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Author
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Topic: He Kept the dogs AND left the wife!
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Philbird
Knowflake Posts: 3396
From: Here, there and everywhere.
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted July 25, 2004 02:49 PM
 
The story continues...
Out of the blue ex called my mom, who lives near him, and asked her to take my son and dogs for a while, so he can sort out this mess. He did physically leave her for the time being. My mom said he was a wreck and she was crying on the phone because he looked so bad. He was about a 38 waist and now about a 24!
My mom is quite a good listener and the time my son stays there should be a healing time.
For some reason my mom smells custody battle on the horizon if he decides to go back to the marriage...The wife claims I abandoned my son. The ex claims she doesn't love our son. The most complicated thing about the situation is my ex and the wife have a son together, that's probably why he's trying to hold onto the marriage.
If you could, could you send healing light to bechtelsville, PA. for a boy named Jay and to Yardley PA for a man named Chuck. I appreciate it soooo much. I'm doing what I can from here. I care so much for both of them. Do you guys think I should move back east? And if so for what reasons?
Mary  IP: Logged |
26taurus
Knowflake Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted July 25, 2004 02:53 PM
Much light is on it's way.  To you too Philly, I you, and I'm glad you are back. IP: Logged |
Philbird
Knowflake Posts: 3396
From: Here, there and everywhere.
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted July 25, 2004 03:33 PM
26,
If that's turtle light, could you perhaps replace it with something a little faster?
Love Ya!  IP: Logged |
trillian
Knowflake Posts: 4050
From: The Boundless
Registered: Mar 2003
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posted July 25, 2004 03:45 PM
An  for your family. I live in PA too. I'm very happy to hear he left the wife. From what I've heard of your side of the story, it's a destructive relationship. Perhaps with time to heal on his own, he will grow strong and find the way to put all these things back on the proper track. My knee-jerk reaction is that you not uproot your life. That moving back east might further complicate things. HOWEVER, if you are feeling motivated to go for your son, I would say there is no greater nor more noble cause. Can you afford to take a little time to visit in the east, or perhaps have your son come visit you for at least a few weeks? He might welcome and need the warmth of his mother. Do you have partial custody of your son? Is that what prompts you to consider the move, to battle anyone trying to take that away? I wish you the best.
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26taurus
Knowflake Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted July 25, 2004 03:47 PM
Philbird! You funny $h!t! Have you read the fable of the "Torioise and the Hare"?...
Okay then.Off to work now.  Thanks for the laugh.  IP: Logged |
Philbird
Knowflake Posts: 3396
From: Here, there and everywhere.
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted July 25, 2004 04:50 PM
Thanks Trillion,
Actually the battle is the reason I haven't jumped on a plane. I don't want to make this ugly for my son. Which I think it would.
To be honest, my ex and I divorced because I was mentally ill. He took care of our son for 7 years. We continued to communicate and I visited my son, and had him most weekends.
That is, till he got re-married. In my efforts to keep the peace and not be a contributer to jealousy issues, and also in hopes of good environment for my son, I moved to AZ. I was also having health problems due to the humid or damp climate.
I made all efforts to communicate with my son via phone or mail, but those efforts were headed off by the wife. My ex didn't know about this. Recently, my ex husband asked me for sole custody of our son, I said no because he said he wanted it because of "problems" in the marriage. Basically, even though I'm 2,400 miles away she is still jealous. I didn't think sole custody was the issue, and neither did my ex.
My inclination is to move back to be there for my son. I think it might get uglier if I move back before my ex has gotten himself together, and WE are able to discuss options. I respect my ex for being there for our son when I could not. For that reason I've been patient so he could work things out. Right now I know my son is safe with my mom. IP: Logged |
pidaua
Knowflake Posts: 7314
From: Schweinfurt to Grafenwoehr all within 6 months LOL
Registered: May 2002
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posted July 25, 2004 06:38 PM
Oh Mary..My heart is with you and your family. I know everything will turn out, these are just the hardest times. You have to do what you feel is best for your son.  IP: Logged |
silverbells
Knowflake Posts: 1506
From: The second star to the right (which shines in the night for'eer)
Registered: Apr 2003
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posted July 27, 2004 01:12 PM
Phillbird - YOu have asked for opinion and advice in particular so I will say:
If you think that you are stable and can go there at least for a little while, I would say yes because it is such a relief to be rescued when you are in trouble and it sounds like your child is. ------------------
Get some love in your groove, just get hip to forgive... - Michael Franks IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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