posted April 08, 2012 04:53 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hskahn:

i think this is what i was trying to say. Like my friend seems to have no feel for it. she used to often ask "what are the rules" for this situation. she was always reading oprah to find out the rules for dating.

incredibly cool and intelligent--this fits, too. very in the head. hard to give good astro counseling for this.
i think the delay in love is hard to avoid because it takes some time to have experiences that will help. but i think if a person is willing to trust that they don't know then that helps the learning process. i don't think it is hopeless and maybe two venus retros would be good together?

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posted April 08, 2012 04:54 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by RedScorp:
Venus Retrograde in Scorpio...I don't even notice if there's any differences!

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posted April 08, 2012 04:59 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by enchantress299:
As per usual, this becomes a 'hate on those with this placement' thread instead of a forum for those who actually have the placement... I'm sorry that you all have had bad experiences with these people, but I can assure you that not all of us are manipulative, insecure, jealous, etc, etc, etc. Oh, AND I AM SICK OF HEARING HOW WE SCREWED PEOPLE OVER IN PAST LIVES AND NOW WE ARE PAYING FOR IT. I fully believe in past lives, but I think it is an improper assumption on anyone's part to tell me what my past lives were, thank you. It's not helpful to me in 'balancing my karma.'

I have Venus retrograde and I have answered this question in other threads... And here's my answer again:

[QUOTE]Eh. I know I've said it before elsewhere on these boards, but I'll repeat it (because I'm too lazy to find the link).

Venus retro is like watching everyone else move forward while you are standing still. It's an outside in mentality. For me to be successful in relationships and often with social graces, I have to actually THINK about it. It seems counter intuitive because it is. Otherwise I seem to blunder along in relationships without a clue or I simply don't try to have any relationship. I do better by observing what works for others first and then by trying to have my own experiences (and usually failing). I've gotten better over time, but it is very slow going. I always seem to think that my emotions show to everyone around me, but they don't, and I've had to learn better verbal communication skills when it comes to relationships... Otherwise I simply won't communicate.

Ultimately, in me, it is marked as an incurable shyness when it comes to relationships (though I am very social and bold by nature). Think Raj from the Big Bang Theory. I'm not so bad I can't talk to guys... I just feel like I can't communicate romantic feelings a lot of times... And oh yes, alcohol helps.

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posted April 08, 2012 05:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by jcweimpw:
I always seem to pick the wrong person to try to have a relationship with and I always get hurt.

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posted April 08, 2012 05:08 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
Do you guys think Venus retro is a marker for being shy?

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posted April 08, 2012 08:16 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
Do you guys think Venus retro is a marker for being shy?

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posted April 08, 2012 12:23 PM            

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Although, doesn't everyone have to think before they act? Or at least they should haha.

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NO. And what I mean by that is, whenever I'm considering going into a relationship, I have usually considered all factors and all angles of my personality and the other person's personality, and I usually have this strange ability to see ten steps in advance (kind of like playing chess, if I were good at it), and so when I see major incompatibilities, I tend to walk away before even trying to engage in a relationship. I think this is part and parcel of Virgo Venus retro- rationalizing.

But I've had friends who will simply jump into relationships with anyone and be purely natural at it. Sure he's an ex-con and is sketchy in his behavior... But I LOVE him! Sure she's super promiscuous and is known to cheat and leave, but I LOVE her. This love will conquer all! Going into these types of relationships makes absolutely no sense to me, but I've known so many people who do it, "in the name of love," that it scares the hell out of me. How can you not think about what is coming around the bend? Furthermore, many of these people, it just seems to come more naturally to, probably because they DO jump in all of the time. There's no teacher like experience.

quote:

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Usually if I feel a certain way about a thing I won't reveal it unless someone else notices how i'm feeling and coaxes it out of me or they somehow make me feel alright about expressing myself.

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That's the way I am too, but I only realized recently that it's become a liability in my relationships (of all kinds) because while I always feel like my emotions read to everyone around me, and that the problem should be obvious, to a lot of people it's not, and they need the feedback.

quote:

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Do you guys think Venus retro is a marker for being shy?

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Maybe shy isn't really the right word for it. I'm not shy in any other context. I will not however, go up and just start flirting with random guys (but if they start flirting with me, alright then- IF I even notice). Reserved or cautious with regards to relationships might be a better description. Also, a plain inability to recognize or signal romantic interest is often present. I know that I tend to have to be beaten over the head with it before I can even recognize it as that, which is why I end up missing out so much. I've had friends tell me that I was being flirted with and I had no clue.

So this reaction:

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I always felt they were mimicking phantom notions of what it was to be in a relationship rather than actually feeling the emotions as they came along.

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and this reaction:

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Like my friend seems to have no feel for it. she used to often ask "what are the rules" for this situation. she was always reading oprah to find out the rules for dating.

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posted April 08, 2012 12:27 PM            

She is not cruel in love and knows for sure what real love is. She has been dating the same guy for almost 9 years. She is confident in their relationship and obviously really loves him. They, as a couple, are a joy to be around, which can often not be said, especially after 9 years of dating which began in *high school*.

posted April 08, 2012 07:47 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by enchantress299:
and so when I see major incompatibilities, I tend to walk away before even trying to engage in a relationship.

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posted April 08, 2012 07:49 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by inthemisosoup:
One of my best friends has retrograde Venus in Scorpio. She is not shy at all, she is super outgoing and good at making everyone feel comfortable. She is not manipulative. She is not deceitful. She is probably the most righteously honest person I know. I can count on her for anything, but most of all, to genuine and kind (but not kind to the point of debilitating, infantilizing, or coddling someone. She will tell you straight up if something needs changing). She knows and understand better than many social graces and how to act appropriately in a given situation. She is charming and easily likeable. She has a ton of friends.

She is not cruel in love and knows for sure what real love is. She has been dating the same guy for almost 9 years. She is confident in their relationship and obviously really loves him. They, as a couple, are a joy to be around, which can often not be said, especially after 9 years of dating which began in *high school*.

Just goes to show, one placement doesn't determine much. I don't know her TOB, but her rXVenus is conjunct her Sun and Pluto; squares her moon and mars in Aquarius, trines Jupiter in Pisces.

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posted April 08, 2012 10:10 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by L0veLess:
She sounds really nice! And 9 years! sheesh! Are they gonna get married soon? Nice to hear some more positive things

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Haha! We joke about that all the time, but she has an Aquarius moon and Mars and is very independent and likes her space. She's never really expressed genuine interest in marriage or kids. Her boyfriend is also an Aqua sun so I think we may have to wait awhile for their wedding.

And she is super nice. I'm so blessed to have her in my life.

posted April 08, 2012 11:51 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by inthemisosoup:
Haha! We joke about that all the time, but she has an Aquarius moon and Mars and is very independent and likes her space. She's never really expressed genuine interest in marriage or kids. Her boyfriend is also an Aqua sun so I think we may have to wait awhile for their wedding.

And she is super nice. I'm so blessed to have her in my life.

I should add--I don't really feel this is necessarily her rX Venus talking, but she sure does like to debate and argue. About practically everything. And she will *always* be right and keep going until you give in. Very determined. I think this is probably more her four planets in Scorpio than anything else (Sun, Venus, Pluto, and Mercury). But sometimes the arguments can get really heated and awkward, not exactly becoming or Venusian of her.

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posted April 08, 2012 11:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SmilingHeart:
I have a very dear friend who has Venus retrograde. She is the sweetest person. Very intelligent and calm- even when it comes to relationships. You will never hear her admitting that she cried over a failed relationship.
She is very slow to open up in general. For the longest time (almost a year) I thought she didn't really like me. But it turns out that she considers me one of her best friends.
Venus in retro people have difficulties letting certain feelings in. They are probably afraid of being rejected and disappointed by their loved ones.
But I think they do care too much and have built that wall around them to protect themselves from a broken heart.

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posted April 09, 2012 04:46 PM              

His rx Uranus rules his 4th House/IC, which is the homeland, so its effects (revolutionary impulse) were manifested there. It's in opposition to Mercury by a wide orb. He misused his Uranian side in past incarnations and had lost personal control over redeeming it.

posted April 09, 2012 11:54 PM            

quote:

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He certainly used his Venusian gifts (Venus domiciled, with easy aspect to Moon and hard aspect from Mars but since Mars isn't comfortable in Taurus, Venus should dominate)..for selfish gains, so will probably be incarnated into an unaspected retrograde Venus the next time.

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^^^
See! THIS is what I'm talking about with regards to the whole 'you were incarnated into this life with a retrograde Venus because you're being PUNISHED' issue. As though you should be able to tell anyone what placements they will have when they incarnate, much less how much of a punishment it is. What if I was incarnated with a Venus retrograde in order to overcome it or use it as a secret gift? You don't know do you?

And... Only because this is the second reference to Hitler I've seen today on this site...

1. There were probably MANY people born on the same day as Hitler... And only one of them turned out to be Hitler- who, by the way, was only able to sway masses of people because THOSE PEOPLE FOLLOWED HIM. Aren't they at fault too? What if everyone pointed him out as the looney bin he was??? Then we wouldn't constantly have Hitler references (oh, if only).

2. I am sure that there are many many people in the world who have at least one astrological placement or two in common with Hitler. Perhaps several. Something tells me they aren't evil incarnate.

3. Godwin's law (also known as Godwin's Rule of Nazi Analogies or Godwin's Law of Nazi Analogies[1][2]) is a humorous observation made by Mike Godwin in 1990[2] that has become an Internet adage. It states: "As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1."[2][3] In other words, Godwin observed that, given enough time, in any online discussion—regardless of topic or scope—someone inevitably criticizes some point made in the discussion by comparing it to beliefs held by Hitler and the Nazis.

Godwin's law is often cited in online discussions as a deterrent against the use of arguments in the widespread Reductio ad Hitlerum form.[4] The rule does not make any statement about whether any particular reference or comparison to Adolf Hitler or the Nazis might be appropriate, but only asserts that the likelihood of such a reference or comparison arising increases as the discussion progresses. Precisely because such a comparison or reference may sometimes be appropriate, Godwin has argued that overuse of Nazi and Hitler comparisons should be avoided, because it robs the valid comparisons of their impact.[5]

-Thank you wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law

Can someone please be original and use the chart of Napolean or Genghis Khan or someone else?

posted April 10, 2012 12:13 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by enchantress299:
^^^
See! THIS is what I'm talking about with regards to the whole 'you were incarnated into this life with a retrograde Venus because you're being PUNISHED' issue. As though you should be able to tell anyone what placements they will have when they incarnate, much less how much of a punishment it is. What if I was incarnated with a Venus retrograde in order to overcome it or use it as a secret gift? You don't know do you?

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quote:

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And... Only because this is the second reference to Hitler I've seen today on this site...

1. There were probably MANY people born on the same day as Hitler... And only one of them turned out to be Hitler- who, by the way, was only able to sway masses of people because THOSE PEOPLE FOLLOWED HIM. Aren't they at fault too? What if everyone pointed him out as the looney bin he was??? Then we wouldn't constantly have Hitler references (oh, if only).

2. I am sure that there are many many people in the world who have at least one astrological placement or two in common with Hitler. Perhaps several. Something tells me they aren't evil incarnate.

3. Godwin's law (also known as Godwin's Rule of Nazi Analogies or Godwin's Law of Nazi Analogies[1][2]) is a humorous observation made by Mike Godwin in 1990[2] that has become an Internet adage. It states: "As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1."[2][3] In other words, Godwin observed that, given enough time, in any online discussion—regardless of topic or scope—someone inevitably criticizes some point made in the discussion by comparing it to beliefs held by Hitler and the Nazis.

Godwin's law is often cited in online discussions as a deterrent against the use of arguments in the widespread Reductio ad Hitlerum form.[4] The rule does not make any statement about whether any particular reference or comparison to Adolf Hitler or the Nazis might be appropriate, but only asserts that the likelihood of such a reference or comparison arising increases as the discussion progresses. Precisely because such a comparison or reference may sometimes be appropriate, Godwin has argued that overuse of Nazi and Hitler comparisons should be avoided, because it robs the valid comparisons of their impact.[5]

-Thank you wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law

Can someone please be original and use the chart of Napolean or Genghis Khan or someone else?

Thanks.

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posted April 10, 2012 01:59 AM            

I'm horrible in social situations, sometimes I'm amazed I have "friends", because I will disappear for months without contact and pop back up.

Sometimes people feel like they've done something "wrong" to me and it's me..I'm just distant..at times.

I also have a bad habit of pushing people away..

I just think I'm boring, bothersome, uninspiring..so I try to make myself very small, invisible basically and that can be read the wrong way i.e. stuck up, moody..

posted April 10, 2012 02:25 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Maka:
I have Venus Rx in the Leo in the 8th house

I'm horrible in social situations, sometimes I'm amazed I have "friends", because I will disappear for months without contact and pop back up.

Sometimes people feel like they've done something "wrong" to me and it's me..I'm just distant..at times.

I also have a bad habit of pushing people away..

I just think I'm boring, bothersome, uninspiring..so I try to make myself very small, invisible basically and that can be read the wrong way i.e. stuck up, moody..

Then I start to feel bad for that and I want to be noticed and I want to be social and well liked by others. I want to hang out..feel loved yet I don't at the same time due to mentioned fears.

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posted April 13, 2012 11:20 PM            

I don't think anyone could have explained it better than you did, with the having to "think" about it.

quote:

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Eh. I know I've said it before elsewhere on these boards, but I'll repeat it (because I'm too lazy to find the link).

Venus retro is like watching everyone else move forward while you are standing still. It's an outside in mentality. For me to be successful in relationships and often with social graces, I have to actually THINK about it. It seems counter intuitive because it is. Otherwise I seem to blunder along in relationships without a clue or I simply don't try to have any relationship. I do better by observing what works for others first and then by trying to have my own experiences (and usually failing). I've gotten better over time, but it is very slow going. I always seem to think that my emotions show to everyone around me, but they don't, and I've had to learn better verbal communication skills when it comes to relationships... Otherwise I simply won't communicate.

Ultimately, in me, it is marked as an incurable shyness when it comes to relationships (though I am very social and bold by nature). Think Raj from the Big Bang Theory. I'm not so bad I can't talk to guys... I just feel like I can't communicate romantic feelings a lot of times... And oh yes, alcohol helps.

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Venus in my chart is retrgrade in Aquarius in the 7th house and relationships definitely don't come naturally to me. Most people around me are getting in and out of relationsips while I aways get stuck on misunderstandings. I don't know how to flirt, how to signal interest, and am completely oblivious to "romantic interest" signals. I guess it comes from this assumption I have that people just don't care about me or that I'm not interesting, and sort of boring. Also it takes a rather longtime for me to get close to someone and let someone get close to me, and even then I sometimes retreat from interacting with them for some time. I guess because of it people see me as cold and unemotional when most of the time I just mean to be friendly and I do care.
I also can definitely relate to this whole acting cool but deep inside I am just being guarded.

I guess at least now I'm aware of how I come off to other people, I used to always wonder why relationship were so natural to others and why I was having a hard time compared to them. I truly did not understand what it was that I was doing, or getting wrong. Now that I do I'm trying to work on it.

posted April 14, 2012 03:53 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SmilingHeart:
Venus in retro people have difficulties letting certain feelings in. They are probably afraid of being rejected and disappointed by their loved ones.
But I think they do care too much and have built that wall around them to protect themselves from a broken heart.

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I wonder, would this potentially be a similar sort of interpretation for a venus retro in a Solar return chart? (I have Venus Rx conjunct Jupiter in the 5th, squaring Neptune in the second and trining Moon in the 8th this year.)

I have wondered how similar the interpretations would be for a natal versus an SR for Venus Rx. I quoted the above because that's exactly how I feel and it's the first time I have ever felt this in my life. I have never been afraid enough of having my heart broken to prevent me from opening myself up again (and again and again) - until now. Very interesting information. Thanks to all the Retro Venus people for posting!