posted November 07, 2014 03:50 PM              

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
Hopefully I'll get to see that side unveil itself a bit more hahaha!

That would be cool if you can also manage to get their birthdates. Just to build up some data on this... I am queen of derailing and going off on tangents. I love conversation so much that I welcome it in all shapes and forms. Thanks for the grounding, Virgo

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I do have something else, for me personally. It's also not in keeping with the topic exactly, but cheaters has come up somewhere along the lines. It's unusual behavior on my part.

The daughter of the couple I just referred to. That relationship with her was just the most insane crap ever! Major controlling going on and psychological abuse. (her abusing me) Then it got physical and I know I was a much bigger and stronger person but still. The only thing on my brain was to have her gone. For 6 months I fought very much to try to rid myself of her. (She lived with me) It was very difficult actually.

So, at no point ever did I even dream up the thought of cheating on her, nor did I. She had a previous history of cheating and I did consider trying to get one of our male friends to see if they could get her to do it. All to get rid of her. The kind of person that she was, had she cheated she would have been up front and either ended the relationship there or at least left the door open for me to do it.

That also got me thinking. I've been cheated on quite a bit in my life. Now I wonder, did I secretly sabotage my own relationships? I think perhaps. I know a couple of times I just may have done that very thing.

posted November 07, 2014 04:05 PM            

quote:

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Even here on LL poly gets talked about quite easily. I don't see too many people acting shocked. People were more shocked on a thread about a specific sex act, IIRC. Unless I missed it.

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People that are willing to discuss Astrology with any level of seriousness are more open minded, IMO.

But we're getting off topic... LOL!

posted November 07, 2014 04:08 PM            

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Originally posted by LucieLemonade:
Aw! How come I always miss the picture threads?! Boo!!

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We'll have to start a new one then, won't we?

posted November 07, 2014 04:18 PM              

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
I do have something else, for me personally. It's also not in keeping with the topic exactly, but cheaters has come up somewhere along the lines. It's unusual behavior on my part.

The daughter of the couple I just referred to. That relationship with her was just the most insane crap ever! Major controlling going on and psychological abuse. (her abusing me) Then it got physical and I know I was a much bigger and stronger person but still. The only thing on my brain was to have her gone. For 6 months I fought very much to try to rid myself of her. (She lived with me) It was very difficult actually.

So, at no point ever did I even dream up the thought of cheating on her, nor did I. She had a previous history of cheating and I did consider trying to get one of our male friends to see if they could get her to do it. All to get rid of her. The kind of person that she was, had she cheated she would have been up front and either ended the relationship there or at least left the door open for me to do it.

That also got me thinking. I've been cheated on quite a bit in my life. Now I wonder, did I secretly sabotage my own relationships? I think perhaps. I know a couple of times I just may have done that very thing.

It's interesting to me to think about that.

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Can you elaborate more on that last paragraph? Reflect on it a bit and get back to me... I'm interested to know how you think you secretly sabotaged your relationships. Also, what is "that very thing" referring to? I think you attracting people that have cheated on you is telling of an energy within yourself that you hadn't resolved then. I always attract people that have commitment issues or are unsuitable, in one way or another and I think that has so much to do with the fact that I am not discriminative when it comes to my love interests. I accept people without analyzing whether or not they are people that I *need*. Could it be, like you mentioned earlier, that you always felt that one person is too much to handle anyway, that you attracted people who weren't 100% committal?

posted November 07, 2014 04:18 PM            

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
That's EXTREMELY telling. All those aspects to Uranus in the 5th. Amazing! I wish I knew my friend's wife's information so I could check their composite.

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I know right?! I had no idea and never considered even checking before!

posted November 07, 2014 04:20 PM              

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Originally posted by Geeky:
We'll have to start a new one then, won't we?

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posted November 07, 2014 04:26 PM              

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
Might be quite a while before I get back to you but I will.

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posted November 07, 2014 04:30 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
I know! I'm so down for that! But I get the vibe many people on LL don't like posting their pictures...

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We just have to come up with a new theme other than the "guess my Asc" stuff...

posted November 07, 2014 04:43 PM            

This was posted online:
He has 3 Wives

Akon, 25, told Martinez, "I'm a polygamist. I can afford to have as many wives as I can afford to have. All Africans believe in it. My dad has four wives."

The rapper insisted that under the teachings of the Koran, all wives must be treated equally - which Akon insists he does. But the Atlanta, Georgia-based star's confession has forced his label Universal to issue him with a gagging order.

He tells AllHipHop.com, "Me and Angie were having a conversation. In the beginning it was cool because I said, 'Okay I got enough fans out there, I got a lot of supporters I can get open with them.' But then after me and Angie had that conversation, situations started getting heated. It started affecting other people that had nothing to do with us. Because of that, (the label) said they don't want me to promote that aspect, and I can't talk about that too much because it's destroying other people's families and other things. I said, 'OK, no problem.'

posted November 07, 2014 06:20 PM            

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Originally posted by LucieLemonade:
I'm not exactly sure it's "rare". It's probably just hasn't been openly discussed or defined. A man* with a wife and a mistress is nothing new. They just didn't call it "polyamory".

*mostly men. I'm sure women too. But you know what i mean.

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I thought about mentioning that but I didn't because polyamory is about acknowledging it to each other. But in monogamy it's called cheating because you're not sticking to the rules of the game...maybe it's not feasible for everyone but when a couple agree to monogamy it changes how "other romantic/sexual relationships" is done and the consequences because of the rules and paradigm. 'Course some get away with the cheating through either luck or circumstances, but they're still cheating at the game plan, and the game is called "monogamy." Having a mistress on the side isn't polyamory, it's cheating at an agreement concerning monogamy, just like there's a difference between those who get a commission from a sale and those who steal a bit of the money gained from the sale on the side, one is a commission, the other is theft. While I suppose both could be seen as business, I do see a difference between them.

Though it surprised me just how common women do it, too, and not just illicit affairs, but cruising for sex just like guys, and some can be as selfish about it as any guy. And I knew an 18-year-old boy (still in high school) being shared by a clique of housewives, just pure sex (hope for his sake the husbands never found out), though what was odd is that he was so small and androgynous (didn't think most women went for that, but then I learned androgynous lesbians, particularly the so-called lesbian "bois," are a very hot item among many housewives for quick illicit sex, too).

posted November 08, 2014 01:05 AM            

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Originally posted by GoingDutch:
You serious about the packed 5th house?
My guy have Sun, Mercury, Venus, and Mars all that in the 5th house. smh

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posted November 08, 2014 01:26 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PisceanDream:
So about a year ago, I found myself tangled in the web of this bisexual polyamorous guy who had a girlfriend and was also getting married 2 weeks after he had started hitting on me and making sexual advances towards me

He is altogether quite an interesting character and very easy on the eyes, LOL! As much as I was attracted to him, I rejected his advances for many reasons that had nothing to do with his personality, preferences, or appearance.

Anyway, I was wondering what in the chart would indicate polyamory and not just an open relationship where people bone other people and call it a day, but actually having long-term serious relationships with multiple lovers.

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I do not want in any way to endorse or otherwise encourage the use of astrological stereotypes that would cause astrology buffs to 'suspect' polyamory in someone by looking at their chart. However, simply apply established astrological principles to this matter.

What is polyamory? Poly = plurality, many.

The desire to love many persons and belief that one can manage this in a romantic/erotic expression.

This points us to Venus only nominally, but to Jupiter by breadth of inclusion/expansion, and to Uranus by its detachment, non-conforming principle. It suggests possible combinations of these factors by planet emphasis and/or signs. Uranus/Aquarius, potentized Jupiter/Sagittarius, lastly potentized/detached Venus/Libra.

There is also the suggestion of a strong ego involved here, which is contained within Jupiter's expansion principle.

posted November 08, 2014 01:33 AM              

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Originally posted by Aubyanne:
Three cheers for nonmonogamy!

I'll happily supply the charts of myself, my husband, and my partner.

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posted November 08, 2014 01:33 AM            

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Originally posted by ungumuda:
Anna Paquin and her hubby from True Blood have open marriage and they're public about it. It would be interesting to learn their chart.

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posted November 08, 2014 01:42 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by GoingDutch:
And I was wondering, in a polyamory family, would it effect the children?

My Libra was in 11 grade, his teens years when his step dad come into the picture. Even till now, he can't seem to accept the step dad.
I heard that the older the child is, the harder it is to accept a step parent? This guy wants nothing to do with emotional issues that are difficult for him, so he just avoid facing it.

I know step parents are just part of polyamory, but if children growing up in a polyamory family, how should they be raise, how do they reacts when go to school with other children? Anyone have experience in this? care to share on how you teach your child?

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After my ex-husband left me, that's when I really evaluated my way of dealing with relationships. He cheated on me and that shook my confidence. I realized I first had to find love within myself and that I didn't NEED someone else to give me love. (edit: there is love in poly relationships, but it's uncaged.... not possessive)

Anyway, I never would have imagined I'd end up poly, but once I went there, it felt normal for me. Like this is what I should have been doing all along.

My kids didn't know because they were pretty young at the time. I had lots of acquaintances & friends that would just drop by (ones I wasn't sleeping with lol) so they got used to seeing lots of people around... in other words, they wouldn't have noticed a change.

(more later... phone)

posted November 08, 2014 01:42 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by Kannon McAfee:
I do not want in any way to endorse or otherwise encourage the use of astrological stereotypes that would cause astrology buffs to 'suspect' polyamory in someone by looking at their chart. However, simply apply established astrological principles to this matter.

What is polyamory? Poly = plurality, many.

The desire to love many persons and belief that one can manage this in a romantic/erotic expression.

This points us to Venus only nominally, but to Jupiter by breadth of inclusion/expansion, and to Uranus by its detachment, non-conforming principle. It suggests possible combinations of these factors by planet emphasis and/or signs. Uranus/Aquarius, potentized Jupiter/Sagittarius, lastly potentized/detached Venus/Libra.

There is also the suggestion of a strong ego involved here, which is contained within Jupiter's expansion principle.

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You're totally right. I am not, in anyway, trying to suggest that if a certain set of indicators exist in a chart that it would mean the person is polyamorous. I always argue and caution against this, but my interest was more to know about someone who *is* already polyamorous and what in his/her chart would indicate it.

In the chart of the guy I was talking about, he has Venus in Libra square Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Chiron! To me, that gave it away.

posted November 08, 2014 01:50 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by GoingDutch:
And I was wondering, in a polyamory family, would it effect the children?

My Libra was in 11 grade, his teens years when his step dad come into the picture. Even till now, he can't seem to accept the step dad.
I heard that the older the child is, the harder it is to accept a step parent? This guy wants nothing to do with emotional issues that are difficult for him, so he just avoid facing it.

I know step parents are just part of polyamory, but if children growing up in a polyamory family, how should they be raise, how do they reacts when go to school with other children? Anyone have experience in this? care to share on how you teach your child?

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This may be a language issue, but in the American (and western culture in general) family system, the presence of stepparents due to remarriage is known as a blended family.

Polyamory, as it's more traditionally defined, is the presence of more than one romantic / committed partner in a family system.

For example, I'm married to my husband, but my partner and I have been together off-and-on for the last four years. Since we began a committed relationship this past year, however, we've remained together.

My stepdaughter does not know; my husband and I are presently of the opinion that she doesn't need to. She's nearly thirteen, however, so we'll likely discuss it with her in the next few years at some point.

posted November 08, 2014 04:40 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Geeky:
We just have to come up with a new theme other than the "guess my Asc" stuff...

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posted November 08, 2014 05:28 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by GoingDutch:
Yeah, and my Libra have a Uranus in 7th House, as well as a Saturn in his 7 House too. And His Moon/Mars opposition is at negative -2.5 degrees.
And a packed 5 House.

I can't find any clue to him being a cheater in person, so I am using astrology to criticize him.

I guess my Gemini Moon always at work, I'm obsessed with find faults in his natal chart.

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My libra man has that too, and also a packed 5th house. If you dont know him and look at his chart you would think he was a cheater or at least into polyamory... but really, he is not into that stuff, or at least he doesnt know it yet.