The closet - Lindaland

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Author	Topic: The closet
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 16, 2014 11:41 AM If you realized you belonged to a sexual minority, would you stay in the closet or not? Why? I dedictate this thread to Pixie ------------------ I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged
12muddy Knowflake Posts: 2193 From: Registered: Feb 2013	posted April 16, 2014 12:12 PM It would depend on the environment n circumstances. I've read about how people were murdered after coming out. Gah if I were in a similar situation I'd stay in the closet. Well... living like that would be torturous though. IP: Logged
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 62701 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010	posted April 16, 2014 12:16 PM Depends. I don't tell everyone I am an astrologer if I know I am going to get grief. Why bother lol ------------------ Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/ IP: Logged
Kerosene unregistered	posted April 16, 2014 12:43 PM No because if I want to hold a mans hand ill do it whenever and whereever But I never lived in bum **** Egypt so I never got a negative reaction. and I wouldn't live there either sooo.. No Even in school people were very casual about it because to I went to a prep school with more cultured students. Their mommies and daddies support those damned homosexual artists and designers that make their world a beautiful place lol People were more racist than homophobic but that's another story. IP: Logged
libraschoice77 Knowflake Posts: 1740 From: A Danielle Steele Novel Registered: Aug 2010	posted April 16, 2014 12:56 PM I would stay in for awhile but would have to come out for good because keeping it inside would torment me. Even if I knew harm might come, at least I would have that sense of relief within me. IP: Logged
StarlightSmileSupreme Knowflake Posts: 9079 From: neptune Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 16, 2014 01:28 PM Knowing me I wouldn't bother mentioning it unless I was with other gays and it's not because I am "stuck in a closet." More like, I don't discuss my personal business being a twelfth house person. I just don't do it. I got better things to do than to go into intimate details of my life and how I live it. There are more important things to do with my time than to sit there justifying myself to all and sundry and to talk about very personal matters. I am a firm believer in being true to who you are, not be a gay pretending to be straight or vice versa so if I were gay I would get with others like me, not go off with some straight person without telling them I am gay like some people. I am not deceptive in that way. I just don't feel the need to constantly talk about my personal life with everyone on earth. IP: Logged
YoursTrulyAlways Knowflake Posts: 7050 From: Registered: Oct 2011	posted April 16, 2014 01:56 PM They'll be the first to get laid off where I work. There are laws protecting them, but companies can find any number of excuses and loopholes they want. I know businesses who would go all out to marginalize and destroy their careers. As mentioned, it is still outlawed in a number of countries. I wouldn't know. IP: Logged
Odette Moderator Posts: 5542 From: Registered: May 2012	posted April 16, 2014 05:45 PM Well as you know I'm demisexual. And I will definitely stay in the closet as I have so far. My reason is that as soon as people hear or read about it, they have the reaction that it doesn't exist and that it's similar to sl*t shaming and being religious. They don't get the concept that there is NO desire to have sex.. and that the person is turned on by the connection itself, not the other's physical body. It's next to impossible to explain this. I have Mars conj Neptune anyway and Im pretty secretive and have no desire to be open about my sexuality. No one in my life knows about it. I like to pretend that I'm very promiscuous with men, so that I see what their reaction is... so I can weed out the sexist, the religious etc. I would prefer everyone to think I was promiscuous, because even though I have no desire for that - I am very open minded and I don't want to be portrayed as anything less than that. If it somehow got out that I'm demisexual.. I wouldn't be upset about it.. but I would feel like - Crap!!! Imagine all the time and energy I have to spend constantly explaining myself - now! IP: Logged
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 16, 2014 05:59 PM I feel you Odette. ------------------ I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged
aquaguy91 Moderator Posts: 11265 From: Wankety Wankerson Registered: Jan 2012	posted April 16, 2014 07:40 PM quote: Originally posted by Odette: Well as you know I'm demisexual. And I will definitely stay in the closet as I have so far. My reason is that as soon as people hear or read about it, they have the reaction that it doesn't exist and that it's similar to slt shaming and being religious. They don't get the concept that there is NO desire to have sex.. and that the person is turned on by the connection itself, not the other's physical body. It's next to impossible to explain this. I have Mars conj Neptune anyway and Im pretty secretive and have no desire to be open about my sexuality. No one in my life knows about it. I like to pretend that I'm very promiscuous with men, so that I see what their reaction is... so I can weed out the sexist, the religious etc. I would prefer everyone to think I was promiscuous, because even though I have no desire for that - I am very open minded and I don't want to be portrayed as anything less than that. If it somehow got out that I'm demisexual.. I wouldn't be upset about it.. but I would feel like - Crap!!! Imagine all the time and energy I have to spend constantly explaining myself - now!* Odette,sex is natural. Apes dont worry about connections,they just f*ck! IP: Logged
Odette Moderator Posts: 5542 From: Registered: May 2012	posted April 16, 2014 08:27 PM hahaha Yes. You sound just like me. claps But I don't "worry about" connections and I am happy to just fck when I have an impulse/desire to fck It's just that the impulse is entirely lacking unless I'm turned on - and my being turned on or not ... is not connected to physical appearance (or other "outer" characteristics). Different people have different turn ons. We are more psychologically complex than the other apes... although I'm pretty sure I've read about dolphins, for instance, having sexual preferences. I haven't researched apes enough to know just how complex their sexuality is, and whether it would be possible to find an asexual or demisexual ape. I wouldn't rule out the possibility though, since apes do form bonds, friendships and have a social structure. Demisexuality in my case, could be simply explained as having different "turn ons" to a person who is "sexual". You might be turned on by nice breasts for example, whilst I would be turned on by a particular scenario with a person I have a close emotional connection with. Bodies are just bodies to me. I'm very disconnected from the idea of being turned on by someone's body... although I can definitely physically spoil someone (who I am already attracted to for other reasons) IP: Logged
Odette Moderator Posts: 5542 From: Registered: May 2012	posted April 16, 2014 08:28 PM Cappy IP: Logged
aquaguy91 Moderator Posts: 11265 From: Wankety Wankerson Registered: Jan 2012	posted April 16, 2014 08:33 PM Haha I was just playing with you odette IP: Logged
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 62701 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010	posted April 16, 2014 08:36 PM Odette If you are attracted to a guy in a deeply connected way, are you physically attracted, too? ------------------ Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/ IP: Logged
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 17, 2014 07:47 AM I'm in the closet too (in rl) and I want to stay here as long as possible. Why? I don't feel like dealing with the crap that could follow my confession and I'd rather simply keep it to myself. It would also suck to be dissapointed with a close friend if they didn't understand which is very likely. Currently I don't have to lie about being inexperienced (those who know don't know what I've realized lately though) but when I relocate I will have to start sooner or later. It's gonna be tiresome and sad but gotta protect myself, right? ------------------ I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged
YoursTrulyAlways Knowflake Posts: 7050 From: Registered: Oct 2011	posted April 17, 2014 08:43 AM As though nobody could tell that you swing the other way... The "mother is a homophobe" thread sealed it for me. IP: Logged
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 17, 2014 08:44 AM I'm not a lesbian, silly I'm on the asexual spectrum. Which is ever harder for people to comprehend. IP: Logged
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 17, 2014 09:02 AM ------------------ I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 17, 2014 11:25 AM On the other hand...Coming out to my immediate family could be hilarious. I suspect my mother and sister to be asexual/sex-repulsed/sex-repressed. If they admitted it too I believe my father could get a heart attack And we'd be like ------------------ I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged
StarlightSmileSupreme Knowflake Posts: 9079 From: neptune Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 17, 2014 11:56 AM I notice people who abstain get the most flack of all, to the point of saying there is something wrong with us just for being abstinent. We must have an imbalance of some kind or be miserable. Same stuff they used to say about gays and bisexuals. People always want to find fault with everything. It seems like they aren't happy unless something is "wrong." IP: Logged
PixieJane Moderator Posts: 6451 From: CA Registered: Oct 2010	posted April 17, 2014 12:07 PM ^^ I haven't noticed that. Generally speaking guys aren't supposed to abstain, that probably means they're gay, or eunuchs, or just losers. Females tend to get more leeway, but unless they take religious vows then they are expected to eventually marry and have kids, or something is terribly wrong with her. (And after awhile even guys get hit with the "you have to get married and give me grand kids" or some such, but there's also a Bible verse that pretty much says a woman will be saved through child birth and at least a few take it very serious, including an infertile woman I know of scared she was going to hell...) Of course it varies depending on which specific clique or crowd you run with and the hypocrisy is thick enough to cut with a knife. I believe the reason some make such a big deal about the sex lives of others is to feel better about what's done in private by the one making a big deal over what others are doing. And btw, just to be clear there's a difference between celibate and asexual. People, especially women, can generally get away with being celibate but not saying they're asexual. Of course some families would prefer asexual to homosexual, or vice versa, but in all cases I can see why some would just stay in the closet about it. Both types of sexuality can be treated as disorders by certain unenlightened people. IP: Logged
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 17, 2014 12:23 PM quote: including an infertile woman I know of scared she was going to hell... WTF? ------------------ I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged
PixieJane Moderator Posts: 6451 From: CA Registered: Oct 2010	posted April 17, 2014 12:27 PM She took the Bible as the literal word of God. It said by childbirth she'd be saved. She couldn't have babies and therefore felt she couldn't be saved. IP: Logged
I'm so cappy Knowflake Posts: 9778 From: Death Star Registered: Nov 2012	posted April 17, 2014 12:32 PM Poor woman. ------------------ I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged
Odette Moderator Posts: 5542 From: Registered: May 2012	posted May 28, 2015 01:48 AM bump! IP: Logged

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