posted January 16, 2014 11:25 PM            

yah you totally didn't see repression. you must have been blind.

" Olivier was, however, from the beginning not happy in his first marriage. Repressed, as he came to see it, by his religious upbringing, Olivier recounted in his autobiography the disappointments of his wedding night, culminating in his failure to perform sexually.

Thank you for the dictionary meaning. You probably need it. Of course it's psychological repression here. It can come from himself, it can come from expectations projected to him. Priaspus on his dsc makes him repressed from women.

posted January 16, 2014 11:33 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
Diego Rivera's BML still in 7th house.
Laurence Oliver's Priapus still near DSC

yah you totally didn't see repression. you must have been blind.

" Olivier was, however, from the beginning not happy in his first marriage. Repressed, as he came to see it, by his religious upbringing, Olivier recounted in his autobiography the disappointments of his wedding night, culminating in his failure to perform sexually.

Thank you for the dictionary meaning. You probably need it. Of course it's psychological repression here. It can come from himself, it can come from expectations projected to him. Priaspus on his dsc makes him repressed from women.

If you even bother to go through wiki, there's talk that he got together with men. Yes...compensation indeed. He seeked it from the opposite gender.

---

Pretty sure our eyes saw big block o' text and glazed over.

Olivier's 'religious upbringing repression' (to which I have to say, get in line) is hardly represented by PRIAPUS.

posted January 16, 2014 11:40 PM            

Priapus is the tension spot. It gets afflicted when you bruise his male ego as a woman. He returns a response through his Nessus.

You are the Sun-Lilith woman who's clearly all about not giving up. You clash with him. You don't know when to stop. If you stop where to draw the line, his abuse will stop.

posted January 17, 2014 12:03 AM              

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
Diego Rivera's BML still in 7th house.
Laurence Oliver's Priapus still near DSC

yah you totally didn't see repression. you must have been blind.

" Olivier was, however, from the beginning not happy in his first marriage. Repressed, as he came to see it, by his religious upbringing, Olivier recounted in his autobiography the disappointments of his wedding night, culminating in his failure to perform sexually.

Thank you for the dictionary meaning. You probably need it. Of course it's psychological repression here. It can come from himself, it can come from expectations projected to him. Priaspus on his dsc makes him repressed from women.

If you even bother to go through wiki, there's talk that he got together with men. Yes...compensation indeed. He seeked it from the opposite gender.

---

posted January 17, 2014 12:09 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ceridwen:
If you`re resorting to insults to back up your claim, there is no need to continue this discussion.

---

I'm pretty sure she got it confused with something I said. Which I hadn't. She doesn't have it in for you, Ceri. I don't think .... Just me. For ... some reason.

posted January 17, 2014 12:10 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
Priapus is also protector of garden (seeds), God of Fertility.

In a man's chart, Priapus means urge to scatter seeds. Can mean many children (as observed above). but might be from multiple women.

---

I agree. So ... tell me again, how does PRIAPUS, in your opinion, relate to repression?

posted January 17, 2014 12:23 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
ur husband's Sun-Priapus-Nessus

Priapus is the tension spot. It gets afflicted when you bruise his male ego as a woman. He returns a response through his Nessus.

You are the Sun-Lilith woman who's clearly all about not giving up. You clash with him. You don't know when to stop. If you stop where to draw the line, his abuse will stop.

---

I'll buy that he reacts to his feeling affronted (his PRIAPUS not getting his way) with NESSUS. I must argue that I 'don't know when to stop'. I did that. It got worse. If he feels he can railroad me, he loses respect for me - and then it compounds everything.

It's not that I'm all about not giving up, it's that I'm a strong-willed personality who's suffered enough at the hands of OPHELIA-PHILOMELA, that I am much more steely than I once was. I'm also going through a series of 'get a bigger backbone' transits.

So, that's actually very insightful. I wish that all I had to do was let him walk all over me (because it's one or the other - he's a very black-and-white kind of guy) and he'd cherish and adore me - but he only adores - and cherishes - the Lilith aspects of me.

posted January 17, 2014 06:16 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
ur husband's Sun-Priapus-Nessus

Priapus is the tension spot. It gets afflicted when you bruise his male ego as a woman. He returns a response through his Nessus.

You are the Sun-Lilith woman who's clearly all about not giving up. You clash with him. You don't know when to stop. If you stop where to draw the line, his abuse will stop.

---

Please please please realize , there is no right there is no wrong here!
Judgement is the only thing that is wrong, it hurts the most!
What we see here isn't her being mean or wrong to her husband!
This is just the nature of 2 charts coming together and yes it's not always pretty but when a person knows something is wrong and they ask for help, you don't want to critique them! I'm sorry but that's mean!

Instead you applaud them and see they are wanting to rise above the nature of the situation because they are looking to find a new path. She wants to be the bigger person because she realizes what's going on isn't the best or the healthiest for her or her husband!
I'm proud of her!
I've said things on this thread that would be hard for anyone to swallow! I have pointed out things that don't paint her in the most perfect light but it's the truth, not because she wanted it to be that way but because it's just how it is. Her response says so much, she has humbly accepted it and sees where change might be necessary!
That's a powerful soul to see and accept there part in it in something that has went wrong without feeling attacked!
She hasn't defended herself, she's just allows herself to become aware of the nature she shares with her husband as it is seen through their synastry!
She's sees the good and the bad and wants to do her part to change what she can!
That's an enlightened soul wanting to become even better!
I'm sure your the same way, but you guys together are not displaying that good side of yourselves on this thread!

I bet between the 2 of you there is some misunderstandings that can be seen in your synastry!
Maybe some hard aspects between Mercury/ Pluto/ Mars and/ or Sun or Saturn....
We all have bad synastry with someone and our natural behavior isn't the best until we see we are not being who we want to be and search for a new way through a new understanding....that's what she is doing here, on this thread!
She wants a new understanding of why things are the way the are with her husband, so she can change it!
That's something to applaud her for!!
That's growth and working towards becoming a better soul.
I think if you guys looked at your synastry together you would end up laughing because you'd see why you fight instead of understand each other!
Nobody is right , nobody is wrong...everybody is behaving on instinct until they decide to use their head to see a new and better way to work with others!
Astrology shows the way things will play our without any thought, but with thought we can change the way it plays out for the better, doesn't mean it won't be a struggle but still it's worth it!

I think you both are trying to be a positive influence here but the way you go both go about doesn't fit well with the others way of going about it....that's just reality and doesn't mean one is right or wrong, your just different! There isn't anything wrong with being different, but judging someone and thinking they are wrong for being themselves isn't so great!
It's easier to let them be and enjoy that they aren't just like you because then this would be a really boring world!

posted January 17, 2014 09:02 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
I'll buy that he reacts to his feeling affronted (his PRIAPUS not getting his way) with NESSUS. I must argue that I 'don't know when to stop'. I did that. It got worse. If he feels he can railroad me, he loses respect for me - and then it compounds everything.

It's not that I'm all about not giving up, it's that I'm a strong-willed personality who's suffered enough at the hands of OPHELIA-PHILOMELA, that I am much more steely than I once was. I'm also going through a series of 'get a bigger backbone' transits.

So, that's actually very insightful. I wish that all I had to do was let him walk all over me (because it's one or the other - he's a very black-and-white kind of guy) and he'd cherish and adore me - but he only adores - and cherishes - the Lilith aspects of me.

If I'm too nurturing or compromising, it all falls apart. If he doesn't respect me (deep down), he can't love me. No matter how much he outwardly hates it.

---

I am in no way asking you to be totally submissive towards him. You're stuck in this cycle of "abuse" because you keep playing the "victim" (unintentionally) that triggers his Nessus and it becomes an endless cycle.

posted January 17, 2014 09:53 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ceridwen:
Gabby,

you are awesome.

---

I know, right? I was just thinking that. I feel that Linda's spirit is alive and well within you. One of the reasons I gravitated to her to start was her belief in the power of love to solve anything. That no synastry was unworkable, and we're all here for each other in some way. If warms my heart.

posted January 17, 2014 11:20 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gabby:
@IndigoDirae
I'm going to reread this entire thread, there is a commonality here and when we find it, it will help you understand what your dealing with him...there's a lot going on....
Please tell me the signs and houses if his Priapus and Lilith !
Also anything else you think is important!

---

I agree, Gabby. We're all uncovering a lot; and right around the day of the Black Moon - can't be coincidence.

Someone also introduced in another thread the possibility that my DIANA opposite my costar's PRIAPUS may be causing the intimacy deadlock which he and I experience. (Both his and my DIANA are in my 8H; his is conjunct his SATURN in 4H. I believe his PRIAPUS is in his 12H.)

My husband's PRIAPUS-SUN-NESSUS-SATURN is in 10H, conjunct his 11C and parallel - save for NESSUS (very OOB) and PRIAPUS. But SUN-SATURN are parallel his 11C, definitely.

I'd like to retract my PRIAPUS / SATURN repressive statement. I'm not seeing SATURN repress PRIAPUS. It almost gives it a domineering, solidifying push.

His BML is exactly opposite in his 4H - which is not at ALL surprising.

posted January 17, 2014 11:31 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
I am in no way asking you to be totally submissive towards him. You're stuck in this cycle of "abuse" because you keep playing the "victim" (unintentionally) that triggers his Nessus and it becomes an endless cycle.

You may be verbally abused or physically abused by someone. But you can choose not to be mentally abused. You can choose to walk away.

---

I would never do that to my stepdaughter, no matter how unreasonable her father becomes. I've walked away plenty of times. But this is my marriage. I don't just walk away from a marriage. I may have to fight to establish my place, but I've worked very diligently to see that all needs are met. That is NOT easy.

Yes, it's a different way. It's not right for everyone. But as my husband has said recently, we both have the opportunity to give more love to more people who deserve it - especially each other, and ourselves.

posted January 17, 2014 01:58 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
I am in no way asking you to be totally submissive towards him. You're stuck in this cycle of "abuse" because you keep playing the "victim" (unintentionally) that triggers his Nessus and it becomes an endless cycle.

You may be verbally abused or physically abused by someone. But you can choose not to be mentally abused. You can choose to walk away.

---

Only she can choose when shes ready too see it and she is becoming more ready everyday, but in her time!
She can't be ready in your time!
Every word she reads and every person that gently nudges her in the right direction will help her along her path, but we can't force her! And you know what else....what we think is right, might not be what's right for her!

We cannot yank her into a new understanding, understanding is an evolution of slow steps that open your ability to see something in a new light.

No one can expect someone to see something in a time frame that isn't right for that person, individually.

Even when others think they see it as plain as day...you can't force another soul to grow at your pace you must support them in their growth at their own pace.
That's the only loving way to be.

If it's stressful or upsetting to you to watch another walk a path that you feel is harming them, then your investing to much energy into someone else and not enough into yourself! Your neglecting yourself!
Don't ignore yourself, let others be who they are and you go do something that makes you feel great and forget about whatever path they are on...instead make your path more fun, make it one that feeds you by investing all that energy back into you!

Give people your 2cents and then keep the other 98 for yourself! If what they do emotionally affects you or stresses you, don't stay there and give more and more to them because eventually you will go broke!

If helping them feeds you and makes you feel good then stay and help because your profiting by being there, if not, move on to a different investment!

I married an abusive man, I stayed a few years until the people around me pretty much forced me out....but I wasn't ready, they were ready!
What happened? I divorced him...then got pregnant by him! Lol
After I had our son, I was finally strong enough to leave...I needed another year with him to learn my lessons and truly stop being attracted to abusive men!
In that year I grew by leaps and bounds and actually undid the warped outlook I had about my own Personal value!
It was the best and strongest year of my life, it was my turn around life changing year!
In that time I was able to emotionally see why his abuse wasn't what I needed anymore.
I needed that year and their "help " almost took that from me! They tried to force me into healing in their time, to heal before I was ready!

If nobody would have pushed me I probably wouldn't have done such an extreme thing as get pregnant by him....they pushed me, so I pushed back!

Unconsciously i knew i needed more time! I forced everyone to leave me alone and allow me to leave when I was ready by that action!
As I look back I see I needed to stay attached to him until I had truly figured out why pain wasn't what I wanted. I still had lessons to learn from him that would eventually make me stronger if I stayed to learn them.
Nobody was allowing my path to be fulfilled so I unconsciously found a way to stay attached to him until I was able to learn these lessons!

So don't push ppl out of something, you don't know the whole story that only their soul knows, you might be hurting them and not even realize it!

Who paid the price for this? My son did!
I have my lil guy, and I'm so happy for him but he doesn't have a dad....and that hurts him and me, if ppl hadn't had pushed me maybe things would be different?

posted January 17, 2014 02:41 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
I agree, Gabby. We're all uncovering a lot; and right around the day of the Black Moon - can't be coincidence.

Someone also introduced in another thread the possibility that my DIANA opposite my costar's PRIAPUS may be causing the intimacy deadlock which he and I experience. (Both his and my DIANA are in my 8H; his is conjunct his SATURN in 4H. I believe his PRIAPUS is in his 12H.)

My husband's PRIAPUS-SUN-NESSUS-SATURN is in 10H, conjunct his 11C and parallel - save for NESSUS (very OOB) and PRIAPUS. But SUN-SATURN are parallel his 11C, definitely.

I'd like to retract my PRIAPUS / SATURN repressive statement. I'm not seeing SATURN repress PRIAPUS. It almost gives it a domineering, solidifying push.

His BML is exactly opposite in his 4H - which is not at ALL surprising.

Signs are GEM and SAG. GEM stellium, SAG BML.

---

I have lucifer conjunct my Saturn and my whole life has been a battle of trying to understand what is light and what is dark, what is good and what is evil, what is God and what isn't!
In my struggle to understand this I've tried to, at times, be both. It's the only way to understand the energy.(thank God logos is also conjunct my Saturn, it ensures my quest to understand Lucifers stays on the side of good because I'm equally trying to understand spirituality, enlightenment and love through God, not any so called, devil! It keeps me seeking to understand love at it's deepest, the love that is beyond this one little life. It's universal love)

He is doing the same! Anything that is conjunct Saturn is going to be a life long struggle to come to understand!

posted January 17, 2014 02:46 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ceridwen:
Gabby,

you are awesome.

---

@Ceri and IndigoDirae

posted January 17, 2014 03:49 PM            

I just wanted to say, right off the bat, that I was so deeply touched by what you'd said a few posts back in response to the pervasive negativity. I know that a lot of my solutions are bandages rather than cures. I haven't had the honest wherewithal to do otherwise until very recently.

When I stop and think about my marriage, I find myself comparing it to the mini-marriage I had with a emotionally predatory psychopath for 4 years. I think he was the one who found me at a point where I felt I had nothing left to give, filled me with hope, and then gutted me on every level.

Why did I stay? That was a question I had to ask myself for several years. Comparatively, my husband was the knight in shining armour. Really. It took me this long to return to my core of never needing a knight to begin with!

But, frankly, that made me rather sad.

I'd see my girlfriends go through the madness of l'amour, and feel a strange personal sadness. I'd be so happy when they were secure in love, and enjoying a wonderful relationship. And I'd quietly think, wonder, what that must be like. But then I'd remind myself I was safer in my independence. As my costar described of his same ability to disconnect emotionally, '[they] can't get me here,' 'here' being the state of emotional numbness with which I myself was so familiar for so, so long.

My husband, on the other hand, is very upfront about everything. I admired his tendency to broadcast rather than be secretive. His no-holds-barred sexuality, whereas I couldn't even permit myself to be - or even be - sexual.

Trouble is, it was too much of a lie. I was trying to be something I'm not - whether that's submissive, or a total dominatrix - because no man had ever really allowed me to just be a woman!

Until my costar.

Suddenly, I didn't have to pretend. I wasn't requested to read a script. There didn't need to be a plan. Neither of us expected the other to fit some preconceived idea. We just ... were. Making it up as we went along.

If only we could acknowledge it all the next day. But when he returns to his sex-negative, repressive environment, he becomes the frigid sexual anorexic once more. Only I know what he's capable of - something he keeps so tightly under wraps. And ... even then ... SO repressed.

Whereas my husband lives out loud. It's grown to where it's a bit intimidating, but if we wanted the same things, it would be so exciting!

But I don't want to be a dominatrix just to be sexual anymore. I'm SO much more than that. I know that now!

I started distancing from those emotionally abusive relationships in my life last year. Hardest was with my Twinflame - but I did it.

This is my husband. I can't just do that.

We have things to work through. Things we must do together. Things we both need to do. And I THINK, I would certainly LIKE to be together for the journey, no matter what.

He goes back and forth on that. At times, I feel the genuine love - or desire for it. I'll feel his pain; we're very close on many levels - he's a dear and long-standing companion soul - even though he doesn't believe in, well, anything. I'll feel when he wishes he were different. I'll feel the times that he's in the stranglehold of the addiction, and I only wish he'd react lovingly instead of brutish and bullying.

Deep down, I'll feel his desire to change - to have a different life. That he blames himself for our dysfunction and unhappiness. But he only expresses what I do wrong, and how his needs are never met, and, if he meets my needs at all, he needs to know what he'll get out of it.

I know - I KNOW. It sounds horrible. It is - sometimes. But that's a sliver of years.

I've gotten very close to leaving recently. Closer than ever. But there are several issues with that.

One, my stepdaughter. She needs me. I can't leave.

Two, my costar loves the family he has in us. If I left, we'd have to end our relationship on principle. He refuses to ever be the cause of a marital disintegration - and I don't blame him. I'd need to give him a wide berth, which would be VERY difficult - professionally-speaking, and, personally, it would be extremely hard for both of us to take - having to lose each other. And like that. After SO much work the past few years.

Three, despite the bizarre circumstances under which I married (no pregnancy involved, just odd, poorly chosen, overly pragmatic reasons) I dedicated myself to it, and to my new family. I don't just walk away from that.

So, it's complicated.

I'm surprised I looked right at my mother yesterday and said, 'I can't believe I'm honestly beginning to consider whether we should just separate, because I don't know what we're doing this for - what I'M doing this for.'

She doesn't blame me. She's pretty damned angry with him right now, but both my parents are trying to keep my family together.

It's kind of a mess. I do the best I can.

I married an addict. I just didn't realise it until it was too late. I regret that. I'd've planned better. I'd've NEVER done certain things.

posted January 17, 2014 04:58 PM            

Allow yourself to see the journey as the destination and then allow yourself to be surprised at where your journey takes you!
When you let go and let your higher self lead, you will start enjoying the places your taken!
Don't judge just flow with your decisions, and if you want to change your mind because you don't like a decision you made, you can!
Don't expect yourself to all have the answers because we never have all the answers, we never will! Be ok with that!
Don't think you can only make or act on a decision if it's the perfect right decision....or else you will never act on your decisions because you will fear it's not the right decision!

Let yourself make mistakes, be stupid and mess up because that's the only way you will learn...don't expect perfection or even good decisions for awhile...because you won't make them until you've purged your fear of not knowing what to do....and stopped allowing that fear to be what motivates you not to make a move , instead of confidence in yourself and love motivating you to make a move.
Your doing a perfect job!
We aren't supposed to be the so called 'perfect' that everyone thinks we are striving for, that perfect doesn't exist.
We are supposed to be growing through learning....that is our perfection.
As long as your moving forward, and backwards at times...
Your doing a perfect job!
Imperfection is standing still and not learning anything because your stagnant and living in fear.....fear of the motion that allows growth. That motion goes back and forth, it's not a straight 'perfect' line!

Mistakes are a sign that your still moving forward...it just doesn't feel like that to us, mistakes are part of our perfect path! That so called 'perfection' that everyone strives for isn't part of the human experience, it's not real or possible, until you realize perfection is accepting mistakes are the path to growth and growth is perfection!
Make mistakes, laugh at yourself and learn from it and your doing exactly what your supposed to do!

posted January 18, 2014 09:46 AM            

Thank you so much for taking a moment to share all of what you're going through here. Wow. I am definitely right there with you, and my heart goes out to you - that's not just a platitude. (And I'll be more than happy to respond to the other thread. I hadn't even seen it - you're right! It's been so crazy here.)

Much more to follow when it's not as hectic. What a start to the year!

posted January 18, 2014 10:34 AM            

He married a "Lilith" woman. Not the evil kind, but one who wanted to be equal. She is his equal. She gets a lot of attention but doesn't overshadow him (unlike Princess D with Prince Charles).

Kate middleton's Priapus (29 Gem) conjunct his Priapus (0 Can)

posted January 18, 2014 12:10 PM            

Marilyn Moore
lilith rising
Priapus conjunct DSC

Her Priapus conjunct JF Kennedy's Juno

"Monroe reportedly became convinced she would be Kennedy’s second wife and told friends: “Can’t you just see me as first lady?”"
" Monroe was in love with President Kennedy and wanted to marry him; she called the White House frequently in 1962; and that, when the married president ended their affair, Monroe became even more depressed, and turned to Robert Kennedy, who reportedly visited Monroe in Los Angeles the day that she died"