posted November 01, 2011 02:10 PM            

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
I thought this was a myth...

Ive secretly been keeping mental notes about my boyfriend. I've noticed he can be quite manipulative emotionally... for example he resorts to sulking. A lot. Whenever he doesn't get something he wants...

He can be subtly demanding... the other night he didn't ask me by the way, he just said "Can you buy me some food?" I didn't say anything nor did I agree to so when I went to his place he got upset was quiet and started sulking. I asked if he was okay and he said "yeah" obviously he wasn't. That's when he said, "I don't think you care about me." I said "What? Yes I do." He said "Are you sure? You didn't get me food to eat. I'm starving babe. I haven't eaten a lot in days." And he went on about how I'm being a bad girlfriend because I'm neglecting him!! Wtf! I knew he was emotionally toying with me, he can also be demanding which I find weird. And he does the sulkin thing where he starts whining a little bit and says I don't love/care about him when he places demands on me without my approval he just expects me do things he asks sometimes little things not big things. He also does things for me I dont ask for sometimes. I read that cancer placements sometimes do things for loved ones, and than expect them to return the favor??

I called him today, and asked if he ate and he said no. I don't know his financial situation, but now I feel bad. I'm very stingy with my money and sometimes I truly don't feel like spending a cent on anyone but myself... but I feel bad so I promised the next time I see him I would buy him food.

But generally do cancer placements act like this???? They act clingy and can use emotional manipulation (sulking, saying you don't care/love me just to gain reassurance) I find that I have to reassure him a lot kind of like a mother would to their child.... He acts very stoic and mature and independent but once he's with me he brings out this side I never expected- childlike, innocent, vulnerable, etc.

Here's his chart
Sun 18°24' Gemini
Moon 9°49' Cancer
Mercury 7°10' Cancer
Venus 22°38' Cancer
Mars 23°07' Я Capricorn
Jupiter 21°08' Pisces
Saturn 5°30' Я Sagittarius
Uranus 20°28' Я Sagittarius
Neptune 4°53' Я Capricorn
Pluto 4°53' Я Scorpio
Chiron 16°00' Gemini
Ceres 11°57' Virgo
Pallas 9°26' Leo
Juno 8°01' Я Sagittarius
Vesta 6°19' Aries
Node 28°49' Я Aries
Lilith 18°11' Gemini
Fortune 29°22' Sagittarius
AS 20°46' Capricorn
MC 17°00' Scorpio
°'
Idk if you want to see house placements

But in a way I do like taking care of him... I've always wanted to be in a relationship where I was the maternal one, where I'm depended on... idk I won't ever admit this to him or anyone offline. But do you guys have experience with people with cancer placements? And this? Because I dont know how handle their sulking...

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this sounds so much like me and my ex! Minus the passive aggression...he just got plain aggressive if I didn't buy him something. My ex was also a Gemini Sun, Cancer Moon and Mercury.

The dudes I've met with Cancer Mercury...have been disgustingly manipulative...so when I see that placement in guys...I can't help cringing. You could think it would work since I have Taurus Mercury.

But not all Cancer Moons are like this. My dad has Cancer Moon...and he never put my Cappy moon mom though that kind of crap. My mom is the bread winner and my dad is also a workaholic and doesn't ask much of my mom at all.

I'm the kind of person who wants to help those I care about...as long as the person doesn't become demanding of it...cause if they do I will definitely end up resenting the person.

posted November 01, 2011 02:11 PM            

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
Not trying to be rude but I too have the biggest eye roll..
People that sulk are NOT in pain. At least he was not! Wailing for help crying for help maybe thats someone in pain, but sulking does not mean someone is in pain, it means they are too passive aggressive and would rather resort to little games to vie for your attention. Simple as that. Add to the fact that I *knew* what he was doing, which solidified my reaction in not really giving a rats ***.. because he HAD food! But if he is hungry I will go out and buy him food, but how he went about it was extremely immature in my honest opinion. He didn't have to sulk up and about. And when I ask whats wrong, "Nothing." he just lays there clearly pouting. But for once at least he tried to tell me how he felt even though I disagreed, maybe he was joking about calling me a bad girlfriend who knows. But LOL my reaction to sulking is equatable to staring at the wall, really.. If I notice he is sulking over something significant than of course yup I will go out my way to make him feel better, but what he did? Sorry that didn't really deserve my empathy.

It doesn't break my heart either to see someone sulking even someone I love. Know what it does? disappoints me, to the point where I just cannot respond, followed by "Let me know when you are done." Seriously.

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I know, I get it. It's quite childish to sulk and naive to give into the game each time.

posted November 01, 2011 02:16 PM            

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Originally posted by Stawr:

The dudes I've met with Cancer Mercury...have been disgustingly manipulative...so when I see that placement in guys...I can't help cringing. You could think it would work since I have Taurus Mercury.

I'm the kind of person who wants to help those I care about...as long as the person doesn't become demanding of it...cause if they do I will definitely end up resenting the person.

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One, I second your cringing at Cancer Mercuries. They're never 100% honest, and that's a big deal to me being an Aries with Merc. in Aries!

Two, your attitude about give/take is a healthy one. Kudos to you.

posted November 01, 2011 03:10 PM            

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Originally posted by hannarama:
One, I second your cringing at Cancer Mercuries. They're never 100% honest, and that's a big deal to me being an Aries with Merc. in Aries!

Two, your attitude about give/take is a healthy one. Kudos to you.

I also think the Gemini sun adds or influences the Cancer moon with a nervous energy. Geminis are also into mind games to get what they want (I think I can say this, I have Gemini rising and the urge to manipulate, although not malicious or for malicious reasons, comes very naturally to me) They're straightforward and then when they're upset they're crafty in their wording so you really believe it's your fault. Add this to a Cancer moon who reacts that way when unhappy and you have childish adult on your hands.

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Thankfully, I recognize it and I dont let them manipulate me.

posted November 01, 2011 03:57 PM            

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
Thankfully, I recognize it and I dont let them manipulate me.

I wasn't ware that Cancer Mercuries could be manipulative though. Gosh now I am getting nervous.

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posted November 01, 2011 04:20 PM            

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
Ahhh.. so that's what it is... food = love.
When we first met, he brought me a loaf of bread... I thought it was the weirdest thing ever. You know I expected well not really expected because I didn't expect him to give me gifts but you know I thought he brought me flowers or chocolates or a necklace who knows! he bought me a loaf of bread! I Said "erm.. thanks..." it was weird. This was when we first met, literally the second day...... hahaha so maybe you're spot on the with food.

The same day, the day he wanted me to buy him food and I didn't, same night he woke up, and he made me food. I didn't ask him for it, he just decided "Okay babe I'm going to make you some food!" I ate it anyways... deep down I thought it was very sweet of him. So I think you are right about food =love or their way of showing they love you... if only I knew that before I wouldn't have been weirded out by him buying me food unexpectedly as gifts I truly though "is this guy making fun of me? telling me I'm too small and need to eat more??!" I also didn't eat his loaf of bread because I thought he was trying to drug me, you know he maybe put something in their to make me like him. because at first I couldn't Stand him, not one bit. The first time we met yeah i thought he was hot and I wanted to "get with him" but after ONE tiny little show of interest he flooded me with this sudden surge of love and romance it freaked me out to tears I wasn't used to this kind of behavior. He told me he was a Gemini and I didn't believe him at all, I made a face and he thought I thought he was a cheater because of the stereotype, I didn't want to tell him upfront "no.. I don't believe you're a Gemini because you seem VERY cancerian to me." the clinginess, jealousy, in your face with romantic gestures add the fact that we weren't even dating yet lol! like this guy was really into me and it put me off because it was startling and something I wasn't used to.. but as time went on I slowly liked him and voila a year later we are together.

I thought it was just me that noticed it but you are right.. the child like behavior, they act silly really innocent and I agree it can be really sweet and adorable.. but frustrating at the same time because it's like dealing with a real live child.. I do think after this i will know how raise children honestly LOL! I do find it very endearing though because deep down inside I can be a kid too and I longed to find someone that can allow meto be childlike it's just my personality although I hide it..

lol emotional blackmail! What did your husband say? I'm excited to hear how he tried to emotionally blackmail you over monopoly.

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LMAO.......you are so funny. I Love how you tell stories, it makes me laugh and its hilarious that he got you bread on your first date. I am telling you he was testing you with the food thing...

the monopoly thing, I can't remember, I just remember laughing bc I was thinking to myself that is so his moon in cancer combined with his Taurus rising since monopoly has to do with financial security (taurus rising) and then trying to use emotional blakckmail for me to trade a card with him I saw it as his moon in cancer. I thought it was funny/cute bc is in the context of a game but outside of the context of game is not as funny..

posted November 01, 2011 11:06 PM            

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Originally posted by amelia28:
LMAO.......you are so funny. I Love how you tell stories, it makes me laugh and its hilarious that he got you bread on your first date. I am telling you he was testing you with the food thing...

the monopoly thing, I can't remember, I just remember laughing bc I was thinking to myself that is so his moon in cancer combined with his Taurus rising since monopoly has to do with financial security (taurus rising) and then trying to use emotional blakckmail for me to trade a card with him I saw it as his moon in cancer. I thought it was funny/cute bc is in the context of a game but outside of the context of game is not as funny..

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I'm glad my stories make you laugh!
Maybe he was testing me. you're most likely right. But what kind of test is that? Now I personally go out of y way to buy/bring him food. I'm still going to confront him gently about the emotional manipulation.

Your husband was funny! It looked like wheat bread with raspberry in it if I could remember hahaha

posted November 01, 2011 11:06 PM            

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Originally posted by hannarama:
Does he have Mercury in Cancer? I didn't notice. You have to realize there's balance to everything to. And Cancers aren't manipulative the same way Capricorns are. It's not as dark or long-term/ish. More of in the moment and they just want you to respond because any kind of response as long as it's a strong one, shows them you care.

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posted November 02, 2011 12:02 AM            

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Originally posted by Libreo:
Sorry I don't have anything interesting /helpful to say but the loaf of bread.....LOL!!!!! God love his lil cotton socks....LMAO!!!!

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posted November 02, 2011 12:47 AM            

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Libreo:
[b]Sorry I don't have anything interesting /helpful to say but the loaf of bread.....LOL!!!!! God love his lil cotton socks....LMAO!!!!

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I brought it home and it sat there on the table and rotted. my mother asked if I was going to eat it, I told my Pisces sister about the situation she thought it wa so romantic and cute and I thought "This is crazy and he is crazy! He mustve put something in it." She believed he was a genuinely good guy that I wasn't used to his odd romantic gestures, I was like "hell keep this man away from me first he gives me drugged bread what else is next?" back then I realize how silly I was being. And he did ask me if I enjoyed the bread LOL.. never touched the thing..... he must've thought it was the most romantic thing ever, whereas I thought I had to run far for the hills, I misconstrued his gestures in the beginning when we first started dating.. he was very in your face about romance and I was so awkward, way too serious and intellectual about it. He is a very big man (height wise, around 6'3") and I'm only 5'1" LOL! i remember he used to follow me around the library, and he "bumped" into me no he just wanted anyway to make physical contact, I was not only afraid of this giant, but I was petrified of his overt displays of romance and affection towards me... the loaf of bread made me wince inside, the whole "I gotta show the entire room this girl is mine" made me cry a little too. But I look back and think " I found myself rolling my eyes at nearly every gesture he did because it was sp showy, and obnoxious and made a scene, but i somewhere deep inside appreciated it but back then it all made me uncomfortable he was so in your face about it. i think back and he just really liked me, and I was being a btch sort of..." I will never tell him about the loaf of bread though I think he will be sad LOL[/B][/QUOTE]

This story is super romantic and funny!...great for a romantic comedy with a little bit of drama here and there is how I would describe your relationship with him. It would be an original movie bc your personality and his are so different that it would result in a lot of original funny scenes like your entire first date and the things that crossed your mind through out the date and you add whatever he was thinking, good material for a romantic comedy! LOL