posted October 13, 2018 05:21 AM            

But Aries23, I ask this, because you have so great insights, and you are male.

Do you know why often times guys, seem to not understand when one wants support and reassurances and Not "this is how you should solve this problem" type of "Advice"?

I get so frustrated and angry, at myself, for expecting this from my guy friends.

For ex we have an intellectual discussion, ok, I wont go into much details, but in this discussion, they often miss, I don't want their "objective view" on things.

I don't want "advice". Also no I don't want a "oh poor you" thing.

I just want my feelings to be aknowledged, like for ex "oh I understand how that must feel for you, it really sucks!

But dont be sad etcetc".

I mean, thise type of response, comes automatically for us females when we talk female to female.

But my guy friends, even when they are super empathic, and even when I say what I expect from them, and try to stear them away from giving "advice"

and just anowledge my feelings, they have a hard time getting it.

Is it because, they feel awkward with aknowledging feelings in someone?

Or just a male norm?

In the end, I just can't share anything emotional with them,

because they never can give support and I get disappointed at myself for wanting it.

For ex I can talk about how I feel like I never can repay my father, for everything he has done for me.

How he has givene his whole youth and life to take care of me etc.

Their response would be like;

"Yeah I don't think he expexts you to pay back all the money he has given you And also, you did not ask to be born to this life".

Wtf?! haha I just don't get it, how hard can it be to aknowledge emotions in an other person?

Is there an astrological explanation to this?

posted October 13, 2018 09:34 AM            

But on average, I don't see that many guys(even women in many cases) that likely to respond in any other way than what you described.

Masculinity mostly prescribes to the "1" energy. In that it sees life as a "survival of the fittest", "separate from other and alone in this world" mentality.

From an astrological perspective,its Aries energy. And the constant reminder of separation and insecurity in trying to believe anything other than that is the suspicious inconjunct aspect with protect yourself at all costs Scorpio.

With femininity, there is an instinctual "we" energy that characterizes the sacrifice of the ego and seeing the self as a reflection of another "2".After all 2 is made of "1" and "1". The acknowledgement of another that is just like you.

So this is where empathy,sympathy and feeling for another person comes from. And from an astrological perspective its Cancer.

Cancer relishes the womb for safety and security, protection and nurturance.

The memory of love is constant and so is the memory of the first unique bond or relationship with the caretaker/caregiver.

In the Cancer expression is also the memory of community,being a part of a whole ,detachment from personal ego for the greater "us" and the "we" philosophy of 8th house Aquarius.

As you may understand the interaction between masculine and feminine can be difficult. In that one is taught to have a "alone" mentality, whilst the other is internalizes the "we".

Not all women are "feminine" however and not all men are "masculine"(contrary to popular belief).But it often becomes clear when dealing with people on a case by case basis , which energy is dominant.

Guys who want relationships and prize getting along will often empathize and sympathize-seeing others as part of themselves. They could be dominated by the "2".

Guys who struggle to see complexities,tend to oversimplify things or have a "everyone is given the same shot in life" are typically "1" dominated.

posted October 14, 2018 05:52 PM            

I'm working on my thesis so thats why I'm respondig late, sorry!

Thank you for giving the astrological insights of it.

I'm very into neurology, psychology, behaviour etc, so I know from neurology stand point, male and female brains are wired differently, and yes there is the norms, upbringing, genetics etc.

Still, I just can not get, how hard it can be for some males, to just, connect more easily.

I mean, I'm very scared of exposing myself and my emotions aswell. But it will never hinder me, females need emotional connection.

Anyways, I have the almost same placements as one of your sisters,. I'm firstly plutonian, second strong planet is Mars followed by saturn, aries stellium, 8th house etc. So I don't back down easily, I won't for ex back off from uneasy discussions, or run away crying, albeit I'm petite and feminine outwardly so looks do decieve haha.

Moon is Conjunct Mars, I take Everything personally, when its friends and family.

What I mean is, I connect well with guys, since they understand I'm though. Although, I need them to have high Eq. If a guy is insenstive with no empathy for MY feelings, then bye.

Sorry, I don't wanna rumble! I'm sure you are familiar with the energy I'm describing, having a sis with alike placements:P

One of the guys have 7th house stellium, venus libra etc. So he seems so, great at connecting with the ying energy in himself.
He makes me feel secure and like, he gets female emotions. He sure has very high EQ.

Then some stuff happens, and I'm like "wtf, I feel so cheated, he don't get emotions at all!"

So even the most "libra" energy guy is still... a guy haha (omg wait, libra is a yang energy I believe? ). It feels like, libra just is all about tricking you into believing they can relate to you ...

One of the guys, can you believe it, we can start an emotional conversation, and I say upfrontly "I dont want advice". he will try his damnest to give emotional support, then, he will start to slip into totally different direction, where he startss to slip away from emotions and start to be "objective".

I will even sometimes stop him with "ok thats not what I mean, thats a different subject".

He will stop, ad say "yeah I know you wanna talk about the emotional part of the problem"..

but he just can't walk that path haha, he slips away, like, the road I wanna take is uncomfy, or messy or whatever..

Sorry I will stop now.. I sure have ocd when it comes to writing long posts!

posted October 15, 2018 01:51 AM            

I am familiar with 7th house energy myself. As Saturn has its accidental exaltation in the 7th and so Saturn behaves in a manner of judge and arbitrator there. And is very SERIOUS in that role.

Luckily there is also Scorpio energy in Saturn which takes on a more emotional approach in such matters. So there is also the need to "feel" the decisions made on the basis of weighing the emotional dynamics involved.

Libra typically is a sign ime with my Mars in Libra that tends to strive for emotional awareness (not feeling).

Libra energy has Pisces on the 6th house cusp suggesting that complexities of feelings and their nebulous nature rends to overwhelm them. And so they seek to control and administer some element of regulation over them(6th).

The 6th house in the solar chart or natal placement is the area of life where we face challenges regarding an inferiority complex. And thus try to overcompensate that may lead to health issues(6th).

Emotions tend to overwhelm air tbh. They must come in small doses and be given time to be processed.

But if they are hurled into an emotionally involving debate, the reactionary mode is to pull back and detach or build a wall of intellect discernment(which can easily be seen as emotional suppression or disengagement)

"Don't be so damn emotional about it. Its just an opinion" is what my ex Libra stellium (Sun ,Saturn,Jupiter and Pluto) used to say to my Sag stellium (Sun,Jupiter,Neptune and Uranus). And it used to drive me cray cray

In his way of thinking,you could disagree with someone and still eat dinner in the same table. This matters not whether the disagreement is on a political,racial or religious notion.

I tend to remove myself from volatile situations. I do admit that I get very sensitive and don't want to get violent or try to force others to agree(Pluto in 7th).

But you know what used to get him emotional or really touchy(if I can call it that),was the loss of creature comforts or losing something valuable(Taurus on the solar 8th cusp).

He would get really angry and emotional if his favourite watch was misplaced or missing. And I would say "Don't be so damne emotional. Its only an object!"

When I said that to him, he threw me out of his place. Displacing all Libra "calm" diplomacy and mannerisms lol.