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Author
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Topic: My mother is a homophobe
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Sibyl
Knowflake Posts: 522
From: Uranus
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 04, 2014 03:56 PM
  
quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Who's bullying who dear? LOL I find what you spew utterly unbearable and I can't contain my laughter. Unfortunately I can't post a video of myself laughing as quickly as I can with a picture, so I chose those that I've posted.
Well you know what? Right back at you. Except I'm not laughing because I think it is completely disrespectful. I try to, as much as I can, address you in a polite manner. I have not said YOU are ignorant, I have said your opinions are. I have also said that you are being judgmental in your opinions. There's a difference. I'm not going around calling you names. I'm certainly not laughing at your opinions. As much as I disagree with them I continue to argue with you because I do not think they are a laughing matter. I think they have the potential to hurt people, which makes this discussion important to me. I cannot believe that you can allow yourself to show such disrespect as you are displaying to me right now, all just because you are unable to properly defend your own opinions. IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 3557
From: Pluto with DeepFreeze
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 04:04 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Sibyl:
Well you know what? Right back at you. Except I'm not laughing because I think it is completely disrespectful. I try to, as much as I can, address you in a polite manner. I have not said YOU are ignorant, I have said your opinions are. I have also said that you are being judgmental in your opinions. There's a difference. I'm not going around calling you names. I'm certainly not laughing at your opinions. As much as I disagree with them I continue to argue with you because I do not think they are a laughing matter. I think they have the potential to hurt people, which makes this discussion important to me. I cannot believe that you can allow yourself to show such disrespect as you are displaying to me right now, all just because you are unable to properly defend your own opinions.
Properly defend? LOL there you go again. You disrespect me by throwing my faith and beliefs in my face. You say that you hope I will some day submit and agree. I don't want to and never will. If they hurt people then it's because they choose to be hurt by them. You act like what you say doesn't affect people Sibyl. I laugh at your inability to accept my opinion without trying to "correct" it. This is an issue bigger than us. That will never be set in stone and accepted by everyone. That's just the way it is. All I've said from the beginning is if you wanna be gay, be gay. Just don't force me into accepting it. Sexual anything should be left at home, in the bedroom. Who's calling who names? Did I ever say you're a bully? My opinions are not judgemental. I'm not judging anyone. IP: Logged |
YoursTrulyAlways
Knowflake Posts: 6931
From:
Registered: Oct 2011
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posted April 04, 2014 04:07 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Sexual anything should be left at home, in the bedroom.
And away from my kids.
IP: Logged |
Sibyl
Knowflake Posts: 522
From: Uranus
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 04, 2014 04:27 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Properly defend? LOL there you go again. You disrespect me by throwing my faith and beliefs in my face. You say that you hope I will some day submit and agree. I don't want to and never will. If they hurt people then it's because they choose to be hurt by them. You act like what you say doesn't affect people Sibyl. I laugh at your inability to accept my opinion without trying to "correct" it. This is an issue bigger than us. That will never be set in stone and accepted by everyone. That's just the way it is. All I've said from the beginning is if you wanna be gay, be gay. Just don't force me into accepting it. Sexual anything should be left at home, in the bedroom. Who's calling who names? Did I ever say you're a bully? My opinions are not judgemental. I'm not judging anyone.
Yes. You did say I was a bully; quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Sibyl the only issue I have with you is that you can't seem to just accept opinions and move on. You have to comment and pull apart things that you don't agree with. Are any of us doing that to you? How old are you? Are we in kindergarten? You don't bully people because you don't agree. It's that simple.
And I'm not gay. And geez, I'm glad, with all the grief they're getting! I also do, actually, agree that sexual stuff should be left in the bedroom. I don't like PDA any more than you do, I just don't think it's a "gay" problem, so I don't object to gays doing it anymore than I object to straight people doing it. Of course this issue is bigger than us, and we're only really representative of a much larger and very multifaceted debate. But Rome isn't built in a day, and you start where you are. Right now I'm here. So I'm addressing the things I see here that I don't agree with, and then I try to promote the things I DO agree with. I recognize that you probably come from a different place (in fact, I know you do). What I am saying is, where I'm from and where I'm not, the mainstream opinion. But I think you will understand me better if you understand that life, to me, is contention. I've been an elected politician, was involved in politics since 15, come from a family of politicians. I study politics, I breathe politics, and my one purpose in life is shaping politics (ie, the things I don't agree with). Of course no worldview will ever, as you say, be accepted by everyone, but opinions change over time, and it's the trend that is the most important. Everything starts small, and then it grows.
I believe gay people are being discriminated against and I do not think they have done a thing to deserve it. It is not just the hardliners that say they're the devil that are maintaining this trend, it is also people who don't speak out against it. Which is why I see it as my responsibility to voice my support for them. IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 3557
From: Pluto with DeepFreeze
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 04:41 PM
I agree they shouldn't be discriminated against. It's wrong. But neither is calling someone judgmental because of their beliefs. That's being judgemental. There are some who are judgemental with those beliefs. I am not one of those. I said bully in general. I never said that you were a bully personally. I do agree that everything starts small and then grows, however this will never be like interracial couples dating. They are two completely different things. Homosexuality will never be fully accepted. I wish people would just accept that and move on. People should be happy, live their lives privately. Who cares if everyone doesn't agree, that's apart of life. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 8275
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted April 04, 2014 04:56 PM
A lot of people feel uncomfortable with too much flirting regardless. It's wired in humans to feel uncomfortable when they see one person trying to connect with another at the exclusion of the rest because humans are so social and it's part of their survival instinct. So, when two people ignore others and focus on what they want it causes resentment and anger.
That's why when two people try to get closer in a public setting, you suddenly see these others that had no interest before suddenly stick their noses into their business and try to disrupt the process. IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Moderator Posts: 1375
From: The Beach
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 04, 2014 05:11 PM
The.... I.... what... the....Ugh.... I can't even read through this whole thread. Living in big cities for the past 25+ years and surrounding myself with bright and caring people, I forget there are people that still think the way some of the comments here portray. I suppose I should be thankful for the internet for showing me that there really are still people out there that... I really can't understand. That anyone believes that someone CHOOSES to be gay or that it's a condition that can be cured - mind-blowing. That seems so archaic to me. It would annoy me if my mother were homophobic, too, OP! I had some issues when I was younger with my step-father because he was racist. As far as I'm concerned, they are one and the same. IP: Logged |
coolingembers
Knowflake Posts: 556
From: California
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 05:18 PM
Ah, this topic is such perfect timing with GLSEN Day of Silence approaching, isn't it? Is anyone else participating? I am. I think I'm gonna break out my T-shirt with homophobic comments on it... My junior year in high school, after joining the unity club I got alot of hate. A lot, so I decided to make a t shirt with some of the slurs/labels I got, and wear it on day of silence to prove a point. With things like... "Its a choice!"
"Fag enabler."
"Well, you're friends with them so you must be gay too..."
"What a shame , such a pretty girl with no morals."
"You're going to hell." .... You sure do raise some hell. To clarify, I am straight. That's the backlash I recieved just from assumptions and ignorance.Think before you speak.
IP: Logged |
coolingembers
Knowflake Posts: 556
From: California
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 05:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by MoonWitch:
I had some issues when I was younger with my step-father because he was racist. As far as I'm concerned, they are one and the same.
IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
Knowflake Posts: 1510
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 05:42 PM
quote:
Originally posted by MoonWitch:
The.... I.... what... the....Ugh.... I can't even read through this whole thread. Living in big cities for the past 25+ years and surrounding myself with bright and caring people, I forget there are people that still think the way some of the comments here portray. I suppose I should be thankful for the internet for showing me that there really are still people out there that... I really can't understand. That anyone believes that someone CHOOSES to be gay or that it's a condition that can be cured - mind-blowing. That seems so archaic to me. It would annoy me if my mother were homophobic, too, OP! I had some issues when I was younger with my step-father because he was racist. As far as I'm concerned, they are one and the same.
 I'm sorry... I'm sorry....
I could NOT pass this up. So you're saying that you think the way you do as a result of where you live, not knowing that I don't come from exactly a small city that gets regular people moving here from Chicago or that my ex in-laws were from Dallas. As if we just live "in the sticks", shut off from the world.
Yet, you thank the internet for showing you that people like us exist as if we don't have the same tool to show us that gay people exist or get exposure to them.
Not to mention, there are 3 gay people in my department which is only 20 people among 3 shifts.
I have a cousin who is gay that I grew up with. I've had gay friends. Talk about judgmental
Learn about me first
Look in the mirror second. I just couldn't pass up the ridiculousness of this post.
It's right up there with the best.
IP: Logged |
Sibyl
Knowflake Posts: 522
From: Uranus
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 04, 2014 05:50 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
I agree they shouldn't be discriminated against. It's wrong. But neither is calling someone judgmental because of their beliefs. That's being judgemental. There are some who are judgemental with those beliefs. I am not one of those. I said bully in general. I never said that you were a bully personally. I do agree that everything starts small and then grows, however this will never be like interracial couples dating. They are two completely different things. Homosexuality will never be fully accepted. I wish people would just accept that and move on. People should be happy, live their lives privately. Who cares if everyone doesn't agree, that's apart of life.
Well, that's good. I do think it's possible that homosexuality could be universally accepted some day (with a few exceptions of course, there will always be SOMEONE to disagree with anything). I do, however, recognize that we are still far off from that. Anyway. Thank you for the exchange. It may not be obvious that I'm thinking about what you are saying, but I do (am still, I'm a slow one. I chew). And although I may not agree with your opinions, I don't think you're an awful person. But you decided to voice your opinions, and I disagreed so I decided to voice mine... And the exchange itself also gives me something. As I said, I thrive on contention. The challenge and all that.
I imagine there may still be a few things left to say in this debate but as of now I'm kind of depleted and, as I said, I have a big assignment due Monday that I need to focus on. So I'm going to try to stay away from it for now :-) It just gets me all riled up and I need zen. :-)
IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Moderator Posts: 1375
From: The Beach
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 04, 2014 05:54 PM
I don't think I even got to your posts in this thread, DeepFreeze. I wasn't reading usernames when I was reading comments because I was so flabbergasted. But thanks for letting me know how you feel. I am judgmental in that I have little tolerance for people that don't agree with basic human rights. I don't know if you fall into that category but your inflammatory response to me indicates that perhaps you do.And, no, I didn't say I think the way that I do because of where I live. I grew up in small town Texas and I knew as a child that it was wrong to discriminate against someone because of how they were born. I'm at a loss as to why you are naming your gay friends and cousin, though. How does that fit in anywhere? Frankly, I wasn't expecting anyone to get so defensive about my post. IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
Knowflake Posts: 1510
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 06:02 PM
quote:
Originally posted by MoonWitch:
I don't think I even got to your posts in this thread, DeepFreeze. I wasn't reading usernames when I was reading comments because I was so flabbergasted. But thanks for letting me know how you feel. I am judgmental in that I have little tolerance for people that don't agree with basic human rights. I don't know if you fall into that category but your inflammatory response to me indicates that perhaps you do.And, no, I didn't say I think the way that I do because of where I live. I grew up in small town Texas and I knew as a child that it was wrong to discriminate against someone because of how they were born. I'm at a loss as to why you are naming your gay friends and cousin, though. How does that fit in anywhere? Frankly, I wasn't expecting anyone to get so defensive about my post.
Just that I'm familiar with gays. They are no stranger to me.
I'm not telling gays not to have rights, but it doesn't mean that I have to accept it as "normal behavior" either.
I love my cousin and don't discriminate in the context of not taking to him or treating him equal, but I STILL don't have to accept it as "normal behavior" or say it's not a choice, etc. Everyone is jumping to conclusions about us and it's rather funny to be labeled judgmental when is equally being tossed right back. IP: Logged |
MoonWitch
Moderator Posts: 1375
From: The Beach
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 04, 2014 06:04 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
It is a choice in my opinion. You don't deny that it's unnatural correct? Two people of the same sex will never be able to have their own children ever. It's just not possible, it's not how we are made. We were made to create and fill the earth. How can you do so with a woman if your a woman? Or a man with a man?
If everyone used this logic, infertile heterosexual couples would also be "unnatural". IP: Logged |
Sibyl
Knowflake Posts: 522
From: Uranus
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 04, 2014 06:06 PM
Really, really not referring to anyone here, But in general terms, quote:
Originally posted by MoonWitch:
The.... I.... what... the....
Is the reaction I would also have to; Racism;
Animal Cruelty;
Sexism;
Fatophobia (not sure that is even a word?)
Domestic Abuse; I grew up so sheltered. Used to think that stuff was extinct until I entered my teens and some girls in my class said they wanted to have 10 babies "so the muslims won't take over". I was like
 Although I do remember kicking a boy's ass in the fifth grade because he was bullying a girl with down's... That stuff just doesn't fly. Okay, I'm out  IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
Knowflake Posts: 1510
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 06:09 PM
Even if I say it's a choice doesn't mean that I'm obligated to disrespect it.. I can still hold that belief at the same time. And how we handle it in our private lives (children) is our business IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 3557
From: Pluto with DeepFreeze
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 06:10 PM
quote:
Originally posted by MoonWitch:
I am judgmental in that I have little tolerance for people that don't agree with basic human rights.
Until it is set in stone and they have all the same rights as I do, can marry in any place that they'd like. Can have their own natural families, I and billions of other people will forever disagree with you. I think it's just as evil and shouldn't be tolerated for people to be judged for something that they don't agree or accept. IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 3557
From: Pluto with DeepFreeze
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 06:12 PM
quote:
Originally posted by MoonWitch:
If everyone used this logic, infertile heterosexual couples would also be "unnatural".
That's not the point and not true. Would you like the definition of unnatural? I'm not fighting with anyone anymore here. I've said what I feel and if you wanna call me judgemental because of it then you better perfect, otherwise you're a hypocrite. IP: Logged |
FireMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1610
From: Minnesota
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted April 04, 2014 06:13 PM
I think some of it does have to do with location... I mean no offense but Iowa is still the Midwest and I know what it's like, there's a church and a Walmart every 2 blocksI admire your patience Sibyl but don't even bother lol IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 3557
From: Pluto with DeepFreeze
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 06:16 PM
quote:
Originally posted by FireMoon:
I think some of it does have to do with location... I mean no offense but Iowa is still the Midwest and I know what it's like, there's a church and a Walmart every 2 blocksI admire your patience Sibyl but don't even bother lol
I'm not from Iowa, I'm from the Eastern part of the country. Many feel the same as do I, and many that agree with you. It's not about location. Why do you have to try digging personally here? IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Moderator Posts: 4243
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted April 04, 2014 06:16 PM
quote:
Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
I'm not telling gays not to have rights, but it doesn't mean that I have to accept it as "normal behavior" either.
I love my cousin and don't discriminate in the context of not taking to him or treating him equal, but I STILL don't have to accept it as "normal behavior" or say it's not a choice, etc. Everyone is jumping to conclusions about us and it's rather funny to be labeled judgmental when is equally being tossed right back.
So you believe gays should not be prohibited from getting married?
IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
Knowflake Posts: 1510
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 04, 2014 06:16 PM
quote:
Originally posted by FireMoon:
I think some of it does have to do with location... I mean no offense but Iowa is still the Midwest and I know what it's like, there's a church and a Walmart every 2 blocksI admire your patience Sibyl but don't even bother lol
They were also the 2nd state to legalize gay marriage so don't tell ME about where I live.
IP: Logged |
FireMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1610
From: Minnesota
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted April 04, 2014 06:22 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
I'm not from Iowa, I'm from the Eastern part of the country. Many feel the same as do I, and many that agree with you. It's not about location. Why do you have to try digging personally here?
Well you live in Iowa now right? And it's nothing personal it's just not my cup of tea, I can't even imagine moving to the Midwest by choice...
Why don't you try putting your personal feelings and defensiveness aside and stick to the issue? Location is an objective factor so that's why I brought it up
IP: Logged |
FireMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1610
From: Minnesota
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted April 04, 2014 06:23 PM
quote:
Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
They were also the 2nd state to legalize gay marriage so don't tell ME about where I live.
It's legal in MN too, but that doesn't change the fact that churches are big business here right along with Walmart IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 8275
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted April 04, 2014 06:25 PM
There was a time the government believed people shouldn't be allowed their rights based on religion, gender, ethnicity. We are slowly moving away from that thinking.IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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