posted January 30, 2019 06:52 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Nah...seen worse.

North node in 7th pushes one to try and try again.Whilst Saturn in 8th wants you to master intimacy issues. You are driven by something bigger than choice. Its super consciousness of who tou really, really are.

I do think that Nep/Uranus conj the Dsc can be challenging. Commuting with others on a purely superficial level is exhausting emotionally.

Neptune tends to dig deep. Uranus loves novelty but is prone to "cut off" if it gets mundane. And with the added Sun in 12th, you dwell in the open-ended realm of possibilities. Being fine staying there.

All that is not an easy mix to find in anyone anywhere. So the mate eventually chosen will make most people(relatives) scratch their heads and ask "really? That's what you choose?".

I stated earlier that Neptune/Uranus are difficult to pin down. But age brings clarity. Whether you eventually choose to go without romantic leanings, is an open ended answer. However,I would not rule out a partner. The more unconventional, the better.

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What if I told you that North Node doesn't make me try at all? My main life themes are losses emotionally affecting me, hospitals and health issues (mine and others') not relationships really.

8th H cusp is in Aqua with Saturn on and in it. Transits Saturn and Saturn in synastries has acted like an obstacle preventing something from happening instead of experiencing it. No glue, no rewards, no mastering.. How can you master something when you don't experience it? Since Saturn brings delay (the delay may last forever actually)

Aqua is detached maybe Saturn wants me to learn how to be detached which would make sense since loss of beloved people seems to be a theme. That to me is teaching me that it is not worth it to bond with others.

Uranus ruler of 8th H conjuncts 7th H of relationships. It still feels like detachment is a theme here.

Being alone is ideal for me but I'm curious to know what you consider worse?
I've seen so many people over 30s to late 40s
who have never been in relationships and it's a classic mix of Uranus/NN/Saturn somehow involved with their 7th H.

posted January 30, 2019 09:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
That Venus in 12th is the social separation I think. And its further prompted by Uranus in 7th.

I don't find Uranus in 7th as indicative of single status(Mars in 7th on the other hand can be). It suggests to me that the individual is looking for a highly cerebral partner with whom to share philosophies with.

Its not impossible to find such a mate. But it can be daunting to search. So that is why its termed "unusual partner". Because the partner is likely to not be someone conventional really. A very "out of the box" native for sure .

There is likely to be physical separation from the partner for very long periods. Even years. But the mental closeness remains intact. And is not easily destroyed. That's Uranus in action

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posted January 30, 2019 09:39 PM            

moon in aries. (square uranus and neptune) i'm selfish as f*ck, dunno if i'm even fit for relationships.

sag sun / mercury in 5th trine leo rising: anyone with me has got to be ok with my constant need to have fun and party. *shrug* and they have to let me do stupid things and not care about the consequences.

posted January 31, 2019 12:33 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I suspected as much. I know of someone with a tight opposition between Venus/Mars. And it was as if I am talking to her when you wrote that.

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Haha.

So the last guy I fell in love with... I tried to show all my niceties when we first met, but I ended up scolding a guy outside the toilet and he witnessed it. He was quite shocked as the whole night before this I was sweet, funny, flirtatious.

posted January 31, 2019 04:30 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Haha.

So the last guy I fell in love with... I tried to show all my niceties when we first met, but I ended up scolding a guy outside the toilet and he witnessed it. He was quite shocked as the whole night before this I was sweet, funny, flirtatious.

But surprisingly it didn't turn him off. He got intrigued. LOL

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I don't understand why he should be turned off in the first place tbh. I wouldn't feel good about someone showing just his good side. It's not realistic and it would make me feel like a stranger like we have a typical relationship and I can not trust him. People get angry/bored/tired/etc. I'm commenting because I see it often around me but with girls, they try to show their good face in front of the guys they like. I'm not saying that you should be a b*tch or treat someone bad for no reason I mean they try to hard to be what they consider "good" all the time. Of course at some point they get tired of it.

posted January 31, 2019 07:46 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
I don't understand why he should be turned off in the first place tbh. I wouldn't feel good about someone showing just his good side. It's not realistic and it would make me feel like a stranger like we have a typical relationship and I can not trust him. People get angry/bored/tired/etc. I'm commenting because I see it often around me but with girls, they try to show their good face in front of the guys they like. I'm not saying that you should be a b*tch or treat someone bad for no reason I mean they try to hard to be what they consider "good" all the time. Of course at some point they get tired of it.

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I'm glad you say this because I too find it tiring to always put on my best front, just that I get comments that I look feisty, unfriendly, etc and it gets to me sometimes because I'm not trying to be like that and I'm not an aggressive person.

So I thought maybe it's how I projected myself...

posted January 31, 2019 12:20 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
What if I told you that North Node doesn't make me try at all? My main life themes are losses emotionally affecting me, hospitals and health issues (mine and others') not relationships really.

8th H cusp is in Aqua with Saturn on and in it. Transits Saturn and Saturn in synastries has acted like an obstacle preventing something from happening instead of experiencing it. No glue, no rewards, no mastering.. How can you master something when you don't experience it? Since Saturn brings delay (the delay may last forever actually)

Aqua is detached maybe Saturn wants me to learn how to be detached which would make sense since loss of beloved people seems to be a theme. That to me is teaching me that it is not worth it to bond with others.

Uranus ruler of 8th H conjuncts 7th H of relationships. It still feels like detachment is a theme here.

Being alone is ideal for me but I'm curious to know what you consider worse?
I've seen so many people over 30s to late 40s
who have never been in relationships and it's a classic mix of Uranus/NN/Saturn somehow involved with their 7th H.

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This is interesting that you mentioned 7th house and losses. But you then mentioned Saturn in Aqua in 8th being more indicative of that. And i am inclined to agree with you.

I have Uranus in 8th. In whole sign astrology,Saturn is in the 8th house. And what you said about "mastering loss" hit the spot.

Check this out,the ruler of your 7th is in the 8th. And the ruler of your 8th(Uranus) is in the 7th. So this double whammy does highlight that relationships (7th) centre around the themes of loss(8th).

Wow. Very interesting indeed. And since your NN is there, thats what you deal with often. Thank you for that insight.

I wonder though if you are meant to master the "art" of letting go of relationships. Learning to become independent of them. Maybe a writer or counsellor for divorce,loss of partnership and letting go?

The South Node being in Aries suggests that its natural to be independent and go your own way.You have done that many liifetimes.

So perhaps in this life you are being called to dispense of your pearls of wisdom as to how to go at life alone? Especially in a world that wants to couple up so much. Even when its not favourable.

In a way,the 7th does rule consultancy. The ability to relate to another on a one on one basis.

posted January 31, 2019 12:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by polkadotstars:
Aries Venus, I had to literally restrain myself from not texting guys so much in the beginning. Hey, if I'm interested they should know and we should get this on the road already! Why wait and play stupid games?! :-)

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Yes...girl.Yes!!!! Lol.

And what red hot blooded man wouldn't like that? Say Aries/Leo Mars? Perhaps even intense Scorpio too?

But i do get what you are saying. You are someone who is clear about what they want whilst the rest of us are still fumbling around and trying to find the light.

My sister shares your sentiment (Aries Venus). So I get you

posted January 31, 2019 12:36 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dons2angelss:
Yes, I don't go for the status qou at all, but I need, NEED, freedom. I'm so extremely independent that it puts people off. I don't want to be asked what I'm doing tonight, or this weekend. I don't want to "own" someone. I also have an exact moon/Pluto conjunction so I do need an extremely deep bond but it can't smother me or expect me to clip my wings to keep it alive. That bond should fly with me and push me higher.
My 12th house venus is also intercepted opposite Saturn... Yikes. So that makes it even harder to form that deep bond of trusting someone. Uranus in the 7th demands freedom and for me, it includes every freedom there is. I won't sacrifice that, not even for my hades moon.

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posted January 31, 2019 12:40 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Selenite:
i'm a mars-saturn-pluto person. god help the ones who try to control me or set any kind of restrictions on my behavior. i'll try to be decent and what u see is what u get!

moon in aries. (square uranus and neptune) i'm selfish as f*ck, dunno if i'm even fit for relationships.

sag sun / mercury in 5th trine leo rising: anyone with me has got to be ok with my constant need to have fun and party. *shrug* and they have to let me do stupid things and not care about the consequences.

venus in scorpio trine saturn in the 7th might be my only saving point

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posted January 31, 2019 12:54 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Haha.

So the last guy I fell in love with... I tried to show all my niceties when we first met, but I ended up scolding a guy outside the toilet and he witnessed it. He was quite shocked as the whole night before this I was sweet, funny, flirtatious.

But surprisingly it didn't turn him off. He got intrigued. LOL

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We have a local celeb hunk with Mars/Venus in Libra who is known to be quite rude to fans. I think Pluto conjuncts both Venus/Mars also in Libra(but very wide 10 degree orb).

I find the sweet and spicy mix of Venus/Mars very interesting. Some are super nice whilst others are quite nasty.

DMX has the conjunction in Scorpio. He looks like a brute. But bos sex appeal endured all that for a long time. Well thats until the chickens came to roost and jail seemed the inevitable outcome.

posted January 31, 2019 03:14 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
I'm glad you say this because I too find it tiring to always put on my best front, just that I get comments that I look feisty, unfriendly, etc and it gets to me sometimes because I'm not trying to be like that and I'm not an aggressive person.

So I thought maybe it's how I projected myself...

So with my guy I tried to be all sugary (lol) because he was so nice and polite, but I'm glad he didn't get scared away. In fact, he seems to like my feistiness. I usually try not to swear but the 2x I did, it made him laugh.

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Yes! That's exactly it.
You have to be yourself in order to find someone who likes you for the real you, not for just the good/half/fake side of you. No one will be able to "pretend" or hide parts of himself for too long. When the hidden side is revealed the partner will be right to be disappointed and feel betrayed.
If you are feisty or unfriendly then you need someone with "balls" who will like you enough to approach you. If you dislike cursing however you should change that permanently not just in fron of others. If you are ok with it though then don't have to change it just because others dislike it.

posted January 31, 2019 03:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Got you. Perhaps this thread should be renamed to "How unavailable are you?"

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posted January 31, 2019 04:20 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
This is interesting that you mentioned 7th house and losses. But you then mentioned Saturn in Aqua in 8th being more indicative of that. And i am inclined to agree with you.

I have Uranus in 8th. In whole sign astrology,Saturn is in the 8th house. And what you said about "mastering loss" hit the spot.

Check this out,the ruler of your 7th is in the 8th. And the ruler of your 8th(Uranus) is in the 7th. So this double whammy does highlight that relationships (7th) centre around the themes of loss(8th).

Wow. Very interesting indeed. And since your NN is there, thats what you deal with often. Thank you for that insight.

I wonder though if you are meant to master the "art" of letting go of relationships. Learning to become independent of them. Maybe a writer or counsellor for divorce,loss of partnership and letting go?

The South Node being in Aries suggests that its natural to be independent and go your own way.You have done that many liifetimes.

So perhaps in this life you are being called to dispense of your pearls of wisdom as to how to go at life alone? Especially in a world that wants to couple up so much. Even when its not favourable.

In a way,the 7th does rule consultancy. The ability to relate to another on a one on one basis.

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You're very welcome

I'm afraid I understand it the way you do. Unfortunately my experiences seem to lead me where you described.
I said that I'm ok being alone, I was talking about intimate relationships though. Even when I fall in love it's so hard because my emotions are intense but I still can not be into a real relationship.
Friendships is my fav kind of relationship, I can be friends with anyone including relatives if I like their personalities and we click. I still am ok being alone but the pain of loss is immense and lasts too long imo I bet I have to thank Lord Saturn for that too.
Something else which I find weird is that the men I've loved the most (dad, friend and uncle) all died but the women (2 besties and an aunt) were just out of my life or far from me. What's even more weird is that I know and it's proven that these men were to be in my life no matter what which means the only way to lose them was death (theirs or mine, but since I have to experience the pain I must be the one to keep being alive). It kind if freaks me out because it feels like if someone I'll love (male specifially) wants to be into my life for good he will die just because I have to lose all people I love.

I've read that Saturn in 8th H wants the native to learn how to let go but most concentrate on the sexual and mutual sharing. I can see how your version of letting go absolutely makes sense.

Pluto squaring Venus, Mars and Jup I guess has to do with it too since we're talkimg about the 8th H.

It's also true that I do help others in those ways.. I mean I have lots of Neptune going on too but I especially feel like I have to make women understand that if one of the two sexes can live alone then that is women. We are not spoiled and we learn to do things from a very young age which is somehow expected from us but it's not the same for men. We work and when we have children we are completely alone in it. I don't think any man is even interested to understand how difficult it is to have children unless he is somehow forced to raise them alone. The problem woth men is that they don't want to understand because they are used in having everything ready. So in the end women do everything by themselves. I wish I was a man because they have it so much easier but at the same time women are heroes and it's not easy by any means.. it's not even positive because life s*cks like that.
I do feel good when I make them feel more confident because I find it unfair and it kind of makes me angry how women lower themselves and feel bad just because men are being as**oles. I am not helping them short term. like talking with them and make them feel good for those few moments, I feel like they indeed realise their worth and how much better they are by themselves especially from a practical point of view. Like they suddenly wake up. A proof is the way they are generally more positive and open about their freedom and how they handle their next relationships which are more on the free side. That is a big deal here for women over 35-40 because they still have those old fashion thoughts.

Aries you have Uranus in 8th H in Placidus right? (I don't like whole/equal and a few others I've tried from the ones I've tried on astro.com because althpugh I can relate on Saturn in 7th H since I have Cap DSC anyway, there is nothing else to explain my Saturn in 8th H, plus I don't relate to 8th H Moon even though I have Pisces Moon which is the closest to Scorpio Moon) I'm very interested actually in it since mine is in Aqua. I guess whatever I experience sloooowly because of Saturn you experience it but the difference is the lasting time maybe you have some good experience instead of just negative ones?

I remember you have Cancer Moon even if it's in hard aspect to Mars it's still a water moon so Uranus in 8th H must be hard for you too.

posted January 31, 2019 09:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
We have a local celeb hunk with Mars/Venus in Libra who is known to be quite rude to fans. I think Pluto conjuncts both Venus/Mars also in Libra(but very wide 10 degree orb).

I find the sweet and spicy mix of Venus/Mars very interesting. Some are super nice whilst others are quite nasty.

DMX has the conjunction in Scorpio. He looks like a brute. But bos sex appeal endured all that for a long time. Well thats until the chickens came to roost and jail seemed the inevitable outcome.

My Mom has the opposition between Venus( Cap)and Mars(Cancer). And she is well liked by people wherever she works. That is even though she considers herself a loner (Saturn in Leo opposite Aquarius Chiron).

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You're right, it's really a mix. I can be super nice to people, at times biting...depending on how they rub off me (and my mood for the day, really). Recently I was talking to a guy (smiling...being nice and all) then he said something which insulted me and I told him off right away, like: "I don't care WTF people think of me". He was taken aback because I was all "angelic" just 30secs ago. My Venus is also opposing Moon forming a t-square with Mars at the apex - a grand mix.

posted February 01, 2019 12:26 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dons2angelss:
😂 😂, now that one fits perfectly.

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posted February 02, 2019 01:32 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
You're very welcome

I'm afraid I understand it the way you do. Unfortunately my experiences seem to lead me where you described.

I said that I'm ok being alone, I was talking about intimate relationships though. Even when I fall in love it's so hard because my emotions are intense but I still can not be into a real relationship.[QUOTE]

This right here. THIS

I know exactly what you mean and I wonder if your Sun in Cancer(I think it was) is in the 3rd or 4th house?Because it sounds like it could be from the 3rd house due to the intellectual approach you take.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
Friendships is my fav kind of relationship, I can be friends with anyone including relatives if I like their personalities and we click.

I still am ok being alone but the pain of loss is immense and lasts too long imo I bet I have to thank Lord Saturn for that too. [QUOTE]

This here is Pluto. People often overlook the fact that the BIGGER the momentum there is to love. The harder it is to recover from its disappointment,breaking up or loss.

Pluto has the longest momentum of all. And perhaps i haven't said this before, but those with Pluto-Venus,Pluto in 7th, Pluto ruling the 7th,Pluto in 5th or Pluto ruling the 5th etc. Tend to be "all in" when it comes to giving it all in the name of attaining the ultimate intimacy.

The problem is always reciprocation. As few can match their intensity and oftentimes their intense nature could be mistaken for being "psychotic" or even "crazy".

And because of this,many fear their own intensity and seem a lot more "aloof", "stoic" or build high walls that monitor the intensity and keep it from surfacing.

But there is longing. Deep longing to find that one person. That individual who will accept ALL of them and love every bit of who they are.

Secretly, there could be a request sent out to the universe for such a partner. One who can "match" them and from that union, separation,loss and related fears of "interrupted love"can be done away with altogether and forever. At last forever.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
Something else which I find weird is that the men I've loved the most (dad, friend and uncle) all died but the women (2 besties and an aunt) were just out of my life or far from me.

What's even more weird is that I know and it's proven that these men were to be in my life no matter what which means the only way to lose them was death (theirs or mine, but since I have to experience the pain I must be the one to keep being alive).

It kind if freaks me out because it feels like if someone I'll love (male specifially) wants to be into my life for good he will die just because I have to lose all people I love. [QUOTE]

This is exactly what I touched on above and is the same as Taurus' fear of being "interrupted" when loving someone and having to let go of them. Hence Taurus' more possessive nature.

But Scorpio's one is that detachment is even more difficult for a water sign(all about merging). So the interruption memory and associated pain,lives on in memory the mind to remind them of how "dangerous" intimacy is.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
It's also true that I do help others in those ways.. I mean I have lots of Neptune going on too but I especially feel like I have to make women understand that if one of the two sexes can live alone then that is women.

We are not spoiled and we learn to do things from a very young age which is somehow expected from us but it's not the same for men.

We work and when we have children we are completely alone in it. I don't think any man is even interested to understand how difficult it is to have children unless he is somehow forced to raise them alone.

The problem wIth men is that they don't want to understand because they are used to having everything ready. So in the end women do everything by themselves.

I wish I was a man because they have it so much easier but at the same time women are heroes and it's not easy by any means.. it's not even positive because life s*cks like that.

I do feel good when I make them feel more confident because I find it unfair and it kind of makes me angry how women lower themselves and feel bad just because men are being as**oles.

I am not helping them short term(like talking with them and make them feel good for those few moments), I feel like they indeed realise their worth and how much better they are by themselves especially from a practical point of view.

Like they suddenly wake up:A proof is the way they are generally more positive and open about their freedom and how they handle their next relationships (which are more on the free side). That is a big deal here for women over 35-40 because they still have those old fashion thoughts.[QOUTE]

I agree with this sentiment 101% . Male privilege is real and as a man myself, I take it for granted.

Barring those who are in consummate loving and fulfilling marriages/relationships,I often ask myself what some women actually "gain" from marriage?

Is it the fear of being physically harmed? And so the husband serves as a "live in" bodyguard? But i don't see many men serving this role to the best of their abilities at all.

I read an article that a couple was attacked whilst walking around a park area in my local neighborhood. And guess what? The guy ran for his life leaving the girl to face the music all on her own

So this incident made me think that perhaps for other women, men serve as a sexual function? But they don't earn high honors here either.

Many men don't make their women climax whilst others have no clue about how to be a proper husband, father and "head of the house".

And yet many such women accept the scraps they are given. Meekly take what is of no real value because the alternative(being alone) is all too scary.

Even if they(women) inevitably end up driving the relationship all on their own i.e they have to attend to their own needs as well as the man's, they have to hold the relationship together, they are the ones who are more concerned with "making it work" etc.

I resent the fact that Steve Harvey books "Think like a man act like lady" exist to "school" women on how to attract a man. And yet the books of how to school.men to be better boyfriends and be better partners ,are less popular.

Its your Moon in Pisces in 8th i think, that identifies and empathizes with women on the whole. This also offering encouragement because you understand the hardships they encounter.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
Aries you have Uranus in 8th H in Placidus right? (I don't like whole/equal and a few others I've tried from the ones I've tried on astro.com because althpugh I can relate on Saturn in 7th H since I have Cap DSC anyway, there is nothing else to explain my Saturn in 8th H, plus I don't relate to 8th H Moon even though I have Pisces Moon which is the closest to Scorpio Moon) I'm very interested actually in it since mine is in Aqua. I guess whatever I experience sloooowly because of Saturn you experience it but the difference is the lasting time maybe you have some good experience instead of just negative ones? [QUOTE]

By the way, I can see that Moon in 8th applying to you. The Moon speaks of intimacy and the 8th house of loss. So there is loss of intimacy or the ties that bind with many Moon in 8th house people-particularly with female figures in their life.

If the Moon is connected to the Sun( as in your case with the ruler of the Sun being in the 8th house), it often suggests the early loss of the father or male figures who often played a more maternal role (Cancer)

My Saturn in Scorpio has had a mixed bag so far.

On the one hand,it has taught me to be self sufficient and satisfied with my own company. And to learn to be okay with myself and desist being "hungry" for another's love.

On the other hand however,there is sexual frustration that is brought about through moments of "weakness" where I ask myself if indeed I am truly facing the road of life alone without an intimate partner to experience sexual with?

It does eat me up sometimes and I do feel heartache as a result of longing. The Universe listens to me(no doubt) and so I have no question that things are getting into alignment.

Its just that things in life are a matter of timing. That is all. So i do smile and look foward to opportunities.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Plut0nian2:
I remember you have Cancer Moon even if it's in hard aspect to Mars it's still a water moon so Uranus in 8th H must be hard for you too.

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I think that Mars/Moon has me assert the strong feelings I have. Detachment from them is near impossible. I feel things with sharp clarity. Sometimes painfully so.

So for instance, no matter how much someone says that they love me. My feelings are achingly "clear" about whether this is good for me or not when I am on a date or conversing with the said person.

The Uranus in 8th makes the search for intimacy unique indeed. I failed to mention to you that Saturn in 8th/Moon in 8th also points to "sexuality access points" when it comes to ones proclivities.

So in my case, intellectual stimulation and intimacy is a must for sexual closeness to be had(Uranus is in Sag). And I am less "wham bam, thank you sir" than most guys. So my view of "sex" is more eclectic and all encompassing(Jupiter rules Sag) than just pure physical penetration etc.

With you, Saturn in 8th can have one be turned on by responsible men or those with an "detached" aura about them.As Saturn is also about paternity on one hand, but intellectual precision(Aqua) on the other.

So there could be something paternal or "Daddy" like about the men you find "sexy". Or perhaps something quirky,goofy and a little unorthodox/awkward about them too.

I wonder how you feel about Sun/Moon/Venus/Mars in Aqua guys? Even those with Uranus/Saturn on the said planets.

I don't know if you know of the series "Ray Donovan"? The actor there comes across chilly cold even with Venus Sun and a strong Libra chart.

There is also something awkward about his looks i.e he aint exactly "ugly".But he is also not a Chris Hemsworth "pretty boy" type.

My thinking is that Aqua Saturn in 8th could be drawn to men with strange sex appeal. Like you have to really look at the individual twice(maybe thrice) to understand the appeal.

posted February 02, 2019 03:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Don't be so sure about that Saturn in 7th however. I have the conjunction of Venus/Saturn in 7th. Expert at how tp relate. But in a relationship?Nope

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posted February 02, 2019 03:29 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Selenite:
Eh?? why not? are we too serious?
actually i've noticed my partners tend to be the serious ones. they all want to 'fix' me, which never goes down well.

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I have not had great luck with love relationships. I fare better in friendships.

I think Saturn in 7th in my case blocks or is the gatekeeper when it comes to relationships. I just don't get them lasting past infancy phase.

The problem is me. I know.I am learning that in this life,I have to go at it alone.

posted February 03, 2019 02:18 AM            

My moon square Uranus and my afflicted Uranus/neptune in general starts to tell me to run away. I'm so scared to commit myself to someone who isn't "perfect" (my virgo placements talking), but all I ever wanted was a safe and committed relationship (scorpio Venus conjunction Pluto)!
So this also often makes me stay even though I find it extremely hard, so it makes me a mixture of passive aggressive, whiny, depressed, clingy, jealous and loving.

Eventually my partner gets tired of my **** at this point and starts rejecting me, but if he does exactly this, I start to become a drama queen who doesnt get the attention and love that I think I deserve, and I start to criticize and blame him for not caring.

After this point the relationship has become a living Hell and one or the other breaks up!

So yeah, I think we can conclude who won the prize of being the most undateable person.....

I guess I haven't found the right person yet, but it also just feels like I am putting way too high expectations and putting myself on a piedestal, thinking I'm deserving more than I am willing to fight for anyways, because I'm too emotionally broken to really give in.

posted February 03, 2019 06:26 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
I think through the years I've gotten more and more broken inside, so it is probably the best thing to leave me alone. But the thing is I just can't stand the loneliness, so I often end up in short-term relationships with a lot of pain.[QUOTE]

I get you. They are short term because they are not fulfilling. And its that short term that produces the feelings of dis-ease(another manifestation of Moon-Uranus aspect)

[QUOTE]Originally posted by next to neptune:
I'm a Virgo sun conjunction Mars, so I'm very picky and got too high standards and expectations to begin with. I put out a Lot of tests, to check my partner to see if they would be able to handle me when I'm in a bad mood (it's really stupid)

I try to be very logical and think a lot about if we're compatible long-term, and what issues could arise (and often I use astrology for this). [QUOTE]

So u live out possible relationships in your head?Lol. I do this too. And its from this vantage point that I decide whether the person is "worth" it or not.

The notso great part is that the other person doesn't get to argue their point. You don't get to see their input as you continually focus on your point of view and vantage point. So it will always be one sided.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by next to neptune:
After a very short time my pisces moon and scorpio Venus hits in, and I get very clingy, over sensitive, sometimes jealous and possessive. [QUOTE]

I think its because you could want to be in the throws of a relationship so badly. That the emotional adrenaline takes over and heightens emotions over a short period of time.

This is sort of like a hot dry desert that gets a small drop of water. The heat literally burns the water into steam in seconds.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by next to neptune:
It gets really hard for me if the guy I'm with is not my "perfect match". My moon square Uranus and my afflicted Uranus/neptune in general starts to tell me to run away.

I'm so scared to commit myself to someone who isn't "perfect" (my virgo placements talking), but all I ever wanted was a safe and committed relationship (scorpio Venus conjunction Pluto)![/B ][QUOTE]

Your Moon/Uranus combo longs for novelty. Its the conjunction of Venus /Pluto that has such high momentum and hopes of what a relationship entails. That they will only settle for those that give them a heightened sense of experience (emotionally) that they expected.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by next to neptune:
[B]So this also often makes me stay even though I find it extremely hard, so it makes me a mixture of passive aggressive, whiny, depressed, clingy, jealous and loving.

Eventually my partner gets tired of my **** at this point and starts rejecting me, but if he does exactly this, I start to become a drama queen who doesnt get the attention and love that I think I deserve, and I start to criticize and blame him for not caring.

After this point the relationship has become a living Hell and one or the other breaks up!

So yeah, I think we can conclude who won the prize of being the most undateable person..... [QUOTE]

You stay because you fear the alternative i think(being single).

Its easy to blame another for not fulfilling you than it is at looking at oneself and looking to oneself for fulfillment.

Admittedly if you don't like your partner, it can make things much worse. Like you two have no gravitational point where you two meet. A mutual beneficial point. So one is often really better off being single.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by next to neptune:
I guess I haven't found the right person yet, but it also just feels like I am putting way too high expectations and putting myself on a piedestal, thinking I'm deserving more than I am willing to fight for anyways, because I'm too emotionally broken to really give in.

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There is a lot about your perspective that looks at things from a "glass is half empty" perspective. And then expecting another to fill that glass up for you.

I am the same, the same, the same. I have terribly high standards too(Draco Venus in Virgo). And I say "terribly" high here because they change according to my moods. So its like asking my partner to chase and collect 10000 feathers on a windy day. I can identify.

The way around this is recognizing that perspective (mental) feeds emotions. Since you are a Virgo Sun(I suspect Mercury too?), you think of life from a mental plane(Sun). And your Moon then translates that perspective into feelings.

People with Gemini,Virgo,Aqua,Sag or Sun/Merc ,Sun/Jup or Sun/Ura tend to process life in a strongly mental way. So as they think, they feel. And as they feel, they think.

If there are aspects between Moon/Mercury, they can get into a loop that never ends i.e "I am alone because I am unlovable" and "I am unlovable and thats why i am alone" ,etc.

And with Pisces Moon, I am sure you feel one way one day and then another way another day. Or even an hour later etc. As mutable energy is very changeable and easily influenced.

When you are in a good mood. A really positive mood. Try this: go on a rampage about all that is good,how great you feel and build the momentum.

Then think of a love interest. And in that moment, notice how quickly your mood changes when you remember all the "wrong" things about them vs. recalling the "right "ones.

You dont HAVE to be in a relationship to feel good. But you have to allow yourself to feel better about yourself. And i mean that ALL the time. So a relationship(ironically) makes it harder.

People who don't "need" relationships attract them like flies to cow dung. And thats because people sense their aura as positive and affirming. So they become "attract" -ive to them.

And people who desperately "need" relationships, find that relationships (really good ones) escape them faster than doctors without borders leave Iran after their deployment is done. And that is because there is "desperation" in their aura.

Another way to think of this is when you are with having a choice to give money to two people:One constantly knocks on your door, throws pebbles on your window, cries at night whilst you are trying to sleep.And does all they can to get your attention.

The same beggar however decides one day that they have had enough of begging. They pack their stuff and go home.

They stop bothering you and when you see them again, they pass you on the street looking like they dont even "need" your money. Like they are indeed better off without it etc.

Which of the two people would you gladly give money to?

In my case, I have resolved myself to being single and enjoying every moment of being single. To stop trying to figure out what I am doing "wrong". And leave well enough alone.

I do self appreciation rampages and spend time doing things that I want to do. No obligations to anyone. Its all about me. And it feels fantastic.

But i do admit that loneliness is inevitable. There are isolated moments where i dream of an ideal partner. But those are shortlived once i start to fully appreciate how great i feel based on where i am.

I think that feeling isolated(different from being alone) is not unheard of. That is even for those within a relationship because its an individual mental state or condition. Not one that is shared.

So pairing up with someone distracts one for a while from those feelings. But they boomerang back with greater momentum. More especially if you have little in common with the mate, you may find yourself the loneliest person in the world.

posted February 03, 2019 04:39 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:

In my case, I have resolved myself to being single and enjoying every moment of being single. To stop trying to figure out what I am doing "wrong". And leave well enough alone.

I do self appreciation rampages and spend time doing things that I want to do. No obligations to anyone. Its all about me. And it feels fantastic.

But i do admit that loneliness is inevitable. There are isolated moments where i dream of an ideal partner. But those are shortlived once i start to fully appreciate how great i feel based on where i am.

I think that feeling isolated(different from being alone) is not unheard of. That is even for those within a relationship because its an individual mental state or condition. Not one that is shared.

So pairing up with someone distracts one for a while from those feelings. But they boomerang back with greater momentum. More especially if you have little in common with the mate, you may find yourself the loneliest person in the world.

Appreciate yourself. You are doing fine

---

Well, I wouldn't exactly say that I'm doing fine, based on my social and love life, but you're definitely also right about that I see everything in a very pessimistic light:P

I just havent yet learned how to truly appreciate my own company. I feel like I have been very alone my whole life almost, but I also do have the ability to form very close friendships with others, but I just havent been able to find this with a love interest yet, but its the thing that I want the most in my life

So trying to convince myself into enjoying being alone just feels so much like I would be lying to myself... because I just really dont want to be alone.

I can enjoy being alone once in a while, and do things for myself, because I also need a lot of personal space, also when I'm in a relationship, but eventually I start to feel really, really depressed and sad, if I dont get some intimate human contact, or get attention. Just talking with random people or coworkers isn't enough. Maybe I am just craving too much attention really...

My only air placement is my Libra mercury, but this probably tells a bit about why I need social contact so much and that I crave an intimate relationship.

And the fact that my libra mercury is the most afflicted planet in my whole chart (square neptune exact, and square jupiter, saturn and uranus, and part of a T-square) doesnt make it any better.

At least my moon and mercury don't interact at all, but if they did form an opposition, it could have completed my grand cross between moon, mercury, jupiter and saturn. But as it is, my moon and mercury each got their own T-square...

But anyways, people keep telling me the same thing, that I should learn how to love myself and enjoy my own company, then it would make me seem less desperate, and that would attract a partner.
I tried this over and over and so many times, without anything happened, so I think I just got enough and went back to my desperate good old self, believing that if I just start to kiss all the frogs, I'll eventually meet my prince. This hasn't been a great strategy however lol

So yeah, it seems like I am really stuck in some sort of loop afterall!

posted February 03, 2019 06:21 PM            

It might make a person with that combo feel secure if they have a good idea of whats happening in the world around them and know how to deal with potential problems before it becomes an issue.

You can do that with everyday life such as a car, your finances and etc....

But with people it gives off a creepy vibe....or you get it wrong!!!.

Ironically, one of my professors and best mentors (Geminis always learn alot form Sagittarius) he did his doctorate on computer security using anomaly detection and knowing what people are doing. Great level of security but its also creepy if you don't know why someone is collecting information on you.

I tend to follow the same model..to make me feel personally secure.

My Planets
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posted February 04, 2019 03:24 AM            

But Mars in Cancer/Moon in Aries doesn't go that far with snooping. Cancer and Aries are both too self concerned with regards to finding out all that much about other people.

My suspicions go to Pluto in Scorpio. Perhaps an inconjunct aspect with Mercury/Sun in Gemini? Giving Gemini a more obsessive quality than would be typical of Gemini.

Or a Pluto-Venus opposition which would be more in keeping with finding out things about another person. Defense against heartbreak etc.