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Author
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Topic: GODZALA
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meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 12:54 PM
 
quote:
No, not negative. But not positive.This is something that we genuinely need to resolve isn't it. Because it's going to keep getting in the way, I think. It keeps coming up - and it's just going to unless we work through it. I think I'm meant to teach you to help get over your jealous issues and what are you supposed to teach me? Look at it like this - if we were both in a room with Rafe, I wouldn't stand a chance with him. Aside that in a room full of women he wouldn't come my way. But between us he'd choose you - right. Hands down. You're amazingly funny, seeringly smart, and you've posted your pic - I've seen you - you're beautiful. And he would feel the connection between you.
PA, I am sorry that it has gotten to this point. I don't think you understand. I'm not jealous of you and Ralph. Really. I know you don't care for Ralph in that way, and i am sorry for pestering you about it all the time. It was all in jest. All of it.
I ask you these questions concerning him, and i looked at your synastry to get a better feel of the bond. Not to compare you to me, or the relationship i would have with him to the relationship you would have with him. Honestly. I only want to hear the feel you get from him. I think we're both very good at feeling out other from their charts. And feeling out connections through charts.
I am sorry. I apologize profusely.
I know i am an irrevocably jealous person. It's not one of my better qualities, but it's a trait of mine nevertheless.
I am sorry that i have failed to teach you anything, because knowing you, even through the net, has benefited me greatly.
I thank you for your complements, and i assure you they are appreciated. However, i cannot help but feel like you downplay yourself. You say you wouldn't stand a chance with Ralph, you say you're not sure Kiefer, or RDJ or whoever would be interested in you. Why not? Why the hell not? Have you met you? You're f&ckin' fantastic. And i mean that. I can't believe, or fathom how you could not think they wouldn't adore you instantly. You need to realize that you're beautiful, and intelligent, and wonderful just the way you are. Do you know that? Do you REALLY know that? IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 12:57 PM
quote:
metaI think, without the astrology, using your senses, you know exactly what the dynamic is between Rafe and I. I know you do.
I know. You're right. And the same goes for you- i know you know the dynamic between me and-anyone. I know you know the dynamic between you and-anyone. That's what i was saying. SO i suppose you're right, to an extent, in that my jealous and possessiveness was playing a part in the You/Ralph scenario. I had a feeling about the dynamic between you, but i was so uneasy about the thought of you being twinflames that i pushed you about it. I am sorry. IP: Logged |
darkdreamer
Knowflake Posts: 3198
From: Germany
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted October 17, 2008 12:57 PM
PA,"You need to realize that you're beautiful, and intelligent, and wonderful just the way you are. Do you know that? Do you REALLY know that?"
What she said. That girl is pretty smart, you know? You should listen to her.  IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:01 PM
meta quote:
However, i cannot help but feel like you downplay yourself. You say you wouldn't stand a chance with Ralph, you say you're not sure Kiefer, or RDJ or whoever would be interested in you. Why not? Why the hell not? Have you met you? You're f&ckin' fantastic. And i mean that. I can't believe, or fathom how you could not think they wouldn't adore you instantly. You need to realize that you're beautiful, and intelligent, and wonderful just the way you are. Do you know that? Do you REALLY know that?
You really touched me with that. Made me cry, actually. I would like to think that people would see the good things, but you can't make people see you as you intend to be seen. They can't do that. And sometimes you need other people to show you those parts of yourself or confirm what you suspect may be there but are afraid that may just be wishful thinking on your part. It's very hard to see yourself honestly. And it's even harder to have to rely on other people to show you yourself. I know you'll understand that. IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:09 PM
quote:
You really touched me with that. Made me cry, actually. I would like to think that people would see the good things, but you can't make people see you as you intend to be seen. They can't do that. And sometimes you need other people to show you those parts of yourself or confirm what you suspect may be there but are afraid that may just be wishful thinking on your part. It's very hard to see yourself honestly. And it's even harder to have to rely on other people to show you yourself. I know you'll understand that.
It doesn't matter what other people may say or think. I am telling you, right here, right now, that i am better for having met you. We all are. You bring to this thread, to us, a sense of optimism, electricity, humility and honesty. I don't ever want you to doubt yourself. Or your capabilities. Or your possibilities. This is how i am seeing you. This is how you are. You are extraordinary, and don't EVER let anyone tell you different. IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:10 PM
metaI don't want you to be sorry. There's nothing to be sorry about. Makes me think that - haven't I taught you anything?  Rafe: without the astrology - though it can be used to affirm this.
I believe/feel that Rafe and I have a past life where he was in a position of power and i was subservient and he took full advantage of that. I feel that the energy from him is highly lustful and that he took what wasn't his to take and he suffered for that - because what he wanted was love and he tried to force it when he could have had it if he had been and done differently. When I think of Rafe I get a feeling in the centre of me - it's purely sexual - but it's not from me to him - it's from him to me. The feeling has enormous depth. But in terms of this personality and life he doesn't appeal to me. He is not a soulmate of any kind, I don't believe/think. IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:14 PM
meta & DDThank you for your encouragement and beautiful words. The reason I hang around here, and with you, and particularly this thread, is because it is where I learn about myself, and also find myself. This is where I have found that, hey, I am actually funny and witty and all those things I've wanted to be or be seen as. So I can be who I am and be seen for who I am. I do say bu11shit things about superficial things - just for a laugh or a jibe or entertainment. Would I really shag Sean Bean behind the pub? Ah, no, not behind the pub. But the real stuff, that's genuine. I appreciate you guys enormously. I value you and your place in my life as much as I value the friends I see in person - maybe more, because you are closer to who I am and my interests and truth. When I think of my friends, I think of you guys. IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:16 PM
metaYour timing is synchronious and impeccable. I made a very conscious decision today to chase a very long held dream that I had come to displace, almost forget and release. But it hung in there by the nails. If it is right it will unfold naturally and easily. I'm waiting........... and hoping. IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:18 PM
I spend my life telling others to find the magic inside themselves. They say that you teach best that which you most need to learn yourself.LOL. It's nearly 4.30am. Should go to bed.  IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:19 PM
quote:
metaI don't want you to be sorry. There's nothing to be sorry about. Makes me think that - haven't I taught you anything? Rafe: without the astrology - though it can be used to affirm this.
I believe/feel that Rafe and I have a past life where he was in a position of power and i was subservient and he took full advantage of that. I feel that the energy from him is highly lustful and that he took what wasn't his to take and he suffered for that - because what he wanted was love and he tried to force it when he could have had it if he had been and done differently. When I think of Rafe I get a feeling in the centre of me - it's purely sexual - but it's not from me to him - it's from him to me. The feeling has enormous depth. But in terms of this personality and life he doesn't appeal to me. He is not a soulmate of any kind, I don't believe/think.
Yes, well sometimes i can be overly-sensitive. And i feel hurt in thinking that i have hurt you, or bothered you, or annoyed you. Wow... this hurts me gravely. I don't even know what to say. What to think... ...i would never want to think that he would be capable of something like... that. But it makes sense. Your resistance. Your distaste. You have said from the beginning that you felt how sexual he was, and you didn't like it. It makes sense. IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:21 PM
quote:
meta & DDThank you for your encouragement and beautiful words. The reason I hang around here, and with you, and particularly this thread, is because it is where I learn about myself, and also find myself. This is where I have found that, hey, I am actually funny and witty and all those things I've wanted to be or be seen as. So I can be who I am and be seen for who I am. I do say bu11shit things about superficial things - just for a laugh or a jibe or entertainment. Would I really shag Sean Bean behind the pub? Ah, no, not behind the pub. But the real stuff, that's genuine. I appreciate you guys enormously. I value you and your place in my life as much as I value the friends I see in person - maybe more, because you are closer to who I am and my interests and truth. When I think of my friends, I think of you guys.
I know! I spend more time in my dorm room talking and laughing with you than i do with anyone!!!! We're such dorks. IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:23 PM
quote:
metaYour timing is synchronious and impeccable. I made a very conscious decision today to chase a very long held dream that I had come to displace, almost forget and release. But it hung in there by the nails. If it is right it will unfold naturally and easily. I'm waiting........... and hoping.
I hope it comes through for you. You deserve it. IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:25 PM
quote:
I spend my life telling others to find the magic inside themselves. They say that you teach best that which you most need to learn yourself.LOL. It's nearly 4.30am. Should go to bed.
Are we all soulmates? Seriously. Do we have any past life connections? I have to go soon too. The theater awaits! IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:26 PM
quote:
And i feel hurt in thinking that i have hurt you, or bothered you, or annoyed you.
but that's what i keep trying to explain to you - that you don't have to feel those things with me - because i don't see you or think of you that way. i don't judge you like that. you can say whatever and i'll understand - i'm just understanding - that's who/how i am. so you're jealous - okay - it's a human quality - one that causes you suffering - something that i'd like to see you be free from. because jealousy stems from belief of competition and there is no competition - you can live your dreams as openly and happily as the next person - everyone can - equally. everyone can have their personal happiness without threat to anyone else - no need for jealousy.
IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:27 PM
quote:
We're such dorks.
I know! But wouldn't have it any other way!
IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel
Knowflake Posts: 3474
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:29 PM
quote:
I hope it comes through for you. You deserve it.
WOW! IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:35 PM
quote:
but that's what i keep trying to explain to you - that you don't have to feel those things with me - because i don't see you or think of you that way. i don't judge you like that. you can say whatever and i'll understand - i'm just understanding - that's who/how i am. so you're jealous - okay - it's a human quality - one that causes you suffering - something that i'd like to see you be free from. because jealousy stems from belief of competition and there is no competition - you can live your dreams as openly and happily as the next person - everyone can - equally. everyone can have their personal happiness without threat to anyone else - no need for jealousy.
But the thing is that i'm not a normal jealous person. I don't get jealous over material things. I get jealous over affection. That's it. I am jealous in thinking that someone is closer to, or is cared for more, by someone i care about. Not necessarily in romantic terms, but just in love and affection. It just seems... it seems easier said than done. IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:36 PM
quote:
I know! But wouldn't have it any other way!
I don't think any of us would! IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:37 PM
quote:
quote:I hope it comes through for you. You deserve it.WOW!
 IP: Logged |
meta_4
Knowflake Posts: 1279
From:
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 01:40 PM
Well, i have rehearsal, so i must take my leave.Don't forget,PA, when you come back you owe me a long message about the feelings/chemistry you feel between AT LEAST TWO people. Sweet Dreams! *MUAH*** IP: Logged |
blue moon
Moderator Posts: 3649
From: U.K
Registered: Dec 2007
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posted October 17, 2008 01:42 PM
"I realised he couldn't possibly be my soulmate....."
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/article1820051.ece Wonder why she married him if she wasn't sure, sounds odd to me, but hey, we are all different. IP: Logged |
darkdreamer
Knowflake Posts: 3198
From: Germany
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted October 17, 2008 02:04 PM
I can only agree to what you both said.I think, in some way I am more myself and more truthful with you on here than I can be in my next environment. And yes I believe we are all soulmates. I don`t doubt it for a second, that we were meant to meet here, because we are all at a point in our lives where we need each other to reflect about ourselves.
This "self-reflection" initiated by each other, can be painful at times, but there`s no need for anyone to feel sorry to have triggered it.
It`s that sort of pain that I welcome and think it`s very worth it. Because it is honest and it is just the facing of a wound - maybe- that is suposed to heal. But before it can heal, it has to be cleaned, and as we all know, that does hurt. But it is a good pain,or at least it leads to good things. And yes, PA, I hope you get what you are hoping for. You really really deserve it.  IP: Logged |
darkdreamer
Knowflake Posts: 3198
From: Germany
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted October 17, 2008 02:13 PM
BM,well, I think she might have believed he was her soulmate at one point.
But it is always sad, if a love dies.  IP: Logged |
darkdreamer
Knowflake Posts: 3198
From: Germany
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted October 17, 2008 02:41 PM
BM,seems you have finally infected me with the virus, that listens to the name of Sean Bean.
What is the cure? Please, quick, tell me! I was just browsing on that other website, that I used to visit often, and it is just now that I realized that that other actor actually had a little part in Sharpe`s company and that I have actually seen it. I slowly wonder what film did I see, where Sean did NOT apear? IP: Logged |
CrimsonChyld
Knowflake Posts: 256
From: Murray, UT
Registered: May 2008
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posted October 17, 2008 03:04 PM
Hey PA and Meta...I have sat here for I dunno how long reading this thread from line 5... since that's about when I went to bed last night lol.
But I have enjoyed reading it! You both have such wittiness about you.. you know what to say and when to say it.. I've always struggled with that.. If I so much as tried to be witty, I'd leave the room with nothing but crickets chirping in the background lol. PA.. you are one of my favorite's who post on here. Not just the funny one's but other posts as well. You are well informed about what you post. And when you're funny... you are sooooo funny... seriously (wait...was that a oxy-moron?) Anyway... just wanted to give my two cents...
Love this thread!
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"Secrets and lies can sleep from the walls of Rome if we sit hard enough on them. They are undeniably destined to come out. Tomorrow, the next day or a hundred years from now!" IP: Logged |
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