posted January 24, 2016 09:19 AM            

I've been trying to decipher my own dreams lately, they have been like different movies lol but i think they had the same meanings for me.

I pulled some cards for you, im a beginner with tarot so please take with a pinch of salt.

I didn't do reversals this time, and got;

Justice, Four of Pents, Knight of Wands, Strength, Seven of wands.

I clarified the 7 of wands with the 10 of cups.

Tower popped up when i shuffled. This card signals the main theme for me.

I think the spread speaks of balance and what you are holding onto. The picture in the tower card is a wall crumbling. Perhaps it means let down your guard and be prepared for more risks? 4 of pents is about holding on to things, so i think the message generally is to let go of what fears you have, face them, show the strength that you have, be willing to take risks(let the walls come down like in the tower) and it will lead you to the 10 of cups.

Alternatively, perhaps the dream is preparing you for a big change(tower).

Let me know what you think, or you may have an alternate interpretation?

posted January 24, 2016 11:11 AM            

the cards are telling you to begin something, to implement a plan, to go for it, whatever it is.
they may also speak about a birth, either literal or metaphorical

posted January 24, 2016 12:49 PM            

The first dream took place at my workplace, however for some reason Mr Sag was part of it, though he ws not there at the time, instead his wife was taking over a temporary job there, though curiously under her maiden name, and she was getting a little annoying as she just wouldnīt leave me be, and complaining about being crazy for chocolate (lol ) and well she obviously knew I had some chocolate and wanted to manipulate me into giving her some. But in fact I did not really care about the chocolate and was giving her the whole bag I had, it didnīt mean that much to me.
It was just curious as she seemed so determined to find a way to communicate with me and get along (which speaks for my subconscious urge for balanced connections, what way ever, I think).

The 2nd dream was really drastic, in that it contained the allusion of rape or rather "taking". And there were two men in it (though strangely enough I was aware that they really were the same man, just at different moments in time).
It was also more or less a "training situation", though not even that threatening, but well rape as training situation still involves physical contact. It was a strange dream yes.
I got along great with the first man, and thought I could handle that situation, especially since I knew he liked me and cared about me. But I couldnīt. When the training situation approached, I got a total break down and was screaming something like: "I swore it! I promised myself! Noone`s ever going to touch me - unasked - AGAIN! Never never again!"
(yeah talk about residual trauma I suppose )

It was NOT the same situation as obviously the one my consciousness chooses to not remember that clearly. But anyway I was hysterical enough in that dream. And the man was completely overwhelmed with that I guess, or simply compassionate enough to not pressure me (even though for some reason that training situation had to happen, it was ordained from "above" ).

Anyway as I mentioned there was a second man, and even though he seemed a principally good man, too, also caring, also compassionate, but the difference being that it was clear that no hysterical fit of mine or dramatic show would keep him on armlenght. Not this time. He wouldn`t let me get away with this another time. No running, no hiding anymore.

As I said, drastic symbolism. Persephone in dream. LOL

The third dream last night was harmless compared to these.
I just wanted to see a concert of Mr Sag on a small venue (probably triggered by the weirdish response he made to a post of mine)

But the first gate was closed, so I had to walk a bit further for the second one. but to reach it I had to go into a swimmingpool swim over to the other side, climb up some stairs.
Anyway I was not even sure I could still swim (as I had not done that for many many years), and in fact at first I was just moving in circles. lol
But eventually and quicker than anticipated I remembered how to swim, and swam to the other side, fully dressed btw. lol Curiously when I got out my clothes were dry again even though they were clearly wet when being in water, as I ciould physically feel the water surround me. lol
Nevertheless dreams are awesome like that, I got into the small club, and there was a strange seating, very unconventional, with me really sitting on the back of a sofa, not too comfortable, but manageable. It was a nice chaotic but warm surrounding though. event hough I had to get used to it not being orderly, not structured, but more well chaotic and individual I guess.
Anyway Mr Sag was there of course, and just chatting to a boy of maybe 10 years, maybe a few years younger, who wanted to sing a song, which he did, and I just remember that he, Mr Sag, was looking at me over the boy`s head. Just a look, but well, I donīt think the dream continued after that. Open end so to speak.
But also... open.

(well there was another part of a dream, where he occurred, but that felt different, more like the dream-in-between-dreams, on that strange level and he was just letting me know "You have no idea what I have in store for you". Ominous. LOL
But dreams are weird like that.)

Anyway I do think these dreams herald a change, not just in terms of the way I connected with Mr Sag (though I think things have become rather obvious by now, and of course there can not be any closer relation, but well, even that is something new for me and I need to find a way to deal), but of course the first dream speaking of wanting to find a way to get a balance by not getting in any way intrusive to their relationship and get along (at least mentally) with his wife as well.

The second dream probably indicating the need to process old trauma and grow beyond it. I can`t run away all the time, when things might get too "close" (and I guess that means more or less emotionally and intimately).

And the third dream, about the water, well getting really into that emotional thing, right?
Just generally speaking of course.

So I guess your readings were very apt.

And yes my defences and walls are crumbling, and he is the catalyst. Event hough there can`t be anything between us, he has always been the catalyst for these things, because for some weird reasons I have no defences against him. I am so ultra defensive (and I may "act" as if I have defenses against him), but the truth is my state-of-the-post-traumatic-art-defense-system, which cries alarm with even so much as someone standing too close to me, does not even RECOGNIZE him as an intruder or stranger. I mean seriously, whenever we are talking (which is rare for good reason) it usually feels like he is about to crawl into me. lol
He must have a very different view on appropriate distance-zones than me or the official consensus.
But for some reason that has never really bothered my defense system. So I guess he was a good candidate to trigger those katalystic processes.

posted January 24, 2016 02:55 PM            

I hope you make something out of it cause I don't have an idea.

posted January 24, 2016 03:30 PM            

intriguing spread.

posted January 24, 2016 04:04 PM            

In my deck the Ace is just a hand with a coin.

posted January 24, 2016 04:23 PM            

funny Ceri! I love your humor!
It's actually my favorite gate in these cards, for it's green and with roses

a little bit about this gate, although it mostly means the threshold of a new path (which is a tangible project) leading to real life success

but RW's golden dawn/rosicrucian symbolism is here, the omnipresent lilies and roses

"The hand reaching out of the cloud presents a divine gift, the pentacle. As a coin, it is a well-known sign of wealth. The symbolism of the pentacle explains how this wealth is acquired. A pentacle visually expresses a person’s understanding of the universe. The pentagram with which it is inscribed represents the Four Elements governed by spirit.

posted January 24, 2016 04:37 PM            

And I am glad you like my humour.

posted January 24, 2016 04:49 PM            

ah btw, what are your aspects to Mercury? I know it conjuncts the Sun, what about the rest?

mine sextiles Moon and Neptune (this means you must have a Moon Mercury aspect too)
and sq Saturn...do you have anything to Saturn? for I guess this should give a particular sense of Saturnian humor not everyone likes

and of course, it also conjuncts Pluto, mine

posted January 24, 2016 05:31 PM            

Well the only major aspect of Mercury is the conjunction to Sun in my natal.
However Mercury is septile Moon. Nothing else though.

Conjunct Jupiter/Pluto-mp though.
and I think also conjuncts MOon/Uranus and squares Mars/Saturn.

the Jupiter/Pluto=Merucry is very close though, just a few minutes. So I guess there is some opinionatedness living inside of me.