posted December 10, 2011 03:23 AM            

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Originally posted by mintgirl123:
OMG yeah! I've dated 3 cappies and they were all about thinking about the future.
All of them got serious way too fast! That's why I don't understand how some people can say cappy guys are confusing or scared of commitment. I think they CRAVE it like air or something LOL. One proposed, another was like discussing the distant future, another was all planning our schedules freaking one year in advance lol!

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posted December 10, 2011 03:27 AM            

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Originally posted by frankie2912:
Im a Capricorn sun (conjunct Neptune in Cap, sextile Pluto)

I do become possessive after having sex with someone..hell, I become possessive over EVERYTHING..my place of work, my house even if i'm just renting a room, etc..

I've learned to hide this from the guys I become involved with. Especially guys I'm only sexually involved with..I get possessive, jeaous, etc but I pretend that i'm not, I *act* the TOTAL opposite..aloof, detachd, unaffected....while secretly pining and boiling inside.

B*tch i know you weren't lookin at my man!!!!!!

I don't like things to get too serious, though. I like intensity and power play and all that but it never works out IN a relationship. In sex and "friends with benefits" it's fun but it destroys an actual relationship. I never expect anything to lead to anything super serious, especially NOT marriage!! That's not even an interest of mine. "All I want is to mess around..and I dont really care about, if you love me..hate me.."

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posted December 10, 2011 03:52 AM            

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Originally posted by mintgirl123:
Yeah I agree. I also think it's a sign of emotional maturity to voice the 'L' word later on.

Those that say I love you!!!! In like two weeks are reminiscent of like middle schoolers. You see it alot around youtube lol. The ones that 'type lyk dis' and say 'I love my boyfriend, wer gna be together 4eva'

lol

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posted December 10, 2011 07:22 AM            

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Originally posted by librarising:
Eventually we went on a date and I swear he wanted me to praise him like a god!

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LOL

posted December 10, 2011 01:42 PM            

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Originally posted by affy:
I have my Sun, Mars, Venus, Neptune, Uranus & ASC in Capricorn.. and yes, I am very possessive about the things and people in my life.
In fact, I just had a fight with a friend that I made about 3 months back only cuz I felt that she should hang out with me more than anybody else. It's a bit disturbing, but it only means that they love you so much.
Also, if you give them a boost once in a while saying "you are the closest friend i'll have" or something along those lines, I'm sure they'll stick to you and will try to control their possessiveness They won't do you any wrong even though they are possessive They just like you to know how much they value you, that's all!
So take it in a positive sense

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posted December 10, 2011 01:49 PM            

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Originally posted by RegardesPlatero:
*shrug* maybe so, but that's my honest feeling

It's just not something that I can take light-heartedly. I'm more relaxed about other things. I really can't argue with people who find my approach to these things 'intense': they're right. However, I don't feel like I have to apologize for it or change it; I don't pretend to be more relaxed or carefree on this subject and I know that I am very intense about it.

And, if you think about it, if a person creates a life through sex, eventually that person does create a death too, as the life created will eventually end. So, for me, there is a BIG connection between death and sex as well as a connection between life and sex.

Perhaps I do approach this area of life in a 'dark' way, perhaps even in an 'intense' way compared to other people, but it is what it is. I tend to find carelessness about sex and promiscuity to be disturbing, especially given all of the consequences that immediately jump into my mind. I am very sexually cautious, perhaps to a degree that other people find absurd or 'extreme' or whatever. I can't deny that.

I can't help but think of all of the consequences and risks and things that can and do go wrong. Frankly, I have a lot of goals and dreams for myself (Mars in Capricorn plus Neptune in Capricorn too, 2nd house). I'd rather not take huge risks that could end up derailing my hopes and dreams. My goals come first. I've seen too many people ruin their lives with sex--more specifically, how they have misused it and how they've brought on a lot of suffering, problems, and other issues. I don't want to end up like them.

But, given that I don't have a high sex drive, and given that romantic relationships don't interest me in real life (only in the abstract), it works out for me. If I had a higher sex drive or wanted to be married, it would be a huge problem, but it all works out. I don't want children either, so there's no reason for me to be in a sexual relationship--no 'practical' reason for it, so this also makes it a non-issue for me.

Marriage and children aren't right for everyone. I'm one of those people for whom it would not be right. I'm 100%+ sure about no children. If it wasn't for the threat of pregnancy/fertility, the threat of AIDS, other STDs, and if I had a higher sex drive, and if I didn't love and value my freedom, I'd be more torn about marriage, but, even those things changed, I still don't have the desire to get married. I don't know how else to explain it, really: the desire just does not exist.

Intense friendships and intense spirituality matter to me a lot--maybe that's where that energy goes. That's the best way that I can really describe it.

Lastly, I just want to thank you for your openness and honesty.

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You dont have to change your opinions or how you feel, and I apologize if you got that impression from me.I was only curious to why you had such a severe stance on something so beautiful.

posted December 10, 2011 06:10 PM            

The reason no one has fallen for you (as you said) may be bc your fears have created a thick wall around you where no one can get passed it? You can not truly love without letting the fear go, holding caution close to your heart and being alert at all times only creates distance btwn you and any boyfriend/partner. Bc in a way, how can someone truly love another, if the other person refuses to let them in?

I'm really sorry to hear about your past. I've had a bad past too. But seriously, I have refused for the past experiences to dictate how I will live my future. I want to be happy and free. Don't let the bad actions of other people control your life. They're not worth it.

I think it might be a good idea to address these fears and sort out of these underlying issues present in your heart with a good therapist? Then you will truly be able to embrace life with no reservations.

posted December 10, 2011 09:50 PM            

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Originally posted by RegardesPlatero:

2) Personal: have been sexually assaulted (by a man), sexually harassed (by a woman; other people have had similar experiences with her), and am very frequently street harassed (i.e., people give me unwanted sexual attention). The only time that men outside of my church, some men who come into my work, and service personnel talk to me is for one reason and one reason only: to get someone to hit and quit. Sometimes, even people who come into my place hit on me and it angers me because it's so unprofessional and inappropriate, though I did stand up for myself. I'm not comfortable going into more detail in public. It's painful for me to talk about.

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Your severity and yes IRRATIONAL stance in sex is because of this. Has nothing to do with astrology. I don't know if you sought out therapy but i really think you should.

I used to be like you not THAT severe, but it could explain why my libido is NOT so high.. I was sexually abused/molested when i was younger, my entire childhood basically taught me sex was violent, not pleasurable and "beautiful" i viewed sex as a way to use and hurt others just based of what I experienced and witnessed. Thats what we called Psychological abuse. That affected my entire perception of sex and intimacy with people. I'll be honest with you, I have never been as intimate if at all until this point in my life with the person I am with. Sex scared the sh*t out of me because I left all my issues around it unresolved, suppressed and it effected me. Couldn't get close to anybody, hated people touching me, never made physical contact with anyone, any guy that would express ANY level of sexual interest even if he was genuinely interested in me as a person would be written off my list etc. It was bad.. sex wasn't fun nothing centered around it was fun... Instead of enjoying it I dissociated or most people would call it disconnecting. And admittedly it has happened and still does happen time to time when i do get intimate with my boyfriend, but he knows, not in depth of my past but he knows what he has to know in order to understand, and he does help me heal. a lot. with his understanding and patience + therapy. So I DO understand where you are coming from.....

take this from someone that viewed sex as disgusting, unhealthy, wrong, and dangerous. I've learned that its not, when you meet someone that you CAN trust and that is patient with you. A lot of that isolated me. I would never go on dates on guys, ONE MAIN reason why I didn't go to my prom apart from not being interested, cause I knew sex would happen and I was never going to ******* have sex with a guy after all that I experienced. I literally thought anyone that wanted to have sex with me was a disgusting awful person and I didnt want NOTHING TO DO with them. So I know how you feel..

But your whole stance is most likely than not generated from your sexual history. You are free to feel what you feel however, im just gonna let you know its not entirely healthy to view sex that way. Its UNDERSTANDABLE why you do. But its not healthy. And this sounds cliche but don't let what others have robbed you of, makeup your entire view on something pleasant of course once you share it with the right person... !! I know you probably think "How does this 18 year old know all this **** ." I ask this sometimes myself too!

posted December 10, 2011 09:54 PM            

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Originally posted by athenegoddess:
Especially a set of rules that were intended to lead you from truth instead of towards it.

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Just like how it makes me rage a little when I heard here in Canada, when the government basically legalized in schools for children to LEARN about homosexuality etc. "Catholic/Christian" parents said that the govenemrn was not a good man of faith etc.

Im not bashing religion here but this kind of thinking just nullifies why I prefer not to believe in a set of rules to lead my life. If I am not mistaken, doesn't the bible/entire holy faith etc teach everyone to be accepting of one another? How are you doing that by shunning out something that is REAL AND here? Homosexuality, what people who people love who cares? It makes them happy, why impede on that. My family is strongly religious, everyone but me.

posted December 10, 2011 10:38 PM            

you are here because of sex. your parents F*CKED.

posted December 10, 2011 10:41 PM            

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Originally posted by frankie2912:
i hate the idea of "waiting until marriage". that implies that virginity is a thing that can be taken or given and that it's something special...which then implies that sex is not good.

you are here because of sex. your parents F*CKED.

get real, people. sex is our most basic creative urge..and it's fun, i feel sorry for those who find it dirty and shameful.

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posted December 10, 2011 10:46 PM            

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Originally posted by mintgirl123:
I find waiting till marriage an admirable idea IF the person views sex as sth important, NOT cos of religion or feeling like it's wrong to have it before getting hitched.

Personally I would try before I buy lol.

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Ya... no getting out of that one!

I agree. I mean i mostly have that idea (against people who are against premarital sex) if they only have that view based off of religion. it makes my shake my head intensely. LIke being ashamed of a natural urge means "god" will punish you. Wtf?

posted December 10, 2011 11:09 PM            

Anyone want to go up against the success of my marriage?

Continue talking smack all you want. .

Half of this forum is b1tching about relationships with a bunch of dickheads... So continue talking about f@cking them all you want.