Author
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Topic: nervous breakdowns...
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virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted March 30, 2005 01:26 AM
YAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 5301 From: Ontario Canada Registered: Jun 2005
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posted March 30, 2005 01:34 AM
.....admittedly not what I expected.....But okay. YYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! IP: Logged |
26taurus Knowflake Posts: 13411 From: * Registered: Jun 2004
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posted March 30, 2005 03:31 AM
Hope youre okay VTT. IP: Logged |
neptune's mermaid Knowflake Posts: 1069 From: Registered: Dec 2004
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posted March 30, 2005 04:31 AM
Is that good or bad???? If good then YAY!! If bad then IP: Logged |
laglady Knowflake Posts: 295 From: Registered: Nov 2004
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posted March 30, 2005 08:05 AM
hahaha VTTI'm just about always in some stage of nervous breakdown. IP: Logged |
Heart--Shaped Cross Knowflake Posts: 7178 From: 11/6/78 11:38am Boston, MA Registered: Aug 2004
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posted March 30, 2005 11:37 AM
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pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 5301 From: Ontario Canada Registered: Jun 2005
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posted March 30, 2005 12:45 PM
Here it comes..... here is coooooooomes... here it coooooommmmmmmes, Here it coooooooooooomes, Here comes your nineteenth nervous breakdown..... IP: Logged |
virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted March 30, 2005 07:59 PM
Hahah I really don't know why I said yay because it really sucks but YAY everyone! hahaha! I'm always in some sort of breakdown mode anyway too laglady hahaha, and it's probably my 5000th . Yeah so haha things have really been poopy for awhile but I always cover em up on here but last night I just wanted to lose it. I think it's mostly negative thoughts, it's like omg why did I come back here, this area sucks, I am too different to be here to make friends...ugh. My temp job...I just feel so ungrateful hating it like I do. I'm glad money is coming in but it has become unbearable. I run myself dry there, typing all day long, it's extremely boring, and the boss is an arrogant selfish ******* . I just had 500 more surveys dumped on me. I have had 2 different people there tell me whether I definitely am going to be doing them or not, so I called the temp agency today and the woman there was like, "Why are you calling here, you are at work?" I was stunned at her attitude. I wish I had said, "Duh, because you guys don't have any hours outside of a normal day job, and you guys hired me not this place I'm working at so YOU can give me a straight answer about these 500 more surveys!" It just turned into a huge mess. I had to call back and get someone else at the agency to call my job and figure out wtf was going on. I just hate it, I hate the lack of communication, the confusion, the stress between this job AND the agency, and I want to leave. I just went into the bathroom there and cried because the stress just reached this HUGE level. So 2 different people, 2 MORE, tried telling me something. They both made no sense. I just gave up. Then I come home to my a*hole family. That's a long story in itself, basically I get called a f**king b*tch because I said I am tired of being interrupted when I am trying to talk just so someone can rant in a delusional manner about someone they know nothing about. My Dad is so narcissistic and lives in his own great world where everyone outside of him is a huge b*tch and ******* , according to him. It wears me down and leaves a huge hole in my heart for him, I honestly wish he'd die. Fortunately, I had a job I applied to weeks ago suddenly call me out of the blue (thanks, Uranus!)!!! And we immediately set up an interview TODAY during my lunch break!!! It's kitchen/dining stuff at an old folks home. I loved it in there, the old peeps were all really nice, and the manager didn't seem shady at all. He actually seemed UNDERSTANDING! Unlike all the other managers I've interviewed with. I THINK I'm gonna get hired, he gave me an OSHA paper, said I would need to get a physical, they need to check my references (which they did by the time I got home!), and that I could probably start by Monday. Am I hired?!?!?! LOL! I also saw this super hot guy waiting outside of the mall tonight, so I tried making eye contact and we both smiled and waved to each other at the same exact time. I was too sissy to talk to him though IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Knowflake Posts: 5301 From: Ontario Canada Registered: Jun 2005
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posted March 30, 2005 08:15 PM
Your nervous breakdown sounded kinda' nice, actually. Good luck. Go ask that guy to be your pimp next time. IP: Logged |
Johnny Knowflake Posts: 2056 From: Colorado, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted March 30, 2005 08:15 PM
Virgotaurustaurus, I know exactly how you feel. I used to live in just about the same situation you just described. I had a job that I hated, lived with a dad whom I wanted to kill, and was tired and depressed constantly. I felt like my life was at the utter, lowest low it could possibly fall to. But then, out of the blue, everything turned around - my dad was arrested ( haven't had to talk to the ******* since ), I found a job that was extraordinarily better than the one I had, and, suddenly, crazily, everything in life was brighter, better. I am still amazed at just how quickly my life turned around. So what I'm trying to say is just hold on, because your life will change when you least expect it, probably so fast that you won't even realize anything is different until everything is. Just watch.IP: Logged |
virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 12:09 AM
Damn Johnny, I was actually hoping today that my dad cannot control his rage in public or with the neighbor and gets in a fight and arrested. I will not be bailing the douche out. I think he can rot in hell. I'm hoping the jobs just keep coming, one better than the one before it. That is the one thing I really got going for me, if I had a tolerable one I wouldn't be ready to flip out due to stress like I have been the past week. The temp job is searing retardedness, I am being played around by both the people at the job and the people at the temp agency and I want nothing to do with them ever again. They should live with my dad, they're freaks like him. I am glad to hear that life can turn around that quickly. Holding on is just so hard at times, I feel like I am going to break lately, it seems like the majority of the people I've run into for the past 2 weeks have had major sticks up their ***** . God help the next person who uses me or walks all over me. I honestly keep feeling that things soon will change for the better. I just keep having that hunch. I mean, they slowly are anyway, I have had a job, I have a job interview today, my social life is slowly changing to actually being somewhat fun (although, someone who has been fun keeps giving free advice in the form of things that are much easier said than done but she doesn't actually want to pitch in and help me out)...it's just so slow. Sorry this probably sounds like an irritable reply! I'm just very fed up with things again. I only have so much patience. Plus today was hectic, insane, overly stressful, so that doesn't help. IP: Logged |
virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 12:45 AM
I also should note, that my Saturn square Saturn and Pluto end in May. This may be a large part of why I feel like things are going to change for the better for me soon. I won't have Saturn pooping on my 6th house so badly, which is where Jupiter is for me. However, I will still have Saturn trining Mars which actually isn't all that great. But I think there will be huge changes due to those aspects coming to a close. OH! ANd Saturn opposition MC. I also have a short Saturn trine Uranus in July...I think this summer is going to honestly be change change change. Especially having Pluto conjunct Neptune, which is inward transformation. IP: Logged |
26taurus Knowflake Posts: 13411 From: * Registered: Jun 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 01:25 AM
That really sucks VTT. Well, maybe the end of the Saturn square transit will change things. Sounds like youve got some good stuff coming up. My fingers are crossed for you.IP: Logged |
sue g Knowflake Posts: 8591 From: former land of the leprechaun Registered: Sep 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 12:15 PM
Just come thro one kids, and I am beginning to feel so much better, my friend said to me I look purer (ha ha), but I know what she means. I had a horrible one when I was 26 after my first marriage breakup - couldn't eat or go out on my own and even moved back in with the parents for a while which was very tough. Oh and by the way, these days "they" call them breakthroughs (softens the blow when telling others, dont you think)? Love and breakthroughs to you all x x
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Johnny Knowflake Posts: 2056 From: Colorado, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 12:52 PM
Heh, nothing wrong with an irritable reply, VTT. Sometimes life just sucks, and there is nothing more stress-relieving than venting. Well, there are some things more stress relieving, but they usually aren't legal. But I know your life will start looking better soon - in the meantime, did you know that you are an incredible artist?IP: Logged |
Johnny Knowflake Posts: 2056 From: Colorado, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 01:11 PM
Lol, Sue G. Nervous breakthroughs. I like it!IP: Logged |
Philbird Knowflake Posts: 3396 From: Here, there and everywhere. Registered: Jun 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 03:28 PM
VTT, I was once in a seemingly unbearable situation. A very nice woman gave me the mental release of a life time. "Just look it as though you are passing through." Which I translated into, why bear this heavy emotional garbage that is caused by people that aren't going to be in my life forever? I don't plan on staying in this place all my life. I gave myself permission to let go of my anger, hate and spite, and use that energy to think about better things to come, which gave me more hope for my future. I knew the situation would be different another day. The freedom to be, and patience with myself until I am where I want to be. IP: Logged |
neptune's mermaid Knowflake Posts: 1069 From: Registered: Dec 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 05:05 PM
I’m really sorry you’re feeling down VTT but things seem to be getting better, I think you just need to think positively. Why didn’t you talk to that guy? Hey pixie… no, she would be his pimp I really do hope things get better for you - actually, I know they will Loads of honey. I love what you wrote Philbird
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virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 06:07 PM
Thank you 26T! I still need to email you back I'm hoping for good stuff at the end of the Saturn transit sue I like that! breakthroughs hahaha I think I will start using that. LOL Johnny! Haha yeah and I want to do all the illegal ones Why thank you about me being an incredible artist, I just remembered I probably haven't replied to my art thread yet. Philbird, that is an amazing idea! A big part of my unhappiness does stem from the feeling of being stuck, so the passing through stuff would definitely be a HUGE help. I kind of had that outlook earlier, I called the temp agency to tell them I had interviewed for a permanent job, and they actually got MAD and gave me an ATTITUDE. So I was like, "And, I will not be working past Friday." HAHAH. That job was supposed to end Friday anyway but they decided to throw more work on me. This too shall pass, I assumed, and I relaxed. I just felt like even if I wind up not being hired for the old folks home I just interviewed for, I bet there's something even better around the corner and I just don't see it yet. IP: Logged |
virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted March 31, 2005 06:08 PM
Hey neptune's mermaid! I think I need to think positively too. I think I definitely need to do some affirmations daily. Haha I was thinking how funny it'd be to call them Positive Thinking Exercises, like your brain needs a positive workout. I didn't talk to the guy because I'm shy Waving was a big step in being assertive for me haha! I also wondered why he didn't have a car, and who was picking him up at the mall..hmm! Haha he'd definitely be my pimp! WOO!! I think things will get better too. Especially with summer coming, somehow things just don't suck so bad during the warm weather. haha! IP: Logged |
LibraSparkle Knowflake Posts: 6034 From: Vancouver USA Registered: May 2004
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posted April 01, 2005 09:27 AM
Hey sweets Johnny's right. Things will turn around eventually. If life were full of nothing but good times, we wouldn't know the times were good. We need the bad times to gauge the good. Ya know? Yin and Yang, sweetie. Life is a series of ups and downs. Just try to stay positive while you're waiting for your next upswing. IP: Logged |
virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted April 02, 2005 12:29 AM
LOL LibraSparkle, what you posted was so relevant to how today went, looks like things might be turning around even now You're so right about how we wouldn't know the times were good if they were all good! IP: Logged |
LibraSparkle Knowflake Posts: 6034 From: Vancouver USA Registered: May 2004
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posted April 02, 2005 02:37 AM
Glad to hear it I can't wait to hear all about your new job that doesn't suck! IP: Logged |
maya-v Knowflake Posts: 1534 From: Registered: Dec 2004
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posted June 28, 2005 07:38 AM
VTT ... bring this thread back to life pleeeeeeeeeease!IP: Logged |
virgotaurustaurus Knowflake Posts: 2474 From: upstate NY, USA Registered: Oct 2004
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posted June 28, 2005 08:02 AM
why?IP: Logged |