posted July 21, 2024 06:03 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
For example if you have Mars conj Dsc (like me) or in house 7, the relationship partner is likely going to be someone who is easily triggered into anger or is very passionate. Because of the ardent nature of Mars, the relationship is likely to be demonstrative and loud. It can even degenerate to toxic levels. Even outright domestic violence (at worst).
The relationship may also surface anger (Mars) for the individual. Feelings that are very intense that the native has always dissociated with the self. As the 7th house is also about that part of us which we have distanced ourselves from, because we find it doesn't match what we perceive ourselves (1st house) to be.
I haven't seen this play out in my life in quite the full throttle mode as I have heard others who have thos placement have experienced.I think (in my case) it has yet to be triggered by a long-standing transit or progression to take form. I have been single for most of my life.
However, I do note that I attract the aggressive/assertive types. They are the type that pursue me and rarely the other way around. This has happened time and again. I can't remember when I ever initiated romantic interest on anyone. And when I do, it's not successful.
I have a similar dynamic in my chart, Aries23Degrees 😊 My DSC is Aries 27 deg, ruler Mars in 2H Sag conj Mercury square Jupiter 11H Virgo.
My father is an Aries Sun and I used to be victim of domestic violence alongside with my mom. And since then I tend to attract aggressive and selfish people, or there's always been some kind of issue regarding boundaries and assertiveness on either side in my human connections.
I have a preference for the evolved Aries kind of people - independent, self-made and assertive (this is what I also strive for as a late Libra ASC and 2H Sag Sun)
So far I've had only 2 bfs, and the negative side of the dynamic was present in both cases. For learning purposes, I guess... I've never been in love with either of them, both would have been better off as only friends (DSC ruler Mars square Jupiter 11H Virgo). I had to be the "pick me girl" and pursue them, which felt highly uncomfortable and unnatural to me.
I met the first guy via my friend network (11H). He lacked assertiveness in a major way in general, had confusion regarding his life path, and lived under one roof with his mom for so long, even after 30 as far as I know. I felt I always had to wear the pants and be some kind of substitute mom, but he didn't hurt or manipulate me in any way at all.
The second guy was kind of similar, only that I met him via my Summer job (2H) when I was a uni student. He was younger than me by 4 years, but turned out to have narcissistic tendencies. He has an Aries ASC (opposite of mine), and over time the egoistic part of him appeared. At first he was only emotionally and verbally abusive, then towards the end he became physically abusive towards me. An overall eye for an eye attitude was present on his part. Then came the love bombing, then everything went back to abuse, and I got tired of this endless cycle of his empty words and promises to change fairly early, thank God. The connection was very volatile and combative with frequent war between us, shouting and all. Highly incompatible, I've never felt seen or heard, but I learned to be assertive and stand up for my authentic self he never wanted to accept. The whole thing felt like as if he hated my true self, envied my energy to the extent of wanting to break it down, and constantly wanted to invade my space and life, and change me into someone I've never been, nor wanted to become just to appeal to him or his friend circle. I also had the sense he only wanted me around to brag to his friends and prove to them he wasn't some kind of incel dork who doesn't get a gf. As if I was some kind of shiny trophy to show off... Ego and powerplay. I managed to break out of this toxic sh**show on my own. When I broke up with him I got the remark that "you're gonna come back to me pretty soon, I know you cannot exist without me". Well, guess who is still waiting for me to go back... 😅
Since then, I didn't have anyone in my life, and I try to embody the positive manifestation of the Aries DSC energy. My Aqua Moon also helps to remain sober and detached when it is necessary. I only want authentic, wholesome and assertive/independent people in my life, anything less won't cut it for me.
I also noticed that from a young age I fell victim to catcalling A LOT, and a lot of creepy and pervert men following me on the street, etc. On a few occassions I was also harrassed and attacked on the street in daylight time. The last attack happened during the pandemic by an obsessed creep, and there were other people walking by, but nobody helped. So, I chose to fight back. In these cases I tend to choose either flight or fight, but I won't EVER freeze. Oh, the sweet and hard-fought assertiveness of mine... I have Venus and Pluto in Scorpio 1H (not conjunct) and I feel men either tend to over-sexualize me and project their dark desires on me a lot (while in reality I'm asexual and want absolutely nothing to do with things like that) Or, sense that I'm a powerful woman with strong perrsonality and they want to conquer and "domesticate" (damage) me for good.
Lindaland
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posted July 20, 2024 02:33 PM