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Topic: How Does Pluto in Synastry Feel?
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Dy-na-mi-tee
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posted June 20, 2010 06:08 AM
  
Ami  The Pluto-Scorpio-SN point seems easy for me.
It feels easy to be sexual - This is happening in my 5th house - so it's easy to do this - just for *fun*.. I'm referring to anything sexual including verbal-psychological things (not necessarily sex per se). This is my way of running from problems and the rest of the world. The Venus-NN point is a little "flakey".. There is no better word for it. The Venus-NN wants to be pretty, beautiful, cordial - sociable (it's in the 11th house). I can be this way but it's always a little difficult. The NN is a point you *learn* as you go. My Plutonian side wants none of this. My Plutonian side wants to show up at a "black tie" social function with dark gothic make-up, naked, in full body paint. My Pluto wants to shock and destroy anything superficial.. My Venus loves the superficial and sees beauty in it. It's actually an annoying tug of war. In some situations I go with Venus and others I go with Pluto. There is seldom a compromise. I think the result is that many people (in particular men) are confused by me: "How could that pretty little thing, turn into T-Rex" lol Another way this played out romantically is that -- For a very long time I thought power-plays made the world go round.. As long as I teased and played with men, they'd be there for me.. They'd follow me around. I know it sounds pathetic. This was me as a teenager by the way (so a few years back). After certain things in my life.. after losing important people I cared about - I changed because I realized, true love is about giving in & being honest - not trying to "control". IP: Logged |
Dy-na-mi-tee
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posted June 20, 2010 06:13 AM
PA - quote:
he threatened to kill himself. I was so tired of him and the whole dynamic by that stage that I just told him that I didn't care.
wow It's crazy how it happened to you as well. I wonder if it's a habitual thing with these aspects. I did care about this guy. But it was also the context.. He left a message on my cell and I woke up in the morning to his drunken voice - He went from crying to laughing and saying it was over for him. He said he was on the jetty and would jump. It was a pretty cold and stormy night. I looked for him everywhere the next day. There was no sign of him for a couple of days and his parents were worried (he was 18 at the time). Eventually we found him living under a bench. IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
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posted June 20, 2010 06:26 AM
Well, this one knocked on my door wanting to know where I'd been all night. He must have been waiting for me, watching from somewhere, because I had been out all night - with friends. And he was demanding wanting to know who I was with, etc. He was always hugely jealous and possessive like that which is what I couldn't stand, amongst other things. And to this day, any signs of jealousy and possessiveness makes me want to run away from a man. I was so angry that he was at my door and he was asking me to marry him and I was saying no, go away, I mean, I was brutal with him telling him "I don't want you", really really blunt (Aries Merc) and then he comes out with this threat and I was already furious and just wanted him to go away.In the synastry my Pluto was completely unaspected. His Sun & Pluto were opposite my Moon, and his Mars opposite my Venus and Merc. His Moon was also conjunct my NN. His Mars conjunct my Venus and his Venus & Uranus conjunct my IC. His Saturn trine my Mars. Natally, he had a Moon-Sun opposition, Moon-Chiron square, and Sun-Pluto conjunction. He was a Leo Sun, Pisces Moon. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 20, 2010 09:20 AM
quote:
The Pluto-Scorpio-SN point seems easy for me.
It feels easy to be sexual -
I will trade you Mars in Cancer for this 
Ami
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Ami Ann
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posted June 20, 2010 09:23 AM
quote:
DynThat's interesting. I was with someone whose Pluto (and Sun) opposed my Moon and even though at times I really hated him and hated being with him, it was a very hard tie to break, but when I did (and it was very definite and final) he threatened to kill himself. I was so tired of him and the whole dynamic by that stage that I just told him that I didn't care.
PA
In this scenario--the personal planet was the more balanced one. It is good to see it can go both ways lol x o Ami IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 20, 2010 09:27 AM
quote:
Ami The Pluto-Scorpio-SN point seems easy for me.
It feels easy to be sexual - This is happening in my 5th house - so it's easy to do this - just for *fun*.. I'm referring to anything sexual including verbal-psychological things (not necessarily sex per se). This is my way of running from problems and the rest of the world. The Venus-NN point is a little "flakey".. There is no better word for it. The Venus-NN wants to be pretty, beautiful, cordial - sociable (it's in the 11th house). I can be this way but it's always a little difficult. The NN is a point you *learn* as you go. My Plutonian side wants none of this. My Plutonian side wants to show up at a "black tie" social function with dark gothic make-up, naked, in full body paint. My Pluto wants to shock and destroy anything superficial.. My Venus loves the superficial and sees beauty in it. It's actually an annoying tug of war. In some situations I go with Venus and others I go with Pluto. There is seldom a compromise. I think the result is that many people (in particular men) are confused by me: "How could that pretty little thing, turn into T-Rex" lol Another way this played out romantically is that -- For a very long time I thought power-plays made the world go round.. As long as I teased and played with men, they'd be there for me.. They'd follow me around. I know it sounds pathetic. This was me as a teenager by the way (so a few years back). After certain things in my life.. after losing important people I cared about - I changed because I realized, true love is about giving in & being honest - not trying to "control".
This is fascinating, Dyn.It opens up possibilities to me about the NN I never knew.
Pluto trines my NN in Sag in the 2nd house. I crave Taurus/second house energy--earthbound, grounded energy.
I crave the Sag spirit--courageous, individualistic, bold, adventurous.
A Pluto trine ,thankfully, must be giving me the power to get there if I will reach out for it.
Is that how you would interpret the Pluto trine NN? Thanks so much,
Ami PS I can see that dichotomy in you--now that you mention it.
I can see you in an elegant gown or as a goth lol. I can sense the power/Pluto and the social grace/Venus.
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Ami Ann
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posted June 20, 2010 09:39 AM
quote:
Yes good aspects good, bad aspects bad.
You gotta harness in the good energy. Block out the bad.
Harness energy, block bad.
Alf, If you ever find a way to wipe off the bad aspects ---you got a world class invention on your hands  Ami IP: Logged |
amowls*
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posted June 20, 2010 10:50 AM
Everyone my age has Pluto sextile Neptune, so there's always that in my relationships lol. But since it's a sextile, it's not going to be so obvious or intense, especially because it is generational.My last relationship was very plutonian themed. My Pluto squared his Venus and opposed his Mars by almost exact degrees. He was obsessive and though he was never really violent, I was afraid that he would be at some point. It wasn't a very happy relationship. My current boyfriend's Venus and Mars both square my Pluto and somehow it's not as scary. I guess because my current boyfriend is a kitten. I've noticed that I'm dating all these guys with Pluto squares to their love planets... Pluto is transiting my 7th. IP: Logged |
raspberri
Knowflake Posts: 2550
From: venus
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted June 20, 2010 01:28 PM
In my experience it's Pluto who is crazy about the other. But then again I remember someone who had his Venus conjunct my Pluto and he went gaga for me. But I think that might have also been his Progressed Moon exact on my Venus when we met...So I'm going to say Pluto is the one obsessed. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 20, 2010 01:57 PM
It is interesting about who is the most obsessed.
Every discussion I have seen has people on both sides.
I was contemplating it, today, and I think the Pluto person is in the drivers seat and the planet person is obsessed.
x o x o Ami
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hodad
Knowflake Posts: 321
From: tiburon ca usa
Registered: May 2009
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posted June 20, 2010 09:28 PM
I think the obsession can work both ways,but it seems to me like the Sun person finds the Pluto person compelling in some way,and mysterious.At least that's the way it works for me.I have Pluto in 4 degrees of Virgo in the 12th and have always been drawn to the early mutable signs.One boyfriend who was an early Gemini,all light and chatty,was drawn to me partly because it seemed as if there was something hidden,and maybe a little dark about me,and he was just drawn in.It's like I had some secrets or something.There was a just a compulsive almost subconcious pull on both parts.No I wouldn't say it got nasty. I have had other romantic relationships where I have had warm feeling for the other person and there were nice aspects but when I had a Sun/Pluto aspect in synastry with someone it was just so much more intense for some reason.I have always had strong feelings for early Virgos,early Pisces,early Sags,and especially early Geminis--don't know exactly why.
I think other synastry aspects with Pluto have a similar feel,like Venus/Pluto,Moon/Pluto,Pluto conjuncting someone's nodes,or their ascendant.I think Mars/Pluto can get a little nasty,as there often seem to be power struggles,jealousies,and more aggression involved.I just think Pluto by its very nature is obsessive.IP: Logged |
MysticMelody
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posted June 20, 2010 09:44 PM
I always get his Pluto conjunct my Venus and therefore his Pluto square my moon. It causes a great attraction on my part that takes me through Hell (the aspect Pluto square moon does that it says) and then we drift away but I still hold love in my heart for him. I don't think Pluto cares one bit about any of this but has fun toying with me and enjoying my attentions and love while my attraction lasts.IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 20, 2010 10:18 PM
quote:
I don't think Pluto cares one bit about any of this but has fun toying with me and enjoying my attentions and love while my attraction lasts.
Pluto is a hard task master.
You have to face what he wants you to face. You don't have to sell all you own and go to the mountain top but you better not refuse to face what is inside you.
That is Pluto to me.
Ami
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Dy-na-mi-tee
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posted June 20, 2010 10:41 PM
On one of the many other Pluto threads we've had - I'm pretty sure someone was saying that the person who is already "Plutonian" - who has Pluto aspects in natal - might feel the attraction more strongly.
So that's another possibility ^Mystic Melody - I think Pluto does care but he/she is insecure... They don't want to lose the other person and they think the best way to never lose someone psychologically-emotionally is by hurting them.
The other person is then sure to feel something for you (possibly forever). Whether they feel love or hate - or a bit of both, it's always intense. Pluto just doesn't want to be forgotten. What would hurt them most is if the other person felt *nothing* - neutrality. :edit: (When the Pluto person hurts you, it's likely to b something significant - that wouldn't fade away in your memory.) It takes an emotionally mature Pluto person to rein in these insecurities. When Pluto *gives* something (like love) - they're afraid the other planet will take it all and run with it. Pluto thinks they always have to manipulate (give a little and take a little) in order to *keep* the other's interest. This is only a mild problem with the positive aspects ^ But usually the personal planet can soothe Plutonian fears away. It is a *serious* problem with the negative aspects though. When his Pluto was opposite my Venus - he was sure that I was the female version of Casanova.. and that as soon as he gave an "inch" he'd become another conquest & be forgotten. His paranoia froze him. He often thought he wasn't as "good looking", as "attractive" etc.. and that was another reason for his insecurity. Pluto wants to always be in control.. If they "give in" - they're *open* to hurt. Unlike Neptune - Pluto is not happy to sacrifice anything in the name of love.. Their own survival is more important. The love they offer is always conditional, in order to maintain control. Venusian love is also conditional because Venus demands appreciation for her favors. I think part of the lesson with this particular aspect - is to love unconditionally. hodad - About Sun-Pluto, my mum and step dad have this.. exact in Leo. Her Sun and His Pluto. To be honest, their relationship is not all that intense. They are more like good friends. There was some intensity in the very beginning but it has strongly died down. It's actually strange to me - I was very surprised they had this aspect, and so close. IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
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Registered: Apr 2009
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posted June 20, 2010 11:47 PM
"The other person is then sure to feel something for you (possibly forever). Whether they feel love or hate - or a bit of both, it's always intense. Pluto just doesn't want to be forgotten. What would hurt them most is if the other person felt *nothing* - neutrality."This is VERY VERY true. Whenever Pluto is activated in Synastry it's impossible for me to remain freiends either way (and I have Venus in the 11th so I end up feeling bad). Luckily though it hasn't happned where I feel VERY intense for someone (and I have moon square pluto, and my pluto is in the 5th so it can be VERY intense). I have a recent ex and even now he's literally won't respond back to anything I do. Keep in mind all I have done is say that I hope all is well for him, and that I hoped we could be friends. Even if it's like a quick text saying hope your new job went well. And he's an Aquarius...and even he said he can't do friends with me, it's too awkward. For better or worse we can't be friends. So we haven't been. I of course am very hurt by this and do think of him every day. I don't miss our relationship, I miss our friendship (again my Venus in the 11th, and some of his planets overlay my 11th house), which he says we never were friends. The opposite side of it is feelings were told a few weeks ago and after that he just flat out can't deal with me. I suppose dealing with me as a friend won't happen...as it makes him feel stuff he doesn't want to for me. And then being in a relationship with me opens him up to being vulnerable and he couldn't have that either. So either way I'm out of luck lol. Which sucks because I had a feeling that we could have been really good friends. But oh well. Edit to add on June 22, 2010
The Aquarius actually just deleted me from Facebook. We haven't spoken in how long, and he did this. I'm not exactly sure why he did it. But I do know our Pluto Opposite Moon synastry aspect reared its ugly head and I called him and left him an earfull lol. IP: Logged |
MysticMelody
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posted June 21, 2010 12:04 AM
Ami and Dyna, thank you for your responses. They were brilliant and I loved reading them and meditating on your thoughts.Dyna, the info about both being selfish in different ways may have been the most excellent piece of information I have received in a looooong time. You have shared a great insight/key with me. I am extremely grateful, especially at this time. Thanks very much 
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Ami Ann
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posted June 21, 2010 03:20 AM
Thank you (((Mystic)))
When I read your response, I realized that
Pluto does not make you DO anything as far as crazy, nutty things lol but he makes you face your own nature.
I was thinking of your boyfriend, Mystic.He could have learned the lessons of his own fear and insecurity without acting it out with you.
Ami
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staborgi
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posted June 21, 2010 10:47 AM
Ami- I think your deacriptions of those aspects sound right. Although, speaking as the pluto in a moon/pluto square, I gotta say I'm not so comfortable with the Pluto stuff. This relationship also has a close mars/Pluto conjunction in which I'm the mars, so the mutual Pluto activation just feels super heavy. I think my Pluto- feelings of wanting dig really deep into his emotional makeup, know him inside and out but also mixed with some judgemental stuff, wanting to "clean out" anything I feel like his superficial on his part- is a bit scary to him (and me) because I can't seem to control myself in wanting deep, heavy things from him and in some ways, because of the kind of incessant pressure of Pluto, I feel really controlling and demanding toward him. At the same time, I feel like he can be like that too, particularly at times when I feel most personally assertive. It's kind of aggravating because that energy feels inherently independent and not relationshipy and I think his Pluto kind of wants to "own" me in the exact way I'm keen to resist. I feel like the needy aspects of the moon, even in hard aspect, blends well with Pluto because pluto wants the
moon and the moon is feeling kind of tender, exposed, vulnerable, etc and will possibly want to be enveloped by Pluto. This has been my experience anyway (I had an exact moon/Pluto in a composite and felt like I really identified with the moon in that case, and am recognizing that in this other relationship with him being the moon). I think it's really easy for the moon to get scared and back away at times from pluto.IP: Logged |
staborgi
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posted June 21, 2010 10:49 AM
Ps curious about your experience with that exact mars/Pluto! IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 21, 2010 11:33 AM
I am not sure if you mean the conjunctions with my parents lol or the square in synastry.
I will tell you about both.
Both of my parents have THEIR Pluto's in exact conjucntion with my Mars.
This was an awful squelching of my drives in life--the basic primal drives you need to live lol
I had to push these away and become the weakest parts of myself cuz then I was safe from intrusion by my parents.
They pushed me down when I was strong but let me be when I was weak.
Of course, the parent/child relationship is not one of peers .The Pluto/mars square in synastry feels like it could go too far if you let your ego run things.
I think you HAVE to have your better sense/spirituality on top of Pluto cuz Pluto cannot run the show in a safe way.
x o x Ami PS To be more specific-
Pluto square Mars brings up your deepest,most vulnerable selves. You can get hurt easily and hurt someone else easily.
It can go too far--verbally- and even, perhaps ,physically if you run with your feelings.
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Ruben
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posted June 22, 2010 12:20 AM
Pluto/Moon doesn't feel tender to m,e, but then again, it depends on how you perceive. One characteristic of Pluto that I really like is that it can be tender, soft and subtle, and overwhelming and emotionally powerful at the same time. Pluto's subtlety, especially in an aspect with Moon, seems very powerful to me.IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 22, 2010 07:42 AM
What a wonderful description, Ruben. It brought up a picture of Michael Corleone in Godfather 2,in particular. You could see the range of emotion on his face from pure strength to tenderness. Ami IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 22, 2010 07:58 AM
This is just about Pluto--in general. I have been afraid of the Pluto range of feelings.
The power and strength is unique.
It is the power of Schindler in Schindler's list to go against a regime where he could have lost his life at any minute.
It is power to go against the norm. I have Pluto conjunct the MC.
I KNOW I have this power inside me but I am afraid of it.
I am much more afraid of being strong that being weak.
It is like the dog who rolls over when the other dog's approach.
That rolling over makes the other dogs leave him alone.
I had a big,Standard Poodle who would roll over when a little Beagle puppy approached lol.
Your self esteem--you build and you can retain it even if the outside is against you. Ami
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Ruben
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posted June 22, 2010 08:55 AM
There's nothing to be afraid of. I have major Pluto influence in my chart and it's true it can get overwhelming at times, but I think it's a matter of control. Pluto represents very strong energy and it needs to be channeled appropriately, so if the "filter" is not right, then it becomes overwhelming. Handling Pluto influence is like tightrope walking while holding scales. LOL, bad metaphor, but you know what I mean. You have to have a clear image of where you are going and to be able to maintain your balance.Also, another thing I find interesting about Pluto is that it is very dual. It can be negative or positive depending on how you use its influence, but its nature is fluid, in the sense that it has massive potential for transformation. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted June 22, 2010 03:36 PM
Thank you (((Ruben)) Ami IP: Logged |
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