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Author
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Topic: Testing someone
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CancerianMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1082
From: Sydney, Australia. Cancer Sun.....Gemini Moon.....Aqua Rising
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted February 21, 2006 09:29 PM
 
If a seed of doubt was placed in a relationship...would you then follow it up or would you just leave it??
i am facing this situation..i feel torn between the two responses...leave it and wonder...or look more into it and seem like a jealous or insecure woman..IP: Logged |
lotusheartone
Knowflake Posts: 238
From: MOther & Father GOd
Registered: Feb 2008
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posted February 21, 2006 09:36 PM
hmmm, only you can answer that questionthe seed of doubt will grow.. or it will not sprout.. then you will know your course.. psst, if it's eating you up, and you can't let it go, then it's best to talk about it.. Sending you Lots of Love.. IP: Logged |
Aphrodite
Knowflake Posts: 4992
From:
Registered: Feb 2002
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posted February 22, 2006 01:38 PM
How do you mean testing someone?IP: Logged |
The Mutable Night Force
Knowflake Posts: 1451
From: England
Registered: Dec 2004
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posted February 22, 2006 01:51 PM
This is hard... depends on the 'way' of testing you were thinking of and what exactly made you wonder in the first place. Also, would you rather live in ignorant bliss or what may be possibly the horrible truth?IP: Logged |
CancerianMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1082
From: Sydney, Australia. Cancer Sun.....Gemini Moon.....Aqua Rising
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted February 22, 2006 03:14 PM
Aphrodite..(this is about the taurus i posted about in astrology forum)I guess i used the word test because i was thinking a multitude of things i could do to "investigate" and test someones sincerity.. but i know myself i wouldnt like someone to do this to me..i dont like feeling like this and would normally just take this oppourtunity to walk away..this has been my previous pattern..to just leave if someone made me feel like this..but i really like this guy and at the same time dont want to be naiive or on the other hand jealous and insecure.. i know things in relationships pop up for a reason...and i dont wanna be blind to that..im just stuck on what to do next...i guess the real dilemna is because i dont have a good history with relationships(ever)..if they were difficult or i felt that i may get hurt or too involved that or thought of being left was too great i would just leave or make issues where there need not be...but i have been through a transition of sorts and learnt to choose a different kind of guy..but now how to deal with the relationships i have in a different manner, is all new to me..i think im rambling now..but i wanna be a grown up in terms of how i handle relationships and im in new waters so i guess some insecuritites are showing not to mention the fact i sometimes overanalyse things..as you can see from my post im fighting with myself as to whether im gonna be naiive or jealous/insecure...cant i be middle ground..and just let things flow..or would u call that naiive too?And thank you Lotus..wise words MNF i was thinking of tooooo many ways..but i have a huge and crazy imagination! I also wrote this while in the depths of my confusion.. the thing that made me wonder was a phone call.. he told me that it was someone..but yesterday i found out it was someone else(not through him) as for horrible truth i stand for that one any day..but i do have issues with going oout of bounds checking on someone..where and when do you draw that line..and what warrants it..geees im laughing at myself now.. i think im sounding crazy..anyways..feedfack is welcome  IP: Logged |
Aphrodite
Knowflake Posts: 4992
From:
Registered: Feb 2002
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posted February 22, 2006 03:59 PM
Hi CancerianMoon,I have felt similiarly as you. How I was raised without proper relationship role models and had entered into a few disasterous relationships in the past. Not to mention poor dating choices too.  It's hard and confusing, I totally know!  I've had to create from scratch new grooves in my brain of what healthy relationships are to "Amy." I wrote a reply to the Bad Guy vs. Good Guy thread about how I feel when it came to judgements. This is what I wrote: *********************************
I have Venus in Pisces. Even though I am turning 27 in a couple of months, I relate more to being in the advanced discovery state about who I tend to go for. This is because in the past, men would consciously give an impression of who they think they are. It was hard for me to delineate between that and figuring out what pieces really went where. I've had to develop better ways to pick up clues to find out who the man really was. Lately, I am starting to realize the I probably put more thought into this than most other people in understanding in their dates and why they attract certain vibes. I think Good and Bad are entirely subjective.
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum10/HTML/002014.html
********************************* So I am with you in new waters too! I feel I am always discovering. IP: Logged |
AcousticGod
Knowflake Posts: 11943
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005
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posted February 22, 2006 04:59 PM
Ooooh...Taurus. This is going to be slippery. A Taurus when caught in a lie will always try to explain it away as being way more trivial than you're making it. Is the lie a consequential one? I mean does the thing he lied about really have bearing on your relationship, or is it just a matter of not being able to trust him because you are aware that he lied? My best friend is a Taurus, and he used to lie and exaggerate quite frequently, and it was a bit obvious and annoying, but I let it slide. He's married to a Capricorn, though, and the exaggerations have steadily declined over the years. (I think the last one was when Shannon Elizabeth became popular. First he said he went to school with her, and then later he claimed that he dated her. I don't believe it for a second. I don't even think he's as tall as her.) Anyway, if I were in your shoes I'd probably wait it out and see what else happens. My theory is that a person will ALWAYS reveal themselves. You just have to be alert to catching it. IP: Logged |
silvermoon
Knowflake Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005
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posted February 23, 2006 06:03 PM
I hear u, Cancerian Moon.In assesing the situation, how 'bout relying on your best bet
- good ol' Cancerian Intuition ! 
Hugs 
silvermoonIP: Logged |
CancerianMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1082
From: Sydney, Australia. Cancer Sun.....Gemini Moon.....Aqua Rising
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted February 23, 2006 07:40 PM
Gosh i buckled down laughing re reading my last post and my typo.. "feedfack" just sounds funny..lol..gotta be able to laugh at yourself!!  Thanks Aphrodite.. Im 35 and have only been having more healthy relationships in tha past year ..i have found with my inner change the guys i attract are automatically different than all those in my past..hurrah for that! AG..i think thats exactly what i will do...just wait and see what happens..just keeping my eyes open silvermoon..intuition is turned on..just gotta learn to differentiate between intuition and imagination  Thanks for the hugs.. IP: Logged |
Aphrodite
Knowflake Posts: 4992
From:
Registered: Feb 2002
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posted February 23, 2006 08:45 PM
Aww, hurray for you! I've been dating a really sweet Libra man for 3 months now. Things have been good and I count my blessings everyday. Oh yes! I have noticed that when we change on the inside, we attract different things. I had a dream about six months ago having a conversation with a friend. We were talking about body language and how to read them. In the dream, I thought to myself that if I could read well, then I could also transform and "write" to encourage new language. Interesting. Hope you are feeling better today! IP: Logged |
silvermoon
Knowflake Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005
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posted February 25, 2006 03:18 PM
Yes, it is often a challenge distinguishing between the two (Intuit vs Imag ) for us Cancers 
I've found meditation can help clear the way somewhat, but sometimes it is all so mixed up in our emotions  it's hard to distinguish...
Anyway, I hope you are getting some clarity and insight around this.
Hang In There
silvermoon IP: Logged |
CancerianMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1082
From: Sydney, Australia. Cancer Sun.....Gemini Moon.....Aqua Rising
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted February 26, 2006 05:11 PM
Thanks Aphrodite I hope things work well with your libra guy! your words always touch me..thank you
Thanks silvermoon i have saved your address you may remove it from here now if you like will write to you soon
Everything is ok right now..im just letting it flow..which is sometimes difficult for me..i think its my cancer sun/gemini moon and the slow/fast thing thanks for your continuing care
IP: Logged |
Aphrodite
Knowflake Posts: 4992
From:
Registered: Feb 2002
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posted February 28, 2006 12:50 AM
You're welcome CancerianMoon Thanks for the well wishes for the Libra and me. I wish the same for you and your Taurus. How are you holding up? IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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