posted December 05, 2020 10:51 AM            

It's "the weekend" and have not heard anything back, so he failed, at his own word, to answer to a simple, personal question. Nah... pass.

Wish I had genuine opportunities to fuss myself over with---this is bored soul-trash. ::sigh::

I somehow asked for this ridiculous week and want to look over where I slipped, study myself, minding the eclipse. Had reflexes, but dang, apparently not gonna have normal business with a natal chart the way it is. Uranians and Neptunians with Plutonian-skeleton keys to my (7th) house. Comedic experiences, really. A man walks into a bar... and buys an international plane ticket for a woman he won't talk to. Oh, another joke: by putting the Capricious in Capricorn.

Did I really create this? Cheers.

posted December 05, 2020 01:34 PM              

If you do want a partner eventually (?), and if you haven't already tried this, then would suggest specifically making an intention during deep meditation asking your Expanded self/guidance, Source, the Creative Forces something like, "If it is within your Will and the highest plans for all involved, can I please be sent a partner of fast vibration, balance, and strong attunement to divine Love?"

Then visualize such a person coming to you--not necessarily physically, but say focusing on their energy and aura--say a person with a lot of deep blue, some nice rose pinks, cyans, or emerald greens (positive Venusian attunement), nice violets or nice purples, golden light, White Light. Lol, you don't want them too fast vibratory, or they likely won't have any interest in a romantic relationship--hence don't try for the all White Light or even all golden light person (well, not too many of these in human form anyways).

posted December 06, 2020 04:37 AM            

ha!
at it again with the emotional labour.

finie.

(note: he’a really some kind of energy vampire. Whenever I receive these text messages my body hurts and start yawning profusely.)

posted December 06, 2020 04:22 PM              

quote:

---

Originally posted by todd:
Probably for the best.
You seem to have a strong astral affect on people. It's been a while since I looked at your chart.you might add the asteroid aura 1488
todd

---

She does, combination of strong Yin energy with very strong Mars (very Yang energy), and then practicing things like meditation, chanting, creative work, etc

Past lives as priestess and priests of Children of the Law of One in Atlantis and ancient Egypt. One that I sense went to the dark side some, so to speak, in one of those lives, but most devoted to the Love/Light side.

Interesting Soul.

posted December 06, 2020 04:28 PM              

quote:

---

Thanks. I don’t think I want a partner in the traditional sense at this moment in time... but will keep all these colors close-by

Rather open to collaboration: inspiration and genius and creative liberty

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I see. Btw, don't know why I forgot Neptune in the mix. Adding in Neptune and Aquarius (Saturn ruler of DESC in Aquarius) with the Capricorn and Uranus, this definitely tips the blue more to the indigo side of the spectrum.

Odd, random question: Do you like to dance a lot in general, and maybe with a focus on something like Middle Eastern belly dance type form? Just trying to figure out some possible connections.

posted December 06, 2020 05:08 PM            

G, interesting. many people have at a glance assumed I’m a professional dancer (of modern or ballet). This particular outlet is not anything I would need to survive, like most true dancers, though understand the benefits. I like to dance, sure, would like to have more opportunity for body practices in general. I was scouted for collegiate level tennis once upon a time. My Mars is OOB.

posted December 06, 2020 06:51 PM              

Btw, I prefer to be called "OG" or "G.o.L" i.e. original gangsta or gangster of Love.

posted December 23, 2020 05:19 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by vansio:
he booked tickets for Jan 20 - Jan 26
on this week tr. Pluto exact-conjunct his Venus and I’ll have my nodal reversal

---

I had a dream of him the other night, then, coincidentally, the following day he reached out to me again. We hadn’t spoken since I cancelled a couple weeks ago, which I had been happy about.

I sternly repeated that the coffee was cancelled. this turned into a serious conversation of truths, for a few hours, taking turns asking precise questions to each other, about the alleged connection, misunderstanding, etc.

Chances are I will be going on that Plutonian date with him. Although there will be no open shops, hard lock down, this man is flying in during. Which probably translates to 5 days of only each other, no museums or social events, only essential walks and to-go coffee. Wild.

Guess it’s better to go with the flow and not worry about repercussions of reconnecting with a past fling.

posted December 23, 2020 01:19 PM            

I still don’t know how I feel about it. Yesterday’s convo was fine, a little exciting to be given extended attention, but he’s a fish, gone the next day (and back eventually later.) I was spoiled with consistent TLC in my last relationship, so anything less than in my face feels unreliable and discouraging, even though pace is perfectly fine, average.

posted January 06, 2021 12:02 PM            

otherwise, fairly confused by this ongoing connection. wonder, what’s the point

why is this guy so withholding? I get it.. Taurus Mars but sheesh

Also, the alleged square between my Moon and his Mars, out of sign, Capricorn and Taurus, so doesn’t seem reasonable. So where’s the poop? great synastry.... obviously enduring... but like snails... hurts my heart... never felt this alone whilst engaging with someone. odd

my Venus also conjunct his IC. mirroring the Moon-Venus conjunction perhaps? Same could be said for Neptune-DSC and Neptune-Venus

posted January 13, 2021 01:11 PM            

our moons are parallel in declination by orb 0°06’
my Sun conjunct his Su/Mo midpoint

posted January 14, 2021 01:38 AM            

The ghost of previous years (that we never got to together, the disappointment with fate) causes me to question his current intention without reinforcement - a trust issue.

I’m very back and forth about meeting him, which he realizes. I’ll know when he’s here how to fit this situation into my daily life, than the current default of whim and fantasy.

I wrote to him disrespectfully a day ago, sort of devilishly, and now reeling back from that. He reacted emotionally to my accusation* [of deception, rather, about his omission] then I was quickly ashamed to speak with such rhetoric having lost the instinct to take care. Acknowledging space and privacy right now, which is better suited for the underlying circumstance. for him to take the lead if moving forward is his desire.

* «[...] Now to tell me that I was lying is not ok. If the liar comment is directed towards my current status with my ex, that’s just as thorny. It’s like asking someone who exits a lake of ice cold water for the current temperature outside. That’s not helping and I wish you respect some privacy as well. When I say I’m uncomfortable talking about certain things, pls consider, it might have nothing to do with you.»

...poetic counterpart. My mum tells me I need to allow myself to surrender to a love experience, for its own sake, even if nothing more than just a couple of days, even if it’s just for escaping. Though I’ve upset him now so the pressure to oblige is off.*

Something tells me it’s not exactly over between them (he and his ex), the struggle and burnout. Their synastry is mostly sexual, Sun-Mars conjunct both ways, with a Saturn-Venus conjunction and Saturn-Venus square.

Thanks for asking though. I like writing things through..