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Author
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Topic: He's Just Not that Into You
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23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:25 PM
 
Well there's many purposes to sex, one of them is intimacy and another procreation. There are many that just haven't come to my mind which others have said. For me the argument is not cut and dry, I'm just stating the cold hard biology without the psychology here.
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LadyNeptune
unregistered
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posted April 18, 2009 11:26 PM
23, I knew you would say that! But back in cavemen times, where this theory is supposed to spring from, didn't they raise their children as a clan?IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Knowflake Posts: 71
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:26 PM
ohh I hope when I said that one night stands aren't a big deal for every woman that it wasn't taken to mean that people should just go have unprotected and unsafe sex and get pregnant, etc.  That's a totally different issue. Of course, there are single mums and dad's out there (me being one of them for now) but ideally there should be a partnership raising a child - in my opinion. It's so difficult to do it alone. IP: Logged |
23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:27 PM
I should underly though that I think that biology is the primal motivator here. Biology moves through eras and epochs (lower frequency), psychology is kind of more the now (higher frequency). It depends on what wavelength you tune the radio to if you know what I mean. I think the disagreement here is people speaking at different wavelengths. IP: Logged |
Azalaksh
Moderator Posts: 316
From: New Brighton, MN, USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:30 PM
quote:
Women can keep going AND can have multiple orgasms that serve no procreative function. I'm actually reading a book on this (when I'm not arguing with Lara ). If anyone is interested, I'll go into further detail.
What book is it, Lady N??
With your mention of cavemen and clan, Earth's Children immediately springs to mind, where there were "Mother Festivals" and the women could choose any man or men to spend the festival night with.....
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23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:31 PM
quote:
23, I knew you would say that! But back in cavemen times, where this theory is supposed to spring from, didn't they raise their children as a clan?
Well thats a higher frequency issue that we are referring to. The procreation is the lower frequency. Cavemen helped raise children because they were "evolved" to. That is, a child's viability is greater when the father is around than when he is not. If father bails after honeymoon period, it would be no secret that this child would not be as "strong" as a child with a father. That is not to say that single-parented children are not as strong, I hope you know what I mean. If you have two functioning parents looking after a child, then it's better than one. Having a clan then further enhances this, where multiple adults raise a child. The weight of responsibility is spread. IP: Logged |
Azalaksh
Moderator Posts: 316
From: New Brighton, MN, USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:34 PM
It would certainly benefit both me and my son if there was a "village" or clan to help raise him 
Yes, two parents is ideal, but many of us have found that to be impossible at the present time.....IP: Logged |
23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:34 PM
Yes, Moonwitch, that was what I was trying to say in my argument. Raising a child by yourself as a single mother is a lot more onerous on the mother. If the single mother carries a lot of weight, then the mother is won't function as well as say with a functioning partner and the child will get less benefits. I do not in any way criticise single mothers, it is a very hard task and they should be commended. IP: Logged |
Glaucus
Knowflake Posts: 696
From: Sacramento,California
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:35 PM
cheshirecat,I fit that stuttering shy feminine male type. I have been hurt by a lot of females in the past. It's kinda like that I have been the female and they were the males. hahahahaha I do tend to get emotionally attached easily. I admit that I even get too easily to the point that I have set myself up for getting hurt. Of course, being an ultrasensitive person, I can get hurt easily. If I use my sensitivity in a positive way, I can be very caring,nurturing,attuned to the woman that I love.
I have learned my lesson, and so I am only interested in being with a spiritually oriented,ultrasensitive woman that is into the holistic,alternative,intuitive healing arts. I want to have a wife and children. I want a totally equal partnership. I don't care about head of the household crap. I am not into controlling others,and I don't want anybody controlling me.
I also believe in liberalism in all its forms. I don't think bad of women that are sexually liberal and have multiple sexual partners whether male,female, both.
I also support gay marriage. I look at it this way, I'd be very angry if I couldn't be in an interracial marriage. I was born from an interracial relationship,and so it's natural for me to be very interested in them. Therefore, I compare gay marriage bans as similar to interracial marriage bans. Both have been based on ideological views on bigotry and the relative belief of what's right and what's wrong connected to conservative religious beliefs.
Also interracial marriage rights pioneer,Mildred Loving (of June 12, 1967 Loving vs. Virginia Supreme Court ruling that struck down all interracial relationship laws in USA)supports gay marriage. She said that it was wrong to keep 2 people from loving each other because of their beliefs. I agree with her. I was born 4 years after the supreme court ruling.
I think that I was born to transcend stereotypes,boundaries,and bridge the gap between groups of people. Tolerance/Acceptance of diversity is the strongest theme in my life.
I believe in reincarnation. I believe that souls can incarnate as both genders, every ethnicity,race,etc.
therefore,
sexism,racism,homophobia,xenophobia,and all other kinds of bigotry seems VERY stupid to me.
this from a guy born in San Francisco,California
Raymond IP: Logged |
cheshirekat
unregistered
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posted April 18, 2009 11:36 PM
I agree with that Lucia. I guess thats why people say it's always important to find and love/respect yourself. No one in this world knows you better then yourself.Thats why some women such as my Aries Sun/Aquarius Moon friend is ok with just saultry hook ups because atleast in heart she feels she can handle that. As for me a Virgo Sun/Pisces Moon in my heart I know I can not do the same but that is just me. For all I know there's a Virgo Sun/Pisces Moon person knocking boots as I speak lol. IP: Logged |
Belage
Knowflake Posts: 81
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:39 PM
It's so funny to me how women want the right to go out in the world and hold jobs with equal pay for equal work with men, yet they want to act like little shy flowers when it comes to dating and sex. They have to be pursued, and of god forbid they actually go after a guy they want.Cleopatra didn't wait for Cesar and Mark Anthony to pursue her. She SEDUCED them and history was made. lol. I would have loved to see her chart. IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Knowflake Posts: 71
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:40 PM
haha!I'm an Aries Sun / Aquarius moon. IP: Logged |
cheshirekat
unregistered
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posted April 18, 2009 11:40 PM
Glacus, I feel like such an arse doing what I did that whenever they come to me to talk about dating, heartaches, or love I listen now and I am glad they forgave me because they really were good guys.Lol Moonwitch, you must be a wild fun loving one like my best friend. IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Knowflake Posts: 71
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:41 PM
quote:
It's so funny to me how women want the right to go out in the world and hold jobs with equal pay for equal work with men, yet they want to act like little shy flowers when it comes to dating and sex. They have to be pursued, and of god forbid they actually go after a guy they want.
You are generalizing I think there are far more women out there these days that have no problem going after a man. I've asked PLENTY of men out. IP: Logged |
Glaucus
Knowflake Posts: 696
From: Sacramento,California
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:43 PM
"It's so funny to me how women want the right to go out in the world and hold jobs with equal pay for equal work with men, yet they want to act like little shy flowers when it comes to dating and sex. They have to be pursued, and of god forbid they actually go after a guy they want."Yeah...I am a very shy flower man. I'd love for women to go after a guy they want. Meghann's concerns about her mother interfered with her doing that with me. Fears (hers),hate(her mom's) overcame love.
very sad.
Raymond
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23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:44 PM
quote:
Cleopatra didn't wait for Cesar and Mark Anthony to pursue her. She SEDUCED them and history was made. lol. I would have loved to see her chart.
Seduction is not pursuing. Seduction is being passive in a non-moving aggressive way. They are still moving to her, she did not chase them, they chased her after she laid the bait. IP: Logged |
Glaucus
Knowflake Posts: 696
From: Sacramento,California
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:44 PM
accidental double post
sorry
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MoonWitch
Knowflake Posts: 71
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:44 PM
Should add that I had to learn how to ask men out otherwise I'd almost never have had a date. IP: Logged |
23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:47 PM
Guys respond to very direct verbal communication like "Please come on a date with me" rather than "I think it might be a good idea to go on a date with me". You have to be very directive for the most part. IP: Logged |
23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:48 PM
Or "would you like to go out sometime?" That way ball is in their court but it's a clear question. IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Knowflake Posts: 71
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:51 PM
Oh - there was a time when I was a young goth that I would go up to an attractive young man at a club and say:"hi! You're so cute/great dancer/etc. Do you think I'm cute?" if they said yes then: "Are you single?" if they said yet then: "Are you gay?" If they said no then I'd ask if they wanted a drink or wanted to dance.
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Lucia23
Knowflake Posts: 669
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:53 PM
MoonWitch, that's so cool and so Aqua/Aries!
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MoonWitch
Knowflake Posts: 71
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 18, 2009 11:57 PM
Well, it always worked if they were actually single and straight In fact, I think my current relationship is the only serious one I've had where he winked first (literally - we met on Match.com). Then we chatted online a while and he asked me out first. That was nice. IP: Logged |
23
Knowflake Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 19, 2009 12:01 AM
Well you could still try that type of talk MW, it still would work I would think, it's a good strategy. IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Knowflake Posts: 71
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 19, 2009 12:03 AM
I don't think I'll need to again. I'm more in love than I've ever been.IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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