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Topic: How "un-dateable" are you? :) (for fun)
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Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted August 31, 2018 12:33 PM
quote: Originally posted by StoneMoon: oh wow, reading the expression of your words, of being encouraged to not date interracially to avoid inciting controversy just sparked a huge nerve in me! That is definitely NOT you inviting or inciting controversy. To love another person regardless of who they are is the most beautiful thing a person could do. That rhetoric is the hatred and bigotry and ignorance of low minded idiots who use fear and shame and bullying to manipulate others. My daughter is bisexual. But she is very young and very few people know this. I choose not to broadcast it, mostly because it is not mine to broadcast. But I realized I chose not to tell other family members because the purpose of doing so would be to "cushion" the information to them. And I realized it made me very angry that I would need to "protect" and "soften" the perceived blow her sexuality would be to them and their egos and their outdated, unevolved perspectives. I think she is beautiful in her ability to love and find attractive both sexes. I admire her for the way she thinks and perceives life. sorry for the soapbox tirade there. I will try to keep to the subject. I guess in a way we are all called upon to find the strength to handle whatever challenges are in our life path. And I totally agree with you- I know my personal struggle and now at 40 have realized why I choose the relationships I do, and it is most definitely out of a sense of fear and fragility of my own self worth. Aries- is it your rising or Sun that is Aries 23? I don't know your placements but I am LOVING this discussion. My Mercury is 24 Leo. You're hitting it beautifully for me!
Its awesome that you are catching my drift. There are times where I feel like a dog waiting on the beautiful sands of a beach to play "catch". But alas, nobody around likes dogs. On the first point. Its amazing the extent to which bisexual/gay people will go to make straight people feel at " ease" with their sexuality. I call it "straight privilege" as they always try to "explain" who they are etc. As if anyone can explain successfully why their nose twitches? I think that is why many LGBTI people ate just tired. Tired of explaining endlessly. Tired of having to "wait" for the world to be comfortable and accepting etc. So they break out in rage. This so called "gay agenda" that straight people are quick to label the recognition of gay people as being, is to me a threat that is likened to a child who has to accept the presence of a sibling. The world's attention is on the sibling. So the "elder" child who was used to all the toys being given to them must come to the realization that they are not the only one around anymore. So that resistance is often violent, patronizing to the sibling and can resort to downright bullying tactics. All because attention has shifted and exclusivity to all things is now not possible. And secondly. I would like to applaud you for being such a positive influence on her. It is quite a journey that one must walk when it is in a world that wants to decapitate your legs in some way. And lastly, it is my Asc that is in Aries. But its on the 20 Degree mark. I initially named myself Aries23Degrees when my chart was rectified. But further analysis moved the degree further back to 20. And I didn't change it. Too much admin
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Randall Webmaster Posts: 107383 From: From a galaxy, far, far away... Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 02, 2018 07:27 PM
Undateability close to 100%. Keyword: Aloof. IP: Logged |
Morrigan Knowflake Posts: 82 From: Registered: Sep 2018
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posted September 08, 2018 08:14 PM
Cool thread! I am simply too much. First house Scorpio stellium. Including Pluto. Yikes. Actually, the Plutonian and Neptunian elements of my chart melt into each other. So, a double dose of 'bad' watery characteristics, lol. First, you're hit with all the intensity, then comes the slipperiness. Frustrating.IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 107383 From: From a galaxy, far, far away... Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 08, 2018 08:16 PM
Welcome!IP: Logged |
WarriorPrincess7 Knowflake Posts: 758 From: Island of Sirens Registered: Jul 2013
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posted September 08, 2018 08:29 PM
Neptune T-square and my most aspected planet Venus conjunct saturn in pisces in the 8th Pluto in the 4thI have a hard time with EMOTIONAL intimacy and i keep having heartbreak after heartbreak...its emotionally draining and kills me IP: Logged |
Morrigan Knowflake Posts: 82 From: Registered: Sep 2018
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posted September 08, 2018 09:11 PM
quote: Originally posted by Randall: Welcome!
Thank you, Randall. IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 02:45 AM
quote: Originally posted by Randall: Undateability close to 100%. Keyword: Aloof.
Lol. Aloofness is off-putting. Unless you are really not interested. Cap/Aqua Venus/Moon or Sun I guess or Saturn in aspect to the aforementioned planets maybe? IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 02:53 AM
quote: Originally posted by Morrigan: Cool thread! I am simply too much. First house Scorpio stellium. Including Pluto. Yikes. Actually, the Plutonian and Neptunian elements of my chart melt into each other. So, a double dose of 'bad' watery characteristics, lol. First, you're hit with all the intensity, then comes the slipperiness. Frustrating.
Both increase the propensity of making one mysterious and seemingly inaccessible because of a closed grip approach to meeting others. Neptune gives the "impression" of being open. But it isn't. Whilst Pluto is suspicious and self protective. I can certainly concur with the Neptune slipperiness lol. It (NEP) conjuncts my Sun and am not really clear as to how it affects my relationships on the whole. Hmmmm...
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Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 03:01 AM
quote: Originally posted by WarriorPrincess7: Neptune T-square and my most aspected planet Venus conjunct saturn in pisces in the 8th Pluto in the 4thI have a hard time with EMOTIONAL intimacy and i keep having heartbreak after heartbreak...its emotionally draining and kills me
Interesting. I have the Venus-Sat conjunct too and this aspect is about not being able to trust ime. Especially since mine is in Scorpio. Is the heartbreak due to you not being intimate and your partner struggling to have you open up. Thus breaking up with you? Or is the heartache from receiving the cold feedback that you unwittingly give off and ironically fear getting back? Thus causing you to close up that much more? I actually thing Saturn on Moon or Venus/Cap Moon or Venus are actually "cold" becausd it is the knee jerk response to external stimulus i.e other people are cold so I will be cold. Its funny because most people read them as "cold" and then respond in like. Which precipitates them closing up more. Lol I have had to be conscious of this in personal relationships so as to know when I am giving off that vibe. IP: Logged |
Desiring Shadows Knowflake Posts: 4429 From: USA ! Registered: Jan 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 08:22 AM
One thing great about my Libra Mars is that I’m sometimes considered a tease.. which means I have the capability to entice people! 😁 So there’s some points for Libra Mars ------------------ Sun Virgo/Moon Scorpio/Ascendant Taurus 😉😎💕 IP: Logged |
erickaf Knowflake Posts: 2015 From: Europe Registered: Oct 2014
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posted September 09, 2018 08:33 AM
Fun thread. Moon inconjunct Mars I can be an angry, touchy frustrated partner.lolIP: Logged |
WarriorPrincess7 Knowflake Posts: 758 From: Island of Sirens Registered: Jul 2013
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posted September 09, 2018 11:04 AM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Interesting. I have the Venus-Sat conjunct too and this aspect is about not being able to trust ime. Especially since mine is in Scorpio.Is the heartbreak due to you not being intimate and your partner struggling to have you open up. Thus breaking up with you? Or is the heartache from receiving the cold feedback that you unwittingly give off and ironically fear getting back? Thus causing you to close up that much more? I actually thing Saturn on Moon or Venus/Cap Moon or Venus are actually "cold" becausd it is the knee jerk response to external stimulus i.e other people are cold so I will be cold. Its funny because most people read them as "cold" and then respond in like. Which precipitates them closing up more. Lol I have had to be conscious of this in personal relationships so as to know when I am giving off that vibe.
It's exactly how you described of being received with cold vibes/ rejections because I unconsciously put off that vibe myself as a defense mechanism to not be hurt by others. In the end I just end up all alone
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Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 12:40 PM
quote: Originally posted by Desiring Shadows: One thing great about my Libra Mars is that I’m sometimes considered a tease.. which means I have the capability to entice people! 😁 So there’s some points for Libra Mars
Yes. Lol. So true I have always thought this. I have Mars in Libra & my ex said I teased him a lot. Got him all hot and bothered but would disappear afterwards when he wanted to follow through. Luckily he has Mars/Venus in Gemini and Loved it!!
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Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 12:43 PM
quote: Originally posted by erickaf: Fun thread. Moon inconjunct Mars I can be an angry, touchy frustrated partner.lol
I concur. Mine is a square between Moon/Mars. And it certainly makes me touchy. Do you have Mars in aspect to Sun/Asc or Ic perhaps? Or is the inconjunct the only aspect? IP: Logged |
Morrigan Knowflake Posts: 82 From: Registered: Sep 2018
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posted September 09, 2018 01:45 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Both increase the propensity of making one mysterious and seemingly inaccessible because of a closed grip approach to meeting others.Neptune gives the "impression" of being open. But it isn't. Whilst Pluto is suspicious and self protective.
Yeah, it's a mixed bag, isn't it? They think they know, but...they're always surprised when another layer reveals itself. And I think I'm being upfront, but I'm told I'm evasive. It just feels hopeless in that, I can never seem to find somebody who is okay with and can reciprocate my level of intensity. Sure, I can pretend to be easy going. But for how long? quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: I can certainly concur with the Neptune slipperiness lol. It (NEP) conjuncts my Sun and am not really clear as to how it affects my relationships on the whole. Hmmmm...
Really? I've a sun-neptune conjunction in Cappy. Not sure how it affects my relationships either, but I don't seem to be as driven as most Cap suns I meet. Could it have something to do with that? IP: Logged |
Morrigan Knowflake Posts: 82 From: Registered: Sep 2018
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posted September 09, 2018 01:50 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Interesting. I have the Venus-Sat conjunct too and this aspect is about not being able to trust ime. Especially since mine is in Scorpio.Is the heartbreak due to you not being intimate and your partner struggling to have you open up. Thus breaking up with you? Or is the heartache from receiving the cold feedback that you unwittingly give off and ironically fear getting back? Thus causing you to close up that much more? I actually thing Saturn on Moon or Venus/Cap Moon or Venus are actually "cold" becausd it is the knee jerk response to external stimulus i.e other people are cold so I will be cold. Its funny because most people read them as "cold" and then respond in like. Which precipitates them closing up more. Lol I have had to be conscious of this in personal relationships so as to know when I am giving off that vibe.
That's interesting. I've always wondered about you Venus-Saturn folks. How do you show you care? Like, how does one know when you're simply not interested v.s. being guarded? IME, even when you guys are "in love", the expression is toned down quite a bit. Or is it that it takes time? They are very dependable, though. Seems like they're holding back, at the best of times (no offense, my "scale" might be off). My question is, will they always be this way or do they loosen up as they get older, like other Saturn-aspects? IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 02:57 PM
quote: Originally posted by Morrigan: Really? I've a sun-neptune conjunction in Cappy. Not sure how it affects my relationships either, but I don't seem to be as driven as most Cap suns I meet. Could it have something to do with that?
Absolutely. I read Linda Goodman's Sun signs years back and didn't bother with Pisces Sun Because at the time I was reading strictly from a Sun sign Sag energy POV. But upon rereading the book previously, something resonated strongly with me with regards to Pisces. There is a part in the book where she states that to the Pisces, its this "reality" that we wake into that is fantasy. And to them(Pisces), the dreamworld is what is real. I took a moment...put the book down and thought "This is it!" The reason that I am not so "ambitious" and all about moneymaking is at the core of this. I have always believed that dreams should be enough to carry someone to self actualization. And that dreams are what makes life worth living. So I tried many times(and eventually am succeeding) to interbreed my dreams and longings(Neptune) into plans concerning my career and life purpose(Sun). And this is because as Linda wrote, I think my soul core is more concerned with the "reality" of what my dreams are saying I should live. Than what life is saying I should live etc. Also what you stated about Neptune having you think that you are transparent whilst others perceive you evasive. I am like this too. I will make a post on Facebook about something that I believe is quite clear. And then I will get responses like "mind f***for days" or "what are you saying exactly?" Etc. Sigh.... IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 09, 2018 03:17 PM
quote: Originally posted by Morrigan: That's interesting. I've always wondered about you Venus-Saturn folks. How do you show you care? Like, how does one know when you're simply not interested v.s. being guarded? IME, even when you guys are "in love", the expression is toned down quite a bit. Or is it that it takes time? They are very dependable, though. Seems like they're holding back, at the best of times (no offense, my "scale" might be off). My question is, will they always be this way or do they loosen up as they get older, like other Saturn-aspects?
These questions are so good. And I will do my best to answer them. How to know we are interested v.s being guarded? Its hard to tell. The best way to tell is to lookout for the same signs that one would look for in anyone who likes them. Do they get "softer" with me vs others? Yes. Even Saturn-Venus softens up. Do they follow up on things i.e call me when I get home? Do they insist on getting you alone for some bonding? Do they try to take care of you or nurture you in some ways? Yes. This happens too. I however also have Mars/Moon square that makes me brave emotionally. Its only in the sexual intimacy zone that I " freeze" up. The sure fire way to "thaw" Venus-Saturn in sex I think, is through lots of sensuality and assurance that it all doesn't have to happen now(sex) With Venus/Saturn folks, one must approach them with the intent to unfold them over a matter of time. Do they loosen up as they get older? Yes. And the Venus nature comes out more because they feel secure. Imagine a bouncer at a club (Saturn). He has to keep up the tough act because of his job. And it could easily be mistaken to be what he is. Now if you frequent the club where the bouncer works, make casual(unobtrusive) talk with him now and then etc. You will notice that on an unexpected day, that bouncer will start to greet you. Maybe as you are going about your business at the mall and not notice them,they brush along beside you and wink. And to all others who are with you, they will ask "you know that guy who looks like the incredible hulk?" The more time passes, the more you interact, the less walls there are. And soon you find yourself getting to know the more softer or social side of that bouncer(Venus). Now if you never talked to the bouncer and never frequented the place they work. Took the image they portray there as "who they are" and treated them with the cold indifference (on the surface)as they do you. Then you will never get to the Venus, juicy centre. I think that is how Saturn-Venus works: Don't be presumptuous, brusque or impatient. Take your time. They open up eventually. Its inevitable. IP: Logged |
Morrigan Knowflake Posts: 82 From: Registered: Sep 2018
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posted September 09, 2018 07:10 PM
Thanks for your response about Sun-Neptune, that puts it in perspective. Also, I totally relate to this - quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: I will make a post on Facebook about something that I believe is quite clear. And then I will get responses like "mind f***for days" or "what are you saying exactly?" Etc. Sigh....
Re: The Venus-Saturn post. What a wonderful analogy, the bouncer at the club. You have to make good with Saturn before you get to the Venus. Lots of great points there, I'll keep those in mind next time I come across somebody with this aspect. IP: Logged |
Claudine Knowflake Posts: 145 From: Registered: Mar 2016
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posted September 11, 2018 07:28 AM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Yes. The 1st house cusp rules 1st impressions. And the planets there modify it.A Venus conjunct the Asc for instance(even when martial Aries rising) gets away with a lot more assertion than would otherwise be the case if Mars was conjunct the Asc. So people experience how attractive the individual is from the get go(default) You ever met someone who seemed so "rough and tumble" (say Scorpio rising)but oh so attractive and magnetic? Even as you are drawn to their more butch appearance, you can't help but feel affection for them? That individual could have Moon/Venus or Jupiter in aspect to the Asc. The Asc is modified by planets in aspect to it. But it need not be a disadvantage I tell ya. As much as we can't help the Asc, we can let people know with a comical "Look, usually I don't make the great first impression" when on a date. And get them to relax into us more Especially when we seem to get feedback from people that is consistent i.e that we seem threatening, antagonistic or brusque even if we are not meaning to be (Sun) But the magical part of the Asc is because it is such a "doorway" to our instinctive, unfiltered expression, in synastry it is MAGIC. The Moon Virgo/ Venus in Virgo or Mars in Virgo person will be drawn to you if you have say Virgo Asc. As they will see your "real" expression of yourself as refreshing and honest(especially the Moon person) With Venus/Mars, the attraction could be more physical. With the Venus individual being the one to project all sorts of fantasies about you that they interact with as they interact with you. The Asc is unapologetic and wants total acceptance from the individual. Because unlike the Sun, it is not based in what we are trying to be from an ego level(Sun). Nor is it like the Moon which serves to defend its subjective experiences and navigate from an internal compass through life through societal conditioning. The Asc is this moment NOW. It asks not for one to be "prepared"/or dwell in imaginings of the ego(Sun) nor what was(Moon). It calls for the new moment now, now,now. Always expression, always raw and always real. Its so embarrassingly real that when people interact with it,it leaves impressions. That 1st(house) impression
Hello Aries23Degrees, Sorry, it took me some time to reply. Your reply is very valuable. My chart is watery-earthy for the great part, and when I act by my ASC, I feel like I am really acting, so that's why I was talking about ASC as some sort of a mask. It's strange, in my thoughts I can be sad and somewhere in dark places, I am kinda melancholic, but sometimes when I meet with my friend, for example, or I am with my family, I act like someone else. That's Leo asc. So yeah, it looks like an unconditional behaviour, but still feels weird. ------------------ * English isn't my native language. IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 11, 2018 09:50 AM
Did you mention that your Sun is in the 12th? Because I could not help but get a Neptune flashback when I read your post now i.e of acting like someone else depending on the company.Neptune on the Asc or Pisces rising and even ruler of the 1st house in 12th can be the most difficult to decipher. In that the pure unfiltered Asc self is often momentarily there before being "bulldozed" by other energies that Neptune energized 12th house naturally simulate. I think that that may be why you still feel like you are wearing a "mask" because with that position, one barely has enough breath to catch before "absorbing" so many personalities and differing energies from which one "hides" beneath. More than any other person(even Aries and Cap) , this individual needs peaceful alone time (at a temple or some other peaceful retreat)/to meditate and respond intuitively to the inner voice naturally before the environment "dominates" them. How close is your Sun from the Asc? Did you mention that you are Leo Asc? IP: Logged |
Claudine Knowflake Posts: 145 From: Registered: Mar 2016
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posted September 11, 2018 05:32 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Did you mention that your Sun is in the 12th? Because I could not help but get a Neptune flashback when I read your post now i.e of acting like someone else depending on the company.Neptune on the Asc or Pisces rising and even ruler of the 1st house in 12th can be the most difficult to decipher. In that the pure unfiltered Asc self is often momentarily there before being "bulldozed" by other energies that Neptune energized 12th house naturally simulate. I think that that may be why you still feel like you are wearing a "mask" because with that position, one barely has enough breath to catch before "absorbing" so many personalities and differing energies from which one "hides" beneath. More than any other person(even Aries and Cap) , this individual needs peaceful alone time (at a temple or some other peaceful retreat)/to meditate and respond intuitively to the inner voice naturally before the environment "dominates" them. How close is your Sun from the Asc? Did you mention that you are Leo Asc?
Yes, My Sun is in the 12th house. My Sun - ~8 degrees of Cancer (12th), and my Asc - 8 degrees of Leo Ah, so that's not only asc issue. Interesting. IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 6866 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted September 11, 2018 05:55 PM
Yes. I believe that that is the issue here.Your Asc ruler is the Sun. And the Sun is in the 12th house. The Sun in 12th house colours the personality and makes one the "behind the scenes" type. So even when Asc is in Leo, the ruler or king of the 1st house (Sun) is concerned with not being seen. Interesting. Privacy may be something that you treasure very much. As well as self preservation. So when interacting with others, its could be as I suggested i.e that you are more "yourself" alone than with others. Because when with others you are in more of the responsive mode(12th) to their energy. And the instinctive self merges with that energy seamlessly. So it's confusing in that you wonder :am I being myself or am I responding to how others think I should be? Dichotomy here is that even through merging with others or "hiding" etc. You are being yourself. As the nature of Neptune ruled 12th which influences your Asc expression, IS the "mask" as well as the person underneath. This is the dual nature of mutable energy. In that you can be both what you are AND what you are not. So many times Neptune strong people (NEP on a angle) feel like they are not showing their "true selves". It is not so. The energy merges with all that is and is still the energy " behind " all that is. So separation is not necessary and is likely futile because that is what the energy is. I hope u are following all this lol. I have Sun-Neptune conjunct and so I could be talking in circles right now IP: Logged |
Claudine Knowflake Posts: 145 From: Registered: Mar 2016
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posted September 11, 2018 06:23 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Yes. I believe that that is the issue here.Your Asc ruler is the Sun. And the Sun is in the 12th house. The Sun in 12th house colours the personality and makes one the "behind the scenes" type. So even when Asc is in Leo, the ruler or king of the 1st house (Sun) is concerned with not being seen. Interesting. Privacy may be something that you treasure very much. As well as self preservation. So when interacting with others, its could be as I suggested i.e that you are more "yourself" alone than with others. Because when with others you are in more of the responsive mode(12th) to their energy. And the instinctive self merges with that energy seamlessly. So it's confusing in that you wonder :am I being myself or am I responding to how others think I should be? Dichotomy here is that even through merging with others or "hiding" etc. You are being yourself. As the nature of Neptune ruled 12th which influences your Asc expression, IS the "mask" as well as the person underneath. This is the dual nature of mutable energy. In that you can be both what you are AND what you are not. So many times Neptune strong people (NEP on a angle) feel like they are not showing their "true selves". It is not so. The energy merges with all that is and is still the energy " behind " all that is. So separation is not necessary and is likely futile because that is what the energy is. I hope u are following all this lol. I have Sun-Neptune conjunct and so I could be talking in circles right now
Oh, don't worry, I got your idea very clearly. You are right, sometimes I respond to the energies of other people, I forgot about this characteristic. But it's funny, even though I respond to others, I still can sometimes say that with someone I am not very self or I don't like that role that they "gave" to me. So I can observe the energy flow and make some conclusions. To be honest, this is so complicated and twisted but I understand things that you are saying to me. >Privacy may be something that you treasure very much. As well as self preservation. So when interacting with others, its could be as I suggested i.e that you are more "yourself" alone than with others. This is for sure IP: Logged |
kani Knowflake Posts: 379 From: Registered: Oct 2018
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posted January 29, 2019 04:16 AM
First of all, I don't really date. I hate them. Hate the expectations around them and the feelings of awkwardness around it. I'm not good with anything that has a label on it - and a date has one. But, ok. Still we are talking about dating here. I'm horrible to date because I'm very very very slow to let anyone into my heart. It just doesn't happen that quickly and men think I'm either playing and being emotionally cold. I'm not. I can be hot and cold at times though. I need a lot of freedom and I'll be quite blunt from the beginning (I'm much nicer to friends haha). with men I'm sexually interested in I can be a bit blunt and initiating arguments. It is fun for me, but not all of them appreciate it. They think I'm ridiculing them or taking the **** but I'm not. I reckon that is some type of foreplay for me. I can be quite unclear with my emotions, which I find annoying myself and it confuses the other party, tooIP: Logged |