posted July 10, 2015 03:07 PM            

As it happens, the Hanged Man is one of the most intriguing, esoteric cards of tarot and connected to at least these major symbols: Hebrew letters Mem and Lamed, the Tau Cross, the Ankh (for Crowley, it is actually suspended by the ankh) and the alchemical Sulfur symbol, which is in fact its position. I could write an entire story about this, I would at least try to compile some ideas or links. Check this one:
http://hermetic.com/kimbell/lectures/the-hanged-man.html

The message of the dream is addressed to you and it has an important meaning for heart chakra healing: 3 of Swords + Ace of Cups

The message is also addressed to at least another person on the thread, and they will know who they are. It could even be ALL: 10 of Cups.

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 10, 2015 03:11 PM            

Clarifier on Strength as the major clue of the spread:
The Lovers

Additional cards on Lovers, although it wasn't necessary, but it was my way of enjoying the story more

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 10, 2015 03:19 PM            

The Hanged Man in your dream seems to say: waiting/believing in true love pays off. The waiting is almost over, the cycle is complete. Notice the two completion cards: 10 of Pentacles and 10 of Cups, flanking the middle card, a card of endurance, faith, fighting and winning. A card of feminine power, purity and unrelenting pursuit of a worthy goal.

With the 4 of Swords, a card of waiting, but also eternity (in combination of the complex symbolistics of eternity here: 10 of pentacles, 10 of Cups, the Ankh you probably saw, the Hanged Man, the lemniscate), and the reunion and true love cards, several mythical love stories and myths are gathered in your Hanged Man: Romeo and Juliet, Sleeping Beauty, Baucis and Philemon (depicted in the 10 of pents) and all the lovers reuniting. Maybe it's a direct relation to your ex or him returning to you in another form, love returning to you in another form.

But the principle of "faith in love ultimately brings true love" is the beautiful message here.

Your Hanged Man is an eternal lover - you- about to descend from its cross.

For those who have waited, Hanged Man usually appears just before doing that

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 10, 2015 03:27 PM            

You wanna know the sentence I wrote just in a mail before coming her (not sure while Iinterrupted writing that mail for coming here though)

Actually the topic was the fanmeeting I am going to go to and my friend pointed out that I probably would not have done that with 50 kios more, she is right, but there is another reason for this:

"Yes, small steps. And no I wouldn´t have done it with 50 kilos more.
It also has to do with the little pact I have made with myself, that I will not let my fear or insecurities or shyness keep me from doing things I really want. And I really want to be there. So I will be.
And the rest I will figure out once I will be there.
It will feel awkwards I suppose, also because I do not know anyone there. laughter
In fact I could say that I know him best from all the people who are going to be there!"

(it followed the discussion of the dream I had 2 days ago, which actually reminded me of a dream I had on 26th october 2013, as the setting was the same, and I now wonder if it had been a prophetic one back then).

posted July 10, 2015 03:32 PM            

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 10, 2015 03:34 PM            

Like usually when such a mood comes over me, I check the transiting chart.

Now we have Tr Pluto on 14 Cap conjunct Tr ASC on 14 Cap on my natal Mr Sag in my chart on 13 Cap and my Hermes I think on 14 Cap.

Also interestingly when he was addressing me on the open air concert 2 weeks ago Tr Pluto had been conjunct Tr ASC as well! It usually is when something like that happens to us.
(in this instance puts the Tr pluto-ASC on our composit eVenus, and opposite my Saturn)

Tr Vertex right between Venus and Jupiter on our composite Vertex exact and opposing our Psyche-Psyche-conjunction

also conjuncts our Isis-Osiris-conjunction in Davison exact

Tr Moon on 13 Taurus on my Sphinx exact and opposing composite chartruler Uranus, conjunct composite Eros-Priapus-IC.

Well, I did not mean to be even talking about him, but is it my fault htat these transits are doing all kind of stuff to our composite?

More important for me, there is no giving in to fears and insecurities and paranoia anymore. No more running away, ignoring, putting my head into the sand, sticking my head above the clouds and let it stay there, no ivory towers to hide inside. No matter how much it stings. And it will sting. That`s life, it`s for living.

posted July 10, 2015 04:48 PM            

Wow LeeLoo! There's a lot of good information in that article! Several things really stood out, especially the part about the Sleep of Sialam. I have prophetic dreams, and astral projections, as well as spiritual communications while sleeping. I regularly enter that in between sleep/awake state, which is often triggered by intense erotic dreams. It's a prolonged state of ecstasy that feels physically exhausting. I often go into a lucid, weightless state at that point. That article has my mind going in a hundred directions! I read some other stuff about Crowley(whom I've always seen as a creepy character) and his methods of triggering these experiences through physical sexual stimulation. I guess I don't need the physical stimulation to reach that state, though it's worth trying.

The same night I had a separate dream that I was writing the letters J(my first initial) and F(my crush's last initial)in a calligraphy type of lettering. Like school girls scribble on their notebooks. The 2 letters looked nearly identical. It sort of reminded me of the Foo Fighters symbol, but it was much more ornate. There was a young girl looking at what I was writing, and I felt like I was writing in code.

It's strange that I would have 2 dreams in the same night involving these ornate symbols and letters. Later that evening, I went to the store and I parked next to a car that had strange symbols on the side and back windshield. I wish I'd taken a picture! Now it seems relevant. I always look for signs.

The tarot dream actually reminded me of my crush because he reads tarot, which I only recently discovered. In the dream my ex was ever the skeptic, as he is in real life, and I was kind of annoyed that he didn't believe in tarot. In reality, I feel that his skepticism made me censor myself when it came my intuition and clairvoyance. Even though he does reluctantly admit that I do have prophetic dreams and psychic abilities, it's always made him very uncomfortable. Also, he usually rolls his eyes if I mention astrology, but recently he's asked me for predictions based on astrology. This is because I predicted several major life events with accurate timing (2 of them falling at eclipses) so now he's giving me more credit. These were based on dreams, and I used astrology to pinpoint the timing since the recent eclipses were lighting up his chart.

posted July 10, 2015 05:04 PM            

I'll go into details later, when I have the time. I was thinking of blowing off an artsy event that I'd planned on attending, but after reading Ceri's posts I think I should go. Who knows, I might have a near life experience. I'm sure I'll meet a few eccentric weirdos, so I'll fit right in.

posted July 10, 2015 05:29 PM            

Also, your calligraphy story seems important and reminds me of Greenaway's Pillow Book, I hope you've seen it. Also, I think you should start a dream journal now! It will change a lot, you will see.

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 12, 2015 01:52 AM            

Yes, Crowley was very skilled in the occult, no doubt. I've always sensed that he was motivated by lust and power, which invites darker energies. An occultist with a personal agenda is a very dangerous combination. Most of what I know about him came from a former coworker...he was a Mason and a fellow conspiracy theorist. We had some very interesting conversations about all sorts of things like ancient Egypt, the Mayans, the Catholic church, the Nazis, Jesus...how it's all connected, and how we're kept in the dark by the powers that be. Our coworkers thought we were crazy, but it was nice to have a like minded person to discuss these things with. That's why I love LL, but my paranoia prevents me from saying too much.

Actually, the Thoth tarot deck is one of my favorites visually, but I feel weird about getting it because of the Crowley connection. I had a strange feeling about that deck even before I knew he created it, although I am drawn to it. I know there are connections to Rider-Waite too via Golden Dawn, but I don't get the same sinister vibe from that deck. Too bad because the Thoth deck is so beautiful.

posted July 12, 2015 03:28 AM            

The 3 of Swords along with the Ace of Cups is meaningful to me and the situation I've been dealing with over the last couple of years. I've talked about my situation with my ex of 14 years quite a bit, and I've had a really hard time moving on. I still love him, but he gave up on us instead of trying to make it work, and it's left me with a lot of wounds that needed to heal. The Ace of Cups tells me that I'm ready for a new love, and a fresh start.

My feeling in the dream was that I was really excited about understanding the meaning of the cards, and being able to predict what would happen in the movie. My ex was being skeptical (although acknowledging the accuracy), which I wasn't taking too seriously, but I was annoyed by it. In real life, I've been trusting my intuition more than ever...well since childhood anyway, before I realized it wasn't considered "normal". It's been liberating to not have to hold back on my intuitive insights, and just trust what I know. I feel like this dream is a message about the guy that I've been infatuated with for a year now. He is open minded to tarot and astrology, and from day one I've had a very strong psychic tie to him. I met him during a very somber time in my life, where I was crying myself to sleep at night, and trying to heal a broken heart. I was in no shape to enter into a relationship, but I've felt ready in recent months.

I'm loving the 10 of Pentacles, Strength, and the 10 of Cups! I don't want to get ahead of myself, but those are great cards to see, especially given my circumstances. The 10 of Pentacles and 10 of Cups combined makes me think of a partnership that involves being in love, creating a family together, leaving a legacy, and achieving great things as a couple. I always see Strength as a positive card no matter what the context is, because it represents the ability to achieve goals or to overcome negative circumstances. This card comes up a lot when I ask questions about my crush. The funny thing is that he's a Leo Sun/AC and I always wear a lemniscate(infinity symbol) necklace. I would always see this card, even before I knew his birthdate. I started to suspect he was a Leo because of this card, despite the fact I swore he was a Cancer. Sometimes I see tarot as being quite literal, and that's a good example. The Lovers as a clarifier, that makes me very happy!

Even the additional cards that you pulled...the 4 of Swords is very meaningful to me. When my ex and I were officially over I moved a 1,000 miles away to get a fresh start. I purposely isolated myself to take a break, and heal from my broken heart(3 of Swords). I actually met my crush a week later, and I felt an instant connection to him, but I was very aware that I needed to be alone for a while. I still had a lot of mixed emotions to work through. As I mentioned in another thread, he knew an old friend of mine(he died in 2006), and I intuitively knew that he was connected to my friend the second time that I met him. I still have a nagging feeling that we've met before, but I don't know for sure. There is definitely a 6 of Cups feeling of familiarity with him. Also the 2 of Cups, since I see him as someone that I could completely fall in love with!

These are such awesome cards LeeLoo, thank you for giving me a ray of sunshine!!!

posted July 12, 2015 08:15 AM            

I love this kind of things! Very good sign!
It seems I managed to tune in with you, Bluejay, did I understand correctly that you are an 8th house sister? lol

You may experience what is considered the revival of 8th house/Pluto magical/mind powers in adulthood, since they are usually repressed by parents in childhood, and they come on strong later on.

The 5 of pents occurrence blew my mind as well. Notice the Hanged Man has leg problems too lol I hope your friend is feeling better by now.

Crowley, possibly due to drugs, is a vessel, the Book of Law for instance contains important universal messages, and I think the Thoth should be taken like this as well. By vessel I mean that despite his intentions (obviously power and lust oriented) he communicated truths as a medium for them, beyond himself and his intentions.

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted July 12, 2015 11:31 AM            

About the 5 of Pentacles...as I was stalking him outside of his work(lol), I had a strong feeling he was going to be visibly injured, which is why I wanted to see him leave. Even though I expected it, I was still quite shocked to see him hobbling out with a cane! Now if I find out he got hurt by hanging out of a tree by one leg, it will really blow my mind!

posted July 12, 2015 08:32 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bluejay:
Now if I find out he got hurt by hanging out of a tree by one leg, it will really blow my mind!

---

Please let me know what happened, I am too curious now.

For you, Bluejay, check page 116:
http://www.scribd.com/doc/2204105/Pluto-Sign-House-Aspect#scribd

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted August 20, 2015 10:48 PM            

I'm feeling completely devastated right now. I found out today that he did in fact move back to our home state. I'm willing to bet that when he was gone in early July (when I felt that he was physically distant) he was probably out of town interviewing for a new job. My intuition was telling me to act fast. I even had another tarot dream a few days later about the Ace of Swords-just freaking tell him already!!! I also had a dream that I was grabbing his shirt, asking him not to leave.

I could just kick myself because the last time that I saw him was July 24. I had finally decided I was going to confess my feelings for him that day before Venus went retrograde. When I went to his work, the very moment I parked my car, my ex called and I picked up the phone. Ugh!!! I even debated whether I should answer or not. I'm so angry at myself for not trusting my instincts! I saw him through the window at his work, but they were getting ready to close, and there were several people still there. I wouldn't have been able to talk to him in private.

I walked over to a store nearby, and was there for about a half an hour, still on the phone. It just so happens that when I got back in my car, I looked in the mirror and he was getting in his car. I would've had a chance to talk to him, but I hesitated. I believe that was his last day at work, and as he drove away I had a sick feeling. There is no worse feeling than knowing that I could've at least said goodbye to him, even if that was it. I could contact him through social media, but being a secretive Scorpio/8th houser, I don't want to go that route, because I don't have an account. One of his coworkers is going to try to get his number for me, or at least pass on my number to him, so all hope is not lost. I just feel like a real jackass for not striking while the iron was hot. Now he's over 1,000 miles away .

posted August 21, 2015 03:47 AM            

Several months ago I even had a dream about his sister, she didn't like me in the dream. Two days later, on the March 20th eclipse to be exact, I saw his sister while I was out shopping. I had only seen pictures of her, never met her in person, but I knew it was her before I saw her face. She felt energetically familiar, but there was no logical way that I could know it was her without seeing her face. It was weird, and it reaffirmed that I'm very energetically tuned into him, and apparently his sister too. Sorry I'm rambling, I'm just feeling so bummed out, and I'm mad at myself for not following my heart.

posted August 21, 2015 10:13 AM            

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted August 21, 2015 11:23 AM            

I've also been seeing phrases like "strength of will" and "will to love" everywhere lately.

posted August 21, 2015 11:31 AM            

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted September 04, 2015 12:39 PM            

Also, it turns out that when I had the feeling of pain and distance on July 2, he was back in our home state, and had surgery earlier that week. He had interviewed for his new job right before his surgery. I could feel this, and I know there is a strong telepathic connection here. Even though he is into the occult, I think I scare him a bit. I don't think he likes to be seen or known like this.

In synastry we have...
Me/Him
Mars square Venus nearly to the exact minute-Ugh!(this is a DW, but the other orb is 6 deg)
Moon conjunct Pluto 0 deg
Venus conjunct Jupiter 0 deg
Venus conjunct Saturn 1 deg
Sun trine Mars 0 deg
Mars trine Sun 2 deg
DC conjunct Sun 2 deg
NN conjunct Sun 0 deg
Sun conjunct Moon 8 deg
Plus DW 5th house Mars synastry overlays, and a Mercury,Venus,Sun,Mars, Saturn, Jupiter 5th house composite stellium
I don't know his exact birth time, but he's Leo rising and I'm Aquarius rising

I feel like I shouldn't give up so easily because my ex had his Venus opposite my Mars 1 deg, and his Cancer Sun is right on this guy's Mars. I had to be very persistent to get through his walls, and nearly gave up on him. Had I not been, we would've never been together. He has a 12th house Virgo Mars, Venus/Neptune opposition, and Moon opposite Pluto. This new guy has Virgo Venus square Neptune, Scorpio Moon, and that Cancer Mars. They have a very similar vibe, and it's like dejavu, feeling like there is an intense attraction, without any actual acknowledgement. I have no shortage of admirers, but I never like the ones that fall at my feet. I guess I like a challenge.

posted September 05, 2015 06:40 AM            

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala

posted September 05, 2015 07:30 PM            

Thanks LeeLoo for rooting for me! I know I was really disappointed, I was expecting a different reaction from him. I was left pretty confused because of what he said about us being on the same wavelength and having a meeting of the minds. Saying that this was needed for him to feel attracted to a person. I think in his own way he was telling me that the attraction is mutual, but I think he is way too passive to say it out right. It was as if he expected to hear from me again, but I would have to call him-at his work no less. I think his Cancer Mars(most likely in the 12th) and 4th house Scorpio Moon makes him extremely reticent when it comes to emotions. He is sooo Cancerian, I couldn't believe he's a Leo. I keep thinking about the way he looks at me though, the eyes don't lie. Even the first time I met him, we had the longest lingering gaze. I have never seen a man with more beautiful eyes in my life-the most amazing shade of blue-green. With so much Scorpio I never lose a staring contest , so he looked away first, but he was the one that started it. I had just appologized for keeping him late at work, and he made a point to say he wasn't doing anything after work, just going home alone. Then silence and the staring contest, as if he expected me to ask him out. I almost said "In that case you can come over and help me unpack" since I had just moved. That's insane! I always assume everyone is a serial killer, and I would never invite a stranger into my home. For some reason I felt very connected to him from the start. Every other time I've seen him, he always seems happy to see me, and we talk at length. I became increasingly nervous around him though, as my feelings for him grew, and the synchronicities made this feel very fated.

My Cancer Sun ex never said a word about how he felt about me, even after I expressed my feelings to him. After a year of being inseparable, but stuck in the dreaded friend zone, one day he abruptly grabbed me and kissed me, and told me he was in love with me. It came out of nowhere! Another very close Cancer friend was in love with me for 3 years before he finally confessed his feelings for me. He had written notebooks full of poems and journal entries about me, but couldn't bring himself to tell me. I was attracted to him too, but he was such a flirt that I would've stayed in a heightened state of jealousy, so it wouldn't have worked out. Cancers guard their feelings like Fort Knox until they feel the time is right.

posted September 07, 2015 09:34 AM            

I hope he gets his Mars together in due time, such a nice synastry!

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

AstroMandala