Baby Yaga <3

posted September 03, 2014 05:25 PM            

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Originally posted by FairyDust75:
Thanks for sharing Empress. I guess I hung onto it because I did feel like there was a connection. I felt that spark. But I know I'll move past it. I was given the closure. It took me forever to get over P because I never had that closure. But A did give me the closure so I know how he feels about me and what he wants. He just doesn't want me. It's ok though. I hope someone new comes along soon. I'm willing to wait for the right one to come. Just hope they do. My track record isn't good.

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AWWW FD I'm just glad to see that you're dealing so well with this. It seems like it anyway. I have gotten so freaking depressed over this kind of thing, scary depressed and I don't like to see that happen to others.

posted September 03, 2014 05:30 PM            

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Originally posted by St@r2013:
I hope you deleted his number Fairy (but I have a feeling you haven't) - I once asked my friend if I can give her the number of my ex so I can see if he blocked me on whatsapp (he did) and she asked me why do I still have his number ... I replied, just because... she said there is no reason for my to ever have that number and made me delete it ... there's no going back after that.

Delete his number, another step to ending this and moving forward.

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posted September 03, 2014 05:36 PM            

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Originally posted by Damali:
Empress, why do you have that baby yaga thing in your siggy. I finally clicked it today. It was kind of creepy

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posted September 03, 2014 05:41 PM            

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Originally posted by FairyDust75:
But it is safe for me to say all of those readers who predicted him coming back and me having some sort of relationship with him were completely wrong. It's just not going to happen at this point.

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posted September 03, 2014 05:46 PM              

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Originally posted by lilacbreeze:
This is what is so confusing! I remember you saying how all of these readers were able to accurate describe your current / past with whoever you were asking about. How / WHY are the future predictions completely wrong?? Have you thought about contacting the readers to tell them just how incredibly wrong they were? I definitely would.

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I don't get it either. How could they see any sort of relationship given what's happened. I did contact two of the readers that were adamant about it. They are saying "well he's a jerk but he will come back around." I don't believe it for a second. I just can't. They were sympathetic but say they still see him reaching out. I even told them about the fb thing and they still feel he's reaching out again. I think if that does happen my hair will all fall out and it will rain blood. But yes they were correct about the entire situation personalities and everything. Even all of the gory intimidate details.

posted September 03, 2014 06:18 PM            

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Originally posted by PSYCHE:
my friends reading from estrealla i read it tonight and its remarkably similar to mine!!!!

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posted September 03, 2014 06:18 PM            

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Originally posted by FairyDust75:
I don't get it either. How could they see any sort of relationship given what's happened. I did contact two of the readers that were adamant about it. They are saying "well he's a jerk but he will come back around." I don't believe it for a second. I just can't. They were sympathetic but say they still see him reaching out. I even told them about the fb thing and they still feel he's reaching out again. I think if that does happen my hair will all fall out and it will rain blood. But yes they were correct about the entire situation personalities and everything. Even all of the gory intimidate details.

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