posted September 09, 2007 10:01 AM         

Sending one cup of hugs, a pinch of kisses, and 3 tablespoons of strength/courage -- let's bake!!!

posted September 09, 2007 11:50 AM           

Fayte, What you said is so very true. Thanks. Incidently, you also have mail. It occured to me that getting this email at this time was not only a message and reminder for folks at LL but for you and I as well. Maybe especially us, Fayte

With love, forgiveness and effort we can all overcome hostility, disagreements and misunderstandings. I am sharing Pid's email with you because she said she does want people at LL to know how words effect other people.

Mirandee,

I would never hold anything against you. I understand the intent, it just hurt because I had caused hurt to Ginny and I hurt from the exchange. The dr said I don't have cancer, but the fibroid is back to the way it was- almost the size of a 12 week fetus. He said that although they fixed my fallopian tube he felt horrible that they could not remove the mass. He said he has seen people still get pregnant with a fibroid my size but he worries that my uterus may not be able to hold a baby. I may suffer more and more miscarriages and end up having a total hysterectomy. I am trying to stay optimistic but it hurts... had I been brave enough years ago to go to the doc when I felt something, then maybe this wouldn't be happening now. I have changed my diet to exclude any estrogen producing foods and I will be using herbal remedies now to try and shrink the fibroid but I am still reeling from the news. He felt so awful yet I remained hopeful. I believe everything happens for a reason and I have faith that God has a lesson in all of this. God gives us what we can handle and if I am not meant to have children then there is a reason. I hadn't told Bear of my fears because I don't want to worry him. The thread just brought up old pain.

I am happy that Ginny forgave me but I am still so sad for what I said. She was a remarkable person and I felt connected to her even in our battles. I never wanted to hurt her and I would give anything to have her back. I just lost my full-blood abuela the day before surgery and I thought of Ginny and her children.

I just need some time to collect my thoughts. There is so much negativity at LL right now. The whole KS thing coming up and seeing the exchanges. It's all so sad. I do not hold anything against you or Ginny regarding the comments about me not having kids. Things were said that weren't meant to hurt ... maybe we saw something the other person suffered from and it just came out wrong.

I care deeply for you and I love you as a dear friend. Nothing will change that. I know you didn't mean to cause pain. You aren't like that. I believe you wanted to show others that even from the harshest times forgiveness and love can emerge. My hope is that others will learn from that lesson. Maybe they will see how words can hurt on a deeper level. Maybe they will see that even the most heated exchanges can bridge friendships.

I will be back. At this time I just need to think about a few things. Life is changing for me. I am moving to a different country and starting a new chapter in life which is exciting and scary. I feel the need to pull in for a bit and be a little introspective. You said it so well, I need to forgive myself for the guilt I feel for what I said to Ginny.

You can post this on LL. I do want people to know how words can affect others. You won't lose my friendship. I know you didn't post the e-mail to cause pain but to serve as an example. I also want them to know that I am not upset with you at all. You are still very much a friend to me.

I'll be back to LL.... I just need a break.

Love and Light,

posted September 09, 2007 11:59 AM           

Love one another as I have loved you.

posted September 09, 2007 12:49 PM         

quote:

---

The email is a reminder to us to be careful about what we say to others because we don't know what is going on in the lives of others we personally attack. We especially don't know that on the internet. It's a reminder of how very hurtful our words can be to other people. It may be a computer screen we are looking at when we write our posts here at LL but there is a feeling human being on the other side of that screen - a human being who can be hurt very badly by our words.

---

A*M*E*N*!!!!!

I am oblivious to most that goes on here, 'cos I am usually mia, so I don't know what has been going on at FFA.

However, what is important in life, is being truley grateful for *what* you have, being grateful for the family and friends you have. You never know what is around the corner, and how your life might change in an instant.

Fighting and bickering over silly things is a waste of everyone's energy, and it doesn't get you anywhere.

We feel much lighter when we're in a positive space than in a negative one!

Take care everyone!

posted September 09, 2007 01:26 PM           

Just want to clarify that what has been said here is not a lecture for others, it's a reminder for myself as well as a reminder for everyone at LL.

posted September 09, 2007 02:18 PM         

quote:

---

The email is a reminder to us to be careful about what we say to others because we don't know what is going on in the lives of others we personally attack. We especially don't know that on the internet. It's a reminder of how very hurtful our words can be to other people. It may be a computer screen we are looking at when we write our posts here at LL but there is a feeling human being on the other side of that screen - a human being who can be hurt very badly by our words.

---

quote:

---

And all the more hurtful when one knows another is going through a hard time or ordeal, and does it anyhow.

---

Well said, Mirandee and Fayte.
Reminds me of when I told you I was contemplating suicide,
and you two tore into me with a myriad of assumptions
and extremely hurtful words,
and, then, when I broke down and BEGGED you to stop,
and for god's sake not to provoke a person who is on the edge,
you heaped on more scorn and abuse.
Wow, that sucked.
Still healing from that.

I definitely take these lessons to heart.
I try to forgive, but not forget.
It takes a lot to convince me a person has changed.

For instance, when I asked Pidaua if it was necessary to call Evolution stupid (in a dozen different ways, in one single post), and she responded by heaping a variety of abusive comments on me and telling me to crawl back under my rock. She apologized for this, but, before I was able to forgive her, she's said other hurtful and slanderous things which she has not apologized for, and which make it hard for me to focus on the good in her. I'm sorry she is dealing with some health concerns now. Even if it is karmic in nature, and the result of the anger she has nursed for years and mercilessly unleashed on others many many many times, it is still unfortuneate, and I do hope she gets well soon. I'm glad to hear she is going within. Frankly, I suspect this time apart will be healing, not just for Pid, but for many people.

I want a perfect world full of love and light as much as anybody here. I want to let go and move on from these things. But the truth is the truth. Sometimes we need to look at it before wiping the slate clean, if we are going to learn anything at all.

I've said some things here recently that I am not proud of. I've spoken patronizingly and made implications about others' intelligence or spiritual awareness. I havent phrased my views in the most appropriate way, to say the least. For that, I am sorry. I did not intend to cause pain, but, I realize now, I accomplished little else. I'm trying to be aware of that now and make a change.

posted September 09, 2007 04:49 PM         

You just don't get HSC!!!!

Go ahead and turn it all around and say I'm attacking you, because you always do!!!

posted September 09, 2007 04:56 PM         

quote:

---

I've said some things here recently that I am not proud of. I've spoken patronizingly and made implications about others' intelligence or spiritual awareness. I havent phrased my views in the most appropriate way, to say the least. For that, I am sorry. I did not intend to cause pain, but, I realize now, I accomplished little else. I'm trying to be aware of that now and make a change.

---

posted September 09, 2007 05:22 PM         

That doesn't sound like one forgiving another and going around throughing it back up in ones face, is it???

posted September 09, 2007 05:30 PM         

Two wrongs don't make a right and you know that!!!

Maybe thats the whole point, just letting it go, by not rubbing it in all the time!!!

posted September 09, 2007 05:31 PM           

quote:

---

I've said some things here recently that I am not proud of. I've spoken patronizingly and made implications about others' intelligence or spiritual awareness. I havent phrased my views in the most appropriate way, to say the least. For that, I am sorry. I did not intend to cause pain, but, I realize now, I accomplished little else. I'm trying to be aware of that now and make a change.

---

That's beautiful, HSC and I am trying to be more aware of it too. We all make mistakes and hurt others and sometimes, maybe most times, we do it unintentionally.

I know I have hurt you in the past, HSC and for that I sincerely apologize. As for things that you have said or done that hurt me you are more than forgiven. Once forgiven I will never bring any of those things from the past up to you. If I ever do, slap me on the wrist for it.

Sometimes you can drive me bonkers at times but I have never lost sight of the beautiful qualities you possess. Actually I think we challenge each other's beliefs and I think that is a very good thing. It helps me greatly when you challenge my faith. It helps my faith to grow and it also makes it stronger. You do me a great service in that respect. Hopefully, once in a while, I return that service to you. I also, believe it or not, do listen to what you have to say and you have given me much food for thought.

It's just that maybe we both need to work on how we word things to each other and others. I know I can be a pain in the butt at times.

I have always said that in spite of our disagreements I like you, HSC. That still stands and even when I am pointing out to you where you have overstepped my personal boundaries I still at the same time like you for your beautiful qualities.

None of us are perfect. We all mess up. So don't forget to forgive yourself when you forgive others. Be gentle with yourself knowing that we are all broken and for that reason we all have a lot to work on changing. Takes a lifetime I think and our best teacher is experience, the good ones and the bad ones. It has been my experience in life that I have learned the best lessons from my bad experiences in life. I have also grown stronger from those experiences.

posted September 09, 2007 05:48 PM         

I will stand tall, for my sentence in the hopes I don't have to go though this on and on forever, the sentence that is!!!

posted September 09, 2007 05:55 PM         

The internet is a cold medium so how`s about we warm it up by remembering the good in folks instead of the little cranky bugs we all get bit by.

To anyone who`s felt slighted/diminished or hurt by me, I am sorry and ask your forgiveness.

------------------
~
What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world is immortal"~

posted September 09, 2007 05:56 PM         

j/k Solane
We *all* get hot under the collar. We *all* have provocations. We *all* speak without thinking of the consequences sometimes. And I think we *all*, without exception and including myself, could practice better tolerance for one another's foibles.....

Z