posted September 16, 2004 01:27 PM         

RE: relationships ...Men will date a stripper and brag to all their freinds about it, but few of them will introduce her to their family, and even fewer would ever marry one. The attitute goes something like ..."There's women who you mess around with, then there's women who you settle down with" and you either fall into one catagory or the other, with alot of men, it's that simple. You can do it for a short time only, but know that you will always have a 'shady past' after that. Some men find that intriging, but their mothers don't.

I've known a few gals over the years who stripped as a profession (a male too), and I certainly didn't hold it against them, but it did seem to change them. They both lost the sparkle in their eyes, the eagerness to drink life in...seemed to fade away.

One is now a wife and mother, and living in Kelowna, BC, and she has that spark back now. AS for the other one, she went down to LA and I fell out of touch with her altogether. Let's just say, I don't think she got her spark back. The dude, I went to high-school with him, and saw him dance a couple of times, but then, I lost track of him altogether. He wasn't even gay, believe it or not...fricken hottie indeed, but a total coke-feind..blah - no thanks.

posted September 16, 2004 02:00 PM         

I would argue that 80% of the dancers in this area would take money for sex.

I promise you that you will be propositioned regularly. Would you take the money for the job? Not the first time... but as time goes by, eventually your personal ethics get chiseled away slowly in an environment like that. Can you stand up to peer preasure? How do you feel about having to lock up your personal belongings so the other dancers don't rummage through your things to see what they would like for themselves? I've had my G-strings stolen... dirty ones!

posted September 16, 2004 02:40 PM         

You did say that you really dont want to do it, but you need the money. My advice is, don't do something you really dont want to do. There are other options but if you keep making excuses and saying that there are not, then you wont find them. Where theres a will there's a way. Don't box yourself into thinking that you have no other choice but to strip.

Someone gave some good advice - learn about manifesting abundance. There are alot of good books out there and info on the web. I am a strong beliver that you create your own reality. Take hold of you destiny. You truly have the power to make your life exactly how you want it to be.

If you think the only way you can make enough money is to strip, then the only way you will make money is if you strip. Your thoughts create your reality.

posted September 17, 2004 12:31 PM         

I said something to the effect of... you're on the stage for a small portion of time, and the rest of the time you're in your underware (or lingerie) talking with drunk men.

You're out there talking to those drunk men because if you don't work it, you're not going to make any money. You HAVE to talk to them. You HAVE to make them WANT you. You HAVE to make them want to follow you around that club like a puppy so that when you are on the stage you've got a group up there paying you. If you don't interact with the men, you won't make much. You'll make some money, especially if you're HOT. It won't be as much as the girls that are workin' it though.

It's not hard to make a drunk man in a strip club develop a crush on you. Every single one of them is (on some level) fantacizing about taking you home with him. It's your job to tap into that and (by using not so many words) make him think he *might* be able to have you.

In doing so, you accumulate regular customers who come to see you whenever they can.

Even if you are not to ever have sex with these men for money, the reality of it is that you are still selling them your body and a small piece of yourself.

If you think this is something you think you can handle and pull yourself out of when the time is right, then more power too you. Try to have as much fun with it as you can... but know that it is not something you can make a life out of.

posted September 17, 2004 03:21 PM         

Who cares. If someone comes out of the woodwork to say, "Hell no, I would never consider being with a woman who's been there." That's not a quality man right there. That's predjudice speaking, and you wouldn't want to spend you life with someone predjudiced anyhow.

posted September 17, 2004 05:03 PM         

I'm not a male Knowflake, but I have alot of male friends and know how they look at strippers. Telling them to "get the image of the stereotypical dancer out of their head" won't work. You will be looked at differently and probably not in the best light when you tell a guy what you do. I'm not saying it's right but it's a fact. If you cant deal with that aspect of it, you really shouldnt be doing it.

And what would I say about a "girl who dances at a gentlemen's club against her own wishes for the sole reason of paying her tuition?" I would say she's weak and playing the victim. She's doing something she supposedly doesnt want to do and putting her beliefs aside for money. Sorry if that sounds harsh. I really do wish you the best. But I think you should really think hard about why you actually want to do this and all of the concequences that come along with it. It sounds like the whole dangerous or forbidden aspect of it intruiges you. Do you really want to do it to pay your tuition? If so, no matter what you think, there are better ways.

Maybe you'll just have to work hard for a few years and wait on going to school. Life sucks sometimes. What is more important to you? Your self worth... doing whatever you can to make your dreams come true...?

I think working as a stripper would make school even harder, the late nights, all of the mental and emotional stress' that come along with it...
I'm not trying to be dramatic but you'll be carrying the consequences of this around with you for the rest of your life. And I'm talking more of what goes on inside of you, not what other people think of it. Who cares what others think? Even though you'll have to deal with that too. But can you? Will it be easy for you to accept other people's perceptions to you? Most importantly, will you be able to live in peace with yourself and your choices? Maybe you will, I dont know you.