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Author
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Topic: Have you guys ever used a psychic service? Part 3
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peacefulclouds
Knowflake Posts: 1301
From: somewhere in south and the east
Registered: Jan 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 01:05 PM
  
Fairy,Take a breath, this is just regular dating advice- sorry if unsolicited, but I think you're going back into your old pattern... If a guy doesn't text you back (like how r us) don't text him again especially if you guys are new meets. An interested person will keep up communication even if they're busy, even if short text. See it this way: would you do that kinda thing to someone you care? Don't give them too much care, you should care about yourself more. They're the ones are missing out, not you.
You should try finding more options (dating site) to avoid focusing only on one guy :/ else you will get addicted to psychic readings again wanting to know about contact. Try to have several options at once if can, you found S, you can find more guys for sure.
Xoxo IP: Logged |
FairyDust75
Knowflake Posts: 2192
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 01:09 PM
I know I know. I have a hard time though focusing on more than one person at a time. And I totally agree if someone is interested or cares they would answer in some way shape or form. I'm so terrible at this it's not even funny. IP: Logged |
peacefulclouds
Knowflake Posts: 1301
From: somewhere in south and the east
Registered: Jan 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 01:17 PM
The reason I got off dating scene for years is because most people are jerks, and I don't have the patience to keep up with the games since I see through them most of the time (moon in scorp)If you're dating women, it's a diff story lol but there's truth in men generally like the chase- but not all because of game, more like by letting them make moves it shows (to them) you're in control of your own wants and needs, a 'together' woman (dunno where this kinda thing came from) and it makes them want to be part of your life (a challenge, a bit) Cause everyone is insecure and want anchor, and they seek women who can be that (or at least appears to be, like confident, expressful etc). So by making a lot of moves, these men will think you need THEM, to soon, so they leave... Sucks but that's how general dating scene is. Open yourself for more options please  sorry if too interfering IP: Logged |
FairyDust75
Knowflake Posts: 2192
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 01:36 PM
You're not interferring at all! Just when i think I have men figured it out they change the rules. I totally thought I was playing it cool this time. Minimal texting first, letting him make the moves etc. It seemed to have worked for awhile and after we met he told me he wanted to see me again. That has yet to happen. The communication slowed down some but it was still going. If I text him he would answer. Now it seems he's stopped totally. I totally learned my lesson with A and I'm not going to continue to try to reach out. I sent the merry christmas thing and I would like him to respond but I won't text again after today unless he texts first. I can't go through that again. I really only joined again on a whim and sort of at the advice of AV. Who felt strongly I would meet someone within the first 7 days. She was totally right about that. I was curious to see if it would have happened anyway. And I know some people will say well of course you would have met someone. Not necessarily. I've been on tons of dating sites and didn't meet a soul in the first month, not even a message from someone, whether I initiated or not. Her prediction (AV) was that he would be steady, but slow. Not committed now, not 100% sure what he wants but we would have some sort of relationship. But her other contact times haven't really come through. So I'm not sure what's going to happen. All bets are off at this point I guess. IP: Logged |
peacefulclouds
Knowflake Posts: 1301
From: somewhere in south and the east
Registered: Jan 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 01:43 PM
I'm not saying he's a lost cause <3 just have to slow down and keep ur options open. It's still VERY new, so don't put any stock in it. He could be someone, he could be no one, we don't know (and we see how many readings are never 100% accurate) lol But see it this way, you're already honest, it's their move to respond to ur honest interaction/communication. If they move away? **** 'em, they're not worth anyone's time. But don't chase, cause you're worth more than eating just crumbs(sparse attention), you know what I mean?
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FairyDust75
Knowflake Posts: 2192
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 01:49 PM
I know what you mean. I totally do. I guess it's just, I always try to treat everyone with kindness and respect. So I guess I expect the same back, although that's not the way the world works. I'd rather have someone tell me they aren't interested anymore than leave me hanging. It is early to tell. He could be just busy with the holidays. He does have kids, there could be a million reasons. But still, everyone carries their phone and has at least 2 seconds to respond to a text. No one is that busy. Anyway, moving on. It is Christmas and it's time to be merry and bright. Whatever will happen will happen and that's that. IP: Logged |
peacefulclouds
Knowflake Posts: 1301
From: somewhere in south and the east
Registered: Jan 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 01:54 PM
Merry xmas, and I know it seems painful to be alone but baby steps, all ur experience won't be for naught even if you can't see it right now  If you ever need to rant (often saves you a reading $ lol) you can always email me at peacefulclouds at mail dot com, I may not respond straight away but I will always read and try to respond if you need a sounding board. Cheers xoxo IP: Logged |
FairyDust75
Knowflake Posts: 2192
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 01:56 PM
Thanks! I will jot down your email. I'd love to chat some time. Dating sucks. I keep telling myself the right one will come but I keep getting the same kind of guys. IP: Logged |
St@r2013
Knowflake Posts: 2012
From:
Registered: Jun 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 03:43 PM
Fairy, it sounds like S isn't really interested... you sent him two texts already and he hasn't responded... I hope you don't mind but I'll quote some text from the book 'He's Just Not That Into You': "He’s Just Not That Into You - If He’s Not Calling You
Men Know How to Use the Phone
Oh sure, they say they’re busy. They say that they didn’t have even a moment in their insanely busy day to pick up the phone. It was just that crazy. ******** . With the advent of cell phones and speed dialing it is almost impossible not to call you. Sometimes I call people from my pants pocket when I don’t even mean to. We may try to make you think differently, but we men are just like you. We like taking a break from our generally mundane day to talk to someone we like. It makes us happy. And we like to be happy. Just like you. If I were into you, you would be the bright spot in my horribly busy day. Which would be a day that I would never be too busy to call you. The “But He’s Been Traveling a Lot” Excuse
Dear Greg,
I recently started dating a very nice man. He’s gentle, he’s affectionate, he’s attentive. It recently became a long-distance thing because of his work. The first problem is, he really doesn’t call me when he says he’s going to. Actually, he really doesn’t call me that much at all. A week will go by, and then I’ll call him, and then he’ll call me back four or five days later. But then when he does get me on the phone, it’s all “honey” and “baby” and “I miss you so much” and “when do I get to see you again?” Is he just not that into me, or can I just chalk it up to the crazy-long distance thing?
Gina
FROM THE DESK OF GERG
Hey, Crazy Long Distance!
The only distance that’s bothering me is the very long distance between you and reality. (Okay, that was a little mean.) Example? In your second sentence you said, “He’s gentle, he’s affectionate, he’s attentive.” But a few sentences later you say, “He really doesn’t call me when he says he’s going to. Actually, he really doesn’t call me that much at all.” That is neither affectionate nor attentive. And it’s not gentle—it’s a harsh clanging bell that rings, “I’m just not that into you.” Why, then, is he nice when he calls, you ask? Because men are cowards and they would rather wait until the end of time than give you bad news. For the record, a man who likes you wants to spend time with you. And he’ll only settle for talking to you on the phone five times a day when he physically can’t get on a plane to come see you.
Don’t let the “honeys” and “babys” fool you. His sweet nothings are exactly that. They are much easier to say than “I’m just not that into you.” Remember, actions speak louder than “There’s no cell reception where I am right now.”
-------------- This actually made me think about this guy I started chatting online with. It takes him two days or so to reply to my messages... I wanted to meet him to see if there's a click but now I'm thinking hmmm maybe it's pointless and he's just not that into me... IP: Logged |
lily712lily
Knowflake Posts: 305
From:
Registered: Oct 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 03:53 PM
Hey, I kinda feel stupid, asking this here... But I really don't feel like signing up for a different forum (and what forum would that even be?) just to ask this. I know that some people here have tried online dating, so I hope you can help me figure out Ok Cupid. On a whim, I made a profile earlier today, just putting a photo and some basic info up (didn't fill out the fields that ask you to talk about yourself--tbh, I feel very uneasy about online dating & I might delete the profile shortly; but then... I don't seem to be able to meet anyone irl). Anyways, I get what messages (still haven't opened the couple I got... Idk why, but I feel very uncomfortable with it all atm) and profile views are. lol But what's Quickmatch? It says, X number of people likes you... So what does that mean? (I know I must sound really stupid...) How do you even like people? (I'd probably figure that out if I actually visited someone's profile, but then I don't want to visit anyone's profile... Ugh, what's wrong with me?)
TL;DR: What's quickmatch on OKC? Thanks!
Also, is online dating as scary as it seems to me atm?IP: Logged |
St@r2013
Knowflake Posts: 2012
From:
Registered: Jun 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 03:58 PM
Hey Lily, Online dating isn't too scary. Once you upload some pictures on your okcupid profile you'll get lots of messages from guys. If you like someone you can send them a message. Just give it a go for two weeks or something. See if you have interesting conversation with someone... IP: Logged |
SophiaFrank
Knowflake Posts: 582
From:
Registered: Jun 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 04:03 PM
I remember when I first saw the movie: He's Just Not That Into You...I was watching the entire time saying to myself..Omgosh that is so me..Oh my goodness I did that also.. tisk tisk..What really changed my life was the day I read "Why Men Marry ******* " by Sherry Argov...I think people comprehend things differently and take different examples from the book that help them in all sorts of ways. There was one Chapter that was my official ahhhhh HA moment. Could have saved me over $5,000 dollars in psychic readings..well maybe $3,000... There was one simple paragraph that said...if you want to know where something is going JUST ASK... put it out there..and that's what I did..the guy was brutally honest and I knew after he answered the question he was without a living doubt a complete utter PSYCHOPATH/SOCIOPATH MIX. I guess some guys could play with the answer and be like yeah I'm into you and blah blah but if the actions don't follow after it has been put out there well... the douche doesn't deserve you anyway. 2015 is my break from Dating. Taking the entire year off. (Never in a million years did I think I would say that) I am so emotionally exhausted I think I deserve a break! Well off to making Chex Mix and cookies for the shelters. Takes my mind off of all the crazy going on in my life. Wish you all Happy Holidays  IP: Logged |
lily712lily
Knowflake Posts: 305
From:
Registered: Oct 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 04:09 PM
Thank you, Star! That makes me feel better. It was kind of difficult for me to put even this one photo (of my face) up; the entire time I felt like I'm a piece of meat trying to sell myself to random guys. (When I go out, at least I primarily go to have fun with friends, not to meet someone. And the fact that I'm a very private person, despite my rambling, doesn't help--putting pics online & having no way of controlling who sees them is sort of scary.) I can be weird like that.
I'm also kind of afraid of inappropriate messages... Do those happen? Does the website filter them in any way? (I'm a big girl & can get saucy... but with guys I know & am comfortable with.)
Idk, I may be just looking for excuses to not even try...IP: Logged |
St@r2013
Knowflake Posts: 2012
From:
Registered: Jun 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 04:10 PM
The movie was nice but the book is really good read too. In a nutshell it's all about us women lowering our standards and accepting behavior that we shouldn't accept by making excuses for the guys. And when you think about it, once you start making excuses for his behavior ('he's just too busy', 'he has a lot on his mind' etc etc) you are telling yourself that you are willing to put up with behavior that you don't like/appreciate/makes your stress. Why do that? IP: Logged |
St@r2013
Knowflake Posts: 2012
From:
Registered: Jun 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 04:13 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lily712lily:
Thank you, Star! That makes me feel better. It was kind of difficult for me to put even this one photo (of my face) up; the entire time I felt like I'm a piece of meat trying to sell myself to random guys. (When I go out, at least I primarily go to have fun with friends, not to meet someone. And the fact that I'm a very private person, despite my rambling, doesn't help--putting pics online & having no way of controlling who sees them is sort of scary.) I can be weird like that.
I'm also kind of afraid of inappropriate messages... Do those happen? Does the website filter them in any way? (I'm a big girl & can get saucy... but with guys I know & am comfortable with.)
Idk, I may be just looking for excuses to not even try...
I never had any inappropriate messages ... but lots of 'hi'. Makes you feel like they send that to every single profile whereas I was looking for a bit more ... I liked the ones who actually responded to something in my profile, made me think they took the time to read it at least.. I can see why it can be scary, I felt the same, but it's really not a big deal... it can be fun.
IP: Logged |
FairyDust75
Knowflake Posts: 2192
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 04:16 PM
I've seen the movie a million times. I know. If he's not calling or texting you back he's not interested. I know. IP: Logged |
lily712lily
Knowflake Posts: 305
From:
Registered: Oct 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 04:20 PM
quote:
Originally posted by St@r2013:
I never had any inappropriate messages ... but lots of 'hi'. Makes you feel like they send that to every single profile whereas I was looking for a bit more ... I liked the ones who actually responded to something in my profile, made me think they took the time to read it at least.. I can see why it can be scary, I felt the same, but it's really not a big deal... it can be fun.
I think I'll give it at least a couple of days; thank you! You calmed my ridiculous self down quite a bit. I might even try and write something about myself... I don't understand why you can't see who likes you without paying, though (the quickmatch thingy seems to be related to that?). (They could have picked a different feature to monetize...) Whatever, I guess, people probably just click like or whatever randomly/mindlessly (something like all the hi's, lol). IP: Logged |
lilacbreeze
Knowflake Posts: 551
From:
Registered: Oct 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 05:49 PM
Just wanted to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and happy holidays!! Here's to a bright, happy and successful 2015 for all of us IP: Logged |
Julz87
Knowflake Posts: 1038
From: Over the Rainbow
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted December 24, 2014 07:59 PM
Happy Holidays everybody, and have a wonderful New Year. Julz <3 IP: Logged |
ProxyxBlue
Knowflake Posts: 765
From:
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 08:13 PM
quote:
Originally posted by FairyDust75:
I've seen the movie a million times. I know. If he's not calling or texting you back he's not interested. I know.
I suppose if a person has hope for something, then unless something unforgiving happens, then they will still have some hope left. The movie does offer a lot of advice, however the same could be said for some women too. In this case, I can understand Fairy a bit more because it seems our personality is similar when it comes to someone we are interested in. As for "S", I honestly believe he will text you back, but it would be when you least expect it. That's how it always happens. Also, a side note. I'm not sure if you need to have a special connection with the person, but whenever I feel a pulsating feeling in my chest whoever I'm thinking of as soon as I feel that sensation, that person eventually contacts me. If that ever happens to you and S pops into your mind, then maybe he's thinking about contacting you. I'm not sure if this is everyone, but that how it is for me. IP: Logged |
Vivi327
Knowflake Posts: 1012
From:
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 08:17 PM
Hello all wanted to wish everyone very happy holidays and a beautiful new year ....I also wanted to reccomend the baggage reclaim blog or website...just google baggage reclaim...it really opened my eyes about the patterns I was repeating and the men I was attracting!IP: Logged |
SophiaFrank
Knowflake Posts: 582
From:
Registered: Jun 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 08:49 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Vivi327:
Hello all wanted to wish everyone very happy holidays and a beautiful new year ....I also wanted to reccomend the baggage reclaim blog or website...just google baggage reclaim...it really opened my eyes about the patterns I was repeating and the men I was attracting!
Yes!!! I love Baggage Reclaim. Helped me alot.. I watched all of her videos on youtube no ass clowns 2015! IP: Logged |
MineAgain
Knowflake Posts: 1708
From: A place where dreams come true
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted December 24, 2014 08:51 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ProxyxBlue:
Also, a side note. I'm not sure if you need to have a specially connection with the person, but. Whenever I feel a pulsating feeling in my chest whoever I'm thinking of as soon as I feel that sensation, that person eventually contacts me. If that ever happens to you and S pops into your mind, then maybe he's thinking about contacting you. I'm not sure if this is everyone, but that how it is for me.
Same here. However, I find it happening with people I have a strong bond with. Rarely with people I've only met once.
IP: Logged |
Vivi327
Knowflake Posts: 1012
From:
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 08:57 PM
quote:
Originally posted by SophiaFrank:
Yes!!! I love Baggage Reclaim. Helped me alot.. I watched all of her videos on youtube no ass clowns 2015!
Amen to NO ASSCLOWNS IP: Logged |
ProxyxBlue
Knowflake Posts: 765
From:
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted December 24, 2014 08:58 PM
quote:
Originally posted by MineAgain:
Same here. However, I find it happening with people I have a strong bond with. Rarely with people I've only met once.
Ah, you too? That's why I mentioned the "special connection." I always get that feeling only with Y. But when someone randomly pops into my mind without that feeling, there is a chance that person might call me or something. IP: Logged |
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