posted February 26, 2014 12:36 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MorpHnStorM:
I just wanted to welcome you here and say that I very much appreciate this post. It's touching. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I find the bold to be true as well. I am def. very sensitive to energy myself.

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posted February 26, 2014 12:49 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Virgo@18.35 in 12th house...

My Dejanira/Asclepius is on your Moon.....

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Wow! Well isn't that interesting! My 12th is Taurus-Gemini and I do have my Sun, Venus, NNode, and Chiron there. So I know what the 12th is like, and I always thought a 12th Moon has got to be one of the hardest placements...My Moon is in my 4th.

posted February 26, 2014 01:09 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Welcome Micole!!

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MorpHnStorM and Gabby, thank you for such warm words. I'm so grateful that I found you all. Truly, I am.

Oh, so much catching up to do to catch pieces of this conversation! I'll try but I'm committed to a book review tonight, so if I'm late, it isn't because I don't care.

I'll be back!

Michelle

posted February 26, 2014 01:12 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Agreed!!! Your a natural Indigo!! What's in your 3rd house??

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Yes. Just - yes.

Please publish this, Indigo. It shines. And the truth in it, that you "knew" at such a young age, astounds me.

(And thank you for your words about my writing.)

Michelle

posted February 26, 2014 01:14 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MorpHnStorM:
Oh yeah, Gabby, you said you have a Virgo Moon too. At what degree is yours? Indigo, didn't you say you have one too? Curious about your degree as well...Mine is @ 14 Virgo.

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Well, I couldn't resist chiming in on this one either before tackling the reviewing thing. My moon is Virgo 22.53.

Interesting. Very interesting...

Michelle

posted February 26, 2014 01:19 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by micole maree:
Well, I couldn't resist chiming in on this one either before tackling the reviewing thing. My moon is Virgo 22.53.

Interesting. Very interesting...

Michelle

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posted February 26, 2014 01:22 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MorpHnStorM:
Wow! Well isn't that interesting! My 12th is Taurus-Gemini and I do have my Sun, Venus, NNode, and Chiron there. So I know what the 12th is like, and I always thought a 12th Moon has got to be one of the hardest placements...My Moon is in my 4th.

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I think anything in 12th is hard!!
I think it's my favorite house now, but grasping it is very personal and I doubt anyone can truly help someone else with a 12th house issue unless they had a planet conjunct...it's just such an individualized and personal house! No 2 are exactly alike!

My moon is unaspected, conjunct Dejanira and Child! Tough placements but I love them, because their mine, they are all I know and they forced me to look deep inside myself and learn to be truly happy!

But honestly...Sun/Venus/NN AND Chiron??? Wow!! Are any closely conjunct to each other? I bet you would be an amazing psychologist!

posted February 26, 2014 01:23 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Delilah423:
Ahh, and there we have at least part of what is troubling me about this thread, and where you and I disagree, Indigo. I mentioned it obliquely (and briefly) I think much earlier when I talked about mundane spirituality.

Putting aside for a moment that I still don't believe in twin flames (except to the extent that we are all part of the one), I don't think there is anything more creative or that can have a greater impact on the earth than truly loving another unconditionally and "taking care of" each other. Indigo, you make it sound like soulmates are somehow "less than." I don't think that's true, and I don't think it takes great art, etc. to have a signficant spiritual purpose.

What do they call it? The butterfly effect?

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Not in the least, Delilah, and I'm glad you spoke up. In fact, if you look at everything in terms of soul-group, we can see how all are interconnected and related. Soulmates are in NO way less than; my own experiences with several soulmates were enough to show to me rather early on that it's part of a much greater whole.

I personally think Twinflames, should the concept be a valid one, are the ones who are in direct-relationship between two Oversouls. I feel their direct relationship has a sort of psychic impact that's different from soulmates, or with a somewhat variable tendency. Twinflames, I feel, are 'programmed', (though, that's not the best word, by far) with a destiny to - yes - achieve unconditional love and share it with - not just another - but many. I feel it should be of such a level or intensity that it cannot be contained in a single unit or family.

But, I will say, for the likelihood that there are those of us who may have been gifted with it, and so blessed, it may have been to show us it CAN be done - even against great obstacles - and would inspire us (on some level) to believe we might find it, too.

But it can't be mere coincidence that those who have identified themselves in this manner, (providing authenticity - and how can you know?) and many more who are simply dedicated to a similar work - are in the arts, sciences, and have a spiritual framework?

It seems part of something greater.

To that end, I feel that soulmates are essential. Crucial. So much that, I'd say, should we use the term Twinflame, so should we say Soulmates. There's a precious energy contained in all, vibrating at times very, very similarly, if not the same. But I do feel the overall purpose may differ.

For example, there's one very important project which I feel is a kind of compendium of my karmic history, so to speak, that I'm presently developing with a very essential Soulmate. A few, in fact. Some who I met through the project I was developing (and am still to some degree) with the man I refer to as 'Fate' - 'to protect either the innocent or very guilty' as he likes to say. 😉

Is one project ultimately more important or greater than the other? I don't really think so. Different, yes. Greater? That depends on its reception. One is clearly being more forward about the concepts it's exploring. The other presents things with a greater subtlety - but the same sense of timelessness. Important, sweeping things. Big stuff.

One's with a Soulmate, the other with someone who's had a greater impact in many ways.

Is the overall impact of what I'm doing any less in one project than the other? I don't think so.

posted February 26, 2014 01:26 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by micole maree:
Well, I couldn't resist chiming in on this one either before tackling the reviewing thing. My moon is Virgo 22.53.

Interesting. Very interesting...

Michelle

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posted February 26, 2014 01:33 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lavender CrystalSwan:
Lol Virgo guy has his Moon at 19° Virgo...

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posted February 26, 2014 01:59 AM            

Re: 12th house. Mine is empty but this house fascinates me.

My ex's Moon, Uranus and Jupiter were all conjunct in MY 12th house. Secrets, lies, betrayal, shock waves of upheaval. When I got back into astrology and found this, I was pretty stunned. And when you add in our grand trine - his Sun trine his Nessus trine my Moon? Well. To me, this points to the abuse.

O-kaayy. Back to the task nudging me impatiently...

Michelle

posted February 26, 2014 02:03 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Hey my moon sits right in between you guys...mine virgo@18.35!!
It's no wonder we get along so well around here!

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(Lavender, I saw your quote as well, but I haven't mastered the multiple-quote thing!)

Oh, this is a crack-up! Really? This many Virgo moons are in the room?

posted February 26, 2014 02:19 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by micole maree:
(I just can't stay away. Obviously.)

Re: 12th house. Mine is empty but this house fascinates me.

My ex's Moon, Uranus and Jupiter were all conjunct in MY 12th house. Secrets, lies, betrayal, shock waves of upheaval. When I got back into astrology and found this, I was pretty stunned. And when you add in our grand trine - his Sun trine his Nessus trine my Moon? Well. To me, this points to the abuse.

O-kaayy. Back to the task nudging me impatiently...

Michelle

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It can show abuse, the trine lightens the energy...possibly painful issues get exposed to be worked out, if the person/ppl are ready..if one is while the other isn't.... that's not good! Nessus is never fun!
12th house is tough, you really have to be emotionally strong, slow n steady and be careful not to overwhelm yourself while dredging up the things you fear seeing!
Again, not fun! I don't like mixing 12th house and Nessus but I married a man with his Nessus exact square my Dejanira in my 12th conjunct my Sun! Oh Boy!
He brought me back to my childhood fears and me mimicked some of my deepest psychological abuse, his was a Gemini Nessus so his abuse was more verbal and mental!
But through him I returned to a place id long blocked out and saw that it was still there creating issues and pain in me! I was able to start the healing of it after I ditched the jerk!

quote:

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Originally posted by micole maree:

Oh, this is a crack-up! Really? This many Virgo moons are in the room?

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I agree, It's kind of unusual to see a lot of virgo mooners!!

posted February 26, 2014 02:45 AM            

I couldn't grab your quote the usual way for some reason, Gabby.

This is a concern of mine in mine and Jace's charts, should he ever awaken.

My Dejanira is conjunct my Sun (in 3rd). His Nessus is conjunct his Sun (unknown).

His Nessus/Sun is trine my Denanira/Sun.

Ick. This actually, to me, looks more karmic than Twin Flame-ish, not that there isn't ever "stuff" to work through with a Twin Flame.

But I don't like it.

posted February 26, 2014 03:55 AM            

"I'll admit that, Michelle. I KNEW it was you, but I kept thinking of tgem, too. It seemed so similar."

tgem and Indigo -

I read nearly the whole of this thread up until roughly page 37, I think?, in one day. I remembered reading a story that seemed pretty close to my own but I couldn't put the correct name to it. So many words, so many stories, too close together - I couldn't remember who said what, when. Or WHERE! (We're at *49* pages now! Wow.)

But as soon as I can, I'm going to seek out your story again, tgem. (Do you remember roughly the page number area where you posted it?)

posted February 26, 2014 05:49 AM            

Indigo,

You spoke of Stardust, Yvaine and Sootiyo and Soomana.

I was just thinking of my chart and recalled I have Sun-Ywain conjunction. Ywain is also called Yvain in the Arthurian tales but now I think it can mean Yvaine. The stories are somewhat the same, about the guy overcoming obstacles of knighthood and eventually reuniting with his love. In Stardust's case, the guy is called Tristan.

In chart, I also have
Sootiyo conjunct DSC (and a cluster of asteroids)
Soomana conjunct Chiron

In synastry,
his Ywain-Chiron conjuncts my Sootiyo-DSC

Yvaine meets Starboy?

Cerdiwen,
Nike is the goddess of victory. Maybe if you show that you fight for him, he'll recognise you as a "Juno". So talk to him.

Or you can wear Nike when you meet him. Ok ignore this.

Lavender,
I found Pocahontas asteroid to denote patching cultural differences in marriage. Maybe you want to take a look at that.

posted February 26, 2014 06:34 AM            

I continued to immerse myself in spiritually-based reading and continued doing past-life regressions using a guided meditation on CD by Brian Weiss. I journalled, and meditated and wondered.

I kept hearing "Trust". "Trust, trust, trust". At the same time, I sensed change barreling towards me and I was scared to death. The "knowing" that my marriage was ending kept intruding. So, in my own way, I "ran".

I redoubled my efforts at reaching out to my husband. I went so far as to spend hours reading reviews about sex-help books (rather like self-help, lol) and purchased several for me (for his increased pleasure) and for him (for my increased pleasure). We were coming up on our twenty-year anniversary and I thought this was a really thoughtful Christmas gift. An investment in our marriage, in us, in connecting to each other. (No pun intended!) I mean, really. Married nearly twenty years, together nearly twenty-four. A little bit of spice is a good thing, right? I think there are an awful lot of men married this long who would think so.

When he opened the gift, he was SO underwhelmed. I could tell he really didn't like it at all. And I felt just sick. Sick to my stomach, sick at heart. That change was still barreling toward me. But I went for it anyway. Over the next couple of months, I put my new-found knowledge to work, focusing on his pleasure. He loved it, of course. But his contribution was limited to things that *I* had come across in my reading and asked him to try with me. When I finally said something to him about him not reading any of the new books as I had been doing, his answer was, "Michelle, when do I have time to read?". I stared at him in disbelief. He was 3/4 of the way through his third 500-page hardback from the library. When I then pointed that out, he just stared back at me. Caught. He had no words. But I no longer needed any. His disinterest, his lie, his silence told me once again how little he valued me or our relationship. The writing was on the wall.

During the next month, synchronicities that had been appearing seemed to bump up in intensity. I was really tuning in to my inner voice and receiving clear impressions via clairaudience, clairvoyance and especially clairsentience (clear feeling), my strongest sense. I was also actively asking for signs. (I know I may be testing the limits of your acceptance with this one, but it came out of my reading Doreen Virtue's books. Since I've opened up my awareness and invited signs, they are literally everywhere. They are simply another means of communication. It all depends upon our own willingness to see and listen.)

I dreamed that I entered an office where my husband worked. (A dream office, not the real one.) He left the office; I knew he wasn't coming back. Jace saw me and invited me into his office, which put my husband's office behind my back. As I entered Jace's office, I noticed the wall of windows behind his desk with an incredible view of the hills here. He then invited me to his "private" terrace through a sliding glass door. He made his way to a bench and invited me to sit beside him. As I did, I looked out over the countryside and it looked hazy and smoky, not clear at all. Then my right contact lens landed on my cheek. As I excused myself to go and deal with my lens, he indicated that he would save my place next to him. Again, I looked at the horizon. It was all haze. And then I awakened.

I knew immediately what the dream meant. My husband left me behind and Jace then invited me through his work world and into his private world. He wanted me beside him. But the horizon, the future, was not clear. It was impossible to see because of the haze. ((How would free will play out in the unfolding future?)) My right (intuitive side) contact lens (ability to see) fell out; I could no longer see clearly and had to leave him so that I could restore my sight. I left him holding my place, looking out at the same cloudy horizon I was now leaving behind me. The future was not clear but I had a task in front of me. I needed to be able to see clearly.

I awakened and knew. And yet questioned. So I asked for a sign. A fairly difficult one for the Universe to meet. We lived on a frontage road and occasionally would hear a big rig pass by on the freeway, honking that heavy-duty horn. This didn't happen often, not even once a month. So I said silently, "Okay, if you're really telling me that Jace is meant for me and I am meant for him, if you're telling me that we're soulmates, let me hear a big rig honk his horn within five minutes." I no sooner finished the request than a big rig honked DIRECTLY across the road and creek from our home. I hadn't even heard the rumble of a big rig approaching out there. It was so absolutely immediate. I lay there in shock, frozen, disbelieving.

The next night I tried again. We would occasionally hear a CHP officer on the bullhorn, pulling over a driver at night. This was even less frequent than the big-rig horn-honking. I waited until the wee hours, when traffic is really light. And I said, "Okay, another sign please. If you ARE telling me that Jace is my soulmate, please let me hear a CHP officer pull over a driver within the next half-hour." Five minutes later, I heard that bullhorn. And about twenty minutes later, I heard it again.

TWICE? TWICE in a half-hour? For the record, between that night and the time I left six months later, I never heard another CHP officer on his bullhorn.

So I started praying. Asking for help to leave. We were still struggling financially and the economy wasn't improving. I didn't see HOW I was going to pull this off. Find the money to leave, find a place for my daughter and I that I could afford, any of it. And I kept hearing "Trust".

Despite the crunched funds, my husband and I decided to take a brief winter vacation, a few days in the snow at Lake Tahoe. We hadn't had a break for a couple of years because of funds and our daughter had never been in the snow; I had been in the snow but had never actually SEEN it snow. We started preparing, borrowing gear from friends and finding a deal on lodging. At work, my husband was asking people for input on places to go, things to do, etc.

Meanwhile, the event where I had been unintentionally rude to Jace at the company event had never stopped haunting me. I had always wanted to apologize. This isn't unusual for me. I tend to go to great lengths to keep my interactions with others as clean as possible. OTHER people think it's weird and I'm weird, but I've always followed the beat of my own drummer on this one regardless of others. [[Please don't take these words to mean that I think I'm better than other people. I don't. This is just something that I've always done, for my own internal peace.]] I kept getting this "picture" of me writing a letter. In the back of my mind, I knew unequivocally that my husband would forbid me to do such a thing, thinking it was his right to do so. That he did this at all with me had always ticked me off but I had fallen into the victim role and agreed to his demands against my better judgment way too often. This one was MINE. My mistake to try to clean up.

So I worked on the letter. It was to the point, honest, me owning my own shyness and self-consciousness and my regret that I had been unintentionally rude out of that self-consciousness. I told him that for me it was a matter of personal integrity that I apologize and ask for forgiveness when I screw up with someone and that this had been on my heart for years. I also said that I knew what I was doing was fairly unusual by most people's standards. I asked for his forgiveness and that he simply allow this matter to rest, that I needed nothing from him. I also asked that if he was offended by my reaching out in this way, that he not let it affect his view of my husband, that this was me acting completely independently of him, for myself and by myself. And I asked for him to keep this matter confidential, telling him that I would inform my husband of this letter myself very shortly.

I prayed and I meditated over this for quite a while and I got a clear "Go" from my intuition. So I mailed the letter. I knew it would arrive sometime the next day.

So the next day, I was all stirred up. Second-guessing myself. What if I had made a mistake? What if my intuition had taken a hike? What if this hurt my husband? I was a mess. Finally, in the early afternoon, I told my daughter I had to go and lie down. I did, praying for some peace. Or the oblivion of sleep!

After lingering in that place between wakefulness and sleep for about an hour or so, all of a sudden I felt this kind of light, sparkling, sprinkly sensation around my heart, which suddenly felt SO open and alive. And I knew. I knew he had just read the letter and that it had touched his heart. I KNEW I was forgiven. And I knew it was all okay. ALL of it.

And then I realized what had just happened. I had just telepathized with Jace. From a distance, over something that was directly related to me. This was a direct connection between he and I.

I was both elated and scared. In awe and so churned up. I truly didn't know what to do with this other than be amazed.

My husband called me an hour later and said that Jace had just sat down at his desk and said, "I know you're not very familiar with this area of Tahoe, so here are some places you might enjoy exploring". He then proceeded to draw out a rough map for my husband. [[His family has a vacation home in the area where we were headed.]] My husband then said to me, "Jace is going to be up there this weekend as well."

(To be continued.) I'd say "evil grin" but I'm actually just plain tired and not intending a cliffhanger here. More later, friends.

***Edited to note this: I really didn't mean to lead you on. No, I didn't run into him while we were in Tahoe.

Michelle

posted February 26, 2014 07:29 AM              

Gave me a weird feeling like something`s up, in the air so to speak.

Funnily, when I got to school today, a colleague approached me and asked if I was interested in another seminar (we were the ones participating in the seminar about satirical writing/ acting in school a few months ago), this time it will be a seminar about "vocal training/ use of the voice in literature/theatre-classes".

I instantly agreed to that, which is strange in itself, I usually never agree immediately to things, but it just felt right and important.

It will push my boundaries again, I know that. Because it will come along with practical exercise, physical ones, too, and I am very reserved when it comes to that. lol

But on the other hand I have the feeling it will be good for me.

The only thing, I saw the date, 31st march. And I kept thinking about that, something feels inside like: "There was something about that date. Something on that date. But I can`t remember what it was." LOL

No clue, why the date just jumped out at me so much.

posted February 26, 2014 07:31 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Agreed!!! Your a natural Indigo!! What's in your 3rd house??

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posted February 26, 2014 07:36 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MorpHnStorM:
This is absolutely true. A romantic "relationship" shouldn't be the ultimate goal either...It can't be stated enough that that is not what this UNION is about, and I will freely admit that this idea/thought process is one that annoys me to no end...

@ Indigo, thanks for sharing more with us, I hope you feel better soon. Rest up!

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posted February 26, 2014 07:38 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MorpHnStorM:
LoL yeah, and it's interesting to find out only last night, just how much interaction these asteroids have in our charts.

Also, to answer your question re. my DC/TF, Mo Chuisle, transitioned a few years ago...

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posted February 26, 2014 07:46 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Virgo@18.35 in 12th house...

My Dejanira/Asclepius is on your Moon.....

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I find his VERY interesting!! I have a 12h house moon as well...except mine is in Gemini. Also it is almost completely unaspected short of a very wide square to Saturn. I am extremely sensitive to other's energy. Anyone else here have a 12th house moon? Or moon in Pisces?

posted February 26, 2014 07:49 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MorpHnStorM:
Wow! Well isn't that interesting! My 12th is Taurus-Gemini and I do have my Sun, Venus, NNode, and Chiron there. So I know what the 12th is like, and I always thought a 12th Moon has got to be one of the hardest placements...My Moon is in my 4th.

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