posted January 19, 2020 02:38 PM            

I almost dropped-out of high-school towards the 2nd half of junior year. I had become sooooo freakin' bored in classrooms where other students were conniving on purpose to trip-up and interfere with the classroom teacher. Being a student and their peer, I was hearing them discuss their plans, and watched them all participate in it.
Interfered with my Learning! LOL!
I was bored, and angry at them for doing that to the teacher (and, to me). Couldn't do anything about it-- (sat there 'knowing' how deliberate they were at duping the teacher). So mean. tsk!

Then ONE DAY???, I had "had" it!!

Made the sudden decision to 'bag' my classes.
After homeroom, I'd go to the Library to study,
then in the afternoons after lunch and study hall,
I'd go to the band room to practice piano.
Last period, I'd go to Choir every day.

The bandroom teacher didn't realize I was on the lam. He invited me to help him with doing some voice-overs for a video history project he was working on {which I had the voice-for}; he was also a classically trained pianist, and loved to play me his latest pieces. He liked Ives!
Last class each day (5 days) was 'Choir'.
I lived for being in Choir.

Longer story shortened--
My friends had 'heard' in other classes about how the administrators were observing my patterns. They were "confused" because I was UTILIZING my time to "study and learn", rather than go to the hamburger joint to hang out with the juvies there!!
My friends 'warned' me of their plan to capture me-- told me where to go so I didn't get snagged.
I followed my Creative School Study Plan for an ENTIRE week!

They caught-up with me. Was taken to vice-principal's office (it was a mega-sized public school). I was told I would be "punished" by their taking away "Choir" from me. I stood up, and formally announced that I 'quit' school. My mom was there for the capture that morning, and she told the VicePrincipal (he was wrong) by retorting, 'I told you so!!'.

They cut a deal with me. IF I agreed to stay in school, then I could go to my music classes. AND, I would have to serve detention after school EVERY single day, PLUS go to summer school over those months for each subject I had 'skipped'.
~duh. I was an 'A' student.

Wound up being revered by the delinquents in the school (for being cool for what I did, and having to spend the MOST time in Detention than any of them), AND respected by the EggHeads, the 'smart' kids, whose GPA I had TOPPED the years before.

The Principal of the school saw me passby in the hall. He shook his head, and said something similar to the adage of 'When I was good, I was very very Good, and when I was bad, I was Perfectly awful'!!!
Equally good at being best-student,
and equally good at 'being bad'.

Yeah.. So. I 'got into trouble' for all Right Reasons.

*~
Trying to breathe here..
The early morning hours were very good and without *sonics*.
At 8:30 a.m. they 'switched on' their Powerful surround-sound equipment.
I checked myself... I had had some rest overnight, and I was a step-head. Thought, yeah, I Can Do This.
At 8:40 a.m. A headache began. {kind of discouraging, but was keeping up my spirits.}
At 8:45 a.m. A migraine ensued. Everything I saw and heard got a glistening to it.
By 9:15 a.m. The pain started...
This place was (and STILL IS) shaking-down.

I am experiencing my Ceres-Capricorn-RETURN today.

woot woot.

Sorry if this post sounded shaky~weird or in other-essence strange?
That's a reflection of My World.

All I can do, is hunker the best I can.
I tolerate groups-of-moments at a time.
Try not to think of ANYTHING except "just living" and Celebrating that I am Still Alive, and IN a body.

The pain pills aren't working well today.
(And, just to inform, they don't make me high or anything-close-to-it. It's basically made from caffeine and tielenol.)
The ones getting high are the ones next door, and sharing the wall with my bathroom. I can 'smell' the different derrivatives ADDED to what they smoke in there.
No contact-'highs', either!!

I can do 'that' naturally by listening to music.

Using music, and study, and 'posting' for an attempt at 'distracting' this monster environment. Last night, they lasted to midnight. Lots of people staying there.

What brings *them* pleasure.. brings me torment.
They have acted with complete disregard, even to landlord.
Like my new gen'l-doc had said after she was willing to write a letter to landlord and I told her why not-to-- I am really in a 'compromised' situation (because of their law-breaking social-connections).

What brings *me* pleasure, as far as sensitivities have been over these years.. out of which I have inspired others--
has now defeated me?
sheesh.. I hope not!

In another post this morning, I left this beautiful song.

It expands my Heart.
It's sooo Beautiful.

To My Relationship to the Muse.
She surrounds my life inwardly,
and my speakerphones flood with her Music.

I am grateful to the artist who created this Beautiful Song.
I am awed by the artistry of the video person who put this to graphics.
I am grateful to God-- for having Gifted me musical abilities that have served me over my lifetime-- literally, I wouldn't be alive today hadn't it been for music in my life, through several darker periods I had gone through.
And always, I am grateful that I can have an Appreciation of what I hear--
I'm grateful to Bose for their next even-more Excellent sound-cancellation series of headphones.

I have experienced much 'seasoning' and lived through many Seasons in my life. The Ceres Return is kind of a landmark-- as it precedes an important year-birthday.

(65 e.o. May.. I keep repeating it, so that it REALLY sinks in to my realization and appreciation~~
so amazing to be alive and have seen and lived-through the history of what I've seen.)

haha.
I'm glad that things that are PAST are passed.

Male teacher in that team of high school administrators who snagged me, always told his classes that 'you can't pay me a MILLION dollars to go back to being your age'. It seemed like a 'put down' at that time. Now that I'm his age, I'm just Glad.

Youth HAS its harsh times to have to 'struggle' and live through.

Listening to music, that uplifts the soul--
that has lyrics that feed your mind with words of affirmation and hope-- positive messages; or/and words and music that can help express 'the sads' that you feel, WILL feed you-- your WHOLE life long.

Romancing the Muse
(music) Get Here (Oleta Adams, lyrics) [4:31] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWqg_dS2sL01

*~
Including a video I listened to lately.
This is RICH in Lessons that go BEYOND just music.

Give it a Listen! It's worth it.

(topic) Deke Sharon: "Lessons from A Capella for Business and Life" (Talks at Google, posted June 14, 2016) [47:36] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gB2Teglru-s

posted January 20, 2020 09:07 AM            

Isn't it interesting how music seems everywhere? I've even listened to scans of other planets, and they seem to "sing" (as opposed to just random noise and static). The sounds, which can sound so much like music, relay a lot of information.

And songs and music are so powerful to our psychology, something people trying to control of us exploit. Thankfully, many share just to share themselves and provide a balm to the hurting souls of others, to bond together, or to spread enlightenment.

posted January 20, 2020 12:11 PM            

Martin Luther King, Jr. Day

(music) We Shall Overcome (Joan Baez) [4:24] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkNsEH1GD7Q

Choir practice... How it works--
and the story behind the creation of this director~songwriter's piece. The understanding brings a viscosity to the experience.

(music) I Will Be Your Standing-Stone (MUSE Choir, Melanie Demore) [7:58] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpMW8-Nx4T0

posted January 21, 2020 11:02 AM            

We were HACKED
I have a group of short-cuts to youtubes on my desktop. They have been there prior to the take-over of Dell computers by a company.

Today, I went to click on one of those that I hadn't used in a while. I usually have a routine of what I open first, and that covers up my short-cuts!

Instead of that astrologer's youtube channel, a 'PRO-TRUMP Channel' opened up, with "empty" contents??

I tried it again, just-in-case I had hit the wrong-thing. Nope!! SAME Trumper youtube.

We've had our computer contents HACKED, by maga-supporters?

So. I opened a new tab. Found that the astrologer's youtube channel is still active as 'her' account, and not that empty Trump channel.

Another super-strange thing that happened when I went to 'check' the 'chart' of current sky transits the other week.

I use a particular website, which is usually my first-tab opened for my computer-sessions here.

It is 'automatically' by computer, set to the chart for my locale.

During the House Impeachment proceedings back in December 2019, I had been setting the locality setting for Washington, DC.

This past week, more proceedings were on.
It was Historic, and I wanted to make the 'chart of the moment' and have it be FOR Washington, DC???...

And the computer had "anticipated" that I was watching (Maybe it knew because I clicked youtube Live Broadcast), and would ask for the Chart over Washington, DC.

They 'automatically' had SET the locality to the skies over that area, WITHOUT my having 'changed it'.

Yup!!! "Russia! You must be Listening." Reminds me of a very old rap song from early 1980s.

posted January 22, 2020 02:54 PM            

They increase contentions when they reach IN in a surprise to "violate" boundaries as these did. So crass--- and uninvited.

I was reading comments under someone's youtube vid the other day, on the subject of Saturn.

The person responding to the vid on Vedic change of Saturn to Capricorn. She spoke of her grandparents in light of this. Her comment radiated with SUCH compassion and love. The person was hoping that these changes that medical discoveries could increase the length-of-days for her grandparents.

This young person had SUCH a kind and grateful heart. As I read her words, I was so impressed inside me by the quality of soul this person displayed. Tears misted my eyes.

There are generations (and some social groups) that run on self-only mentalities.

I pray Blessings upon that commenting-person who is a representative seed-member of a group of Beautiful younger generation members.

Blessed are these souls!
Bless their special Compassion to Do Good-- as being 'natural' to their Heart.

Beautiful Hopeful Future Seeds.
May (she) and Others like her--

grow wider with their Loving and Kind influence
and successful earth-based Intentions.

{May their 'grandparents' know, and be very Proud.}

May these Beautiful Souls flourish
and see rewards materialize with their every step.
May they remain with a secure level of Encouragement in the ups and the down times.
May they find themselves among Good and TRUSTWORTHY Friends.

May every Kind Act be reciprocated
in THIS lifetime.

May these Dear Hearts
dwell under a Covering,
under a spiritual umbrella
of STRONG Divine Protection.
May nothing they 'need' be missing from their life to the point of harm.
May they Multiply and be free from too much oppression.

May they LIFT Many Burdens in this lifetime,
and increase the experience in This World of Grace.

May they Blossom. May Grace Abound.

I see a parallel .. with this song.
Some are into 'shallow' spiritual thinking and lofty mentalities.

Those with a Truly Opened Heart will See and Hear
Finding themselves in a Commonality (a common-ally, a common-Unity) with another Human Being.

We are ONE Body.
EACH Part Matters.

Each deserves to be Cared for
in each their required-way.

Be At Peace

posted January 24, 2020 01:00 PM            

I really miss actually being able to do some gardening like I used to. Venus Taurus! I have a Green Thumb!!

I had checked the notification box on that one.
When you bumped, yes, I got a notification. Thanks!

*bump* thread
# Gaia's Garden forum
"Garden and Kitchen"
- http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum9/HTML/001152.html
Also responded.
It's been a long time. I had had some prepared posts, appropriate to subsequent months but got way-sided. ~oy.

Oh! Forgot to check the box on your Birthday thread this year. oops!

Hope it was a Good One!!

___________________________
This older thread 'Good Performed..' is still dead..

posted January 25, 2020 03:09 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Randall:
Yay!

---

Thanks for your "Yay!"! ..
It brought a smile to my face.
I needed that today..

This must never happen again..
Heard the story in the news about the group of Muslim clerics who (again this year) visited, and said prayers, on the grounds of Auschwitz, in Poland--
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Holocaust

Promoting Tolerance, Peace, non-Hatred ..

DATE: "January 30, 1933" --
is the anniversary of Adolph Hitler's installation as Chancellor in his new Nazi Government.

"Upon taking office, Hitler immediately began accumulating power and changing the nature of the chancellorship.
. . .
The parliament passed the "Enabling Act"--
giving the chancellor 'full legislative powers'
for a period of four years---
the chancellor could introduce any law, without consulting Parliament."

ref Wikipedia, paraphrased

It's so incredibly important to recognize and pay close attention to patterns and clues in History.

History is not merely for our 'entertainment' but exists as life-lessons from which we can extrapolate wisdom. History records the achievements, as well as mistakes-made in the past.

Documents-- carefully scribed and preserved even-more-carefully for us, are instruments to make us a Wiser People, and for enabling a Better Chance for future civilizations.

We Can Do Better

posted January 27, 2020 06:13 PM            

Your Progressed Moon will be exact conjunct your natal moon.

You have fixed star Nunki conjunct your Moon.
It's good for being influential in a public position. Even favorable for domestic and family matters. Long distance travel. Gives ability to speak very effectively on matters of business, international topics, (and faith).
.. Read that Moon-Nunki doesn't always work for persons wanting to get married (legal, vs co-habitation)? I don't know.. Maybe that needs more research.

So. I don't have your birthdata. I have a pretty good guess. That Moon-Nunki 'may' be on the cusp of H5 for you? And, you have other good aspected planets in your 5th.
Moon is your Mom too. Maybe some of those things pertained to her, or folks in that generation, or people you grew up with who scripted that attitude on or towards you? (cusp H4/H5).

I'm not as sure of this-- Your progressed MC 'might' be getting ready to switch signs from water to fire, or, it could have made that change already. .. Pr'MC/IC is a very slow mover (and P'Asc axis too). Gradual. In a few more years you might be able to identify the energy difference.

Take time to smell the Roses.
Tell your Mom you love and appreciate her.

Heard this song on The Grammy's yesterday.

(music) Bring my flowers now (Tanya Tucker, lyrics) [4:24] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8g2JcI9bi0

posted January 29, 2020 11:31 AM            

Adding to stories of my past.
- http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum24/HTML/241615-2.html

Yesterday---
I had had the basic foundation of a surreally-pleasant day!

Really, it was what I would call an "ideal" day. Everything!-- so good; didn't matter whether things good, bad, or in-between were present; it just seemed to all be in its Right place. I had such Beautiful Peace inside me.

posted January 31, 2020 09:31 AM            

Nah. It's just been bad in here.
I have been getting one migraine after the other. It's the kind that takes away your sight/vision. One after the other.

Had to go over there twice this week to tell them to turn down the BEATS. Their stuff was on so loud last night it was competing with our TV show.

Rm doesn't say a word.

Been waking up in the middle of the night with headaches now. Rise up to go to the bathroom and it WREEKS of drugs from next-wall.

They were "supposed to have" MOVED by now?
Had heard their lease was up (e.o. Jan/Feb??).

There is NO "moving" activity.

His drug-connections network seems more regular.

Like I said, I had BEEN to the landlord -- he tells them -- then, they sneak it back UP.

I've got the license plates of his 'drug' people. I might go to the police either today or tomorrow....
I have NO WHERE TO GO!!!
THIS has been my home.
I have no friend-connections.

The shelters are violent and have sexperps!!!!!
I do NOT want to be violated, or BULLIED, or gawked at.... or pawed, or pushed, or shoved or scratched by bully-females with extraordinary long manicured nails.

Shelters are not good for caucasions…
I was TOLD.. that THOSE PLACES are for funded FOR minorities, NOT me.

Anyway..... This place is shaking down again this morning.

Another thing?

I went to open an email of someone I get daily horoscopes from in the UK.

SUDDENLY this piercing tone took over, and Windows 10 had all kinds of WARNINGS that my FILES are about to be DELETED if I didn't respond in a matter of seconds. They showed I would have over 200 files deleted, etc.

I IMMEDIATELY shut down the computer, then rebooted it.

I know that ENGLAND is going BREXIT today??

I don't know if THAT was the connection??
Is my computer WARNING ME about BRITISH websites now, being a source of infection????

Anyway. Don't know if "something" is going to CRASH my computer.

IF something like that happens, I'll text Pearlty, and she will confirm, in this thread.

So. ohhhh argh. Another visual-migraine just started. It's the 3rd one this morning since I woke up.

I'm supposed to have a physiotherapy session today.
I'll have to get the bus driver to watch for my stop.
At least I know there's a voice recording that comes on to announce the 'change' of counties. WHEN that goes on, my bus stop is just-past the first traffic light.

Sheesh!!!!!

So again.
My only thing to do .. is .. go visit the police.

They are supposed to be the Good Guys wearing the White Hats in the cowboy shows??

I don't really think they'll be able to help ME, in my SITUATION...
This is the place where my bed is.
Where my things are.

I feel kind of depleted energy-wise.
Kind of a MESS when you don't know WHO or WHERE to turn to for HELP????..

And like you already know....
I give out the Resource List for the volunteer job I have.

There is NOTHING THAT I QUALIFY FOR!!!!
I am NOT the RIGHT DEMOGRAPHICS.

The people next-wall are "recipients" because THEY ARE the Right Demographics.... and they break the law, and get away with it??????? .. {sarcasm, is a stress reliever???}

Oh maynnnn. There's a fight going on there, next-wall.
What's scary is that I fact-know that they own guns.

From the 'smell' of the weed and wafts of bathroom air, I wonder if he's back to making 'accelerants' again. … Hey. Gotta pay the rent, right?

oooooo. fight fight fight....
I feel like a sports announcer??? haha

So.

Gotta try to get self ready, to go to physio therapy.

They moved the police station, so, I don't know where they are anymore? I don't know the bus-connections and transfers to get there.
.. Once I'm there, I'm sure it will be a LONG wait before I get to talk to a detective.

Like that other end-unit neighbor, I had known he was dealing, but, "that's normal" in this 'hood? It was shocking the day that all those police cars lined up in front of our parking lot. They RAMMED down the door in surprise raid, and arrest.
.. Torqued off the maintenance guy!!! He had to replace the door!!!!

Maybe I'll have to wait till next week...
I don't know.....

duh... *smile on face now* I needed to VENT???

I HOPE my computer doesn't CRASH...
That would be SOOO UNFAIR. …

Okay. I feel better.

Just letting you know 'what' is going on.
I will STILL be trying to come back here, and do some 'lighter' postings around LL.

posted January 31, 2020 12:24 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by mirage29:
I went to open an email of someone I get daily horoscopes from in the UK.

SUDDENLY this piercing tone took over, and Windows 10 had all kinds of WARNINGS that my FILES are about to be DELETED if I didn't respond in a matter of seconds. They showed I would have over 200 files deleted, etc.

I IMMEDIATELY shut down the computer, then rebooted it.

---

You did the right thing to shut down. That was classic malware. Had you responded THEN you'd have lost your files and possibly bank accounts and the like.

I'd strongly suggest not going to that UK site again for a long while. Be sure you have Ghostery or Avast or some such on your computer before you do.

And when you try it again, try it from a public computer at the public library. (Florida is a bit too crazy for me to respond to the rest of it, but if their libraries are like most then it's okay if it faces a virus, they have to set things up to handle that given all the idiots who melt their computers with viruses and then come to the library to access the same link that infected them in the first place and thus them, or the dime a dozen malware that can be spread through Facebook, though in the latter case I've known more than one library to ban use of Facebook at their library for that very reason. If it does get messed up then best to shut down and tell a librarian you had a problem. They should be able to fix it up with no problem.)

Many people believe it's only the porn sites that spread malware, but they are so wrong. And a great many religious and new age sites also carry them. This isn't normally the fault of the people who manage the site (other than incompetence), it's just they're popular (like Facebook) and so try to use them to spread...and the religious and mystical sites often just don't have the know how to deal with it, and put more stock in God protecting their site than paying for actual protection.

Anyway, about to leave, wanted to scan the rest of LL briefly before I have to log off.

Sorry to hear of your troubles. The police are very hit or miss. YOUR safety is generally going to be a secondary concern at best (though you can certainly call to complain about the noise, especially at night, though they might retaliate--it's Florida and the reputation there is people just don't think things through before they act, and often act crazy). But sometimes the police will pleasantly surprise you.

Be sure to add in about the drugs (but be careful not to say anything you don't know for sure to be true) as this can spark their greed since any cash they seize in a drug raid is theirs to spend as they see fit (there have been ironic cases of cops using confiscated drug money to buy booze at their station, I kid you not, though of course it was a scandal). The one risk is that they might decide to take the entire place where you live and sell it to someone else...unlikely, but possible (even if they do this may or may not affect your ability to live there).

posted February 01, 2020 02:55 PM            

PJ, I'll take your advice on looking into the antidotal software. I'm sad that I won't be able to utilize UK-astrologer emails in my account, unless the computer has added-protection now? {?Brexit?}

Told my roommate about the recommendations.
(His computer, his decision. ..)

There had been a free astrology software offer I told him about-- Was for a limited time. Since there had been a change in admin passwords, I couldn't load it myself. When I mentioned it, he just sorta.. didn't want to be 'bothered' ..
Didn't get to take advantage of the time-limited offer.
And that was around the time his sister died.
Time went fast.

Oh. I have my own desktop computer still in the box never opened from several years ago.
- There's "no room" to set it up.
- That room is basically unusable, *due to sonics*
- I'm not tech-saavy. .. Teach me to 'do' it, and I can run rings around its use. Make me 'have' to figure it all out myself?, then ahh-- it's too much "right now" to do everything from scratch. I need 'simple' set-up, and 'simple' clean "doing". Utilize the natural talent that flows through my life.

In my astro chart, 25+ Capricorn is a sensitive place.

Somehow in ~mixed-crazy-reality, I hadn't "REALIZED" (visually) that Libra to Capricorn is a SQUARE (when I stare at my chart).
~~ "O'~ duh me?"! LOL {say that phrase fast!}

My self, and others in my particular age group, are having their
"tSaturn 25+Cap square Neptune (r) Libra 25+" transit right now...

Splay of aspects are rich around my chart at that degree.
Including the Moon Virgo 24.56.
And, the Uranus Cancer 25+ H8

A group of us with 'chiron' too.

So. I wasn't ready for it!!! …
Didn't see that coming.
Caught me unawares..
shakes your confidence?

And, in another surreal way,
proves to me that I have an ability to 'sense' these. Wow!!!
It's real! The energies are real, without your knowing.

Ohh Wahooooooo, and yippeeeee.
YES, What a Ride!!!
What a Universe!!

The observing-scientist in me loves it when 'things I've studied or read' get a kind of tangibility-type (in-my-own-life) test, with (my own feelings/emotions as) evidence to anchor this knowledge in?

Just like death, or, a heart-break...
Or a sore disappointment--
If you're a compassionate soul, you can feel the imagined approximate human sense-feeling for what another person might be going through--
But, this is limited, "UNTIL"!

It's limited until 'experience' makes this more WHOLE to your soul understanding.

When you 'personally' have experienced it,
words take-on a newer meaning.

And in these past weeks..
the 'reality' behind what some "religion" people have done and have BEEN doing, with establishing a new "lower moral-bar" on ethics and standards --
awaked me to "what-that" means and has become now?

All of what has been 'organized'...
of any kind, strangely--
finding self on outskirts?

Going Within
Searcher Finder
Every heart-beat
Still
God.

posted February 03, 2020 09:56 AM            

Including url from LLC2.0
"Others here suddenly getting spammed"
PJ Jan 22, 2020
- http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum25/HTML/005594.html

Yesterday while doing research (via google, not yahoo this time), I had come across a website that this computer threw Microsoft Windows *flags* at for breaches in Firewall.

I started wondering if these *flags* are "just" false-ways to scare people into buying extra software protections FROM places we ALREADY subscribe to? {McAfee}

The *flag* yesterday was easily resolved by just clicking-off the open tab.

This morning, (since I had good results from clicking-off tab), I tried my UK-person's daily horoscope email again. --- --- *FLAGS*.
Not-only *flags* but caused my email Server to automatically shut down.

The name of UK website is
{fixed}

If folks from that side of the great-pond pick up on the internet-mention of his name, then, if it applies I just want them to know.

I went to the youtube-shortcut I have of his on my desktop. (Been a listener for YEARS.) I half-expected it to have been breeched {like my other astrologer-shortcut was by MAGA-hijackers}, and, his shortcut is still fine.)
- {fixed}

So....
Sonics have been brutal.
Right now, I feel really dizzy~or~whatever feeling this is.

As I woke up this morning, I'm starting to realize that ALL OF THIS is affecting my mood now.
When 'the body' is soooo affected to where it feels 'trapped' ~~~ there's no way that without outside people "deciding" that they love me and Care .. that I'm going to be able to have any kind of productive future?
I HATE the feeling of being unable to help my own self.
Like I had pointed out over and over again,
there are NO resources out in my locality.
I'm a Volunteer Worker here, and I KNOW what's available and what is NOT.
I don't fit the 'demographics'.
And, my nerve-system and head have been battered and battered and battered and battered. I'm "raw" now. My nerve-system is very "refined".. and.. THIS was 'too much' every single day agitation TO a refined-system.
I have had NO way out.
What I also fear is NOT being able to make enough money to support self. Prices of housing are IMPOSSIBLE. (grin). That's no new-news to people who are 'aware' of the state of the economy right now.

I've been able to exist here because I was able to contribute to Rm's household by my 'presence' and things I do for him. His family, his daughter, will be taking-over his care once ANY-other medical-fail happens to him. I've been his live-in (unpaid) assistant.
.. In 'this' place now... it is NOT conducive to MY health. I am not able to do 'as much' as I used to BECAUSE OF the outside-battering on my nerve-body.

This is it.....
How can I have confidence when I have NO ONE's support, as I 'feel' MORE vulnerable and being more depleted all the time??
My God!! (Okay. I'm starting a visual migraine.. I'm missing parts of the screen as I'm typing this now. .. And this place is *shaking* from the outside of me. ---
.. aside-- the fighting and wildness next-wall yesterday was so bad that I wondered if the woman there was going to call the cops herself?? She's had to call cops on her baby-daddy before.. He's doing 'accelerants' in his weed again. I can 'smell' it in my bathroom... bleh yuk!!! smell, so heavy.. It's like they've taken over the air in my bathroom. It wafts into my bedroom and parts of hallway. *intrusion*… ).

Okay..... uh. I can't really 'see' right now. I'm going to go ahead and 'post' this, without reading it over.

Just letting folks KNOW what's going on with me, 'just in case'....
{oh sheesh, mirage!!!!! }

posted February 05, 2020 06:51 PM            

Lots of charts.
The asteroids literally spelled 'the ends' {Constitution USA#5} from USA's natal beginnings?

"Politics and religion" also emerged with highlighted emphasis throughout this Impeachment Trial. All the way to the 'end' when Romney-- asteroid Conscience was ON his MC Aquarius 6+

I have worked on a handful of charts throughout the Impeachment.

Asteroids, spelled it all out.

wow...
copy paste from what I posted in political forums here
ref. GU2.0
- http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum26/HTML/004605.html

GAVEL …

SENATE "Not Guilty"
Wednesday, February 5, 2020
Washington DC (USA)
Time "4:41": ~20" pm EST
UT Time is 21:41
Sid Time is 1:35 ~:20" {edited}

Washington DC
77w02, 38n54

Leo Asc 7+
MC Aries 25+

I've captured many of the relevant charts and timestamps since 2019.
The asteroids mostly 'said' it all, literally the whole journey through.

tNeptune Pisces has been working at dissolving the roots of The Constitution's Chart... conjunct the "IC" of USA's Constitution Chart {ref astro-databank, USA#5}.

____________
I mentioned Bernie Madoff to Rm yesterday.
I joked about him being freed from his prison sentence.
JUST NOW I saw that he says that because he is a dying man, he requests to be freed from his prison-sentence.
*stunning* ..
- http://www.astro.com/astro-databank/Madoff,_Bernie

posted February 07, 2020 08:53 PM            

Medicare (original) with copay insurance.
The copay insurance cost is RAISED, to eating half my income.

Then received a letter from drug-policy (part D), that yet-another drug I need (for life) is now "NOT" on their formulary anymore. I have two important prescriptions I'm paying FULL PRICE for. {With another formulary change, the cost of NO drug insurance for those two, adds to around ~$200 in one month!!}

I had called the Medicare call-center to ASK for my yearly booklet (which never arrived). When the young woman asked if there was "anything else" she could help with?.. I started to tell her about my pharma-formulary woes.

I had been with that particular drug management/broking company for over 5 years. They've incrementally paid LESS and LESS and less, while copays on what they approve-of go UP.

This young woman informed me that I could switch to another pharma-plan and have ALL (ALL!!) my drugs covered. She asked for the list of any and all drugs I take in a year. She suggested a different plan, which covered ALL my prescriptions.

Before I called Medicare, I had spent a few hours on the phone-- being put on hold, passed to supervisor after supervisor, on that pharma-company I'd been with 5 years! .. The top person reached said she could arrange for me to get a 'temporary-period' exemption, that they would paying for my acidpills. (Nexium is a purple miracle; for decades, NO OTHER pill on the market has ever been effective).

I SWITCHED to a new pharma plan effective next month.

That Medicare young woman ALSO said I (by current income) also qualify for having my COPAYS covered on the state-plan medicaid. That I didn't need the "expensive" private copay insurance.

Next,
I called that copay insurance company.
Had heard a long time ago that at age 65 your premiums get cut in half.

I've been with them since July 15, 1999.
It was a blessing and appropriate at that time.

A friend of mine who heard 'how much' I was paying for my doctor copays, told me about this copay insurance. She used this insurance herself, and called her own agents, to arranged for them to come talk with me.

It was a great deal, and basically at-that-time, the copay insurance "paid for its own self", comparatively. So, my copay money went to the insurance company rather than direct to the doctor's office. As an added benefit, it also PAID my deductibles-- with any copay owed after Medicare paid the ('assignment') bill.

The company has been in existence for nearly the number of years of Neptune's orbit around the Sun.

So TODAY...
I had agents from that copay insurance company come visit me in my home. I lay out all my financial papers on the table for them to see.

The main person (Aries) looked at me after seeing these papers, and said you've been paying us money for YEARS that you didn't 'need' to be paying us.

On his laptop, he started talking about switching me to a "managed care" plan. {HMO}

From my own understanding--
That entails 'selling' a year of your Medicare policy-- and signing those benefits over to a subcompany for a year. It means "losing" your doctors and therapists. It means needing to "START ALL OVER AGAIN" for 'just' a year's worth of time.

Thing is, once you lose your "original relationships" with this "plan"-thing, your "new relationship" is INSECURE.

You keep having to 'SELL your Medicare Benefits' to a NEW plan, each and every year, according to their costs???

The Old Fashioned DOCTOR-PATIENT kind of "knowing the person" and making DECISIONS for them ACCORDING to HUMAN Wisdom from a Healer.. is DEAD?

It's all a 'computer' system now. Humans barely being needed in relationship to interchanges with Patient now.

The computer holds checkmarks of symptoms... which could mean ANYTHING.

In the OLDEN DAYS, your Medical Record "notes" were used as a "memory-jogger" for the humandoctor who KNOWS the patient and has been seeing them for years.

The QUALITY of being a recipient of care.. is.. *speechless*.

There's NO WAY that a "ROBOT" knows what it is to be a HUMAN being-- to be accurately making accurate decisions FOR a human being.

Healing... is done PERSON to PERSON.
A ROBOT cannot "feel" nor have empathy.

God!!! can we become any MUCH-LESS "human"??

Maybe NASA and the governments are getting ready to send a human into space, and sending that human OFF the earth for the rest of their HUMAN life.

A Human, inside their "artificial" little 'tin can' -- where the COMPUTER "simulates" a relationship with them. "Simulates" their being in a good environment. "Simulates" the experience of 'foods', 'pleasures', etc.

Puts a false BUBBLE around the human.
The human is 'fooled' into relating-- as-though, as-if.

So.

The agent (Aries) said he is first a financial advisor/broker by education and previous experience. {Saw that on his resume.}

The younger man (Sun in Pisces) said to me that I need to LEARN this new system because (basically) it's "here to stay."
…
At which point my mind flashed back to what I read regarding my newly developing outer-planet aspect transits. There is much wisdom contained in 'Planets in Transit' book (Robert Hand). The words are echoed by folks who are non-astrological ...

The company man (Aries) said he was going to dig in and do deeper research for me, on the best medical plan for myself.

I told him Nancy Pelosi had mentioned in her weekly briefing that they have a bill sent to the Senate that "includes" vision, dental, and hearing coverage for the Medicare Original plan.

And..
He said too, that the main Company he represents is due to CUT the price of CoPay Premiums in HALF (occurring 1st day of the month their customer turns 65).
That will happen May 2020 for me.

He had been urging me to sell my Medicare for an HMO-Policy. Upon which, I 'told' him a story about my "HMO" experience in the past.

To 'save money', the last full-time employment boss I had, decided one year to change the medical coverage. He opted to give myself and coworker an HMO plan {aka 'managed-care'}, rather than the full service medical plan.

It worked out great for my coworker because she knew the doctor of the HMO office. He had delivered her at birth, and took care of her all through her life, including the birth of her 3 daughters.
For me, I was a newbie to that medical office.
.. I came down with a painful ear infection. Took days to get an appointment. On day OF appointment I showed up, and when it was my time, I was TURNED AWAY from medical services. I was told that 'They had now MET THEIR "QUOTA" of HMO-patients for the DAY'. Said that they didn't HAVE to see me.

I called my boss and told him about that!-- (I think I must have gone to an emergency room for antibiotic I needed to clear the infection.)
My boss (a Taurus) was LIVID at the way I was treated, and he apologized and IMMEDIATELY placed me back onto the Full Service Plan I had had.

*~
So continuing...
The company agent is going to "investigate" various OTHER plans or ways to financially approach this in a way that might work for me.

I hope what Nancy Pelosi said about the planned extensions to Medicare Original will be accepted by the Senate. She sounded as though there was agreement on it.
It's been there... ready to be signed.

IF that 'extension' were to be accepted by Senate, then, the private-copay's insurance policy of CUTTING-Premiums by HALF at age 65 could hold value?

I dunno.

Health Care? .. This involves too-much "haggling" in a BLIND way-- looks pretty on the paper, but 'what' actually does it mean? I'm NOT a "wheeler-dealer" tycoon type.

I like HONESTY in business.
I like STRAIGHT-FORWARD Truth.

'WHY' the LIES???---
People misrepresent themselves on their resumes?
Companies misrepresenting themselves to lure candidates?

Dating..
People misrepresenting 'who' they are to each other?? ..
What a WASTE of time and MONEY-- unless ALL you're playing is a fake game?!

The inception of internet-only wheeling and dealing for discounts, etc??-- have me feeling EXCLUDED.. dropped-off the flat-earth's cliff.
(Can't afford a fancy cell-phone; nor
right now have the ability to afford (nor understand) all the layers and layers of complicated choices and internet fees.)

All this started when my doctor had QUIT (around Thanksgiving).
I was assigned a young woman (a Cancer) to be my new health person.

Zod-Cancer woman had said the words,
"If you were my mother.."
in a decision she had made for my tests.
(She's the one that referred me to the pain doctor, to see if there was anything new that would be able to help.)

Through visit to the pain doc,
I met my physio-therapist (a Taurus) who has been my 'listener' and pragmatic *cheerleader*. He's of the same faith so we have an inspirational and exhorting 'language' in common.

The Medicare young lady on the phone added how much she loves her job. And, how much it disturbs her when "seniors' get taken-advantage of.
..

I choked tears when the Financial-Aries-guy talked about helping me with my finances, the same way he helps his mom.
.. I 'hope' I am not misunderstanding him.

The first-name asteroid of that Aries man in my chart is ON the degree of his Aries Sun's Birthday, H4.

His last-name asteroid is at 1+ Gemini, H6.
His transiting l-name trines my Sun from H2.

I've been needing some Advocates.
I "NEED" to feel the support of people in MY Corner.
I deserve to have the support I need.

My Taurus Physiotherapist said that 'the bird that keeps their mouth shut?, doesn't get fed'!!

Ending my post for tonight.

Exact aspect tSaturn Cap H2 squaring natal Neptune. tSaturn 25+ Cap is same degree as natal Ceres.