posted January 23, 2017 06:50 PM            

Glad to see that you are okay too, Randall.
I know your state got hit.
I was thinking of you.

posted January 25, 2017 06:14 PM            

In the mean time, there were small international (by costumes) tribe small-groups of people walking the Paths with Torches. I saw these glittering against a vivid Golden twilight-type of setting sun, which sky revealed the outline of a bowl of dark hill-mountains.

I watched as people began slowly to come over those mountain-hills, each group having one or two lit torches, coming into and filling in the dark bowl like an amphitheater.

I saw the twinkling lights... against the Darkness.

Then... I became aware of Hearing (spiritually) God's Voice speaking to me, with no-drama or woo woo, and said that these were my Assignment ... assigned to these people....

Then the vision was done, and I was back in the room with 50 other people that night, involved in their own private activity...

It was an event called 'Compassion Night'.....

I'd only had one other same kind of Open vision like that in my lifetime. The end of this week is the anniversary of the absolutely incredible sublime experience I had had in a very small conference, during a worship music experience.

Saturday morning of Jan 27, 2001...
The Sun was 7+ Aquarius conjunct Neptune, with the Moon in earlier Pisces all day. Venus was in Pisces at 23+ degrees... and would turn retro at 17+ Aries... Towards the end of her retrograde cycle, I relocated here to this city...
Friday April 6, 2001...
She was at 4/5 Aries rolling backwards, and turned Direct on April 20 at 1.27 Aries.
By the time she reached my natal IC (moving directly), I established official residency here...

In that worship-triggered OUTSTANDING Experience I had LEFT this world completely, and Stood in Heavenly Places... I was unaware of the room where my body was. It all happened within a minute or a few?... but had the Experience of being much much longer.

I became aware of God's Voice again saying to me, that 'You Belong TO ME'....

For me, these are Consecration Times... Anniversaries I've had... And I see the patterns have been set up for having MORE of these.... I've had transits where I 'should' have had some more before this, but my environment here 'blocked' that from occurring.

Please Lord, Don't let my environment block the potential again. I NEED to Hear Your Voice once more....

That 'Compassion Night' vision occurred one week before the New Moon ECLIPSE, Aug 22, 1979, at 29.01 LEO.

We will be HAVING another Eclipse WITHIN a degree of that SAME point next Aug 21, 2017 at 28.53 LEO....

Lord... Let your Light-Gatherers bring their Tribes, their Torches... Let Us Make Your World a Better Place!

UNITED in Love, Under the Banner of Love and Everything Holy To You....

Bring This World into a State of Healing and Incredible Peace Felt like a Beautiful Blanket steadying us all on Earth.

This video is creepy-Echoing the visuals of my Experience.....

Wishing Everyone sooooo much Incredible Love!
Be Filled....

posted January 28, 2017 10:04 PM            

I'd even say that some of what I've seen and heard is deplorable...

A little while ago, I came across this message I wrote under a different topic in this forum, on April 19, 2013.

I want to gather and be in the company with great Lights: with the ones that fill Dark Valleys holding the Torch of Service for Humanity...
-- to be a Citizen of Honor for my Country,
and also as a citizen of a Wider World, to CARE for and about the strangers, and ones looking to find their place in this world,
-- to live and strive and anchor with similar Hearts who uphold the Ideals of making this a BETTER world....

I am An American...

This is one of the Ideals I share with MILLIONS of others here on this Land.

(clip) Statue of Liberty Poem (Emma Lazarus)[1:29] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4wYFs5F76E

Poem by Emma Lazarus engraved on a tablet within the pedestal on which the Statue of Liberty stands.

The New Colossus

Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name
Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
"Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries she
With silent lips. "Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

--Emma Lazarus
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emma_Lazarus

{{PM, EricF, I was JUST going to post that url to New Colossus vid, when I saw your newsletter! We are in parallel.}}

God, Have Mercy. Bless our Nation.
Protect ALL Peoples. Heal Relationships....

posted January 30, 2017 04:20 PM            

....

posted February 07, 2017 11:32 PM            

But you're right about the stress, so for right now... I'd decline.

{{Besides, I'd need to understand the computer link-up between self and LL better first.}}

Been EXTRA stressed with ongoing 'hood sonics issues!! (and chronic headaches from that now)

Thanks for stopping by....
(And I hope that your ear, and that cold, are better. ..)

posted February 08, 2017 07:55 PM            

I could do the job as far as talking to people, typing info on the screen, giving out verbal ref numbers to appropriate side-orgs when our nonprofit org didn't have the funding to support that service.

Thing is... That 'knowledge field' is basically foreign to me. I'm not only learning how to do the 'office' things, but at the same time trying to do a very quick crash-course in what all the terms mean. I have to know (for me) what those law-terms are, in order to make good judgement and code their issues correctly.

I got thrown a few curveballs.

It was my first day flying COMPLETELY solo, in a room, faraway in a distant Galaxy, with no Human Form. ..... The trainer was off in a different part of the building training someone new (so she wasn't at-hand).

The other person who usually sits in adjoining office was missing.

I was basically "all by myself" trying to draw on everything I absorbed for ~2 hours, one time/chance a week, for 4 weeks.

I had spent at least an hour or more time on my own additionally, to dissect the manual, Virgo Moon Style!!! Oh yeah, we be thorough!

I stuffed a GLUT of information in my head. It was THERE!!! My instincts were trying to search the mental data-files and connect to the closest and most-appropriate bit of information.

Thing is? I wasn't SURE on some calls, if I was telling the client the right thing. It would have been better for me to have one more day of sitting with the trainer somewhere physically nearby.

I had maybe 15 minutes of solo last week. THIS 2 hours (my time period), WITH the Moon in emotional Cancer??? was ~crazy!

I DON'T like 'making mistakes'.
I want to do EVERYTHING 'perfectly'!
I want to have ALL Possible-answers down pat, IN ADVANCE. lol
I wanted ALL security (within myself) that I was giving whatever-client 'the best' of possible options to connect to.

oy ~~ ... I was asked some question I didn't know was 'also known as' ... the main org! duh ~whatever.

I felt dumb.
I felt stupid, .... and then fogged!

I had to go back to the caller, who has been waiting sooo PATIENTLY for me (I was mindful FOR them, of 'how much time' they were spending on Hold)....
Then, arrrrggghhhhhh.

I 'might' have made some imperfect or incomplete recommendations. I left work wondering, doubting, if I could do this?

Add to it that my headache was very painful that day too, so I was dealing with brain-lining-burn.

criteria: Unless I'm germ-catchy, I consider and tell myself *no excuse*!!! You've GOT to fulfill your job-Promise. SHOW UP, and do the work! ... oh yeah. 'I be mean' to myself like that.

ohhhhh my. I felt sooo demoralized.

head-conversations ...

Analyzing down to every little pixel-grain--- what went wrong here????? to the bitter ends!!!

COULD I do this job?

answer... Yes I can do all the basic things. I could answer all the questions I KNEW 'where' to find answers.
I have a good repore with all the others in the office that I've met.

... But there were the Answers that I 'thought' I should KNOW--- and whoah.... My head went into a bright-neutral WITH the gas pedal still heavily engaged. My head kinda 'knew'.. but had a freewheely, swirly-whirly thing going on-- like those frozen youtube screens.

* Are You Experiencing An Interruption?! *
It's like, ______________________ .

It would have been nice to have a human to double-check.
I'm OUT of my Field of Expertise with them.

After I left... and walked a bit, I felt edges of shame. I felt like a dumb kid, so deflated. I started to (actually) cry hidden tears (on the bus). Felt sooooo defeated.

I mean..... (convo continued)---
How can I Be A Success, if I can't do SOME kind of job???? (booo hoooo)

OH.... *drama* Nobody is going to want to hire you!!! (boooo hoooey hooooo)

Laughing at myself here, in a really mature and understanding way. I had my whole career-mind crash that afternoon. Felt like such a deject-reject.

I mean, it's bad enough if you get fired from a PAYING job? ... but, (LOL), how about the absolute, abject humiliation of hearing that your Volunteer Job wouldn't want you either???
(ohhh gushy~ boooo hoooo *wails*)

Rm said, Well at LEAST they have someone answering the phones for them. That's a good thing to have....

I cried like character Laura on Dick van Dyke show.
But!!! It's NOT the saaaammmee. I did it soooo imperfectly!!!!
*tears, wailing, gnashing of teeth*

Well.

Humor set aside now..........

I knew the Value of Astrology right then. What REALLY helped me out, was having already heard what the forecast was for the day. I didn't really think that much about it, until I NEEDED to tap into a few astro-vidder/podcaster voice-recalls.

You all 'Helped' me the whole afternoon.

I knew astrology had helped me get my act together over these years. But it was 'at that moment' of Breakdown, that I REALLY was able to tap how INCREDIBLE your broadcasts/works are.

Thank you.

posted February 10, 2017 04:44 PM            

I've been listening to some SamG's intro vid-snippets to a Vedic relationship study course. So Rich! I'm getting insights even from his snippets.

*in case he reads*
{talking to my invisible people here, *ahem* Laughing!}
You're a great teacher, and I surely appreciate your including those very much.

As you know, I don't have the money for purchasing (~anyone's!!) readings, apps, or for joining the now fee-based groups, and online-courses. I'm feeling abandoned and left behind. *sniff, sniff*

Besides which, this place (where I currently reside) doesn't have conducive learning conditions; and its not the best for health.
.. (But I AM deeply grateful for having a roof over my head; and for an rm that I can and do get along with. Having a generally cooperative peaceful relationship and atmosphere in the home is vital to me. (I don't do home-atmospheres of fighting, strife, and prolonged relationship misery well.)

Were I even to be given full-scholarships? I would lack the 'Quality' time to fully dissect and thoroughly ingest the Valuable materials that were taught and paid-for.

Plus, my living space is very small and compact... You need private space and good reference shelving systems in place in order to do work and deep study. There are resources I have in my bins, that are difficultly smoothed for me to access with it looking like a hurricane hit my place.

These are a resource I can use--- but I guess I do okay with my writing here (LL), with what resources I can get to.

Like JJ had told me once... it's what's ALREADY within you that will be most valuable.

Today?... The vibeys are soooo strong and thick-- (affecting my feeling of health, and probably since it has been a chronic day-to-day environmental hazard, I ~worry about being able to fully recover what I had moving in here-- (but now, I'm older too). It was a trade-off for what I needed at the time to stay alive. Now I worry that I have added physical-limitations, narrowing my exit-options?... I hope not.)

It has interfered with being able to prep to go to a Volunteer job! They have no idea what I go through in order to show up 'like everyone else.' Then last time, I walked in the room and noted there was a piece of equipment running that hadn't been there for the month before.

...Of course?, it COULD have been the enhancing effect of an ongoing burn-feeling headache' that made me more sensitive?

Because, it's not usually just 'one' piece that bothers me, but when there is a cacophony of bad-resonancers going on simultaneously, that triggers the health-feeling woes.

Often, over the weekends, and on Mondays, the problems have been worse than other days.

Today, for example, the traffic from nearby International Airport have jet-aircrafts utilizing the runway that fly right over my building, every minute-or-five! They also use the additional two other runway-paths that run both either sides of this building, concurrent with the middle one. (Extra inundations today.)

There's a large swath of land that is affected here by busy air-traffic.... Ranging from very wealthy homes, to the lower income 'hoods, jets are equal-opportunity shaking and noise hazards to a town or a city, no matter WHERE you are on the planet! That's something we all have in common? *grin*

(Of course, there is NO comparison to those individuals who live in war-zones pummeled by planes, guns, bombings..... My Heart feels such SORROWS for you there.... You have my deepest more sincere Prayers. God Keep You Safe!, and bring people with provisions to help you each step of the way!)

Things are certainly not Equal in life? and yet some other things are!...

As far as keeping a Good attitude goes, I am not shorted in that. I am always WILLING to DO the Best that I Can, with what I got! Always.... And I have curiosity and a willingness to Learn and try new things!

So anyways... This was a diva-length post, and I cropped it before doing the Submit button. I could delineate things and systems all day long!

Going a little further with thoughts about Understanding people--

This is the anniversary of a loss of an astrologer-friend-- a vid-mentor to me, and for the astrology and spiritual community he touched. I send extra-Care wishes to RickL, whom I'd say knew him best. {{ }}

JJ was my first 'personalized' portal introduction and baptism into REAL astrology, after I had gained an awareness and study-interest in it. (Was before I came to LL).

I still recall the first minutes of my phone reading with him. It was completely disarming to me--- the person who liked to hide her flaws and imperfections, and to give the world a face of sturdiness and strength as though 'there's nothing wrong here, everything's fine'...

From his looking at my natal chart--- some of his first words to me, after he broke silence, were soft gentle compassionate deep and strong.... asking quietly, 'What happened inside 'that' house, between you and your mother?...' It was like he knew. I came undone inside.

Even now, I'm bawling like a baby today, and feeling so vulnerable and raw.... AND Grateful that I had had the chance to have had my own chart read, privately, by someone who had been doing this for nearly ~40 years?

You see, it IS possible to see that a person COULD have had an abuse happen, by certain MULTIPLE indicators synthesized in a chart.

I remember him saying that he would ordinarily not tell a client this-- but he said he wanted me to 'act selfish'... whatever I'd consider 'selfish' to be? Act Selfish. ... And to GO towards my Venus. Fulfill her.

Now that I am including the asteroid goddess aspects too, it is clearer. You can have this chart and were that the environment of care had been supportive, then adverse things in the home would have more easily built strength, and only been incidental rather than unduly traumatizing.

You see, it DOES take a Village to raise a healthy child. HAD the adults in my life only known what was happening with me... I wonder that HAD my family remained geographically closer to the extendeds, then I might have been able to have had their assistance and supports? (My parents would have also.) By that, would I or could I have utilized the energy in my chart differently?

At age 7 1/2, the family-unit moved...

Changed my IC from Aries to a Pisces~IC environment... dissolved, and left (personally by relatives now remote) to the lost waters of the Cosmos. Left-behind, unknowingly. I was thrust from one bi-language into full immersion into another RIGHT at the point where I was trying to 'anchor' my language-verbal skills for me. I had to switch from 'thinking' in one language to another... amidst incredible confusion, and cascades of deaths of key people. Somehow I feel that I had failed gaining verbal-mastery and grounding the confidence in BOTH?

"The Fog of Unknowing!!!" LOL ...
*gently, and Knowingly smiling here*

One of the best things that I gained from having had a personal reading, was the validation received. I was hidden, and it 'uncovered' me... I had remained HIDDEN in my own mind for so long. Always pushing forward forward forward. Pressing myself, while KNOWING and feeling within that I had been broken tooo many times in my life.

So... I say in the ethers, Thank you for 'Seeing Me' that day.

I thought I had HIDDEN so well in those shadowy deeps, and you, with your natal Scorpio Moon in my Scorpio 12th, (trine my chart ruler Jupiter Cancer cnj Uranus, 8th), unknowingly began to undo more of my isolation and Wall that day.

Cusp Scorpio H12... has my 21485 Ash conjunct h13(apogee)Lilith, conjunct 4580 Child in Scorpio.

....

AND!!!

Today "just happens" to be Roberta Flack's Birthday.

Wishing her Happy Greetings on her birthday!

This song is perfect for describing what it feels like to be Known by an unknown stranger-- and by an astrologer (now deceased) who didn't realize the Good he had Performed, by affirming my life in his reading.

This once-Hidden Child, whose life was scarred by abuse, started to Understanding her own self, through the study of astrology.

posted February 10, 2017 10:25 PM            

(music) Stars (Ēriks Ešenvalds, Voces8, music score) [3:58] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I50-fqV2WKo

lyrics

Flame and Shadow (1920)
~Sara Teasdale

*Stars*
Alone in the night
On a dark hill
With pines around me
Spicy and still,

And a heaven full of stars
Over my head,
White and topaz
And misty red;

Myriads with beating
Hearts of fire
That aeons
Cannot vex or tire;

Up the dome of heaven
Like a great hill,
I watch them marching
Stately and still,

And I know that I
Am honored to be
Witness
Of so much majesty.