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Author
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Topic: I don't think there's anyone honest left out there.
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proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 01, 2002 01:15 AM
Well, that's it.
My roomie, who's girlfriend is in Hawaii for work - the one that he was was going to move out with as soon as she got back -, just had a chick walk into his room.
I mean, he and my other roomie have been treading the line, but I hadn't seen that, and didn't want to believe that, f*ck, someone I know and live with could be so dishonest.
I mean, I know that people act that way - I'm just always surprised when it happens. And it's illogical - something will not affect me in any way, but I'll be really disappointed and hurt.
Ack - I know that this may sound contrived or...whatever...but it's not - I really want to know - Why do people have to do those things? I don't get it. I don't understand.
I f*cking hate people.IP: Logged |
Foxxy
Knowflake Posts: 273
From: Toronto
Registered: Aug 2002
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posted December 01, 2002 02:22 AM
Some people are dumb.
My current boyfriend's last two girlfriends both broke up with him for someone else, in the last case it was someone they had been sleeping with. He just came home and she had moved out.
I'm not like that, my two closest friends aren't like that. but some people are. Emotionally I would say its a reaction to the feeling something is missing in their life, or a response to some sense they deserve something they don't have.
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Oxychick
Knowflake Posts: 2626
From: neither here nor there
Registered: Jul 2002
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posted December 01, 2002 08:00 AM
Or sometimes it's a wacky defense mechanism. It's unfortunate to see things go on that interrupt our moral views....but what we have to keep in mind sometimes is we don;t always know the whole story. Granted, sometimes a pickle is just a pickle (my friend said this to me the other day and I've been dying to say it). I mean, I would be furious too if I saw that, and I think it shows a caring sort of person who feels it when someone else is being hurt. Have you said anything to your roommate, proxieme? ------------------
"What lies behind us and lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson IP: Logged |
Bernadette1216
Knowflake Posts: 504
From:
Registered: Aug 2002
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posted December 01, 2002 10:24 AM
Corri, you just cannot imagine how many times I've asked myself that question. And unfortunately...over the past 13 years of my life when I REALLY asked that question over and over, I've never found an answer. I just don't think there is one.What has happened to our society? Why are there no morals? I mean...why can't men/women be satisfied with one partner? Example, you have 2 people married...they seem happy on the outside...everyone says "Oh what a darling couple blah blah blah" but really...the husband is off looking at things he has business looking at and doing things he REALLY has no business doing. All the while, the dutiful wife is sitting on her side of the marital fence, doing her marital wifely things..taking care of things..everyone in the house is being taken care of by the dutiful wife. She is the cook, the maid, the laundry mat, the cab service, the tutor, the babysitter, the person in charge of car maintenance, the Hallmark store, the spiritualness, the glue that holds this "darling family" together... never knowing the whole time she is fulfilling her own duties as wife, partner, lover and mother that the husband is off in his own world of unfaithfulness...the wife, who has given her whole life, her whole soul and being to the progress and success of her marriage and family is the biggest fool in the world. For she has given it all in vain. And for what? What is her reward? Pain. Anguish. Angst. Anxiety. Weight gain. Headaches. Weight Loss. Smoking. Secrets. Desire. Despair. Anger. Embarrassment. Sounds like a great life to lead doesn't it? I wonder just how many women, when you peeled the cover back, would expose themselves and stand up and be counted that this is how their lives really are? I'd bet it's more than a few...more than a handful...many many more. And it's really sad isn't it? For all women ever want...all we ever really want..is for someone to love US unconditionally...like we love them. But then...what do you do when someone comes into your life, that you feel is meant to be in your life...but there's no way of that happening because of the sense of responsibility and duty that lies within. For what do you do, when you are constantly ignored, constantly being made to feel unworthy of any kind of interaction from your partner, yet this other person is lingering, that you feel should be in their rightful place..which is beside you? Love..it's a very vicious cycle...it's underhanded and vicious and can be a destroyer of many things..unless you control it. ------------------
We are each of us angels with one wing and we can only fly by embracing each other-unknown
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Carlo
Knowflake Posts: 1612
From: Second America
Registered: Nov 2000
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posted December 01, 2002 11:01 AM
you're in college! it's like that everywhere! there is no fidelity in college, it is not allowed! didn't you see Rules of Attraction? omg!honestly, that's just college life. It has little to do with love, respect, or any of the more evolved emotions. I don't mean all college students Corri, but certainly anywhere you look. Gods, could I tell you some stories about my college days in NY. I woke up one morning with the dean's daughter in my bed and no idea how she got there! And that was just the most famous girl on campus. There were many lesser-knowns, and me, honestly, with no recollection of where they came from half the time, and not much interest in making them waffles. In college, you see how much you can get away with, I guess, you push your limits until you either flunk out or come so close to flunking out that you straighten out. Yet faithfulness? By and large, not foremost on most college students' minds... IP: Logged |
proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 01, 2002 11:09 AM
Dude is 26 - he's an ex-Army Ranger. I guess I expected more.But, I mean, seriously - that's my problem that I've got to deal w/ in my own way. I've really no right to got around "expecting" things from people. IP: Logged |
proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 01, 2002 11:13 AM
And he still talks to this chick on the phone everyday like nothing's changed.
Argh.
OK.
I'll quit.Ok, no, wait - he brought this girl to meet his fam; he told his mom that he's going to marry her. And he does this. I don't think he's proud of it, though - in his own mind it's not right; he tried to play it off this morning like both the girls were with my other roommate (who's a 22-year-old horndog w/ no pretentions of fidelity, so - horrible as it is - I just laugh at the girls who drive themselves over to our house for a bang and then expect more). IP: Logged |
Oxychick
Knowflake Posts: 2626
From: neither here nor there
Registered: Jul 2002
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posted December 01, 2002 11:16 AM
hey Carlo-which school in NY was this?  ------------------
"What lies behind us and lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson IP: Logged |
Sher bear
Knowflake Posts: 164
From: Canada
Registered: Nov 2002
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posted December 01, 2002 04:16 PM
Corri,I agree with Carlo that, to some degree it's a learning process we all kinda go through, some people seeing the light, and unfotunatley some may never..(in this life anyways).......I'm more concerned about you, and all that "hate" your manageing to caring around with you..  ....I've been there...I've seen and been through some of the darkest depts with humanity-------many times I sreamed out in disgust and rage----but I don't know, I've some how managed to past the odvious signs of pain - and see the deeper in peoples actions....I mean if life was as simple as just "doing" right or wrong based on the odvious choices, well i don't even think we'd be in this "shell" to learn.......I still do get upset - and I sruggle all day long to do the "right things" but it's not so simple...... Mostly I've tried to stop worrying so much about how other's were living their lives so that
I could examine mine...I don't know how often the phrase "critize other's and reveal yourself" pops into my head...Anyhow, as frustrated as I do get at people, and the world - I've been finding life and it's experiences a pretty wonderful thing.....but......I wonder---will we ever manage to have a place where people don't knowingly, and unknowingly walk aroud hurting each other-----People do "P***" me of a great deal-but, yah, well I've gotta deal with them and myself cause it's part of life......and so yah.....um Sorry if I've unloaded a bunch of baggage unto you...:haert: BlezzingS
Sher bear :haert: IP: Logged |
dafremen
unregistered
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posted December 01, 2002 05:36 PM
Whats love got to do with it seems to be the theme song of today's relationships. I can't stand it, and subsequently, I'm a less than liberal parent. I watch my kids like a hawk, but try to be understanding and respect their privacy too. It's a fine line, but it's better than giving them the message that anything is ok. We treat human beings like this because? I don't know, but I'm doing everything in my power to change it. First by releasing decent, responsible, conscientious folks into society. Secondly by spreading the word in any way that I can. I feel your disgust proxieme, I remember watching my buddies treat girls like that and remember wondering to myself why I still called them my buddies. Then again, I had very few CLOSE friends and currently have none that aren't online. Maybe that's why.There are honest folks out there man, it's just that the dishonest, if-it-feels-good-do-it-no-matter-who-gets-hurt folks have the microphone right now and we don't. Then again, people make mistakes...maybe that's the case here. Experience leads me to believe that it probably isn't...but ya gotta think positive! 8) Daf IP: Logged |
Katiebull
Knowflake Posts: 97
From: Vernon, NJ, USA
Registered: Oct 2002
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posted December 01, 2002 06:04 PM
It's hard to believe in true love and honesty. My entire family, aunts, uncles, cousins included, have all been divorced at least once, have had numerous affairs and indecent happenings going on. Even my grandparents were separated before they died. I also was cheated on by my first husband, who ended up getting a 15 year old girl pregnant. He told me this while laughing in my face, how happy he was that it wasn't me having his child.I still believe that there is someone who is honest out there. Someday I'll find him.
I have to believe it. Kate Honesty is such a lonely word, everyone is so untrue, Honesty is hardly ever heard, and mostly what I need from you. B.Joel IP: Logged |
proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 02, 2002 01:18 AM
Thanks ya'll for responding. It made me feel better about the whole thing (in a way that I'll explain in a minute). Sher bear - yeah, I don't really get like that that often, but when I do it's deep, so there's probably some "issues" lurking around down there that I haven't fessed-up to yet. And, you're right - I've no right or place to criticize others, and I know that - I mean, I don't know what's going on in their heads (or not...haha) or anything about their past experiences, etc. It still (even though I know it may not be right) makes me so angry when people hurt each other thoughtlessly (or worse, w/ plenty of forethought); and I'm no saint, I do it, too - and I'm just as angry and disgusted with my own actions when they veer into that arena.
And (time for my own baggage  ... tv talk show therapist time... ) - the real anger that I feel towards the betrayal of trust is probably in large part b/c of the fact that my parents repeatedly and constantly betrayed one anothers trust and diregarded the feelings of eachother and all others around them throughout their marriage, and 8 years after their marriage ended are still acting like some strange mutants cross-bred from the worst parts of middle-school children and chronically wounded badgers.
But maybe that's it - maybe people act in terrible ways because they're wounded, and act as any other animal would do in such circumstances; so what they need is patience, and love, and maybe some space - but it's so hard to give those to them when their actions are mauling you in the process, you know? Ok, I feel better - thanks Sb. dafreman -
"...just that the dishonest, if-it-feels-good-do-it-no-matter-who-gets-hurt folks..."
THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
I'm cool with people who unknowingly or mistakenly or through geniune human stupidity hurt people (b/c, hey, that's just about everyone by default, right?), but then there are these people that DON'T CARE if they hurt others. It doesn't matter to them. The effects of their actions, in their minds, stop when they get pleasure.
Aaaah.
I know, I know - don't judge, show compassion, but wtf? How can some one NOT CARE IF THEY HURT OTHERS??? I don't get that. I mean, I "get" it - I can predict it - I know that it's there - and I understand the mechanics of the thought process behind it (that being, "Me - yay! Everyone and everything else - well, if they benefit me in some way..."), but I DON'T GET the why of it. And you know, the kind of pure short-sighted cost/benefit analysis that leads to that behavior doesn't work, at least not remotely in the long term.
And, yeah, compassion, I know - and I do feel a sort of weirdo, odd compassion that no one that I know "gets" (try explaining - inarticulately - to "Gary at work" that you love everyone in a way simply because they "are" and watch for varied and confused reactions) - but...ohmygod...I get. So. Frustrated.
And I'm not going on some "holier than thou" rant (it is a rant, just not that kind) - I p*** myself off continually b/c of my actions. Katiebull - What's your age? I have the same thing going on - almost every adult example around me of marriage ended in divorce, too, and most of the people I know my age (kids, b/c @ 22 a person's still a kid in my book) are in the same boat. Oxy & Foxxy & Berns (I'm shortening my reply now b/c I just got back from work and it's 1 AM & I'm beat - but don't think that I don't appreciate what ya'll wrote) - Thank ya'll for your prompt and knowledgeable replies  (to sound formal). Nope, didn't say anything to him this morning after he seemed intent on not admitting that it happened. When I get down to it, it's none of my business, and he'll have to live w/ whatever the consequences may (or may not) be. Dude was calling around frantically today trying to "straighten things out", so hey. (We live in close quarters; I made an effort not to listen...too closely...but guy screams everything he says.) OK. Tired now. Ya'll are too cool for helping me. It doesn't seem like anyone that I know understands when I'm completely dumbfounded by the everyday, by casual cruelty - but ya'll do, so thank you.
I still don't get it, part of me hopes I never will - even if it does mean a few unpleasant surprises. Corri I've gotta quit writing stuff when I'm tired; I'm a total drama queen. IP: Logged |
Carlo
Knowflake Posts: 1612
From: Second America
Registered: Nov 2000
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posted December 02, 2002 02:00 AM
I went to the best college in Hempstead baby  At least that's what my International Marketing professor called it We'd watch Gastineau and the Jets practice on campus, jump the fence to Nassau Coliseum and party in the parking lot at Dead concerts...back when E was called X, the girlies drove their parents BMWs, Howard Jones was their god, Sam Kinison and Jessica Hahn were regulars on Howard Stern on KRock, the Beasties just dropped License to Ill while King of Rock thumped through the dorm...yep, those were the daze aw, I just saw 8 Mile, feeling raw, so I better log off soon gots to cop that soundtrack, whoa!! BB,
Carlo IP: Logged |
proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 02, 2002 10:01 AM
HEY CARLO!!! -
http://slate.msn.com/?id=2074649 IP: Logged |
Carlo
Knowflake Posts: 1612
From: Second America
Registered: Nov 2000
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posted December 02, 2002 10:39 AM
yeah, yeah, yeah...well bust this... http://slate.msn.com/?id=2073647 Dave Samuels is ill. Nas is tight, yes, but this is a *Hollywood movie*, so there is no "begging the question" going on. The Hollywood ending is that Em wins the battle and Papa Doc is left speechless, which we saw coming, yet it was like rooting for Rocky, and I was on that tip. People came out all jacked after, like after Rocky. This ain't a discussion of who is the King of Rap, I won't go there with you. Yeah, so Em isn't Nas...what else, bi*tch (not you Corri, I mean in general!)? this is a Hollywood movie yo, so it's like dat because Brian Grazer (the producer, who also did Blue Crush, my wife knows him) says so, ya heard?! The mic is all yours, ya fly Pisces, now get your college ass up, it's time to show and prove BB,
Carlo IP: Logged |
Katiebull
Knowflake Posts: 97
From: Vernon, NJ, USA
Registered: Oct 2002
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posted December 02, 2002 01:04 PM
I'm 431 years old. Oh...I guess you didn't mean my real age. I look like I'm in my late 20's. I still get proofed at the bars, so I guess this age thing is a big farce. No, I don't drink anything but club soda with a twist when I'm there...alcohol gives you wrinkles.
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Oxychick
Knowflake Posts: 2626
From: neither here nor there
Registered: Jul 2002
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posted December 02, 2002 08:28 PM
*chokes on her white russian*  Er... I never knew that about alcohol...except that it does dehydrate you. But I drink so much water (who says I'm lacking the Water element?)... Proxieme...it's good that you can laugh at it. The outsider often has a better view...
------------------
"What lies behind us and lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson IP: Logged |
proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 02, 2002 08:52 PM
Ohh hells no. You di'n't jus' go there.Eh, I was going to write this great, long yet well thought-out and articulate, neither too self-aggrandizing nor overly modest retort, but my cat's lying on my hand right now and I don't have the heart to throw her off (I can therefore type, but not really click to go find the ammunition that would've been used). So I'll just say this: Dude's name is B. Rabbit in the movie. Bunny Rabbit. Bunny. Rabbit.
bunnyrabbit.
"And whose idea was it to rhyme "pu**y" and "tushy"?" KB - Aw, naw - I was just wondering about the your generational placement (since I saw similarities w/ my own). Oxy - If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at, ya know? Life itself, for all its pain, is just hilarious once you take a step back and look at it.
And then, of course, you have one's own reactions to circumstances - so couched in ego and arrogance half the time; even while I'm saying most the things I'm saying, I shake my head in wonder and amusement.
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Bernadette1216
Knowflake Posts: 504
From:
Registered: Aug 2002
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posted December 02, 2002 10:17 PM
Corri! I'm a drama queen too!!! YAY!!! GO TEAM DRAMA QUEENS!! hehehehhee IP: Logged |
Carlo
Knowflake Posts: 1612
From: Second America
Registered: Nov 2000
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posted December 03, 2002 10:53 AM
how did the movie end?everyone chanting... "B. Rabbit!! B. Rabbit!! B. Rabbit!!" I thought that was a great choice for a name for a mythical Detroit rapper he got it from his moms, so he was just keepin' it real. Come on P, no haters! It's a frikkin' movie and it rocked! Deal with it Peace,
C-Love-Ski-La-Rock
(on-da-mic) IP: Logged |
proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 03, 2002 11:08 AM
Actually, I haven't seen it, so I don't really have any room to talk.
I just couldn't get past the name.
Carlo - Bunny. Rabbit.
Vanilla. Ice.  Corri IP: Logged |
Carlo
Knowflake Posts: 1612
From: Second America
Registered: Nov 2000
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posted December 04, 2002 10:38 AM
well, the readers' letters in the latest Vibe are pretty positive on the article on Em a few issues ago, and he is on the cover of the new Rolling Stone. He ain't going out like Vanilla Ice, either. He is closer to Kid Rock in staying power, and they are both from Detroit, so it's no longer just an East Coast-West Coast thang, you have to include Detroit now. They've both changed things, no doubt, anyway you look at it.313 in the house! Throw your hands in the air! It's worth seeing, I'd say. I was glad to see Kim Basinger in it too I also saw El Crimen del Padre Amaro, wow, that is great! I loved Y Tu Mama Tambien, yet this is so incendiary, the Church tried to get the Mexican government to ban it, you know. Great flick, such a spotlight on errant priests. So how is all this rap and movie talk related to this thread...oh, I've got it...I am just being honest BB,
Carlo IP: Logged |
proxieme
unregistered
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posted December 04, 2002 11:56 AM
Yeah, I'd have to say that dude himself is much closer to Elvis than Vanilla Ice.I haven't gotten chance to catch Y Tu Mama Tambien yet, but I've seen the poster - is that the same kid from Amores Perros? IP: Logged |
Carlo
Knowflake Posts: 1612
From: Second America
Registered: Nov 2000
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posted December 04, 2002 05:52 PM
yeah, same kid...Y Tu Mama was sooo funny, the entire audience LOL the whole movie through it was outrageous I saw some of Amores Perros and didn't like it.Here you go, Proxy, when you get up enough money and are ready to be a homeowner... http://entertainment.msn.com/news/article.aspx?news=108879 BB,
Carlo IP: Logged |
Carlo
Knowflake Posts: 1612
From: Second America
Registered: Nov 2000
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posted December 04, 2002 09:17 PM
Holy turntables, Batman, Em's old house is up to $2.5 mil with seven days left to bid: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=1792227868 do we have enough between us all? fabulous digs to relocate Lindaland to I'm goin' in! BB,
Carlo IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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