posted April 24, 2015 09:53 PM            

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posted April 24, 2015 10:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:
Do you have a little aqua inside you?

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^ That's naughty AG!

*Holds back on taboo.. "oh no she didn't"-style... comment*

posted April 24, 2015 10:08 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
^ That's naughty AG!

*Holds back on taboo.. "oh no she didn't"-style... comment*

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posted April 24, 2015 10:09 PM            

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posted April 24, 2015 10:10 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:

Ami, I'll tell you what I think... but -first- tell me *one* thing that you can't stand about me! Something that just annoys you...
I won't get offended. Be honest!

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posted April 24, 2015 10:10 PM            

I think YOU make rules for when it is right to be emotional and when it is right to be rational and you think they are everyone's rules when they are just YOURS.

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posted April 24, 2015 10:12 PM            

quote:

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I can't put it into words. Why?

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Because I feel like that is your problem!
I think you have repressed your feelings (mainly negative feelings) for a long time. It often seems that way, and you told me that growing up you were always expected to be "on your best behaviour".

posted April 24, 2015 10:16 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Ok this goes way back though

I think YOU make rules for when it is right to be emotional and when it is right to be rational and you think they are everyone's rules when they are just YOURS.

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Ok ^^ This is good!!!

It's not about me personally... But it's good to put it into words and express both positive and negative feelings - not only positive ones.

posted April 24, 2015 10:17 PM            

I think by even having the courage to ask the question, I got some more answers, too.

I appreciate your being so willing to help.

Are you saying I see things as all good or all bad?

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posted April 24, 2015 10:22 PM            

quote:

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Are you saying I see things as all good or all bad?

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Ummmm It's more like you see good and bad as disconnected... when they are actually intertwined imo
I perceive them as intertwined.

I think you suppress anything you see as bad... and generally don't express negative feelings.

posted April 24, 2015 10:22 PM            

Evan Hunter wrote about evil in everyday life. I read all of his books.

The last movie I saw before I went numb was Last Summer by him

It was one of my fave books, too.

It was about how these kids turned evil on a girl who was too weak to stand up.

I vowed I would never be weak but then I went numb and couldn't figure anything out lol

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posted April 24, 2015 10:47 PM            

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posted April 25, 2015 01:02 AM            

Has either of you (Ami, Odette), considered Nietzsche's theories on morality and human consciousness? (Hmmm, wonder if he had some jupiter/Pluto stuff going on) I'm sure you are both familiar with his philosophies. I think Odette would relate to it, and it could give Ami some perspective. He didn't really believe in good or bad but thought of these things, or ways of understanding our lives as byproducts of our very juvenile stage of evolutionary consciousness. We categorize certain experiences as good/evil, pain/pleasure because of our physiological, psychological, and emotional responses. Nietzsche didn't believe these categories were rational at all, or that humans could even be rational. He basically postulated that we are slaves to our base instincts. No excuses! In my limited experience, this is what I've come to recognize, so why do we torture, judge, and criticize ourselves and others for behaving in ways that we cannot always help. WHY?!

Ami, give yourself a break. True humility and the foundation of strong character comes from embracing your flaws, your so called evils, from looking at yourself in your most disgusting state, and loving and forgiving what you see. (Now, I am talking in a certain range of what we call normal behavior here) This thinking:

"You're a b*stard, I'm a b*stard, aren't we just the most ridiculous bunch? "

Is liberating.

Sometimes, I have to remind my friends and family that only sinners go to church. What I mean when I say that is sometimes, we get so caught up in trying to be moral, righteous, and pure that we forget that we just aren't. Yet, we are sooo unbelievably judgmental. Let me give you an example... I was recently asked if I was jealous over a relationship my bestie was having with someone else. It's complicated, (it was my husband) I don't think I was, but when I went home and thought about it... Even in the safety and comfort of my private thoughts, I was so unwilling to entertain the idea. I realized that I am so incredibly judgmental that I wasn't even willing to afford myself the very natural and possibly constructive instinct to be jealous (as aquaguy was trynna point out). This is where problems occur. We cannot deny these parts of who we are. It will get us nowhere. Emotions, negative (so called) or positive drive almost everything we do including how we think. It's best to keep in touch and be honest.

Pain is part of an orienting process where our lowest lows becomes new points of reference for higher joys and deeper appreciation. Don't deprive yourself.

posted April 25, 2015 04:30 AM            

quote:

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We cannot deny these parts of who we are. It will get us nowhere. Emotions, negative (so called) or positive drive almost everything we do including how we think. It's best to keep in touch and be honest.

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That's completely true

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Teasel

quote:

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Calm, rational me knows that most people act out of insecurity, and it isn't really me that is the problem - but I expect them to understand the same about me, and they don't. I'm supposed to do better, be better, and I'm tired of it.

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posted April 25, 2015 07:26 AM            

SP is supposed to be a place where one can really share from one's heart and have it be safe.

Thanks so much for responding and I will study and get back.

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posted April 25, 2015 07:33 AM            

That is what I have always admired about Odette.

She seems to be able to face what is and still be sweet and warm.

It may be the Cappy Moon, in part.

She has a Pisces Mercury which is sweet and idealistic. She has an Aries Sun, which is fire.

However, on a larger scale, I used to be very smart in an emotionally smart way.

I have Sun and Mercury sextile Pluto and I used to be Scorpio Sun like.

I could see through a person or situation with clear vision. Now, I am afraid to look like by my SEEING it, I am bad somehow.

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posted April 25, 2015 04:02 PM            

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