posted March 03, 2017 11:27 PM            

Venus in Aries, right now, is still an Evening Star, but she is fading fast? She's due to go retrograde tomorrow.

When March 25, 2017 arrives, (retro on my IC Aries), she'll be turning into a Morning Star. A new Venus Cycle starts, for 19 months.

When I relocated here, on Friday morning, April 6, 2001, Venus was retro at 5+ (to 4) Aries.

My Venus Taurus 5th IS a Morning Star Venus.

Even though I might be coming on some long-term transits from hell! LOL, (actually *whimpering*), I HAVE seen that there will be some good ones happening concurrently.

Neptune sextile Venus
Neptune trine Saturn

I'm coming up on Neptune sextile natal Venus Taurus H5, during a Neptune trine natal Saturn Scorpio H11.

Neptune has been square my ASC/DESC too for months, and hit its peak the other day.

Gotta GRAB and cultivate the GOOD as well as the not-so's.

"Just happened" too, that I finally had registered and began taking some computer basics refreshing courses at my main local library.

They also have a Beautiful media innovations technology center. After I am able to schedule an Orientation and (official) tour through it, I will be eligible to take all the courses and play with techs for Creative Arts.

I'm excited about the possibility of putting images, vids, music, poetry, stories, together as my own creative expressions. (Maybe even DO that for people who would be interested?)
Had a daring thought to act some storytelling in a youtube?, but it scared me too much?!!
hahaha I might have to do that in some kind of project eventually though?

But I want to be careful not to exaggerate.

I have no idea if I'd be good in front of a camera.
~~ Well?, there was that one time in a drama workshop with Cliff Osmond several decades ago.
(When I was gorgeous! LOL... but I'm seriously wasted-tired looking now. Been through so much sorrow, and I fear and think that it shows up in the background of my face on camera now?)

So... I showed up for the course at the library yesterday having one of my 'rainbow' migraines. Tiny circle pieces of the screen were missing (had to adapt), but eventually yay, my vision cleared up.

At the end of the course, my teacher was interested that I am into astrology. She gave her birthday but didn't know her Sun sign because she cusped Libra and Virgo.

Yeppers, the librarian is a Virgo.
Sun-Pluto Virgo (on my Moon), trine her Capricorn Moon.

I showed her 'how' to sign up for an account at astro.com. She followed everything I had to say. She didn't know her birth-time, so she'll sign up at a later time. She couldn't access her BC right now because it's in a storage box. She's buying a house and moving-in in the next few weeks! All her things are packed! ...

(Universe??????? Everyone ELSE but me? What up with that?????? LOL)

So, she'll probably be my teacher for more of the refresher classes. I'll follow up with her on her astrology interest.

Neptune sextile Venus. I'm having a REAL meet-your-soulmate potential transit. And I hope it would be a commitment for the rest of my life. That's part of the Promise with it. I'm looking for Love that never quits. Aspect remains until Feb 2018.

And, that stuff about Vesta Cancer in the 8th house being frigid? NOPE, at least not with me during my earlier and middle-aged years. You can write me down in the astro books as one of the exceptions to that interpretation.
I'm not sure about now. Been too long. My memories are what's racy.

But I have a fountain reservoir of Experience there, to draw my Inspirations from! I might blush from time to time, but, I Remember! LOL

<cropped before posting, we have no EDIT BUTTON! >

I'm actually feeling very inspired by parts of Robert Hand's Planets in Transit. Can't wait to see his work on Chiron.

I borrowed another astrology book from the library. Stephen Arroyo on Astrology, Psychology, and The Four Elements c1975.

One of the things I think I'd like to dig into is knowing the personal planet combinations better, so I can avoid the mistake he mentions about projecting 'too much' of self into readings and knowing Others. I've been noticing the subtle differences a little. At times I can be right on, and other times I had put too much of 'me' into the reading. I'd like to find the Balance point with that.

Experience is a large part of learning. I might be slow?, but the learning I anchor is thorough.

Fascinating book to read. Lots of info!

(I want to wait for EDIT button again.
I need to take extra-care in communications right now. I feel like this post is a mess! LOL. I just don't want to say something now, that I wouldn't be able to clarify within minutes or a few hours.)

Here's the VENUS Song...
In honor of her retrograde starting tomorrow.

Blessings!

posted March 06, 2017 12:30 PM            

I'm not feeling well from it.

Either from 'it' or from the chronic stress and worries I've had for years and years and years in it now.

They are getting apartments around here ready to receive new occupants.

My nerve system feels soooo sensitive.
My stomach has been a wreck.
Right now my innerds are quaking from sonics.
I just pray for the protection of my body's health right now.
That's paramount.

I don't know what I'll do with all my stuff?
I might have to dump everything I have, if I go homeless at this point.

That's worst-scenario thinking.... but I'm shaking a whole lot today, and I don't know 'what' it all is.

Oh. Rm's sister is HEALING! ... yay. It's a lot better than what they had thought initially.

I hate not having the EDIT feature working Randall. It keeps me from posting here at LL.

I responded to Rubynoir's dream in Astral Realms because I read a VERY disparaging post to her in a re-post she had done in a different section of LL.

I decided to go ahead and POST to her, not realizing that Ra was doing so 'at the same time' as I was. So at least she has TWO Good responses to her post in Astral Realms Forum.

First, I hate posting when I don't feel good at all (I'm very worried), and when I can't EDIT for clarity.

If I can ask for Prayers for my own Health, I do that right now.

Thank you Prayer Warriors.

And Pray that my situation ALL resolves for Good, and not EVIL towards me. I am at God's Mercy.

I LIKE being at LL. I LIKE having a physical body??? (*crying, laughing, worried*)

I have my Volunteer Job tomorrow, and I will SOLDIER my way through that the best I can.

I will pop in and out, maybe do some 'shallow' posts.

Oh god... The Refrigerator From Hell just went ON!...

Rm has HAD the opportunity to 'report' the refridge and have management swap out OUR noisier compressor with MANY empty apartments around us... but he won't do that. It's "not happening to him", so why?, is his extremely detached kind of nature.

I found an old journal entry that pin pointed when I moved in with him. It was a gradual dip in dip out. I had been homeless at that time, and frankly, ready to die from exhaustion.

I moved in Friday evening June 1, 2007.
I kept taking care of him, and his waves of health-events.
It eventually became a sheltered-homeless situation for me.
I say sheltered homeless?
AFTER 10 years of caring for him, I have no benefits from it.
HE himself is in precarious health (from his very bad habits).
All it would take would be one more event (like a mini-stroke that he had had after I moved in). His memory gets erased. I don't mean a hill of beans to his family. I would instantly be 'out' on the streets. I am NOT feeling well, and I would be HARD to 'fit' to a living-situation or the kinds of jobs available based on my limitations?

I'm just sad right now; and worried.

Sorry for a teary post today.
I just DON'T do 'not feeling well' very well?

*laughing at myself here, and giving self a hug!*
*reaching pathetically for the tissue box*

Thank you for enduring all my posts... Yes, I'm a mess sometimes? But I'm a Lovable one!

And thanks for being my Email Contact, Randall. I VERY VERY much APPRECIATE what you do, and that you DO/and did that for me.

I want my EDIT feature back!!!

I might actually have a good physical day in a few days, where I would want to negate this post?

No, but very honestly, this has been a long-term situation here with me. I AM concerned for my health and well being now.

posted March 07, 2017 11:43 AM            

And if I don't answer you right away, there might be a reason, so don't think I'm ignoring you.

The response of my body to sonics here are unreal and surreal! Deep inside, I'm okay. I'm REALLY okay. When things are not rocking-out in my physical environment, I do very well. Thing is, my body betrays me? *heart*

Maybe too?

Astrologically, with the Full Moon Virgo coming up conjunct my own Moon, and with tChiron in Pisces DIRECTLY in opposition TO my own Moon, I am experiencing maybe MORE the physical realms of things? And certainly my deep emotions are stirred (while I tend to hold things down soooo deep within me). Perhaps a result of all this purging and stirring will BE the miracle of health? ... I hope I am Restored back to Health soon-- purged from extremely sad memories I've held deep within, as I understand the role that emotions and repressed things have ON one's physical being. ... Thing is, knowing where the line between more-emotion and more-physical are divided; and CAN the body withstand things from long-term.

(Jehovah Rapha, The Lord that Healeth Thee)
(I have asteroids Rapha, and Raphaela, conjunct my Moon Virgo. In God's Beautiful Wisdom! ..)

I guess there's been (and is) a toll I've had to pay in order to keep a roof over my head. I guess it cost me my health to stay alive? ... ~uh, does that make sense??? ROFL!!!

Probably not, but it's just weirdness. And even though sound can heal, sounds can also take a toll in this body's life essence.

I can Create bliss in my deepest self with the heavenly-choirs of the universe bringing me their inspirations within... while modern sound-systems now 'concentrate' the sonic waves so as to enhance regular-hearing people's experience.

Sometimes, because this has been so longterm, I almost throw in the towel, to concede that I have become collateral damage, the unintended-victim of new technologies.

They wait for damage reports (which for some people are their actual health and years of tolerable life on earth) before making improvements.... when they should have actually DONE their research more thoroughly and careful so as not to cause health-consequences to people with more delicate and refined nerve systems.

Of course, I probably wouldn't be saying all this had I had an abundance of finances where I could have been in a MUCH different and improved environment when my health began to feel affected. I know that people may have commented, 'just move'? But you have to plenty of money and resources to do things like that! And a circle of friends who Support Life and give from their surpluses without ever minding. ... Yes, Wealth comes in all kinds of forms. You need Humans who CARE in your life too, to make it ALL work out to its Best and Highest.

So, today is the anniversary of Paramahansa Yogananda's final exit from his earthly body.

I always remember it, because it comes a few days before a grievous loss I had as a child. Actually that loss, on March 9th, 1963, of the patriarchal hub of my family (paternal grandfather) spelled the beginning of the final endings of 'my family lineage'. Due to blended large families in those days, he was one of 24 siblings!-- Brady-Bunch style! But the rural farms needed to be able to breed their 'help' in those days! LOL.

He had an April 21 birthday (0-1 Taurus). He was an extraordinarily handsome man, with great charisma, and unusual body-strength (and eye-hand coordination) in a man. He had been born in the very early 1900s. They say he died from a head injury he had had while working on the industrial railroad systems. It showed up late, as a brain tumor, that was fast.

My immediate family had JUST moved that November, 1962. The diagnosis must have been made in December. My dad's dad died in March.

One of the unfortunate lessons I had gleaned during that time, was from watching the relatives deal with this STRONG man's apparently weakened and vulnerable state of body. They thought it was 'shameful' that he was needing help with toileting.

They put actual awful shame on him-- instead of realizing that this STRONG man they all relied on for leadership, was actually a mere flesh and mortal human being, and not the Super LumberJack he had renown for being in his well-days.

http://www.astro.com/astro-databank/Yogananda,_Paramahansa

Cosmic Chants
I may go far, farther than the farthest star, but I will be Thine always! Devotees may come, devotees may go, but I will be Thine always.

I may bound over the billows of many lives, forlorn beneath the skies of loneliness, but I will be Thine always.

The world may leave Thee, while engrossed with Thy playthings, but I will be Thine always. Thou mayest take everything away that Thou gavest me, but I will be Thine always.

Death, disease, and trials may riddle and rend me, and yet, while the embers of memory shall flicker, look into my dying eyes and they will mutely say, "I will be Thine always."

My voice may become feeble, fail and forsake me, and yet, with the silent, bursting voice of my soul, I will whisper to Thee, "I am Thine always!"

~Yogananda

(music) I Will Be Thine Always (Yogananda, musical rendition of Mukunda St) [6:06] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i06VtaWg5hE

It's all about God! .... and one's Heart devotion and consecration to the things that are Holy.

We Ascend.

(music) There Is None Like You (Lenny LeBlanc, lyrics) [3:32] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KnhUh2tt97Q

oops! omg, I Gotta GO, or I'll miss the bus to my job! I didn't do my 'usual' studying this morning. I usually look over the manual thoroughly before starting.

posted March 08, 2017 12:17 AM            

I had a great afternoon at work. Phone screening is getting easier for me.

The boss asked me if I'd do her a favor, and pose with her in some photos they were taking, pretending I was her client. They are putting together some grant materials to fund the programs (nonprofit).

I was dressed in my beautiful red wool suitcoat jacket, and had on a tricolor metallic wide necklace I wore when I used to work in executive offices.

I actually saw the TV character power attorney "Diane" wear that same necklace in an episode of 'The Good Wife'. Every time I see 'Diane' I love every single thing she wears. I would look good in each one of her outfits!

I recall a time in my life where I wore those kinds of clothes... My Venus Taurus can spot Quality a mile away!-- even at the thrift store where I found the deep Beautiful red suitcoat, maybe hardly worn at all. The color is stunning. I had a scallop-necked purplish-magenta top underneath of it, and the contrast, with black slacks and shoes, looked top-drawer!

Step by step!

When I got home, I was curious and checked a few asteroids, as this was very uncanny to go to work and find yourself being asked into a "photo + opportunity"?

Transiting 15 Eunomia-rx (one of the legal asteroids) was exact-conjunct my 443 Photographica Leo 28.52 and 39382 Opportunity 29.48 LEO--- all in H9 (one of the legal-matters houses).

tUranus in Aries 22.25 is conjunct my 65489 Ceto 22+ Aries (photography and optics), in H4 (work environment).

tPhotographica in Taurus 21+ e.o. H5 crossing over cusp of H6 (jobs, my volunteer service).

In sum, they surprise-asked {t-Uranus} me to be photographed with my boss for work-environment themed pictures?! *smile*...

tUranus Aries wide trine natal 'Photographica-Opportunity' Leo?

Correction -- in regards to my having mentioned an asteroid Rapha? There IS no asteroid Rapha. I have asteroid 8545 McGee there at 28+ Virgo orb 4a conjunct my Moon, instead.

A number of years ago when I'd done my research on asteroid McGee, my mind had associated the name McGee with Rapha Healing Center. I owned a book by the author Robert McGee who wrote a book on healing trauma, with an associative link to a place called Rapha Healing.

The healing center program he ran utilized a treatment modality that included a mix of (a good solid approach to) psychology with Christian-faith to aid in process of healing recovery. It was very controversial to mix psychology and faith in those days.

Now, the missing element would be to incorporate astrology + psychology + faith + types of Fine Arts, into a recovery program? Or how about just have it available in general communities, not so much for any kind of illness-focus, but to enhance and tone the being of a Whole person generally? Sharing with others who are like you, or different from you for the contrast? Expanding who we are, and what we think we know about each other.

Changing the subject...

I ran across a version of a song I was used to hearing sung by a female voice, Roberta Flack. But this rendition has a male voice instead. Cool to listen and feel the effects of the swap in gender, with lyrics adjusted to fit.

(music) Killing Me Softly (sung by Frank Sinatra) [4:33] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8tbP3f3i03E

*Prayers for Inner-Stillness and Blanket/Harness of Self-Control to Cover People right now, with the news I've heard*

Though Evils be unleashed...
'God Is Still In Ultimate Control'
Dispatch Angels...

Stay Close to each person, as we keep watch and tender Care over one another--

We ARE God's Arms extended through our own human form.

posted March 08, 2017 02:04 PM            

I may have met either him (or Mr. Lerner) in the 1970s in the Cayce library-- I was curious and asked what he was researching. Seemed a bit irritated that I interrupted him. But I had no interest in astrology then. I think both of them had done some work there.

I'm going to add this link to something I wrote in a different forum, that delves deeper into the story.
(Personal Readings forum).
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum11/HTML/020382.html

Sometimes, I can't settle on an interpretation of this yukky feeling I have. Is it body, or emo, or both??? (Both, of course, of course.)

I WANT and NEED to do some deeper housecleaning today, and, I feel so heavy, like I need to nap-- (but there's no way my mind is going to shut itself off! LOL) I LOVE being busy!, being active!! I don't do physical limitations well? awwwww.
Patience there, patience. *self soothe*

Sonic-vibeys preclude invitation to rest in my room. Really, it's NOT as bad as usual, at all! It's just that my sensitivities are super-ramped right now, too. I acknowledge both.

I try to go out and walk every couple of hours, to move the body in fresh(er) air! Go see the turtles, ducks, and birds that hang out at the retention ponds.

And really? the only 'rest' I get is when I can 'distract' myself INTO being interested in things online, when sonics go over the top here.

(humor) Of course too? it doesn't mean that if I'm 'present' at LL, I'll be making a whole lot of sense??? ... But you can't fault me for not trying! *chomps at bit* LOL

In that Arroyo book?... My chart elements are pretty-well balanced. When I print out copies of my chart, usually 'the missing hole' appears in the Water Mutables. And it was interesting to me in my younger days, that the two BFF's I had were both Pisces Suns?

But even with my chatty Gem, they too were kinda bossy over my personality!!! Lovin' it right now! (Both had March 15 birthdays-- one very musical, for middle- and high-school; the other was a college cohort in the choirs at the music dept).
... I needed to learn to set better boundaries, and not let these walk all over me?! But with the first one, we had a good bond--- We would have slumber parties and could lip-sync ever word to the music album Jesus Christ Super Star, and spent time looking into candle flames and getting all~mystical.

Progressed, I'm HEAVY Fire now, and almost halfway through pr'Aquarian Ascendant. Should I live *ROFLMAO!!!!!!! *drama*
{OMG!!!! you're so pathetic mirage!!!! hahahahah}. I *laughing* SHOULD be finishing with a Pisces Pr'Ascendant at the {normal} end-of-life term.

With tNeptune traveling long-term in Pisces, it's covering that Water-Mutable position for me now, with tCry*on there (chiron, LMAO) almost finishing up, (but it's slow!).

The transiting Sun and Merc are doing Pisces, and I'm coming into some trines with some truly really Beautiful water positions in my chart. I'm going to look forward to that Refreshing?

And putting everyone on notice that we're into Holy Days times again, when my more christiany side comes out to express philosophically, and deeply musically. I feel I'm at my BEST when I am IN my 'worship' and God-energy water times.

I'll have the chance to 'explore' more fully what it wants to reveal to me, energetically, and spiritually. tVenus Aries has some of my ground covered too, with more-mystical and devotional connections.

...

posted March 08, 2017 06:33 PM            

(music) I'm Every Woman (Whitney Houston, lyrics) [4:45] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7_sqdkaAfo

posted March 09, 2017 09:18 PM            

Most of my astrology (and other) books were purchased used.

Actually, I like using books that have been owned before, and predigested with little neat pencil marks and some underlines. Visually makes it easier to "encompass" the written materials. Grok?!

I basically hate it when people use pen to underline a book, or overuse highlighters. Dog-u'ed pages should be declared illegal to sell?!

I've coded some of my astrology books using colored-pencils to draw the little glyphs, and add extra headings on the tops of the pages.

Of course, one of my favorite things is a good subject index, and in the older days they included some great notes with the bibliographies. I'd done a lot of rabbit-trail research work pursuing the 'original' notation an author would quote.

That's a really good way to get into your author's world, and understand the way they think. Oh... It's all just Delicious! When I was in college I was very good at using reference materials. And it was almost "too sacred" to be handling books written from the early 1900s and the 1800s.

When I did my independent research project, there hadn't been hardly any work done on the topic I chose. The librarians took a shine to me. Trusted me with access to areas that normally only the upper-graduates used.

... I was really lucky, and, before my Time, for sure.

Things I solo-researched back then, {{with only one other guy out~somewhere in New Jersey starting to look into those same materials, is what I found out years later}}, actually BECAME something they use all the time now in brain-science marketing and advertising, and even the music videos.

Switch topics.

You know how I mentioned that tVenus turned retro in the Aries part of my chart, and that I had some meta-type asteroids there?

It suddenly dawned on me that earlier parts of zodiac Aries belong to the "constellation" of Pisces. Cosmic Waters!

On that note, I want to do a shout-out to Athens C of MTZ (sidereal), and Sam G (Vedic), for some really well-done videos recently. Such seasoning, support, and loving-strength.
(Another mention for Michelle Knight of UK! Your videos and music are otherworldly breathtaking-- Beautiful Art (inside and out!).
~Hey to Marina at Darkstar.
(There are always more people to mention, but I'll stop there for today.)

I'm going to look forward to having my own youtube account one of these days, after I take my orientation courses at the library. I had gone ahead and purchased a monthly bus ticket in anticipation of taking a rash of courses, get some more familiarity with innovations.

There's a new version of Word out for 2016. The library has it. WordPad almost seems like old Word! It had been 10 years since I used it?

Oh! Today, I had received an email from a website I used to have a membership with long long ago. They have these daily very short newsletters I like very much.

The letter said it missed me? LOL. I wrote them back and said I used to use their materials all the time. (I did, with asteroids, here at LL.) And I wished them very good fortunes for their subscriber fund-drive. ....
.. And you know WHAT??? They responded, and gave me their full membership pass, for a YEAR! {{ty!!!}}
.. That was a GREAT surprise for me. I wasn't expecting it at all!
They have archives I can access now, for research on the asteroids.

Today, actually, was a normal'ish GOOD day around here, so 'sonics-overdose' was 'at rest' (thank GOD!!!), and with the lowered-stimulation, my nerve system corresponded Beautifully! That really helped my morale today.

And there was an older Spanish lady I saw in the dollar store, who came up and gave me a very sweet kiss on the cheek and a soft hug. How Beautiful, and touching.

Keeping my Balance now. Hoping my head (and the rest of me) gets to catch-up.

posted March 10, 2017 05:07 PM            

hmmmmm.

But, I think they would have caught ON to me soon enough, Randall, when they'd keep having to re-order astro books I borrowed?

I'll keep protecting my good standing and reputation in the Community.

#I'm not ~fallin' for it! Nope!

I've heard that this Venus retro (with other patterns in play) can facilitate energy flows that create more susceptibility to "con-artists" at this time.

Ladies, pay attention.

(music) Smooth Operator (Sade) [4:17] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TYv2PhG89A

I (and people around my birthday) are hitting a freaky freaky "confluence" of multiple Lilith-type returns (my H12, opp my Sun. So Bizzare how they line up mathematically like that!