posted July 31, 2023 02:41 PM            

i broke it off yet i’m the one crying over being too godd*mn wise

just drinking instead of being romantically stupid
http://youtu.be/h8bAbvk5Hs4

need a single day to feel terrible. self-inflicted dissapointmrnt is better than rude awakening

i’m not allowed to cause anyone sorrow (Saturn Atmakaraka)

posted July 31, 2023 03:08 PM            

26.06.2023
the day i decided to give him my number
26.06.2023
he texted me that night

04.07.2023
we went out together for the first time, after writing back and forth

30.07.2023
told him we put this relationship on pause until he figures out the situation with his ex

23.08.2023
while his ex was in town, told him i’m gone if he doesn’t make a clear decision. cannot continue in the limbo

01.09.2023 (the full moon the day before this exactly on his DC)
a week after ex left. broke no contact to reach out with a prayer and well-wishes. to my surprise he responded immediately with a letter of love

—

posted August 01, 2023 01:40 PM            

Hex 36;2
http://www.yijing.nl/origins/36-2-KingMu.htm

Line-2

Legge: The second line, magnetic, shows its subject with clouded perception and wounded in the left thigh. She saves herself by the strength of a swift horse, and is fortunate.

Wilhelm/Baynes: Darkening of the light injures him in the left thigh. He gives aid with the strength of a horse. Good fortune. [Here the Lord of Light is in a subordinate place and is wounded by the Lord of Darkness. But the injury is not fatal; it is only a hindrance. Rescue is still possible.]

Confucius/Legge: Her good fortune is due to the proper fashion of her acting according to her circumstances.

Wilhelm/Baynes: The good fortune comes from [the line's] devotion to the rule.

Blofeld: This good fortune results from compliance with laws and regulations. [The implication would seem to be that, when charged with emergency duties, we must persist in carrying them out at all costs.]

Cleary (2): The luck of the second yin is in model obedience.

Wu: Abiding by the principle.

Legge: Line two is magnetic, but in her proper and central place, giving us the idea of an officer, obedient to duty and the right. Her wound in the left thigh may impede her movements, but it does not disable her. She finds the means to save herself and maintain her good purpose. The "proper fashion of acting" is suggested by the magnetic line being the central place.

NOTES AND PARAPHRASES

Siu: The man is injured but is not disabled. He recovers and pursues his good purpose with the strength of a horse.

Wing: Rather than disabling you, a recent injury that you have sustained on your path will serve to inspire you toward affirmative and vigorous action in the direction of the general good.

Editor: The thigh is a walking muscle, giving us the power to move or act. The left is a universal symbol of the unconscious psyche and its functions. The left thigh, then, is an image of unconscious motive power, or natural motivation. To be "wounded in the left thigh" suggests an impeded natural response, as opposed to a conscious, willed response. (When associated with the idea of Clouded Perception, this may refer to a failure of insight or intuition.) A horse represents energy in general; here it may be psychic energy relating to perception -- "horse- sense," if you will. One is reminded of the centaur Chiron, the “wounded healer” of Greek myth, who was also wounded in the thigh. In astrology, Chiron symbolizes unhealable wounds, and although it may be stretching the symbolism here, dealing with such wounds is a natural part of the Work: they may be unhealable, but they must be dealt with nonetheless. In the words of an old Blues lyric: “I may get better, but I won’t get well.”

Fusion, inner unity, is obtained by means of "friction," by the struggle between "yes" and "no" in man. If a man lives without inner struggle, if everything happens to him without opposition, if he goes wherever he is drawn or wherever the wind blows, he will remain such as he is. But if a struggle begins in him, and particularly if there is a definite line in this struggle, then, gradually, permanent traits begin to form themselves, he begins to "crystallize."
Gurdjieff

Hexagram 44.5

posted August 05, 2023 05:29 AM            

Diversity.

The hexagram describes a time when differences are accentuated and things tend to separate out. It also relates to that which is unfamiliar and the experience of diversity.

This is not an easy time. It is more difficult to relate to those who are different from ourselves than to those who are like us and adjusting to the unfamiliar can be uncomfortable. The situation can be made even more challenging when those we are encountering are emphasising their differences, even amongst themselves.

The hexagram means separation and loneliness.

It is necessary to remember that we all share a spiritual connection so there is a possibility of harmony between us. The most indirect of connections can be built on to negotiate cooperation using tact and compromise.

There is also a wealth to be found in diversity. By expanding our horizons to accept those who are different from ourselves we reap the reward of a wider experience.

Rejecting difference leads to isolation. Contrasts stand out more than similarities and can easily be exaggerated into xenophobia.

Suggested Responses:

It is likely that you are lonely, or are experiencing a larger degree of diversity than you are comfortable with.

Although it may be difficult, greater benefit is to be had by accommodating differences rather than by rejecting them.

When differences show up in personal relationships, we have the choice of accentuating the differences, which would likely lead to isolation and hostility, or looking for compromise and appreciating the diversity that is acceptable.

A time of separation need not prevent one from embarking on enterprise. This may even be a good time to venture out. But understand that things will not be easy and that effort will be needed to accommodate the many differences that will arise.

Line 5

Accepting of difference.
Diversity is intensely rewarding.

Line 5

A moving line in the fifth position counsels that one may be failing to recognize another who is simpatico. Such a person may be hidden because of stressful conditions. Over time, the other reveals an inner affinity, and then it is one’s duty to reach out.

Line 5:

posted August 31, 2023 04:26 PM            

my mind goes looking for answers and comes up with awful stuff

posted September 02, 2023 09:56 AM            

hex 55;2.3.5

what has he decided about us? [after the ex’s visit to move her furniture out of the apartment]

hex 40;1.4

1.—Siu: At the outset, the man is freed from obstacles and is recuperating in peace. Wing: You have surmounted the difficulties in your current endeavor. The path has been cleared and progress will continue. Use this time to consolidate your position.

posted September 06, 2023 02:29 AM            

hex 17;6
Image: Following

Understanding, then choosing to follow.

The meaning of an influence becomes clear. Its message is understood and arouses sympathy. One may now choose to follow the influence and respond to it.

The hexagram has meaning for the development of sexual relation. Desire has been awakened and one now willingly embarks on the pursuit of love, or one is inclined to take interest in the overtures of a suitor. Inexperience may be accompanied by shyness and awkwardness, but also by intrigue and fascination. The hexagram means falling in love.

.6 - The leader appreciates the follower following.
Or, Requited love.

Line-6

Legge: The sixth line, magnetic, shows us that sincerity held and clung to, yea, and bound fast. We see the king with it presenting his offerings on the Western Mountain.

Wing: You are called upon, by virtue of your wisdom and expertise, to lead another. You will unquestionably become involved, but you will be rewarded for your unselfish commitment.

“The surrender of the limited purposes of the ego to the much larger goals of the Self -- goals within which the lesser egoic purposes are in fact meaningfully encompassed -- does not do away with the sense of freedom. On the contrary, only by subordinating the limitations of the ego to the Self do we truly justify our freedom and do we meaningfully validate our responsibility for our actions and decisions.”
S.A. Hoeller -- The Gnostic Jung

posted September 07, 2023 03:43 AM            

moments later, i heard in my head, his voice say, making an honest man out of me

posted September 22, 2023 03:24 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by vansio:
26.06.2023
the day i decided to give him my number
26.06.2023
he texted me that night

August 17 & September 21: Venus to degree of June 26

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sept 21. ended things with him

posted November 27, 2023 06:55 AM            

quote:

---

‘King Yi marries off the maidens.
The first wife’s sleeves are not as fine as the younger sister’s.
The moon almost full, good fortune.’

---

posted December 02, 2023 06:40 AM            

quote:

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The Creative (Talent)

This is the hexagram of strength, light, clarity, force, feeling, love, purpose and supreme creative energy. If you have drawn this oracle, you are in tune with the will of the universe. The driving force which impels you to carry off your deeds in love and action comes from the source itself. You have special gifts of insight and spiritual enlightenment and feel empowered to give to others your wisdom, perception and clarity of understanding in matters relating to the human condition. You have the force and the power to reach people, to touch them in their inmost hearts. Your natural condition is to be inspired, and you have the power to inspire others, to move them along spiritual paths, to open their eyes, to gently wake them from sleep and confusion.

You are a leader who recognizes the potential for growth not only in terms of individual awareness, but also in terms of cultural and social awareness.

You have a natural facility for understanding the very nature of the way things work, and because the force described by this hexagram derives its power from the forces of love in the universe. you also have the power to sustain your effort in the work of enlightening and helping others. Within the scope of the oracle, there is the possibility for supreme achievement, but only in this kind of work. There is no room for the superficial, the superfluous, the unnecessary, the mediocre.

This is the oracle of the wise person who knows that his or her life must give expression to the laws of the universe. In The Book of Changes, there is no hexagram which represents more strongly the supreme power for constant and persevering self-renewal, leadership, and the creative expression of love in action. These are not passing qualities in your nature, they are fundamental to it. You intuitively apprehend the forces of good and evil operating in the world, and the necessary interplay between the negative and positive forces which create the tensions of dynamic activity.

You display an untiring energy and devotion which springs from the heart, and you have the all-important ability to devote yourself to specific creative actions. The effect you have on others is sublimely positive. You are able to make your presence and influence known in the world in a most beneficial and inspiring way. You are relentless in your naturally-born desire to rise to the heights of awareness and love. You sense the power of the universe moving through you, and this lends a nobility of heart to your every endeavour.

THE LINES

One

You are a patient person of great inner worth. Your time is not yet come, but you are undeterred by superficial thoughts and are tranquil, honest and expectant. You need have no fear: for your time will come. Do not waste your energy worrying or fretting. Rely upon your spiritual strength to give you the wisdom to know when your energy is sufficient for you to move forward.

Two

Your qualities are positive, your energy is sufficient, you are talented, and you have a natural, beneficial influence over others which is untainted by any thoughts of personal recognition, gain or approval. You are already recognized by those who share your sense of destiny. You have yet to take your place, but it is inevitable that you will do so.

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