posted April 29, 2022 09:30 PM            

Good topic for sure!😎

I am going to ponder on this
some more before replying more
on this subject.

I'd like to read more points of views on this!😎

posted May 02, 2022 09:34 AM            

When Dad died and I could let me guard down, I even cried at his grave, forgiving him everything and wishing him well, and I expect I'll be the same with with Mom...in both cases, I'll probably be the only one who sheds a sincere tear for either of them (the last one alive who would anyway).

I recognize this as unusual. Maybe it's my 12H Cancer? (I have multiple ideas on why this may be so, and was surprised to find out how I felt when I visited my dad's grave.)

x

But that doesn't apply to romance.

And WHO WOULD WANT to get a love card about, "I love you despite everything you are" or "you're worth the misery"? I bet even saying, "I want to marry you despite the sex being the worst of anyone" would make many cold.

I'd think people would rather feel beautiful, valued, appreciated...that is the love is earned rather than wasted on those who can't appreciate it (or worse, exploit it).

I can see using superficial means to attract love, but once the spark is there, I'd think most would want it to grow into something much deeper, leaving the shallows for the deep waters so to speak as they get to know you.

I strongly suspect the "appeal" of "unconditional love" (which typically is not truly unconditional) is because of the damaging lie of the romantic age, Disney love and all that where love must be constant bliss and perfection or something is wrong, even that someone is "settling." They want the security and comfort (the condition of the unconditional) of love without worrying that one could ever be replaced or that one could be left, or feel the need to leave due to social pressures. ('Course a pattern of abuse can complicate this further.)

Since conflicts, bad moods, and stress are inevitable, sexual desires aren't always (or even often) going to coincide or be exact, that would of course not only be impossible to maintain 24/7, but nerve wracking, so they hope for the more realistic view that those who love each other stick by each other even during hard times and when upset with each other, but as they think that's not true love (since it should be bliss) they call it "unconditional" so that they can promote what they think they're supposed to promote without having to worry about being dumped (or feeling obligated to dump) the moment reality hits them over the head.

posted May 04, 2022 09:12 AM            

Is there a reason for that? It seems like such a non sequitur.

posted May 04, 2022 12:53 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Eternal Energy:
Yes, it was intended for another setting.

For another thread.

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posted May 04, 2022 12:56 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
^^

Is there a reason for that? It seems like such a non sequitur.

I am familiar with Kant, and the work above doesn't seem applicable to notions of unconditional love (with conditions) in romance specifically (as opposed to agape, the love for all, including strangers, which is different from romantic love). So I can't help but wonder why you posted it in this thread, to the point that I wonder if you actually meant to post it in another thread instead of this one.

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