posted August 17, 2008 03:22 AM            

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Where upon my spouse whispered in her ear that she could go F herself.

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sometimes i wish i wasn't so polite and could say stuff like that.

if that had been my husband i would have burst out laughing. it appeals so much to my sense of humour. and it's actually something my husband would say too.

good for him.

posted August 17, 2008 04:08 PM            

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I applaud you for keeping your cool...I would have kicked her to kingdom come...it is disgusting to see people behave like that

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posted August 18, 2008 03:31 AM            

I'd been sent to live with Granny there again shortly before I turned 14 (I'd lived there before up until I was about 5 years old) while my parents were going through a particularly bitter (and violent) divorce. So in order to help introduce me, she took me to a local Baptist church. Unfortunately, the preacher there loved to stare at new members (some say that he was always trying to recreate the feeling that some famous Protestant had of where church people clung to the pews for fear of slipping into Hell if they didn't) took to staring at me while preaching brimstone and hellfire. Being annoyed at his rudeness, I got some gummi worms from Granny's purse, chewed them up, and then stuck my tongue out. With the wisdom of a 13-year-old, I figured he'd be so grossed out that he'd stare somewhere else for awhile.

Natch, that backfired. He about had a stroke while ranting like a loon and people ahead of me actually started to turn to see what upset him so, and then Granny slapped my leg and I swallowed the worms. After services, he was sure to catch Granny to ask about me. After he heard that I'd been living in the outskirts of Houston until the rough divorce of my 'rents, he turned back to me and started lecturing about how they didn't like "punks from the big city" here until I asked him if he had any idea just how boring he was. At that point he started to act as if he was about to have another stroke and Granny pulled me away. Luckily, while Granny did scold me hardcore, she did have some choice words about the preacher, too, including, "You're 13, but what's HIS excuse!?"

Unknown to me, rumors about the new girl spread like fire, and grew in the telling. By the time I was in school, some actually believed I was a **** of Satan (btw, I was also prepubescent; I was under doctor's orders to gain weight so that I could finally enter puberty). It was amazing what they believed. One boy on the bus turned and asked if I really worshiped Satan, and I sarcastically said, "Yes, and I cast spells, so shut up." He did, acting too scared to even look at me. Other guys were disappointed to learn that I wasn't a **** either for myself or as part of my supposed devotion to Satan. I think the funniest (to me) was when one claimed to see me kill a cat for Halloween. The ones claiming that were at a loss when I exploded, "You saw me killing a cat and didn't stop me!? You're sick!!!"

Because I was an outcast, I got shunted with the other outcasts, which were an interesting mix. One of them was of partial Asian ancestry and some thought it was unnatural that someone like that had a Texan accent.

It wasn't just kids, either. Adults never stopped staring or whispering wherever I went. If I walked with 2 boys, then the next day it was spread that I was having sex with both of them, and Granny would bring it up to let me know I needed to be more careful (as she at least knew better than to believe all the gossip, but was still worried about my getting a "reputation").

My cousin Zack was pretty cool, most of the time. He's pretty much "white trash" like you described (save he's not a jerk--most of the time--and he's not a Christian, and he was more likely to wear like a Pantera shirt, IIRC, with a pot leaf which didn't go over well with the locals, despite the confederate flag on that shirt), and we made fun of him calling him "Zeke."

Once he took me to a kegger, and this was a "dry county" (which means there are heavy restrictions, if not outright prohibitions, on the selling of alcohol). The cops actually raided us, but we were out in a pasture and almost all of us got away (I heard one of the few to get caught was someone drunk who tried to carry off an empty keg with him).

Interesting enough, I did shrooms in that town and when I had a brief flashback (with intense giggling) in class later, most of the kids were able to tell what was wrong with me, while the teacher acted all naive & confused.

That town was not only the first place that I went to a kegger & did shrooms, but also first tried pot, viewed porn, experimented sexually more than I'd ever done before, and shot a real gun for the first time. In retrospect, I don't get why the preacher thought that I was going to corrupt THEM when it was more the other way around.

Years later, after living in CA for awhile, I returned for a visit with a close friend. I barely managed to restrain myself from putting a bumper sticker that said, "Sorry I missed Church. I was busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian." (We'd leave, but I worried that it would make trouble for the family afterwards.) Perhaps a good choice because when a bunch of us got together in Palestine (closest "real city" though it's still a small town) restaurant, a bunch of rednecks started giving my friend (a tatooed blasian), and possibly myself, the evil eye until Zack yelled a harsh, "WHAT!?" at them. I noticed them then, and many in my family turned to glare back, and it was clear that they were standing with us, and the other rednecks turned away. I can only guess that they were offended at my blasian friend sitting with us Nordic types (we're mostly blonds). Supposedly, the owner of the restaurant there was a black guy that hired a white guy to PRETEND to own it so that it wouldn't lose biz. Anyway, it was nice that my family stood up for us like that.

posted August 18, 2008 07:27 AM            

From another quiet person who hates people who have no concept of personal space.

posted August 18, 2008 08:34 AM            

Unmoved!
Thank you!
Hope you are feeling better.

posted August 18, 2008 09:57 AM            

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Of course the rednecks call us snobs and stuffy.

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must admit that's something i haven't learnt to deal with yet. i generally don't like being accused of things i didn't do or am not. i've spent a lifetime learning that i'm as good and equal to everyone else, so when someone thinks i think i'm better it gets me because it's so far from who i am and where i've come from. it's ridiculous that if you present yourself as a decent human being that some people think you're a snob. i'm not class conscious - but it says something about where they place themselves.

posted August 18, 2008 01:13 PM            

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Redneck? I am confused by the term. What does it mean? A person who is poor and obnoxious?

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However in my area that is not the case.
Most rednecks are well off or wealthy, not poor at all. If poor they have so many kids by often ,more than one woman so as to live very well off welfare, (they get alot more freebies for each kid, so even when their welfare runs out they can suck it up off their kids incomes, and section 8, ssi, free food, steak even! And other free things, free medical, free utilities, heat and so forth. So..they go around collecting scrap metal, or robbing places for copper,to sell and or work for construction companies or deal drugs, and keep all that income secret from the welfare checks they get and free housing in better single family homes than we live in. Absentee landlords love them because the rent getting paid comes from the government.

So poor does not apply much anymore.
And neither does being from the country. Most live in the cities and suburbs these days in my area.
Many are apt to be into Rapp not just Country too.
As for drugs, meth labs are the thing many of them have who deal drugs.
The actual wealthy ones are the church goers and unfortunately the people in charge of things in the small towns and cities too often. They make trouble for the schools and picket planned parenthood.
The "poor" ones are often loud party animals whose noise can be heard for several blocks. Fireworks are a common past time and the cops do not do a thing about it because most of them are bubbas too and off duty they party right along with them. And illegal fireworks cost alot! These people must be spending hundreds of dollars every week on them! It can go on for hours! And it usually happens at least 3 or more times each week. Big ones, not only a few, and not tiny bottle rockets either.
The wealthy ones are busy bodies who do as that woman did and try to get into everyone's private or public business to stir up trouble or show off.
What a mess!

posted August 18, 2008 01:38 PM            

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Like the butt crack family near us. They play golf in full golfing outfits and use crushed beer cans for golf balls. When not golfing they wear pants that fall down, and no underwear...then they bend over....to pull up pants....I have seen far too many a full moon with the family jewels a dangling on slobby bubbas who strut like roosters and zoom around in $30,000 souped up trucks boom boxing.

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LEXX,

You deserve this Pulitzer Prize and more just for writing that out. I was having the most difficult time waking up today and you succeeded in waking me up by making me laugh histerically while trying to keep quiet in my office. "The Butt Crack Family" will live on in my imagination forever. I've stopped trying to wake up, now I'm trying to stop laughing. Absolutely brilliant!!

Geocosmic Valentine

posted August 18, 2008 01:54 PM            

I do not measure a person by money.
I measure them by class manners and respectfulness of others.
Admittedly, there are indeed people who are disgusting to be around. Its not about snobbery at all.

posted August 18, 2008 02:09 PM            

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Lexx...I thought this was funny too..but I can totally sympathize..I too live in Northeast Ohio, and we have some similiar areas near us, so I know exactly what your talking about...

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posted August 18, 2008 02:18 PM            

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This thread is priceless... I mean, really... I live in South Alabama, one of those states that is practically famous for backwards rednecks, but no one here is all THAT bad.

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