Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted May 04, 2012 12:39 AM            

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what's worse than listening to your crush talk about the girl he likes? considering the fact that there was a mutual understanding between you two that was never put into words.

what's worse than seeing him fall for someone else and tells you how jealous he was when he saw her with another guy? considering the fact that they've only knew each other for about a month, it makes me wonder if he really did like me..why did he fell for her so fast? For 3 years i thought there was something more between us, my friends and even strangers thought there's gotta be something. Why did it all changed upon meeting her?

What's worse than being still in love with him and you're there helping him out to get that girl? I just wanted to see him happy. I'm so stupid. I knew it was killing me inside but still I didn't cared. I know I cant stand the thought of him being with someone else but if that what makes him happy then i'll try not to care. I gave him advices on what to do and how to approach her, and yes..i was dying inside during that moment

whats worse than missing the opportunity to tell him what you feel when you had the chance. It feels terrible knowing that i just let everything slip on my hands.

whats worse than keeping what you really feel inside, hiding what really hurts, pretend it doesn't bother you...its hard.

We're both in college btw. and for some reason, even when some guys are already showing their interest in me, i always keep running back to him. i try to forget the times when he showed that he could be liking me, it just doesnt look real to me anymore, i feel used. </3

sorry to brag about my situation but i thought i just gotta let somebody to hear me out and oh, my scorpio venus highlights my "emo-ness" in my post and my saggie moon doesn't like it!

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Posts: 20439
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009

posted May 04, 2012 11:34 AM            

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Been there. Not a good feeling. It will get better, though.

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"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark

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Posts: 129
From: Neptune because it's blue
Registered: Sep 2011

posted May 05, 2012 06:21 AM            

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Hey heartstrings
Trust me, I understand how you feel. It must be really tough And given your Scorpio Venus, it must be killing you everyday.

The only thing I could do in such a situation was to consciously/subconsciously call him my friend. Nothing more, nothing less. It takes a while but you just have to let go for your own good :/

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted May 05, 2012 10:39 AM            

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I just keep quiet and watch, silently tortured, as he fall for someone else.

Thank you for the replies, at least some people cared to read my post. I know I have other things to worry about especially exams are coming up but I can't just ignore my feelings, not now. They're already intoxicating me and it's hard for it to go unnoticed because the pain, the pain is already taking over me...and it's even harder because I wish I could talk to someone about it but I cant </3

I can really feel the effects of my venus in scorpio, i loved him intensely but I wasn't loved back the way I wanted to and I just wanna get out of this situation fast, cut out the pain but no matter what I do I still love him. It's not infatuation what I feel, I know this is something real but sometimes life really gets tough and I just gotta deal with it.. :'( I'm really sorry for blabbing waaay too much about what I feel right now but I think its kind of helping me to let go of some of the things that I've been keeping bottled up for soo long

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Posts: 1612
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010

posted May 06, 2012 10:38 PM            

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Oh girl, been there (and there's a gigantic thread of rants to prove it).
Boys are really stupid right now and do stupid things that make absolutely no sense to anyone but them. Time heals everything, if you value your friendship with him enough to stick around you'll have to grin and bear it until it doesn't affect you anymore. If you don't feel it's worth it though you just distance yourself, you'll get over him much more quickly when you're not around him.

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Posts: 116
From:
Registered: Oct 2011

posted May 08, 2012 11:22 AM            

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i hope you feel better soon heartstrings have you tried asking him if he ever liked you at some point? i know this takes a lot of courage to do but I think that is the only way to find out if you want to know where you really stand in his life...

You said he just met this new girl, then maybe try and get to know the girl, maybe you can stand out from him against the other girl eventually cos if you and him are really good friends, and as you mentioned, best friends, then he might realize that all this time he was hurting you, but then again, putting everything into words would make it a lot easier for you, why? because because you don't have to wonder about his feelings for you anymore and maybe you could try and start to move on. I know it's hard, it feels like being betrayed, it feels like 5 knives are stabbing you in the chest all at the same time, but if you wanna let go of the pain, you jut gotta accept and let go

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted May 10, 2012 02:24 AM            

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he likes her, he said he's going to ask her out soon. now i feel like crap. He said he's going to have lunch with her today, and hang out with her for two hours..he's asking me what he should do, what to talk about with her, and slowly..i feel i'm breaking into pieces, i like him being around me but, it just doesn't feel the same anymore, i can't even look at him in the eyes..i'm dying inside as he talk to me about her...i tried avoiding him, but i just feel so rude when i do, i tried keeping a minimum contact with him, tried making myself believe that i never felt anything special for him but its almost the same as lying to my own self..i just wanna die. right. now.

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Posts: 1452
From: UNITED STATES, BABY
Registered: Jan 2012

posted May 11, 2012 12:16 AM            

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Heartstrings
YOU SHOULD GIVE HIM TERRIBLE ADVICE. Then tell him you want him. You were there first and what he has is an infatuation of enamourous feelings. What he has for you is real love, you've known eachother longer and have actually memories and history together. He just doesnt know he has real love because the infatuation clouds his judgement. Tell him how you feel or felt and expect the best. If it doesnt work, you already know the outcome and have already dealt with the anxieities of it. (So you're prepared.) If it fails with the girl, then if there was any chance to begin with, he'll go to you.
Where you went wrong was when your honest relationship with him turned to lies and secrets. You should have told him you didnt want him to date her in the first place. That would be being honest. He might've just been testing you, like someone with scorpionic placements would do if they liked someone. He probably wanted to see your reaction and because you didnt give him one he mightve thought it was safe to look elsewhere. The problem is, you don't know and theres where you need communication to solve your problems.
I wish you luck. I know doing this will be hard because this is feeling and emotion and the heart and thats nothing compared to the rational side of love a sag moon won't dare to think about. They're about the passionate ups and downs.. A little not so realistic, but what can you do.

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"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." -Brian Littrell

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted May 12, 2012 11:57 AM            

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Thank you Desiring Shadows. You are right, I should've just told him at the very beginning that I didn't wanted him to start a relationship with her but the thing is, I am afraid that I might come across as being selfish, manipulative, desperate, all those negative things being labelled to me and he might just push me away

How should I approach this situation? What can I say to him or ask him in order for him to understand what I'm really trying to say? I wanna tell him that I was falling for him all this time and I thought he was too, and now its hurting me cos it seems like he never really did, and I wanna know if he ever did like me at some point...

*sigh* I can't concentrate studying right now don't think there's even enough time for me to study for the exams and this situation i'm in at the moment isn't helping me at all. I really really feel thankful for everyones responses, I have no one else to tell about this because my parents don't really like the idea of me thinking/talking about boys so all this time i had to hide my true feelings to everyone I'm soo close to my breaking point!

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted May 22, 2012 06:51 AM            

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he bought her a little gift, I was with him while he was buying it..as much as I try not to burst into tears, he has no idea how much this is ripping me apart </3 how can i forget him when i always see him everyday? -_____-

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Posts: 129
From: Neptune because it's blue
Registered: Sep 2011

posted May 22, 2012 11:48 AM            

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heartstrings.. I know this is tough, but really! You HAVE to take control of your life.
I know this is tough, it really is. But trust me, if you don't have something, it's not meant for you & there is something wayy better for you out there. I know this is easier said than done, but trust me, a lil bit of faith will get you out of this.
And I am not saying this just to encourage you, I truly believe in this, cuz when I was in a similar situation, I let go.. and about 3 months later, I had someone absolutely wonderful in my life.. and now it's been 2 something years with him!
You need faith in yourself, and you need it now!

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Posts: 3796
From: Jupiter
Registered: Jan 2012

posted May 22, 2012 12:37 PM            

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Hugs

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Posts: 1821
From: The East Coast
Registered: Mar 2011

posted May 22, 2012 07:29 PM            

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It really helps if you distance yourself from him. And in time you'll be alright. I know it doesn't seem that way but it will.

One day he'll just be another memory. And believe it or not you'll love someone else one day who'll love you back.

But with this guy.. if it's meant to be, it'll be. Allow yourself to be happy.

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"The snake which cannot cast its skin has to die. As well the minds which are prevented from changing their opinions; they cease to be mind." --- Friedrich Nietzsche

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted May 22, 2012 09:41 PM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by affy:
heartstrings.. I know this is tough, but really! You HAVE to take control of your life.
I know this is tough, it really is. But trust me, if you don't have something, it's not meant for you & there is something wayy better for you out there. I know this is easier said than done, but trust me, a lil bit of faith will get you out of this.
And I am not saying this just to encourage you, I truly believe in this, cuz when I was in a similar situation, I let go.. and about 3 months later, I had someone absolutely wonderful in my life.. and now it's been 2 something years with him!
You need faith in yourself, and you need it now!

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I am trying...i just need enough time to take it in... everytime he reminds me that we are best friends it just makes things a LOT harder for me, i wish i could disappear for a moment, be away from him and hope that our distance will put things back on their right places...after years of keeping my true feelings inside, after seeing him ask another girl out once and come running back to me when he got rejected, being able not to cry in front of him as he talks about this new girl, i think all these crushed me but at the same time made me a strong person that i am right now..I think I can move on, eventually..i believe i am strong, i just need more time..thank you affy and to everyone else's wonderful advice you guys are the only people that keeps things bearable for me right now, at least you understand

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted May 22, 2012 09:44 PM            

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*dp

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Posts: 20439
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009

posted May 23, 2012 09:24 AM            

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Been there.

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"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark

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Posts: 129
From: Neptune because it's blue
Registered: Sep 2011

posted May 23, 2012 10:46 AM            

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Anytime heartstrings.. we're all here for you, because we care about everyone who's willing to share a part of their lives with us and make us feel like we can make a difference
There are so many things to look forward to in life, and as Alma Sun implied, it is just a phase. Things will look brighter soon!

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Posts: 129
From: Neptune because it's blue
Registered: Sep 2011

posted May 31, 2012 05:07 PM            

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Hey heartstrings! you here?
I don't find you posting in any of the other forums that I look at :/ Hope you're doing fine

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Posts: 44
From:
Registered: May 2012

posted June 09, 2012 04:06 AM            

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I'm going through this at the moment. It sincerely hurts. I blame my virgo moon but I mean... I guess I was just too scared to tell him.

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted June 09, 2012 08:54 AM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by lemonkitty:
I'm going through this at the moment. It sincerely hurts. I blame my virgo moon but I mean... I guess I was just too scared to tell him.

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hey lemonkitty, i'm a virgo sun! but i definitely blame being partly scorpio-ish...i love waay too deep i only had few crushes in my entire life and he's the only one i let my self to fall into </3 and yes, i was also too scared to tell him my true feelings

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted June 09, 2012 09:00 AM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by affy:
Hey heartstrings! you here?
I don't find you posting in any of the other forums that I look at :/ Hope you're doing fine

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heyy affy! i'm doing fine, thanks for asking been quite busy for a while due to exams, i'm really really trying to forget about this stuff now but couldn't resist to ask other knowflakes for advice in the Astrology section the other day xD oh love love love, what else could we expect? hah

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted June 23, 2012 09:50 AM            

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yesterday, i posted a status message on my facebook somewhere along the lines of "...letting go of certain friendships is hard. It hurts but it's better to let go now than being lead on and ignored for life.."

He respoded few minutes later with, "uh.. are you implying something????" the status was about him..now my question is, HOW SHOULD I VIEW THIS AS A RESPONSE FROM HIM? was he aware of what was really happening between us, me trying to distant my self while him, still trying to keep me around? at first i thought he was afraid that it must be him that i was talking about but i might have expected too much and read waay into things..maybe he's just really curious to know? i don't wanna get my self too involved with him anymore, i wanna stop this crush/infatuation/love whatever you call it! i just want this to end so i'm trying really hard to limit my contact with him... ugh, love sucks

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Posts: 165
From: The center of your mind- muhuwuaaa
Registered: Jun 2012

posted June 23, 2012 02:48 PM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by heartstrings:
yesterday, i posted a status message on my facebook somewhere along the lines of "...letting go of certain friendships is hard. It hurts but it's better to let go now than being lead on and ignored for life.."

He respoded few minutes later with, "uh.. are you implying something????" the status was about him..now my question is, HOW SHOULD I VIEW THIS AS A RESPONSE FROM HIM? ...

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Yes, you should view this as a reply from him! At some level he knows what time it is, the the clock is going tic toc and he better find out where he stands with you.
An answer you can give can go along the lines of" No dummy, I'm not IMPLYING a thing, I'm TELLING you I'm not going to be your helpful little sounding board everytime you decide to notice every other girl on the planet, except the one you should have seen a long, long, time ago, the one right in front of you. And beside you. And behind you. All this time. And time is running out. So, I have one question - are you man enough to stand in front of, behind, and beside ME
always?"

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Posts: 315
From: the pineapple under the sea
Registered: Aug 2011

posted June 24, 2012 10:36 AM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by David Bowie Eyes:
Yes, you should view this as a reply from him! At some level he knows what time it is, the the clock is going tic toc and he better find out where he stands with you.
An answer you can give can go along the lines of" No dummy, I'm not IMPLYING a thing, I'm TELLING you I'm not going to be your helpful little sounding board everytime you decide to notice every other girl on the planet, except the one you should have seen a long, long, time ago, the one right in front of you. And beside you. And behind you. All this time. And time is running out. So, I have one question - are you man enough to stand in front of, behind, and beside ME
always?"

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ah! so he knew I was talking about him... I dunno David Bowie Eyes, I could use your advice definitely.. but I guess walking away is better for me just like how the old saying goes, "there are things in life that are better left unsaid"..Its too late for me to do anything now if you read the previous posts and besides, I dunno if telling him what I truly feel will change what he feels for me.. now I'm wondering if he was actually afraid of losing me because of what I have just said on facebook..he now knows I am determined to detach my self from him no matter what, I just really find it hard to stay in this platonic friendship anymore

I love him so much that it hurts.. and the only way to end the pain is cut him off my life..yup, that's my venus in scorpio's logic right there

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Posts: 165
From: The center of your mind- muhuwuaaa
Registered: Jun 2012

posted June 24, 2012 11:11 AM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by heartstrings:
ah! so he knew I was talking about him... I dunno David Bowie Eyes, I could use your advice definitely.. but I guess walking away is better for me just like how the old saying goes, "there are things in life that are better left unsaid"..Its too late for me to do anything now if you read the previous posts and besides, I dunno if telling him what I truly feel will change what he feels for me.. now I'm wondering if he was actually afraid of losing me because of what I have just said on facebook..he now knows I am determined to detach my self from him no matter what, I just really find it hard to stay in this platonic friendship anymore

I love him so much that it hurts.. and the only way to end the pain is cut him off my life..yup, that's my venus in scorpio's logic right there

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Yes ma'am, I read your other posts. And in reading this one I'll defer to your logic, trying to change you to fit the advice is no good advice at all...
Whether you change your perspective or no on your own, recall these truths for all future things that involve you, others, and your heart.

You cannot change them.

Their feelings can be influenced, if those feelings are already there.

What you can't do is change water into wine, nor would you want to if you could.

Most important, please consider this if you consider nothing else. Always find out where you stand by whatever means that work for you. To suffer silently or to go against your own health and happiness to make another happy means that you are sacrificing your own ability to love and support, when really needed. And really needed includes when you need you.

S

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