posted March 05, 2014 11:13 AM              

tropical:

JESSE conjunct and parallel MARY (2) in 12th, MARY exact conj. Moon

squaring nodal axis

MARIA On 29 Virgo quink. CHiron on 29 Aries

Davison
----------

MARY on 11 Cancer conj. DESC on 13 Cancer
MARY conj. JESSE on 9 Cancer

KARMA 14 Cap widely opp. MARY

MAGDALENA widely conj. YESHUA (3°32) and closely conj. AVX

YESHUA trine Sun (2) - Air signs
MARIA trine Moon (1) - water signs

helio composite
----------------

MARY conjunct JESSE (3)

MAGDALENA conj Saturn exact (17 LEo)

helio Davison
---------------

MAGDALENA (10 Aqua) conj. YESHUA (13 Aqua) conj. Venus (13 Aqua),

tying right into the GT of Venus with Pluto (13 Libra) and Jupiter (14 Gemini)

JESSE conjunct MARY (3) with JEsse on Sirius
and exactly quinkunx Venus and Yeshua

posted March 05, 2014 11:17 AM            

There's no likelihood, or good chance, of being Twin Flames.

We ARE Twin Flames. Period, paragraph.

Okay. There's this hot poker in the middle of my chest. I feel like I have a fever. My hands are tingling, and yet, chills.

I think I'm processing.

posted March 05, 2014 11:29 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
I've come to note several on here tossing out the 'my Twinflame' phrase with surprising regularity. I'm always fascinated by the astrology of it, and have developed some intriguing techniques over time.

First off, I'm not going to seek to disprove with cutting science what someone feels in their soul. We're here to learn, share, and grow, after all. But I have certainly seen repeating patterns among Twinflames, as well as soul mates of varying types, levels and degrees.

A caveat:

I think 'Twinflame' is becoming too synonymous with a concept of be-all, end-all romantic love. Of passionate bonding for the purpose of procreation. This concerns me.

That has always seemed to me the territory of soul mates - which get an unfair thumbs-down in the single-minded pursuit of 'the twin flame'. Twinflames, to me, are simply too important to be mired in otherwise basic objectives. I can't reasonably fathom why any universal or spiritual intelligence would bother with directing or assisting individuals solely here to 'fall in love and procreate'. So, for me, it's NOT about romantic love, even if that CAN be an accompanying emotion. It's rather about sweeping changes, shifting consciousness, and ushering in new paradigms on a global, even transdimensional scale. Big, big stuff.

Soul mates, on the other hand, are the domain of passionate, soul-breathing and heart-rending love and devotion. To come together, build a life, raise children, and love for a lifetime - or more. They're also the purview of those equally tragic, but life-changing forces that begin and end with romance. 'Romance' is the key for soul mates - be they companions, twin souls, (not a Twinflame), or another type of strong soul linkage. 'Passion', depending upon its nature, can figure in either, but ROMANCE is a soul mate trait.

So we'll reasonably find many NODAL links, 12H / 12R connexions, and other evidence of karma or previous incarnations, living, loving, warring, or everything in between.

I've found myself bouncing all over the Internet in search of as many views, theories, and philosophies on the Twinflame phenomenon as I've been able, for many years now. My own infantile concept is rather hodgepodge: drawing upon many elements from various religions, spiritualities, and metaphysical schools.

That being said, I'm interested in the following from those who feel they know their Twinflame, regardless of the relationship involved:

• What does 'Twinflame' mean to you?
• What has brought you to conceptualise it this way?
• Why do you feel this is your Twinflame?
• What astrological factors persist in your determination? Are you using any specific techniques which confirmed your hypothesis?
• Does the degree 2° LIBRA figure in your natals, synastry, or composite? How about 27° SAGITTARIUS?

Simple enough, right? I'll be happy to share my own findings and experiences.

---

I dont belief in twin flames. I feel this is a distraction and is a symptom of an addiction towards idealism. Its an illusion or delusion and only serves to get people to keep looking for that perfect someone that doesn't exist or to attach more meaning to a current relationship so you can feel special and to satisfy the need to label how you feel about this current relationship at the moment but your view on current relationship might change years from now. Also is a way to attach purpose and meaning to your life.

posted March 05, 2014 11:46 AM              

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:

I think I'm processing.

---

posted March 05, 2014 12:48 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
We're not soulmates.

There's no likelihood, or good chance, of being Twin Flames.

We ARE Twin Flames. Period, paragraph.

Okay. There's this hot poker in the middle of my chest. I feel like I have a fever. My hands are tingling, and yet, chills.

I think I'm processing.

---

Right there with you, Indigo. Without the hot poker, but WITH the undeniable realization.

It just is.

posted March 05, 2014 12:54 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by tgem:
Here I am! Just now trying to catch up and process everything that's been written. I'm guilty as charged- becoming attached to a certain outcome...ugh- it's so hard not to when certain feelings are so strong. But alas....I KNOW that's what I need to do. Let destiny run it's course.

I like what Morph said, "the bond/connection will always be there..no matter what." That's comforting...somewhat

Maybe if I wasn't such a romantic at heart!! That's my problem I've decided...way too much neptune in my chart!!!

---

With you, too, Tgem. <3

posted March 05, 2014 12:59 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by amelia28:
I dont belief in twin flames. I feel this is a distraction and is a symptom of an addiction towards idealism. Its an illusion or delusion and only serves to get people to keep looking for that perfect someone that doesn't exist or to attach more meaning to a current relationship so you can feel special and to satisfy the need to label how you feel about this current relationship at the moment but your view on current relationship might change years from now. Also is a way to attach purpose and meaning to life.

I too have pondered a lot about this but if I did belief in twinflames which I Have in the past I would agree with your analysis on to matter, I appreciate you have thought it through thoroughly, too many people don't.

---

I appreciate your points, amelia, and you're not a bit alone in them. There are many ways to tackle the subject, and I'm fortunate to have a background in both science and metaphysics which, I think, allows me good discernment.

I didn't 'believe' in anything, either, and in light of very recent information, I'm finding ways to learn TO believe. I've a feeling that's what a lot of my own journey here is about. (My Jupiter has been called 'the sceptic's Jupiter.')

I also feel that the concept, the theory, allows us to investigate our lives on a dimension we typically wouldn't.

To believe that two people should be together against all odds? It's romantic fantasy. But is there any sort of reality to it? I've been possessed of that question for a very long time, since very young.

I never thought I'd marry. I've never been possessive. I've always believed that love should be free and unconditional.

If only reality worked that way!

I think, however, astrology may hold the keys to understanding our spiritual purpose. WHY we're here - and if it involves another in a significant fashion.

Some of us, even the most sceptical, hand over absolution rights to another human being for guidance. How mad! Why would we do that? It's inexplicable. Yet, we do. It's coming from somewhere - somewhere, we just may not understand. But need to.

This morning, I can't deny the bizarre way I received the email for which I'd been waiting for weeks. The way it felt that someone was holding a heat lamp against - actually, through, within, inside my chest. The way my entire body flushed waves of cold, hot, tingling, then something I can't describe.

Radiating. I was radiating.

Human beings don't radiate, thank you. Heh. But I was. I was radiating.

Love, as we understand it in human terms, is a tricky thing.

Had I been told what I realised I both most feared and yet, felt I could accept, would it change anything?

No. I don't think so. Not at the level of my soul. I'd feel exactly the same. Nothing in my heart would change. I'd still crave to be near him, feel a jolt of energy that lifts me for days when I interact with him, and feel ill, despairing, and a bit broken if he's being sexual with some woman I only know of in passing.

I'd still fear everyday, cry, even pray, to not lose my best friend. Because I don't think I could ever take that. Something on a level I don't understand panics and the whole system starts malfunctioning, heh.

But on the level of my brain?

Yes.

I could do it. I could make myself move on. I could tell myself, he deserves all the happiness I can't give him right now. And maybe it really is just too late for us. But Lane and Fiona, LACHESIS, will go on. How the hell we'll manage to work together in such close proximity .... I flounder there. It's what makes me run. It's what I can't deal with. Because I FEEL ... SO much. Too much to put into words.

Is that because of the Twin Flame connexion? Maybe.

Does it lessen the love I have for my Soulmates? Absolutely not. It doesn't change my dedication to them, or the obligations to which I've committed myself. I'll know when that work is done.

Apparently, we came in with a bit of individual karma to sort out, and a big mutual betrayal. (And I know EXACTLY what that is.)

So what does confirmation do, if anything? Why have those who can do this?

I'm going to learn all that I can from iQ.

I'm going to become his student; I'm going to study. I'm going to continue to collect and consolidate and build the missing link, bridge the gap between mystery and confirmation. Fear and understanding. Despair and hope.

I want to learn how to do what he does, so that I can provide greater reach. Help more.

Because confirmation is motivating on the left-brained, logical level. That which needs something to point to; to say, 'it's BECAUSE of this.'

Some of us NEED that.

I feel the Universe has gifted us with those who will provide confirmation, reassurance, and guidance.

I want to be one of them.

posted March 05, 2014 01:47 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
I appreciate your points, amelia, and you're not a bit alone in them. There are many ways to tackle the subject, and I'm fortunate to have a background in both science and metaphysics which, I think, allows me good discernment.

I didn't 'believe' in anything, either, and in light of very recent information, I'm finding ways to learn TO believe. I've a feeling that's what a lot of my own journey here is about. (My Jupiter has been called 'the sceptic's Jupiter.')

I also feel that the concept, the theory, allows us to investigate our lives on a dimension we typically wouldn't.

To believe that two people should be together against all odds? It's romantic fantasy. But is there any sort of reality to it? I've been possessed of that question for a very long time, since very young.

I never thought I'd marry. I've never been possessive. I've always believed that love should be free and unconditional.

If only reality worked that way!

I think, however, astrology may hold the keys to understanding our spiritual purpose. WHY we're here - and if it involves another in a significant fashion.

Some of us, even the most sceptical, hand over absolution rights to another human being for guidance. How mad! Why would we do that? It's inexplicable. Yet, we do. It's coming from somewhere - somewhere, we just may not understand. But need to.

This morning, I can't deny the bizarre way I received the email for which I'd been waiting for weeks. The way it felt that someone was holding a heat lamp against - actually, through, within, inside my chest. The way my entire body flushed waves of cold, hot, tingling, then something I can't describe.

Radiating. I was radiating.

Human beings don't radiate, thank you. Heh. But I was. I was radiating.

Love, as we understand it in human terms, is a tricky thing.

Had I been told what I realised I both most feared and yet, felt I could accept, would it change anything?

No. I don't think so. Not at the level of my soul. I'd feel exactly the same. Nothing in my heart would change. I'd still crave to be near him, feel a jolt of energy that lifts me for days when I interact with him, and feel ill, despairing, and a bit broken if he's being sexual with some woman I only know of in passing.

I'd still fear everyday, cry, even pray, to not lose my best friend. Because I don't think I could ever take that. Something on a level I don't understand panics and the whole system starts malfunctioning, heh.

But on the level of my brain?

Yes.

I could do it. I could make myself move on. I could tell myself, he deserves all the happiness I can't give him right now. And maybe it really is just too late for us. But Lane and Fiona, LACHESIS, will go on. How the hell we'll manage to work together in such close proximity .... I flounder there. It's what makes me run. It's what I can't deal with. Because I FEEL ... SO much. Too much to put into words.

Is that because of the Twin Flame connexion? Maybe.

Does it lessen the love I have for my Soulmates? Absolutely not. It doesn't change my dedication to them, or the obligations to which I've committed myself. I'll know when that work is done.

Apparently, we came in with a bit of individual karma to sort out, and a big mutual betrayal. (And I know EXACTLY what that is.)

So what does confirmation do, if anything? Why have those who can do this?

I'm going to learn all that I can from iQ.

I'm going to become his student; I'm going to study. I'm going to continue to collect and consolidate and build the missing link, bridge the gap between mystery and confirmation. Fear and understanding. Despair and hope.

I want to learn how to do what he does, so that I can provide greater reach. Help more.

Because confirmation is motivating on the left-brained, logical level. That which needs something to point to; to say, 'it's BECAUSE of this.'

Some of us NEED that.

I feel the Universe has gifted us with those who will provide confirmation, reassurance, and guidance.

I want to be one of them.

I think this might be a good start.

---

I have studied astrology for 15 years and I am still studying it. I belief astrology is an extremely helpful tool and I think I see it as an art combined with science which describe your genes and the different possibilities those genes may express themselves depending on environmental factors. To me astrology is like a behavioral and psychological map.

Astrology shows you when two people have a connection, chemistry or bond or all the above and why.

Astrology does not tell you if someone is your twin flame and I dont think there is such a thing. Astrology tells you how strong the connection is perhaps and what challenges the two of you have to overcome and the nature of the relationship. I have had very intense connections with more than one person and IQ even said that one of them who happens to be my husband is probably my twin flame when he looked at our chart.

There are a lot of people in the world and each human being has the capacity to form very powerful transforming bonds with numerous people if each individual allows it to happen that would match the description of a soulmate or twinflame relationship.

By people assigning the characteristics of a twin flame to just one person all you are doing is limiting yourself making the end of the relationship if it ends much more painful than it has to be because of the ideas you have attached to it.

These concepts makes you attach yourself to someone and to an idea instead of teaching you to let go. Is suppose to be a spiritual concept but it actually strangely has the opposite effect.

But to each its own, we are all at different points in our development and so is ok to see things differently.

posted March 05, 2014 03:17 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by amelia28:
I have studied astrology for 15 years and I am still studying it. I belief astrology is an extremely helpful tool and I think I see it as an art combined with science which describe your genes and the different possibilities those genes may express themselves depending on environmental factors. To me astrology is like a behavioral and psychological map.

Astrology shows you when two people have a connection, chemistry or bond or all the above and why.

Astrology does not tell you if someone is your twin flame and I dont think there is such a thing. Astrology tells you how strong the connection is perhaps and what challenges the two of you have to overcome and the nature of the relationship. I have had very intense connections with more than one person and IQ even said that one of them who happens to be my husband is probably my twin flame when he looked at our chart.

There are a lot of people in the world and each human being has the capacity to form very powerful transforming bonds with numerous people if each individual allows it to happen that would match the description of a soulmate or twinflame relationship.

By people assigning the characteristics of a twin flame to just one person all you are doing is limiting yourself making the end of the relationship if it ends much more painful than it has to be because of the ideas you have attached to it.

These concepts makes you attach yourself to someone and to an idea instead of teaching you to let go. Is suppose to be a spiritual concept but it actually strangely has the opposite effect.

But to each its own, we are all at different points in our development and so is ok to see things differently.

Take Care!

---

Quarter-century for me this year. (Hard to believe that!)

As I'm also a therapist, I understand your concern; and I don't disagree regarding the dangers of unhealthy attachment. It is ironic, as it's suppose to be teaching TO let go - and, in some ways, I suppose, 'let God'.

But yes, fear creeps in. Human beings, it would seem, are possessive by nature. I suppose human lifetimes have at their core lessons in possession.

Soul connexions are not 'designed' to be possessive, however. Perhaps they're so strange and topsy-turvy and uncertain and ever-unfolding because we're supposed to be learning to have faith in the connexion.

Twin Flames does seem a zero sum game, in that respect. And that is dangerous. If one we believe to be, or has been reported to be, our Twin Flame disregards, harms, or breaks from us, that in and of itself seems to be a lesson.

iQ is devising the means of detection and confirmation, and seeking to explicate both individual and joint purpose.

Some, I'm learning, can be Twin Flames, but not come together now for certain reasons. That in and of itself is interesting. The imagination conjures up all sorts of scenarios; it's difficult to say which, if any, are true.

There's one strange key, I think, that's ever-repeating; it's been very much the case in my personal experience.

I've done everything I can to break from this. I even married someone else. I chose to be pragmatic and dutiful, and live my life to the best of my ability, given what I have. I've run, I've hid, I've vanished for long periods.

But any time I resolve to move on with my whole heart and soul, to believe that this is some terrible lingering codependency, with its roots somewhere in my childhood, something I've just not reconciled - something happens.

Actually, no. SOMETHING. HAPPENS.

Not in any small way, either. Something practically waves a sign in front of my face: 'DON'T DO THIS.'

I've lost track. But I've logged the occasions. The 'twin quakes' are the most incredible, frankly.

They were two microquakes, happening at exactly 20:12, in October, 2012, two consecutive days in a row, originating at Venice Beach. 2.01 and 1.02 magnitude. It was SO flabbergasting, I put it in LACHESIS. Even I can't make THAT up.

It's arguable whether the last one was an aftershock of the other, but the seismologists say they were two microquakes originating from the same event, hence, twins. It's an extremely rare event, and had a bunch of the 2012er's going a bit mad over here.

Anyhow, the kiddo's mom described it as a 'loving nudge'. Having been born on the West Coast, she's always attributing the most intriguing 'emotion' to quakes. 'Oh, that one was angry,' or, 'that's a loving nudge.'

This one jolted me. While such low magnitude, originating so nearby, it literally felt like someone kicked the bed. Just one good shove that made me pay attention. And, oh, pay attention I did.

October 2012 was very hard. We'd reached that point of understanding that the relationship we had just wasn't going to work, and neither wanted to admit it. Placing limitations and restrictions on it causes the whole engine to fail after too long. Jealousies, no outlet for expressing the intensity between us - it was bad.

So, that's when I first resolved to let it go. Move on. All that jazz. I remember firmly saying, to the Universe, (as I'd decided, once and for all, that summer, that I have this connexion to it, and THAT hasn't changed; my mother was so relieved, heh,) I said:

'I'm lost. I'm confused. I have NO idea where I'm going, or WHAT you want, or expect me to do. I NEED guidance. I can't DO this on my own now. So, if you don't show me something, something I can undeniably point to, and say, 'oh, THAT's something,' soon - tonight - hell, even now, within the next ten minutes - then ... I'm sorry. I really, really am - but I'm done. I'm delusional. This is crazy. And it's gone on long enough. Okay? ... Okay.'

I waited for about 3 minutes. No song came on the radio that felt 'a-ha!' to me, and it was nowhere near 11:11 / 23:11. I sighed, rather frustratedly shoved my head into my pillow, threw the covers over, and said:

'I'm an idiot.'

JUST as I closed my eyes - it happened.

I jolted up out of bed - and started LAUGHING. Laughing my arse off! My husband was downstairs gaming. I called out, 'Did you feel that?'

He seemed surprised by the question; responded a few seconds later. ' ... Yeah?'

'That was a quake, wasn't it?'

' ... If you could call it that. It was pretty small.'

Within 5 minutes, they'd reported the magnitude on the app I use. I've got screenshots somewhere.

Then, it was what I needed.

But I take a LOT of convincing.

Since then, it's been a helluva roller coaster. Back and forth, up and down ... songs, and things in pairs. My 'twin gaspeite rings', for example. Yin-yangs. Mirrored numbers - and, of course - 11:11.

But the signs are there. I DON'T have to look for them. They're THERE. And the times which they become the most in-my-face are when I'm letting him go.

Just as soon as I'd resolved to REALLY let it go this time, despite whatever, deciding that, this was going to happen eventually; I'm hanging on to something I don't even understand - and why? Not to mention he is, too. We're hurting ourselves. And each other. I need to be the one to cut the cord. I have to.

BAM.

Mars Retrograde's going, 'STOP! What did you not do in 2012? Because the relationship you had then is coming back.'

... !@#$%.

What did I NOT do in 2012? Oh, Jesus. Lemme think.

In all honesty, though, amelia - and you're talking to a scientist here - I've seen too much. WAY too much I can't explain.

There's SOMETHING to all this. Like you, I don't know what. But I'm paying attention now.

posted March 05, 2014 03:18 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by amelia28:
I have studied astrology for 15 years and I am still studying it. I belief astrology is an extremely helpful tool and I think I see it as an art combined with science which describe your genes and the different possibilities those genes may express themselves depending on environmental factors. To me astrology is like a behavioral and psychological map.

Astrology shows you when two people have a connection, chemistry or bond or all the above and why.

Astrology does not tell you if someone is your twin flame and I dont think there is such a thing. Astrology tells you how strong the connection is perhaps and what challenges the two of you have to overcome and the nature of the relationship. I have had very intense connections with more than one person and IQ even said that one of them who happens to be my husband is probably my twin flame when he looked at our chart.

There are a lot of people in the world and each human being has the capacity to form very powerful transforming bonds with numerous people if each individual allows it to happen that would match the description of a soulmate or twinflame relationship.

By people assigning the characteristics of a twin flame to just one person all you are doing is limiting yourself making the end of the relationship if it ends much more painful than it has to be because of the ideas you have attached to it.

These concepts makes you attach yourself to someone and to an idea instead of teaching you to let go. Is suppose to be a spiritual concept but it actually strangely has the opposite effect.

But to each its own, we are all at different points in our development and so is ok to see things differently.

Take Care!

---

TF relationship is just to represent 2 souls become one and what the wholesomeness of that relationship can do. Indeed it has been over-idealized in the wrong direction.

posted March 05, 2014 03:49 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by summerlite:
TF relationship is just to represent 2 souls become one and what the wholesomeness of that relationship can do. Indeed it has been over-idealized in the wrong direction.

---

posted March 05, 2014 03:55 PM              

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
Quarter-century for me this year. (Hard to believe that!)

---

Yes, it is.

posted March 05, 2014 04:45 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
Quarter-century for me this year. (Hard to believe that!)

As I'm also a therapist, I understand your concern; and I don't disagree regarding the dangers of unhealthy attachment. It is ironic, as it's suppose to be teaching TO let go - and, in some ways, I suppose, 'let God'.

But yes, fear creeps in. Human beings, it would seem, are possessive by nature. I suppose human lifetimes have at their core lessons in possession.

Soul connexions are not 'designed' to be possessive, however. Perhaps they're so strange and topsy-turvy and uncertain and ever-unfolding because we're supposed to be learning to have faith in the connexion.

Twin Flames does seem a zero sum game, in that respect. And that is dangerous. If one we believe to be, or has been reported to be, our Twin Flame disregards, harms, or breaks from us, that in and of itself seems to be a lesson.

iQ is devising the means of detection and confirmation, and seeking to explicate both individual and joint purpose.

Some, I'm learning, can be Twin Flames, but not come together now for certain reasons. That in and of itself is interesting. The imagination conjures up all sorts of scenarios; it's difficult to say which, if any, are true.

There's one strange key, I think, that's ever-repeating; it's been very much the case in my personal experience.

I've done everything I can to break from this. I even married someone else. I chose to be pragmatic and dutiful, and live my life to the best of my ability, given what I have. I've run, I've hid, I've vanished for long periods.

But any time I resolve to move on with my whole heart and soul, to believe that this is some terrible lingering codependency, with its roots somewhere in my childhood, something I've just not reconciled - something happens.

Actually, no. SOMETHING. HAPPENS.

Not in any small way, either. Something practically waves a sign in front of my face: 'DON'T DO THIS.'

I've lost track. But I've logged the occasions. The 'twin quakes' are the most incredible, frankly.

They were two microquakes, happening at exactly 20:12, in October, 2012, two consecutive days in a row, originating at Venice Beach. 2.01 and 1.02 magnitude. It was SO flabbergasting, I put it in LACHESIS. Even I can't make THAT up.

It's arguable whether the last one was an aftershock of the other, but the seismologists say they were two microquakes originating from the same event, hence, twins. It's an extremely rare event, and had a bunch of the 2012er's going a bit mad over here.

Anyhow, the kiddo's mom described it as a 'loving nudge'. Having been born on the West Coast, she's always attributing the most intriguing 'emotion' to quakes. 'Oh, that one was angry,' or, 'that's a loving nudge.'

This one jolted me. While such low magnitude, originating so nearby, it literally felt like someone kicked the bed. Just one good shove that made me pay attention. And, oh, pay attention I did.

October 2012 was very hard. We'd reached that point of understanding that the relationship we had just wasn't going to work, and neither wanted to admit it. Placing limitations and restrictions on it causes the whole engine to fail after too long. Jealousies, no outlet for expressing the intensity between us - it was bad.

So, that's when I first resolved to let it go. Move on. All that jazz. I remember firmly saying, to the Universe, (as I'd decided, once and for all, that summer, that I have this connexion to it, and THAT hasn't changed; my mother was so relieved, heh,) I said:

'I'm lost. I'm confused. I have NO idea where I'm going, or WHAT you want, or expect me to do. I NEED guidance. I can't DO this on my own now. So, if you don't show me something, something I can undeniably point to, and say, 'oh, THAT's something,' soon - tonight - hell, even now, within the next ten minutes - then ... I'm sorry. I really, really am - but I'm done. I'm delusional. This is crazy. And it's gone on long enough. Okay? ... Okay.'

I waited for about 3 minutes. No song came on the radio that felt 'a-ha!' to me, and it was nowhere near 11:11 / 23:11. I sighed, rather frustratedly shoved my head into my pillow, threw the covers over, and said:

'I'm an idiot.'

JUST as I closed my eyes - it happened.

I jolted up out of bed - and started LAUGHING. Laughing my arse off! My husband was downstairs gaming. I called out, 'Did you feel that?'

He seemed surprised by the question; responded a few seconds later. ' ... Yeah?'

'That was a quake, wasn't it?'

' ... If you could call it that. It was pretty small.'

Within 5 minutes, they'd reported the magnitude on the app I use. I've got screenshots somewhere.

Then, it was what I needed.

But I take a LOT of convincing.

Since then, it's been a helluva roller coaster. Back and forth, up and down ... songs, and things in pairs. My 'twin gaspeite rings', for example. Yin-yangs. Mirrored numbers - and, of course - 11:11.

But the signs are there. I DON'T have to look for them. They're THERE. And the times which they become the most in-my-face are when I'm letting him go.

Just as soon as I'd resolved to REALLY let it go this time, despite whatever, deciding that, this was going to happen eventually; I'm hanging on to something I don't even understand - and why? Not to mention he is, too. We're hurting ourselves. And each other. I need to be the one to cut the cord. I have to.

BAM.

Mars Retrograde's going, 'STOP! What did you not do in 2012? Because the relationship you had then is coming back.'

... !@#$%.

What did I NOT do in 2012? Oh, Jesus. Lemme think.

In all honesty, though, amelia - and you're talking to a scientist here - I've seen too much. WAY too much I can't explain.

There's SOMETHING to all this. Like you, I don't know what. But I'm paying attention now.

---

posted March 06, 2014 01:10 AM            

What do you think it means when you start having regular dreams of nowhere? I never remember my dreams, this is unusual for me!

posted March 06, 2014 01:21 AM              

For me there are different kind of dreams.

some are just that, dreams, me processing something.

But then there is the other variety, which feels like something else entirely.
these dreams have a weird feel to them, some times like in slow-motion, it`s difficult to explain.

Oh and of course I was waking up in the middle of the night last night as well.

BTW I dreamed of Mr Sag a week or so before first seeing him, but somehow it didn`t register with me, and I only saw him coincidentally again after 2 years, and in these 3 months between the second time seeing him somewhere unintentionally and the third time when I spoke to him, there was a wild set of dreams. Every.Freaking.Night. (at least those I remembered)

I have dreamed of him after that,t oo, though it has become more rare, and usually nowadays it is a few days before seeing him somewhere and gives a pretty good picture how it is going to be in advance.

The last dream left me puzzled, cause I saw him, and then suddenly he seemed to have disappeared (though not for too long), and it didn`t make any sense to me, as he was on stage. How can he disappear?

Well, as it happened on the actual event it was not him, it was ME who disappeared for a few minutes (cause I felt unwell).

But that is usually how these dreams are nowadays. Almost like a preparation.

posted March 06, 2014 01:35 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
I know I've read where some have dreams about their twin....what does it mean when you do??
I have been having dreams regularly with him in them, this is new to me! I've had a couple in a few years but to have them every night is just strange!!
I finally remembered one last night!

What do you think it means when you start having regular dreams of nowhere? I never remember my dreams, this is unusual for me!

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I wish I knew, Gabby.

posted March 06, 2014 01:38 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ceridwen:
It depends, Gabby.

For me there are different kind of dreams.

some are just that, dreams, me processing something.

But then there is the other variety, which feels like something else entirely.
these dreams have a weird feel to them, some times like in slow-motion, it`s difficult to explain.

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posted March 06, 2014 01:50 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
YES! That's the PERFECT description! I feel like I'm fighting 'against' something. As if for control. Slow motion is an excellent way to describe it.

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I was searching for the right word. Actually what I also wanted to describe is how it feels like wading through a stream or slight resistance. Like quick-sand, but not pulling you down. It is difficult.

posted March 06, 2014 01:52 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
I wish I knew, Gabby.

I DO know that after the Full Moon, I was having them regularly of him. And, like you, that's so strange for me!

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February fullmoons are crazy for me!

posted March 06, 2014 02:04 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by IndigoDirae:
Wow. It's been quiet today. I wonder what we're all doing. I know I'm processing. Heh.

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Indigo, I saw your note and I appreciate so much what you've shared with us. I was busy, and busy having an emotional fit of my own today (at least, on the inside)...Occasionally, it still happens.

So much of what you've said, well...all I can say as that I really do understand...I feel you...

posted March 06, 2014 02:35 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ceridwen:
I was searching for the right word. Actually what I also wanted to describe is how it feels like wading through a stream or slight resistance. Like quick-sand, but not pulling you down. It is difficult.

It is like the frequencies are not compeletely congruent. Like my thoughts or spirit is too light and quick for the environment (or the other way round, Id on´t know), and such it is a little distorted or slow motion like.

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