posted June 24, 2013 03:41 PM            

When we work together collectively to serve each person's unique need individually, then we all reap and celebrate success as a "whole."

Sometimes the acts of random kindness we do, that we think are invisible and not noticed, can have far-reaching impact on our community and world.

As we apply wisdom and strategies, using common sense principles and resulting concepts, (as this man in the video), then our efforts rise up from the Local level, to seeing relief on a broader scale.

Building on small wins and successes, we can step back and objectively visualize the overall practical solutions. Wouldn't it be so wonderful to be able to make that kind of difference in Our World?!

Each one, reach one. One small step leads to strides for goodwill and for All our kind...? Reach out to someone, and in some realm, you affect the Many!

Butterfly Wings! http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=butterfly%20effect

May we come to win solutions to the problems in this World through Goodness, Kindness, Caring, and Cooperation....

Let us generate Healing for the individual, the classes, and the masses....... Be The Change, and MAKE it So!!

VIDEO ----------

Making it Happen: Guinea Worm Lessons Shape Malaria Strategy

In 2008, CARTER CENTER staffer Adamu Sallau Keana saw – literally -- Nigeria's last case of Guinea worm disease.

Today in THE CARTER CENTER's Malaria Control Program, he is a member of the team tasked with preventing the mosquito-borne disease that kills an estimated 300,000 or more Nigerians each year.

posted July 14, 2013 03:21 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Randall:
Pay it forward.

---

Randall, when I saw your response a few weeks ago, it stuck in my mind!

You recall how I was challenged with some emergency chores on the home-front that kept me away from the computer a while?

I started to become discouraged and frustrated.... Thoughts like maybe I was denied a satisfying life because I had more karma to pay. Essentially, all my work was because I was 'Paying backwards'...

My mind flashed on your response, Randall --> Pay It Forward!

Wow! hey...

That's when a new realization hit me.... I got a different sense that maybe I was NOW working towards a Future, and not 'paying for the past.' ...

So, Randall.... See? Sometimes, we never know the good that our kind word can do without our realizing it!

posted August 08, 2013 04:04 AM            

I appreciate your note sooo much. Thanks for caring and explaining that to me, okay? That was sooo very thoughtful of you!

I'm more than a bit frightened about my future... And I'm very sorry if my tension is showing up more and more. Guess it becomes harder to hide. Am so disappointed on top of being scared.

Keep your fingers-crossed with me! So nice to know that you're 'with' me in the spirit! Your sharing means a lot to me.

Had to do a lot of big 'housecleaning' stuff today (er, yesterday)--, so I missed out on posting while all that was going on. Plus my roommate is here off without pay (complications on the job) and has been terribly 'underfoot' in the midst of all my cleaning & packing!! (semi-grrr )

As the end grows closer (right now is Aug 31), it may be that I'll probably have less time to be on the net...? then total nothing. (I hope help comes soon")

"The Slimelord" set it up the legal that my roommate is evicted "if" I am still here. He'll be 61yo on Sept 2, and he's been IN this apartment for 16 years! The slimelord has NOT offered him a renewal yet, pending on my leaving.

I had my own apartment down the little street here for a year, then came to be with this roommate for ~5-6y(?) I've been unsure of 'exactly' when I came to be here because things have been soooo churning and confused--

Did you happen to see the post I deleted describing the fraud concerning that? It was under Looking for 2 Mods in H&He

NEPTUNE has been Transiting my 3rd! since 26aqua, and will be there till 2+Aries).

Anyway, I'll probably go peek around some of the threads right now, say hello, and get a general feel of the community for the past day.

I was able to use the Notification URL to beam-in directly here... Nifty idea!

posted August 10, 2013 11:55 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Randall:
Think about the answer, and you may sometimes find unfortunate events to be Blessings.

---

Randall, I saw your first question the other day through email link. Didn't have time to answer it right then, but your comment was the most forward thought in my mind while I ran errands that afternoon.

"What is this situation trying to tell me?"

OMG, at first my GEM mercurial mind dumped out a whole boxful of answers! Covered wide range emotions and feelings.

This post could go on for pages and pages and pages... But I think I tagged a theme running through my life, illustrated through the mythology of Ariadne (asteroid 43).

Wonderful work of Brian Clark, "Ariadne: The Labyrinth Of The Soul"--> Authentic Relationship.

I got separated from 'my Center' -- my Soul needs to unite back with original plan, which derailed when I made others' needs to feel more important than mine.

I have to learn how to define my own personal needs, separate from another person.

posted August 11, 2013 05:14 PM            

quote:

---

You are on the right path. Don't fight it. Branches that resist the wind break. Bend with the wind instead. Follow your heart without fear.

I hope I don't sound like a fortune cookie. lol

---

Randall...! If your offers of kind words were only 'just a fortune cookie', then, uh, Dude?...... I've got some really 'bad news' to tell about your recent cookie!--> It just got totally-crunched into smithereenies by a 'Jaws-of-Life' hug!!

I know and realize that what you have said is Truth! Thankyou for this 'reminder'....

FORTUNE-COOKIE: The Ear yearns to Hear What The Heart Already Knows...

posted September 09, 2013 06:51 PM            

:( I feel so isolated right now... My roommate was home all last week (I couldn't get good computer access time...) Today he's back to work.

RE Apartment... AND Neighbors with subwoofers and 'earthquake rumble' speakers.

Roommate got an extension for my stay here, by going 'month to month' on the lease. (Roommate says I must decide by end of October, now.) I'd rather leave here. Being here is sorta 'toxic'.... physically and emotionally, (in the physical building, and by the dynamics of the non-relationship I have with him. Stockholm.)

Health-Factors....
The distractions here are affecting my body's physical health (and my emotions, because this all upsets me so much)! I'm living with awful loud mechanical sounds (honky ancient-ailing compressors, even high velocity vibration in the concrete slab & the shaking rattles cabinet doors... sooo disconcerting). My rib-cage (diaphragm) feels like it stiffens and tightens at times from all the overstimulation. Can't get good breath from compressions... makes my stomach flurry and feels nausea. Equipment rhythms can speed my heart rate without my realizing it-- Seems I unconsciously "match" my breath & heart rate (?parasympathetic autonomic nervous system(?)... Mentally I must RESIST "interpreting" the reaction as 'anxiety or panic'... If I am AWARE of WHAT'S HAPPENING to the body, I can compensate by re-referencing the experience in my mind. I can stay within a wedge-area of control.... but I'm sooooo exhausted and depleted now lately.

Earlier, the vibration had the feeling of 'wheezing' in the bottom of lungs. I stopped what I was working on, became 'aware' of the feel and it WASN'T wheeze AT ALL... it was the literal shakey 'vibes' from equipment being used somewhere under this roof. Can be 'mistaken' as a body ailment, but this was OUTER body source, NOT my own physical being.

(Not cool... I don't want my 'mind' interpreting OUTER-source sensation as 'sickness' operating IN the body, and BY the body. I WONDER how many parents are making their children ill without realizing it. Energy medicine is "energy".... SOUND and VIBRATION are used as healing agents.... but how many people are getting sick because of 'miss-perceived' sensations to the body. "Signals" back and forth from brain to bodily glands 'creating' real conditions when what is perceived is from FALSE source.
*sigh... tsk! my body percepts... is such a delicate flower, yes?*

I noticed it earlier when I started this post reply. When neighbor was playing games on video (without their using their OWN private earphones), the sense-surround became a form of anguish. My exhausted body reacts to the sub-aural pulsings~~ half-felt/ half-heard mixy-phenomenon~~ I must keep up a 'vigilance' all the time........

My nervous system has been soooo harassed by the Resonance (compiling and compounding of the separate events into synchronized waves and beats~). I've dealt with it for a handful of years..... and now, I'm "raw" and it is tiring out.... electrical, muscular.

(Saw the MOVIE "Life of PI" a few days ago..... oh god!, yeah it can emotionally feel like that!)
__________________________________________

RE ITEM: Contact govt constituent services.....
Contacted the office, went for interview. What he said sounded soooo promising. The caseworker said he would help resolve the "dropped ball" problem from back in 2006, and get my life back on track. I wasn't interested in "blaming" anyone! I just needed "resources" that I had been deprived of. HE NEVER CALLED BACK.

I have called several times, polite, nice, patient, always wanting an update. HE 'continued' not responding. HE NEVER CALLED BACK.

Yesterday, I came across several old binders full of correspondence.... I FOUND All the papers regarding the corrupt local agency, and the foul that had been committed on me through local NFP. I read the letter I got back from my legislator. He was trusting that his caseworkers were handling the situation for me. (I love this particular legislator.) The legislator mentions two names in the body of the letter. ------- (Ready for it?????? :looking: ) ONE of those names IS the NAME of the guy (caseworker) who NEVER CALLED BACK.

:mountain1:

Today, I called and called and called people.... It's like I get the SAME "sudden reaction" when I get to a certain point.

Sad to discover a few weeks ago that a Woman named Kelly died a few years ago. She was my 'living witness' of what has happened to me 'in the system'.... Time for me to drop it, I think..... Drop the fight.

She had run a Nonprofit here for 15 years then left the state. It angered her that I was 'not' ALLOWED the Resource Help that I was uniquely QUALIFIED to get! Before she left, she told me the man's name...

She had asked him why I wasn't getting 'included' in the grant-program.... He arrogantly told her that "I don't like her!".....

This infuriated Kelly. She told me that "voting" for people wasn't even "legal" to do, much less deny a person who was suffering (on/off the streets) and CLEARLY eligible to receive. I am an intelligent person who had some very very bad things happen to her, which destabilized my OWN ability to help myself then. An additional two years (to the two already) was a crime!

The Grant guideline was NOT based on a 'personality' contest, but on whether you met the parameters. I was DENIED, and deprived of "using" every 'component' of this grant to catapult me into self-sufficiency. Restoration.

I was NEVER out to "harm" ANYONE'S reputation.... ( you all know me~~ I got a mouth, and get playful, but I'm 'harmless' enough). I JUST WANT to have MY LIFE RESTORED!! I just want to LIVE and CONTRIBUTE to life as a "good" human being.

..... I just want a "normal" life. I don't want 'help' from a system. I am not a specimen in a zoo. I need some buddies to help 'bring out' the gifts that are already in me.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.... I need some strong moral support.

I wasn't asking for "people" to be physically involved UNTIL RIGHT NOW. The 'government-system' that was 'supposed' to help has abandoned and/or neglected me.

I DON'T NEED THE GOVERNMENT! I need just a couple of caring persons for eyes and ears and connections 'on the ground'. I am worthy of help 'outside' the government-box.

My personal legislators seem to have no qualms about contacting me and asking ME to 'volunteer' my own time.... for THEIR 'grass-root' efforts~~ HOWEVER, I find that they themselves cannot even give me the COURTESY of letting me KNOW 'what's going on'? They GAVE ME PROMISES THAT THEY HAD NO INTENTION TO "KEEP".....

Maybe they were "so sure" of my vote that they cast me away?....... hmmmmm. Makes me want to CHANGE POLITICAL PARTIES and give my VALUABLE energies to electing those who include ME in their "equations"......... I'm sickovit!!

Promises for Forward?...... wha???? NOT for ME?????? Well guess who will NOT BE re-electing them...... They treat me like CRAP, after my giving THEM all my energy.

When I change address this time.... I may be switching PARTIES. :anger:

I would rather that I have a CUSHION of PEOPLE who CARE. People who have others who CARE what happens (to me) can help the energy lean into a different direction.... a POSITIVE direction!!!! I need REAL people right now to STAND with me.

I want a 'normal' life, (safety and stability), to add to a group or team of LIVING people, who just want to 'be a family' and dream and do creative things that will help the world.

posted September 09, 2013 07:49 PM            

I just finished posting something very long here..... Came up with a message to me that I couldn't access the site.

hmmmm.... really sorta curious!

I basically said:

My roommate got a two-month extension on lease. He will go month to month for me until I leave.

Went to those government offices (that I mentioned in another posting) to 'untangle' the mess of 2005-2006..... The CASEWORKER has NOT called me back SINCE 1st week of AUGUST 2013, IN SPITE of my leaving him messages that I need an 'update'.....

Turns out that THIS CASEWORKER I interviewed WAS THE 'actual' ONE who MADE the original miss-step back in 2006. On his job track, he had merely 'switched' legislators.

Yesterday (Sunday night), I discovered THE OCTOBER 13, 2006 LETTER from the 'original' legislator.... He had included THIS GUY'S NAME within the body of the letter as one of two people who were 'supposed' to be working 'on my behalf' back then, regarding the dire problem I had with the agents of the grant.

ASIDE: Background is that I had been 'threatened' to sign contractual papers that were 'inappropriate' and vouchers of having received goods and services that I NEVER RECEIVED... The sly woman 'specialist' said to me that she didn't 'need' me to sign them (she would herself). She threatened, "Do you want to be right? Or do you want to be 'homeless'?" I dared her to write it down. And for-surely, she did. (I kept the paper...) The problem with these people administering this ambitious & WONDERFUL grant was egregiously complicated. The spirit of this grant was very special--- but seems that the usual agencies DID NOT READ IT!! They made terrible obvious mistakes in their interpretation. Established people in the community understood but said nothing. (Some just ignored obvious inappropriate requests.) The host agency just 'assumed' THIS was 'just customary' and mundane like the others'.... It wasn't. The agency HERE ignored the spirit and intention of the grant.... (The 'original' grant-writer passed away about 5 years ago?) This government agency--- uber-heavy lazy, wasteful, monstrous bureaucratic heavy self-looping, self-referencing machine-- "the system"-- Thought itself 'too established', and way 'too important and big to fail'... It still feeds and exists to this day. They re-convene yearly at a resort this time of year to plan how they can consume and run the 'job of having a job'--- they cannot serve 'the people' because they do not "feel".... they only "preserve" and renew their "jobs"~~~ while the intended recipients are "used" to SUPPORT these numb agencies. The 'jobs' TAKE from the Poor... jobs created and paid for by "poverty." Poverty is 'nurturing' their 'self-job creating machine'.... as they vacation and 'earn' rewards.

Other grant recipients decided to cave-in to new WRONG demands... saying it was THE responsibility of the agency to operate 'honest'. Intimidation and Fear. Coercion. My associates were haunted by pain and bad memories... They did not want to do ANYTHING to lose any little comfort they were given, only for it to be taken from them again. They knew they'd wind up back on the streets. They acknowledged the problem, but from their lessons in poverty would not 'back' me.

I was soooo overwhelmed~~~ I could scarcely communicate. WHY didn't SOMEONE 'try' to pick up on my clues and to INVESTIGATE what it was that I was "trying" to say?? They 'dropped the ball' ~~ and I was 'punished' unjustly for choosing to 'do the right thing'... But I would have NEVER been able to HAVE PEACE with my Soul had I capitulated and lied to myself about their wrongs. November 2006. Anguish...) [end of background note]

Back to Present Time.... Well~~ NOW I believe I do KNOW "WHY" he never called me back! Ends up that "HE" was the person at-fault for NOT investigating my problem, in 2006. It was HE (and his partner caseworker) who had "dropped the ball" and the incipit where my life fell again into harsh bodily suffering and obscurity.... SEVEN YEARS AGO... almost to the day.

I was sooo physically sick, and emotionally demolished by 'what happened' then... and what lingers now. Life became a greater Living Hell because HE didn't take responsibility seriously. He could have STOPPED the fraud that 'happened' back then. Also complicates situation for him, that a close "FAMILY RELATIVE" heads/runs/ has influence with the Local agency involved now... (Caseworker told me this in a moment during the interview... before he (or I) discovers that HE was "the one"...)

How about THAT weird strange 'coincidence'~~ Wow, it's like weird reverse-E.S.P.! This was very wide "Fate".... Imagine! to walk into the office and unknowingly come face-to-face with a stranger who ends up being 'the one' who was 'responsibility' for part of what I've been through, after ALL these years!!

Such amazement!!.... incredible how the Universe pulls it all together--- Isis mending her broken pieces... How UTTERLY amazing and deeply deeply humbling! Makes it all seem so 'doubly-wrong' now... (It's so deeply sad that it all took soooo much Time.) ...what questions! my Soul has!! questions,..... and Wonder.

Nobody was talking to me.... There was a "reason" for that.... But I was totally in the dark about what was going on.

CONSEQUENCE, is that "THEY" have just "lost" their Vote---- from ME, in the future!

DECEPTION......... Deception by the EXACT people who COULD HAVE STOPPED IT ALL back then.... Back 7 YEARS AGO had they had the chance to investigate the TRUTH behind the story I told then. I was 'ignored' perhaps because of their bias. I was very shaken-- then, and now.

These govt fraud workers would have been 'caught' right THEN! But they dropped the ball! Ignored me. The legislator's case-workers would have been called the system's 'Heroes' for stopping the wrongs, and curbing the waste. All those culprits involved in the fraud would have been prevented from damaging (not only MY life, but) the lives of others involved as recipients in the special grants program.

They had ZERO INTENTION to "help"--- then AND earlier today when I "REALIZED" "WHAT'S" been going on!!!

They were just procrastinating, making me believe they were 'working'.... "leading me along" the whole time "my LIFE force" was wasting away, "believing" on EMPTY promise~!!

My body, my emotions got 'spent' for THEIR lies ~~~~~ I feel like Ariadne after Theseus set her up to 'believe' the Hope, then DELIBERATELY does NOT hold up his end of the bargain.

Loyalty was NOT RECIPROCATED!!.... Well neither is my Vote anymore!

(We'll see if my "poofed?" post shows up after I post this one....... )

posted September 09, 2013 10:19 PM            

AS YOU CAN SEE /

Recent two weeks have been high pressure, AND quite revealing....

Reminds me of old theatre plays, where the end 'reveals' are shocker, shocker, shockers!

So many twists and turns.....

You know, I just want to do 'the right thing'.... The action and intention of my heart is to want to help and progress us all past the 'stuck' point. I may not quite fully realize 'how' I'm right, but I love and desire Truth to dwell in my Inner Being. I pray for Blinders to come off my eyes.

If my Soul chose this path, I hope and pray that I have not disappointed 'my Self' and Purpose.... ! The other day, I prayed and ASKED God about 'whatever' Soul agreement I had for this.... I asked God if it was possible to cut me some slack for the remainder of my life. I was afraid I would 'ruin' this lifetime, all that had been accomplished. Is it wrong? Is it wrong to ask for some pastoral comforts rather than harsh jagged wastelands without another soul in sight?.... (Nevertheless, not my will)~~~~ [o go ahead! call me an overachiever, or whatever~~~~ *laughing*] (Hey, come to think of it? Even that old biblical Soul named JOB got a restoring 'break' at the end of his earthly journey, right?) (And 'Life of PI'.... even PI gets to tell and 'write' his story!)

(May God save me from my own stupidity~~ yeah, what a mess, and yet, What A Love!)

(music) What Wonderous Love Is This (Fernando Ortega) (Christian) [5:01] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Hj1Y__cYeg

posted September 10, 2013 06:17 PM            

Yesterday, in the process of writing the posts above, the Truth really started getting VERY clear and realizations sinking in..... I am soooooooo relieved. Like a storm is finally over..... Storm of perhaps at least the past 11 years.

Whether or not someone was to blame or not blame, that someone dropped the ball or didn't---- THAT wasn't 'important'....

The Most Important "resolution" is that I No Longer feel "strung out on the Line".... "Waiting" (too patiently!)

I feel badly for the young man involved. Watta Mess!........ All he would have needed to say was "oops"..... That's ALL!

Gosh, This 'state' I feel is soooo much better now. I'm not hanging on the line "waiting"....on a dead (non-connected) communication line.

I've got bigger and better Visions ahead of me. Case is Closed. Issue resolved.

Next?!!

Blessed..... so Blessed!