posted August 27, 2003 10:36 AM         

I feel that I am ready, like my task is done on earth. It is a long story and it contains so many inner feelings.
It doesn't even feel bad, I am not depressed, I am even very relaxed about it. I am sorry if this is bothering some of you but there is no one I can talk to about this and I did wonder if I even need to talk about this but I was just wondering if anyone else feels something similar.

posted August 27, 2003 12:02 PM         

Lucky you! ( <-- that's my ego envying you!)

Actually this spring I had a spiritual experience that put many mundane concerns into perspective. I felt calm and free and whole and healed and knew that if I died right then, that it would be OK. I never mentioned it to anyone in this way, because people would be upset -- they would mind if I left!! As many would if you did, too, sweet Sylven.

Maybe you are ready for something totally new. Me, I wish you joy and Light, although I know they live in you already.

posted August 27, 2003 01:50 PM         

its been awhile! i missed you.

i know what you mean, and often i do to. the reason i keep staying on is because i love surprises and am too curious to not wait and see what happens.

im a little sad right now but i keep pushing on, cause something interested is right around the corner!

love faery

------------------
where i end and you begin there's a gap in between there's a gap where we meet where i end and you begin
and i'm sorry for us the dinosaurs roam the earth the sky turns green where i end and you begin

posted August 27, 2003 02:04 PM         

You are só sweet dear R.R.R., Lunar you are made of Gold always so helpful and compassionate and Ana I wish you well and happy SOON, HUX! What is the world whithout such sweeties as you? My god! I thank you so!

posted August 27, 2003 03:19 PM         

Your lite will shine for many more moons to come Don`t you know, the world is a brighter place with you sharing it with us?

Cat can take a look at things for you so do take her generous offer and e mail her.

In the meantime, know you are loved and I send beams of white lite and S to carry you along.

posted August 27, 2003 08:46 PM         

you are so loved. i am glad you are not ashamed to cry, it is a beautiful thing! it makes us human to experience emotions! celebrate your vulnerability, for it makes you beautiful like a fragile flower with dew drops on it, kissed by aurora... and the sun will come up. that i promise. you know that you and i are very similar, and i am going through exactly what you are going through. i keep quiet about it because i like to deal with things on my own, i am just that way. i wanted you to know that i feel the same though, because i *understand*. i am not worried about it because i have been through this before, and i know its 'darkest before dawn'. i just muddle through as best i can. ill always be here for you. you know how to reach me.

i always think that no matter how 'negative' an emotion is, its still valuable because it makes us real. you are lovely and loved.

*huge hugs*

you know how much i care because i havent been posting, i dont want to, i want to be 'alone' right now... but i break my silence for you because you dont have to suffer alone... and because i love you my dear friend.

------------------
where i end and you begin there's a gap in between there's a gap where we meet where i end and you begin
and i'm sorry for us the dinosaurs roam the earth the sky turns green where i end and you begin

posted August 28, 2003 02:01 AM           

Sylven, the lessons worth learning are always the hardest to learn. That is what the tests are for

Remember, once a sailor is through the eye of the storm, there is calm. Perfect calm.

to all

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~~Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves~~

posted August 28, 2003 03:34 AM         

i'm so calm right now (the last 6months too) that its kinda upsetting.....i go through the motions but i'm not living...half of me is.....its really weird....its like everything about me is divided into two....i think one thing and say another...and i too wouldnt mind if it was my time to go....i dont think it will be for a long long time...but if it was tomorrow...or right now...i wouldnt mind
i keep asking to get "something" sent my way that i have to deal with....but nothing comes

oh gosh! i'm so sorry! i've gone on about myself....i didnt mean to

you'll get through this....and MANY more things too....and they'll all make you even more wonderful than you are today!

posted August 28, 2003 05:20 AM         

Like Ana also mentioned about herself, I wasn't planning on sharing either, also like to work it out alone but somehow I needed to do this and see how you sweethearts reacted! I don't regret it one bit!

Ana I send you healing lite, love and strength. You'll be ok too! Thank you for your sweet words! I love you too!
Cat I would like to email you and I probably will, don't know when though. Thank you dear!
Juni, your post made me cry! Always so sweet!
Lioneye68 your words are greatly appreciated as well as Virgo-AriesArtist's! You are loved too!
Moonat, I don't mind at all you talking about yourself! Are you kidding, I wánt you to share! I hope you will shine your lite every day and am glad to hear you are so calm!
R.R.R. your words are very soothing! They really nurture my souls purpose. And yes I am very tired, very, very....

posted August 28, 2003 01:00 PM         

You just sit tight and give yourself a big hug from all of us. The wave will pass.

posted August 29, 2003 04:47 AM         

It passed!
I feel reborn!
But there is more to come...
Gem is having a tough time too and it only just begun....Testing, testing, one two three!
But we love each other so much and support each other through our bad times.
Hey...in two weeks we'll go on holiday, with almost nothing to spend (Saturn) !

I have to say and I want to share with you that there has been again another little bit of growth in me. Now that calls for celebration .
I just witnessed it myself this morning, laying in Beloved's arms. I was half asleep half awake and just something I cannot explain on the board happened. Something that means I have come yet another step further!

Whoohoo!