posted August 28, 2012 09:03 AM            

I feel like I've gone way off topic on this thread though lol I'm sorry..

I still stick to my original statement, that if you guys can be open and honest with each other and be willing to work on the challenging aspects of your chart you'll be great. Love can overcome aspects

posted August 28, 2012 10:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
I'm not sure how we got onto the subject of Hitler.. but he was indeed a Taurus.

They have his exact data as per his birth certificate:
http://www.astro.com/astro-databank/Hitler,_Adolf

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At no point did I say Hitler was an Aries. I said he has my cousins birthday and she is an Aries. Weird how these cusps work huh?

posted September 07, 2012 11:53 AM            

A problem we have (and he would be horrified to know I was sharing this on a public message board) is a difference in sexual expectations. I desire it a lot more than he does. When we first started dating I wanted to do it 3+ times a day. He obliged for awhile but felt pressured & was very exhausted. (His job is physical and tiring on top of the sex I was demanding from him.) I agreed that once a day was perfectly reasonable. (I also knew that I was stressing him out if I was too demanding, which led him to being unable to perform.) For a few weeks we had sex once a day, occasionally skipping a day or two.

But in the past two weeks we've only had sex a few times. After we had sex this morning, I brought this pattern up to him (hell this is a new relationship and like I said I have a high sex drive); during the argument, he admitted he keeps me at arm's length after the repeated emotional/verbal blows I've thrown at him during our relationship. I know when we get in fights he can't have sex until he's healed emotionally; I happen to heal through sex.

posted September 07, 2012 12:05 PM            

I can be emotionally dramatic (Moon in Pisces) and I get pretty high and pretty low. But I get over any mood quickly, you can reason with me (e.g., make me laugh, point out that I'm behaving inappropriately) and I do not stew for days over something that angered me.

He on the other hand is more emotionally stable (Moon in Capricorn) but when he gets upset he stays upset. You cannot reason with him; he needs "time" to get over it. He will remain kind and logical and respectful toward me, but he wears that chip on his shoulder quite obviously. When I ask him if we can talk it out, it's pretty much "what happened, happened; and you can't change it."

posted September 07, 2012 12:06 PM            

quote:

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I guess it doesn't bother me that much because I'm a fire void myself so I'm not that active, and actually I think firey people tend to drain me because they always wanna move and do stuff and I'd rather stay home and chill.

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He has Leo Rising & Mars in Leo; he tends to want to be out and about.

I have Cancer Rising & Mars in Taurus; I tend to want to stay home.

posted September 07, 2012 12:10 PM            

quote:

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nurturing towards the crab(and gosh don't forget that leo, NEVER insult this one on a personal level if you want them to forgive you..)

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Well...too late.

quote:

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I found his devotion to be of the utmost until I hurt him and then it was *** for tat until he got me back for whatever I had done to wrong him.

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posted September 07, 2012 12:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by moonram:
He told me this morning that he has been holding me at arm's length. Our relationship started out with him being very affectionate and close; he is still kind and affectionate but he has clearly been distancing himself. When I am not sedated on marijuana, which I use regularly (but take occasional breaks from), I am far more hotheaded. I am petty and nitpick. I have started big arguments over very small things.

A problem we have (and he would be horrified to know I was sharing this on a public message board) is a difference in sexual expectations. I desire it a lot more than he does. When we first started dating I wanted to do it 3+ times a day. He obliged for awhile but felt pressured & was very exhausted. (His job is physical and tiring on top of the sex I was demanding from him.) I agreed that once a day was perfectly reasonable. (I also knew that I was stressing him out if I was too demanding, which led him to being unable to perform.) For a few weeks we had sex once a day, occasionally skipping a day or two.

But in the past two weeks we've only had sex a few times. After we had sex this morning, I brought this pattern up to him (hell this is a new relationship and like I said I have a high sex drive); during the argument, he admitted he keeps me at arm's length after the repeated emotional/verbal blows I've thrown at him during our relationship. I know when we get in fights he can't have sex until he's healed emotionally; I happen to heal through sex.

I think this is an Aries/Cancer problem.

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posted September 07, 2012 04:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
Why so much hate for Cancer guys?

I'm genuinely curious.

What have been your experiences?

I had a very bad experience with one, indeed, lots of lies and manipulation but they can be good guys also, right...? RIGHT?? lol.

But I don't think Aries is a very good match for them.. It can definitely work out with other good connections but they're basically too different, one is ruled by Mars and the other by the Moon. You get the idea.

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posted September 07, 2012 04:10 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
Why so much hate for Cancer guys?

I'm genuinely curious.

What have been your experiences?

I had a very bad experience with one, indeed, lots of lies and manipulation but they can be good guys also, right...? RIGHT?? lol.

But I don't think Aries is a very good match for them.. It can definitely work out with other good connections but they're basically too different, one is ruled by Mars and the other by the Moon. You get the idea.

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posted September 07, 2012 04:13 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by moonram:
Another issue we have is this strange paradox...

I can be emotionally dramatic (Moon in Pisces) and I get pretty high and pretty low. But I get over any mood quickly, you can reason with me (e.g., make me laugh, point out that I'm behaving inappropriately) and I do not stew for days over something that angered me.

He on the other hand is more emotionally stable (Moon in Capricorn) but when he gets upset he stays upset. You cannot reason with him; he needs "time" to get over it. He will remain kind and logical and respectful toward me, but he wears that chip on his shoulder quite obviously. When I ask him if we can talk it out, it's pretty much "what happened, happened; and you can't change it."

I'm like... "What did I say again?"

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posted September 07, 2012 05:18 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by LionFish:
My ex whom I dated for 5 years is the only Cancer guy I've ever known and for most of that time I felt nothing but drama and possessiveness from him. Some signs can handle it, but being Pisces sun I fed off of his emotions and reflected them and the Leo side of me hated being so damn moody. I found his devotion to be of the utmost until I hurt him and then it was *** for tat until he got me back for whatever I had done to wrong him. The level of deceit was even too much for me and the Sun/Neptune are the main players of my chart lol...

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i have had the same experience with other water sign people as well. i too am a water sun with strong fire emphasis. I'm a cancer. It's why i try to stay away from other water signs. They seem to hold grudges against me and can never let things go. I'm easygoing, i dont try to get back at people, i dont try to make people feel bad, i just ignore whoever it was that hurt me and try to smooth things over and forgive them. I've also had this issue with earth signs who i found also can't let things go. I'd rather be friends with a free spirit masculine sign who isnt always completely there for me the way i would want, than worry about a feminine sign completely turning against me for a tiny thing i did to them once.

posted September 07, 2012 10:25 PM            

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If anything its the other way around, from what I have seen they arent honest and open enough for Aries woman, and wayyyy to sensitive. I dont have a prob with the sensivity too much because I too am that way but I dont condone the manipulation and mind games they are capable of.

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What are your Cancer's other placements?

I tend to focus on the better aspects we have in synastry, like Moon conjunct Jupiter, Sun trine Moon, Mercury trine Mercury, his Moon conjunct my DSC, and my Venus conjunct his DSC.

posted September 07, 2012 10:28 PM            

quote:

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I'd rather be friends with a free spirit masculine sign who isnt always completely there for me the way i would want, than worry about a feminine sign completely turning against me for a tiny thing i did to them once.

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posted September 07, 2012 10:30 PM            

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As far as the aries temper goes...i think a cancer cant understand why someone would do and say things without thinking like that and takes it very personally. For us cancers, we are pretty calm most of the time so it is hard for us to show a temper and say things we dont mean. i never do that unless provoked incessantly, and for a long time. So when you guys do it, we take it very personally and find it hard to understand why you wouldve blown up so badly when there was really nothing that pushed u to the edge. We just dont understand your temper and think its really disrespectful and think you should have better control of yourself because...well, simply because people dont deserve that kind of treatment just because you feel you should be allowed to be yourself, or whatever excuse it is that you aries give. lol i dunno. aries who are like that baffle me. The aries i am friends with dont have tempers and are very cordial. But i definitely have encountered lots of aries with tempers. I personally cant stand anyone with a temper. it seems very selfish and inconsiderate to me.

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posted September 07, 2012 11:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by moonram:
[QUOTE]If anything its the other way around, from what I have seen they arent honest and open enough for Aries woman, and wayyyy to sensitive. I dont have a prob with the sensivity too much because I too am that way but I dont condone the manipulation and mind games they are capable of.

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[/QUOTE]

posted September 08, 2012 06:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by AriesKat:
Ive dated and only been pursued by one Cancer guy. It was so great in the beginning and then when things got too serious, the games began and that's when I lost respect for him. I dated him from like '06-'08 and let it go in the middle of 08, for him to be almost 10 yrs my senior he played a lot of games. I backed off and moved on but still somewhat stayed in contact as friends. But while we dated we both showed our ***** , he saw my really bad side an I saw his as well as good too but he does know me very well. To this day he still loves and want to be with me, but I just can't. I dont know if it's my Aries sun or Pisces moon that just detaches completely emotionally after a while. But I just can't bring myself to have those romantic feelings for him anymore. Once I've been deeply hurt or betrayed I can't ever look at the person the same way. But from my experience I think if a cancer really loves you they will be there through thick and thin, so as Iong as your not crazy I think your good. Yes Aries have tempers and that can be both a
Postive and negative thing, you shouldn't have to go to therapy for something that comes naturally to you. I have learned to somewhat cOntrol my temper but sometimes I get mad just like everyOne else an I refuse to hold that anger in it must be released, just like I accept peoples shortcomings they should accept mine too including my temper, which is really dependent on how you treat me. Treat me nice and you never know that I have a temper eff with me and you will get what you deserve. My cancer knows the good bad and ugly about me and tells me constantly he loves all of me.

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Well, to be fair, it isn't bad to simply be angry. It's how you express it that is important.

I don't feel that people should just accept a temper that is expressed in unhealthy ways (like domestic violence/any and all forms of abuse, including verbal and emotional abuse as well as physical). The first time a partner hits you should be the very last. If someone turns to abusing alcohol (as in, they drink a lot when mad), then no, someone shouldn't put up with that nightmare, either. People shouldn't have to live in fear of a partner. Throwing or breaking things, especially if those things are expensive, much-needed, or have sentimental value, is also not a healthy form of anger expression. If someone's temper is to the point that someone is afraid of them, have to walk on eggshells, has to stifle themselves, and becomes a shell of who they were, then no, people shouldn't just accept that as a fault. They should run away as far and as fast as they can and never look back.

On the other hand, if someone learns to express anger in a civilized way (i.e., not screaming, not verbal abuse, and not violence, but in talking things out with the person and reaching a solution, and being able to apologize/make amends when wrong), or if someone releases anger in a healthy way (like an exercise class, to give one example), then that person is mature enough and might be worth the effort/investment.

posted September 08, 2012 06:11 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by moonram:

Thank you.

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aw, no, thank you, hun. for taking no offense to that. I tried to give what is probably going on in his head as best I could. If an aries is willing to change their temper for you...it shows they really love you. You must care about him a lot.

posted September 08, 2012 08:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by RegardesPlatero:
Well, to be fair, it isn't bad to simply be angry. It's how you express it that is important.

I don't feel that people should just accept a temper that is expressed in unhealthy ways (like domestic violence/any and all forms of abuse, including verbal and emotional abuse as well as physical). The first time a partner hits you should be the very last. If someone turns to abusing alcohol (as in, they drink a lot when mad), then no, someone shouldn't put up with that nightmare, either. People shouldn't have to live in fear of a partner. Throwing or breaking things, especially if those things are expensive, much-needed, or have sentimental value, is also not a healthy form of anger expression. If someone's temper is to the point that someone is afraid of them, have to walk on eggshells, has to stifle themselves, and becomes a shell of who they were, then no, people shouldn't just accept that as a fault. They should run away as far and as fast as they can and never look back.

On the other hand, if someone learns to express anger in a civilized way (i.e., not screaming, not verbal abuse, and not violence, but in talking things out with the person and reaching a solution, and being able to apologize/make amends when wrong), or if someone releases anger in a healthy way (like an exercise class, to give one example), then that person is mature enough and might be worth the effort/investment.

Again, my point isn't that people should never get angry or express it, just that expressing it in healthy ways is important. Love shouldn't be unconditional to the point that people are willing to put up with abuse and mistreatment. That's not "love". That's martyrdom and masochism. It is important to treat people right, and if people don't send the message that they require being treated right, it's not going to help either person.

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posted September 08, 2012 08:53 PM            

When a Cancer chooses you like that though, they will never leave. They just won't. I don't really get that because as a fire sign personal happiness is very important and we understand the fluidity of life and the coming and going of people. We are independent. A Cancer...you could say the meanest things to a Cancer and sure, they'll leave you alone for a month maybe. But then they have no shame (I say that nicely) and come knocking back on your door wanting to patch things up. They are very loyal, very clingy signs.

My friendship has lasted over the years with us having seen each other physically probably 10 times. The rest has been over conversation due to living in different states. I think Cancers need Aries' confidence and directness and Aries' needs that emotional womb Cancers are so good at creating. It's hard for us rams being a hard ass all the time and Cancer is there when we need a break.