Author
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Topic: Hello, kind Knowflakes B-)
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Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted December 02, 2010 06:50 PM
Hi everyone,Ok, where to start? I'm Virgo-AriesArtist, aka Kat, and I've been posting on this board since I was 16 (I'm 25 now). I am eternally grateful for the wise guidance and words of all the Knowflakes here though all the drama highschool brought, and thankful I've been able to share my poetry with such open-minded and kindred souls. Here is my chart: And here is a pic of me: That's all for now...
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juniperb Moderator Posts: 11950 From: Blue Star Kachina Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 03, 2010 08:31 PM
Kat, you know I`ve loved you forever and that`s the first photo I`ve ever seem of you!! Lovely as your poetry juni ------------------ What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world is immortal"~ - George Eliot IP: Logged |
teasel Knowflake Posts: 18134 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 04, 2010 03:44 AM
quote: Originally posted by juniperb:
Lovely as your poetry juni
Good to see you here, VAA. IP: Logged |
SunChild unregistered
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posted December 04, 2010 05:02 AM
Glad you are back with us! And it's good to see your lovely face. ------------------ “It’s an interesting thing. Seeing Kuan Yin relating to a flower so intently. She's not just looking at it; she's interacting with it…I’m seeing how the act of relating to a flower appears to be so simple. Yet, it takes a tremendous amount of courage to make such a “simple” act important. Now, the lotus is floating away.” IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted December 05, 2010 12:30 AM
Thanks for the compliment, juni We clicked right from the start, and I feel blessed to know you.Thanks for the warm welcomes as well, teasel, and SunChild! It's nice to be back IP: Logged |
scorpio17 Knowflake Posts: 906 From: Netherlands Registered: Dec 2009
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posted December 05, 2010 03:48 PM
Hi, Your chart shows warm earth. Nice pic and nice teeth.
S17
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Cancer/Scorpio729 Moderator Posts: 2282 From: 6,000 feet above sea level Registered: Feb 2010
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posted December 05, 2010 04:11 PM
Hi!IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 140659 From: Your Friendly Neighborhood Juris Doctorate. Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 05, 2010 04:47 PM
Welcome home! ------------------ "The earth is not given to us by our mothers and our fathers, it is borrowed from our children." IP: Logged |
PlutoSquared Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: May 2013
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posted December 05, 2010 06:11 PM
Virgos are cool. I'm glad you're here, Virgo-AriesArtist!IP: Logged |
charmainec Knowflake Posts: 8746 From: Venus next to Randall Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 06, 2010 03:08 PM
Welcome ------------------ quote: "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies with in us." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 09, 2011 10:01 AM
I'm really feeling lost right now...Sine this is my thread, I figured this is the best place to vent.. I'll be back later to write more. IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 474 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted June 09, 2011 10:32 AM
Hey!!! I'm glad you brought this one up! I have never seen you before! So lovely, warm and open! Please come back and get it all out!
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Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 09, 2011 02:01 PM
I'm just so confused right now...I should be incredibly happy, I'm getting everything I would have told you I ever wanted: financial security, the man I love (and will be marrying in 4 months), a car that runs consistently, family all around me...The list goes on. And I'm so torn to pieces right now. :'( I love my man, but the job he is at is sucking the life and soul out of him, and he continues to stay, as a Cancer Rising with two planets in Taurus will, even when they demean him, and disrespect him and his abilities. I do not feel like he is the man I fell in love with anymore at all. He used to be playful and I miss that. I've told him this, but he's even more security-based than I am, so...? I miss the flirting between us, I miss feeling desired, and d*mn it, I miss being seen! He is so disconnected lately, he doesn't even ackowledge when I'm in the room other than to make a kissing sound my direction and look up from whatever else he is doing, video-gaming or watching anime. It was getting bad before I took my recent road trip (I was gone for 5 days to MO), and it seemed like he really got his stuff together when I was away, riding his bike alot out to do errands, cooking for himself (even grilling some steak), and staying off the couch, so to speak. Mind you, when I am home, I cannot get him to leave the couch, even to go to the movies on my treat, or walk, or grocery shop or even take a drive in the car. Instead of banging my head against the wall every day, I've taken to going out and doing things on my own, instead of pitching a fit like I used to. After chatting with my mom, she said it sounded like I am looking for companionship in a partner, and well, he's not acting interested in that. We do like some of the same TV shows, some activities, ad we're each gotten each other interested in some indivudual passions. When I got home from the roadtrip, where frankly I didn't miss him cause I was having too much fun, he just wanted to go back to the same old same old, and I'm not feeling it. I don't want him to be intimate with me, and I don't feel sexually connected casue we are not emotionally connecting right now, and that is big for me. He can tell something is on my mind (cause darn that man can literally read my mind most days), but I've been avoiding talking because I feel too unglued myself. IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 09, 2011 02:10 PM
Then of course, whenever I am doubting my relationship, old feelings for another pop up with more strength. I don't need anyone to tell me the past should stay the past, I've heard that too much already, but hot darn, the other guy has always been more fun. Yes, terrible for a long-term partner cause he was never reliable, but the sparks between us....you might remember, pixelpixie cause you've been around LL since the begining...the other man I speak of is the "special Gemini" I used to have feelings for...well, still have f***ed up feeling for that I don't know how to let go, cause he and I never kissed or anything, and that uncrossed bridge is still lingering in my head. I know what is rational, but hte heart wishes otherwise somedays... And the messed up part of that is that both my man now, and the man I still have this blasted connection to are BOTH Geminis! They are not the main part of the issue, I think that I am just unhappy, and I don't exactly know why. I wish I was a different person some days, that I could just escape this life, and start afresh. IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 09, 2011 02:12 PM
There are other things but these are the most pressing on my mind at this exact moment.BTW, my recent poems in YWATA forum express it more clearly than this rambling can... IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted June 09, 2011 11:37 PM
I've been crying a lot today, and it seems the more friends whose opinions I ask, the worse it seems. I love my man, but we've lost the spark and we're not even married yet...this seriously concerns me. And I've been feeling for like the last 6 months like he'll only deal with his bigger issues when I am not here to "distract" him. When he's not out to please me, my gut says he'll find a way to be happy. And the saddest part is that him being unhappy, no matter what he's tryin makg to accomplish, makes me even more gloomy.And on a separate note, being friends with "special Gemini" dude is confusing the h*ll out of me too. He'll get all clingy and close, then I'll feel a little uncomfortable, then I'll pull back, then he'll disappear for a month or two or three plus months without a word, or a call or a text. I did spill when we first reconnected in Jan of 2010 that I had intially pulled out of our friendship back in July 2005 when I realized my romantic feelings were not reciprotated, which is right before I met my current man. He has confessed back to me in the interim that he did reciproate my feelings back then, but did not want to do anything to spoil our friendship. This pleased and ****** me off at the same time. We haven't spoken in like 4.5 months now, other than a random FB message that he never responded to after sending the inital message...oh yes, and cause I felt done, and I'm a child of the digital age, I "unfriended" him on FB, it was more drama-control than anything else cause in spite of it all, I am still attracted to him, and wonder if we can truly be friends without the temptation to act on it. IP: Logged |
Ra Knowflake Posts: 1989 From: Kentucky Registered: May 2009
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posted June 10, 2011 11:20 AM
Hello Kat, it is good to see you.I am sorry to hear of your troubles. It is good that you are openly talking about it, but there is one person you should be including in your talks ... your fiance. It could be very difficult, but it is absolutely necessary. Besides love, communication is the most important aspect of a relationship, and that is what I invariably tell anyone who asks me "how do you and your wife do it?" It's not always easy, but it is necessary. Don't wait for him to read your mind ... he obviously isn't reading it as well as you think. Most men need to be prodded into communicating, myself included, so don't be afraid to push the issue. How else can it be resolved? I am always grateful when my wife makes me talk about stuff, even when I am not in the talking mood. In the end, it is always helpful and only makes our bond stronger. Anyway, I wish you the best and hope you find some peace. IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 474 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted June 12, 2011 10:42 PM
Hello Ra!!! Long time no 'see'!!!I agree with communication. There is not a lot sparkly and new about long term relationships- and you are in one! Whether you are married or not, life and companionship is a lot of communication and missed communication. Sometimes what isn't good for us becomes intriguing for us- whether we have secret needs to 'renovate' and uncover possibilities in a friend who we are attracted to- sometimes attraction is one of those hard to pin down things, other times, palpable. I went through that rocky stage about 6 years into my relationship as well.... I did some of it here, much to my embarrassment....but really- at thirteen plus years together, we're working on a lifetime. Lifetimes come with a lot of change. Marriage is a positive change- it's invigorating and lovely and like a shared mission. Sadly- a lot of people fall into the technology trap... I would urge him to find interests outside of reaching that next level- go so far as to purchase non refundable tickets to an interesting art show, or a wine tatsing, or something that gets you communicating, and gets him realizing YOU are right there and need stimulation. No matter what stage you are in your relationship, you are far enough into it to have doubts. I would have sworn on everything I ever was that my husband was my soul mate- yet we still almost broke up. It's easy to see the stagnation, and focus on that rather than on the ways we can all improve. no matter who you are with, there will inevitably come a time when they/you just take things for granted. It sounds to me like you are feeling that way, and naturally your thoughts go to the other, unobtainable man --- who, if you think on it really hard without those blinders on, there were more than likely big red flags telling you the reasons you were not right for each other..... Relationships are not perfection. Neither is life- but I promise if you put effort into MAKING him put effort into it, *hahaha* things will improve. It's sort of true....I literally said that to my husband yesterday- I'm sorry i invite people over and FORCE you to entertain, or accept invitations and force us to attend- because if not for that, he would be content to stay at home, and tinker, and not talk to people outside of our little family, and he would quickly stagnate, and find himself with little by way of friends... it's really easy to do... and so, I offer you this because that is where we were just recently- we all need to be reminded there are other things outside our comfort zones.. and i wasn't really sorry- He was , though, happy that we do things.... that I initiate get togethers... it's good for our spirits as human beings.... It's up to both of you.. and yes, it starts with an open dialogue. There is hope yet.... Thanks for sharing.
I understand bright shiny and new- but I also understand deep shiny love. All have benefits and detriments, it's up to you where you place the valance. IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted August 03, 2011 12:57 AM
Just an update:Things have improved immensely with my fiance and the love of my life, Bri We've gotten on the same page, and while some things won't change, he is a more contented person overally lately, and we are stronger than ever as a couple. I no longer see any other road/path than the one I'm on, and that's major progress that settles my heart. We're spending more time together, and I've learned what activities are honestly not worth making a fuss over, like grocery shopping, cause he hates going and I love going, and when he's not there, he cannot complain about what I want to buy (which works since I've taken over the costs of food for our household). And to top it off, I've really confirmed, at least by gut and FB stalking, what I think is really going on with this other dude I thought I had feelings for: he's gay or bi-sexual, and still secretly dating the transgendered woman he used to live with in New Orleans. He's being so unclear about it all, and still appears so confused with who he is, I know I couldn't deal with being in his life right now, and once our banter is gone, I really don't know what foundation our friendship would have had...I haven't told him I'm done, but he hasn't exactly popped up again into my life either, so I'm letting it slowly fade away. He is still FB "friends" with my fiance Bri, which is weird, but I have broken all electronic ties, and as far as I am concerned, we really have nothing more to say to each other. He was a leech when we were friends, and I was more insecure about everything when I was around him or in contact with him, so we are better far far away from each other, for the mutual benefit. All in all, I am excitedly planning our wedding, and Bri and I can hardly believe it's only 11 weeks til our Scorpio wedding (10/29)!! I know no matter what comes in from the outside, we are meant to weather the storms and we both want to be in this relationship, and that is enough for me . Bri and I make a lovely team and I look forward to each day with him by my side. IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 140659 From: Your Friendly Neighborhood Juris Doctorate. Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 03, 2011 01:14 PM
------------------ "To avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing." Aristotle IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 474 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 03, 2011 01:48 PM
That's awesome news! We need to question things before they solidify!I'll be thinking about you on the 29th! IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted August 28, 2011 11:52 PM
Thanks, Randall and pixelpixie I'm gonna go ahead and vent a little more, mostly happy venting, wedding and so forth. I've no idea where to start as far as "wedding slips"/crinolines, and proper bras go, and the idea of dragging my dress around making sure everything fits together sounds exhausting and could cause damage to the dress....but it all has to be done before I can get the minimal alterations (a couple of darts in the bustline) done. Most bras designed to be worn with wedding dresses have a lot of structure to them, but the top of my dress is already a bit corset style, with boning and the like, so anything else constricting me sounds like overkill Dumb dress...::rolls eyes:: I like you well enough, especially with all the beading (it makes my Leo Venus happy) on the upper portion), now just make my bust look good and we'll be all set, LOL. And yeah, sticking with a wedding day hairstyle, yeah, not happening...the mane must be shown off, with my gorgeous natural curls and all, just not sure if I want to do something more subtle cause I'm also doing a slightly pillbox-style hat with a mesh veil-ish thing off the front. Very vintage, and very ME Yeah, and the RSVP deadline is coming up, and we've only got a third of the people letting us know, and almost none from my fiance's family... AHH...hehe! It's all good, it's all good IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted September 02, 2011 11:02 PM
I'm using this as a partial journal...just so tired today...so much to do, and so little time.:::sighs::: I love my life, just feel drained right now I need to find a little mental peace, a way to recharge, regain my vitality and zest for life...in my business, the one where I do mobile massage and work for myself, it's just sooo DEAD, and I feel lost without it. I'm sick of my part-time "rental" of my time to make others' businesses succeed as I feel deeply unappreciated, and undervalued. IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 140659 From: Your Friendly Neighborhood Juris Doctorate. Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 03, 2011 08:34 AM
When things are going well, it can be just as draining or more so. ------------------ I have CDO. It's like OCD, but the letters are in alphabetical order, as they should be. IP: Logged |
Virgo-AriesArtist Knowflake Posts: 1285 From: MidWest :) Registered: Jun 2009
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posted September 03, 2011 09:30 AM
Interesting thought to ponder, Randall Thanks IP: Logged | |