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Kamilla
Knowflake

Posts: 860
From: NJ USA
Registered: Apr 2006

posted May 17, 2006 03:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kamilla     Edit/Delete Message
WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Answers:

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that
he must first deal with the problem on "THIS" side of the road before it goes
after the problem on the "OTHER SIDE" of the road. What we need to do is
help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his "CURRENT" problems before adding "NEW" problems.

OPRAH: Well I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W BUSH: We don't really care why the
chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

ANDERSON COOPER/CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am for it now, and will remain against it.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY!
You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent,
hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed
I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain. Alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's why they call it the "other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this
abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that!

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to
accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in peace.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2005, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken. The Platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^( C \..... reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

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pixelpixie
Knowflake

Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted May 17, 2006 03:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for pixelpixie     Edit/Delete Message
That's freakin' awesome!
Finger licking good!

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Moon666Child
Knowflake

Posts: 2025
From:
Registered: Jul 2004

posted May 17, 2006 03:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Moon666Child     Edit/Delete Message

------------------
Welcome Home to GhostVillage

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WaterNymph
Knowflake

Posts: 2276
From: London, UK
Registered: May 2005

posted May 17, 2006 04:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WaterNymph     Edit/Delete Message
"COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?"

------------------
;-)

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salome
Knowflake

Posts: 1521
From:
Registered: Nov 2005

posted May 17, 2006 04:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for salome     Edit/Delete Message
lol...

so clever

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Solane Star
Knowflake

Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted May 17, 2006 10:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Solane Star     Edit/Delete Message
That's the best!!!!

Thanks Kamilla!!!!

Well e-mail that one out too all my friends!!!!

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DayDreamer
Knowflake

Posts: 4841
From:
Registered: Jul 2003

posted May 17, 2006 10:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DayDreamer     Edit/Delete Message
Nice one

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Azalaksh
Knowflake

Posts: 6485
From: New Brighton, MN, USA
Registered: Nov 2004

posted May 18, 2006 09:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Azalaksh     Edit/Delete Message
Kamilla ~

This is hilarious!! It's hitting the email address book *now* .....

Thanks,
Zala

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Rainbow~
Knowflake

Posts: 5927
From: The Little River Indian Reservation
Registered: Jan 2002

posted May 18, 2006 09:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Rainbow~     Edit/Delete Message

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